Glazed Feelings
by Deanlu
Summary: What happens when during the estrangement of Maura and Jane from the shooting, Jane neglects her health and becomes ill.
1. Chapter 1

**Glazed Feelings**

**Deanlu**

**Rizzoli and Isles are the property of TNT and Tess Gerritson. I am just borrowing them for a little fun. Please review and review often. Let me know what you think.**

Monday had dawned cloudy and cold. Jane had felt the chill into her bones. The constant checking of leads outside the office and interviewing of suspects in their latest homicide had kept her and Frost out until late evening. Two women strangled and raped, then dumped along the harbor. They wouldn't have been found for a while had a man walking his dog accidently happened on them. She hadn't even gotten a descent lunch, just a quick bite from a local corner store. She was tired when she arrived home. The one good thing had been that she hadn't had to face Maura all day. Just a month ago the incident had occurred, the incident being the shooting of Maura's Sperm donor. Maura and her spoke for work and Jane had kept their conversations light, but nothing more. Jane walked through her front door as her phone rang.

"Rizzoli" Jane said quickly.

"Jane? You have time to come over tonight?" Jane listened to Maura's voice. Jane was tired. She wanted her relationship with Maura to be on track, but it wasn't going to happen tonight. Not to mention it was already eight at night. She really should go to be there for Maura, but she just couldn't tonight.

"Maura, I'm going to have to beg off. I'm just walking in the front door. Maybe tomorrow? Is that okay?" Jane asked as she moved into the kitchen and grabbed a beer from her fridge. Maura's answer was slow in coming just like their relationship these days.

"Okay, I'll see you tomorrow?" Jane leaned against the freezer door on her refrigerator.

"Yeah, talk to you in the morning." Maura hung up the phone and stared at it for a long time. How had their relationship gotten so far off track? Maura knew it was her fault. Her responses to Jane after the shooting had shut Jane out. Across town Jane looked into the refrigerator, nothing for her to eat. She needed to shop. A chill swept through her body and then she sneezed. "Damn! I don't need a cold." Jane headed into the bedroom making sure her apartment was locked. She then stripped and dropped into bed setting the alarm.

Tuesday dawned even colder than Monday with rain in the forecast. Frost and Jane had gotten a break in the case. They had gone across town to an apartment house in the young and upcoming business section. Jane knocked on the door of 5J.

"Police, Eric Wilder open up. We have a search warrant for the premises. The door opened to reveal a young man in his late twenties, blond hair, blue eyes, with a strong face.

"How can I help you detectives?" Eric Wilder asked nonchalantly.

"We have a search warrant for the premises." Jane stated as she handed it to him. "You are Eric Wilder?" When the suspect nodded Jane had the officer accompanying them stand with near Eric as he took a seat on the sofa in the living room.

"What are you looking for officer Rizzoli?" The comment had been snarky and biting made to push Jane. She just smiled and fired back to him.

"Jimmy Hoffa's crypt." Eric's smile left his face and anger started to simmer. The officers who had accompanied Jane searched for thirty minutes, but nothing was found. "Thank you Mr. Wilder for your assistance." Jane stated professionally as she and the other officers left. The door slammed in Jane's face.

"You'd think he didn't like me." Jane snickered as she and Frost left the building. Jane got in the car and looked up at the building. Eric wilder stared at the detectives and then closed the curtains. "He did it Frost, I'm almost sure. The evidence is all pointing toward him. I just have to find something concrete."

"Jane, it'll happen. We'll get him." Frost said as rain began to come down. "Shoot, I thought it was to rain tonight." It started pouring quickly turning the dry roads into wet slides. "Jane, be careful. I don't need to pay for a cruiser." Jane moved the cruiser through traffic carefully. The rain increased when suddenly in front of them two cars collided, and then a truck struck the first car. Jane turned on the flashlights of cruiser. Frost radioed in the accident. They both went out into the pouring rain to render assistance. Four hours later, two soaked detectives returned to the precinct. Jane felt awful. Her head felt stuffed and she was cold. Both her and Frost headed toward the locker room.

"Rizzoli! Cavanaugh wants to see you right away!" The front desk officer yelled. Jane stopped and sighed deeply.

"Yeah, heading that way." Jane headed upstairs to Cavanaugh's office. She spent the next hour arguing with Cavanaugh about the search warrant they had performed. Finally, free of her boss Jane headed to the locker room to change. She had planned to take a hot shower, but the exhaustion and lack of food pushed her to change. She headed down to the cafeteria. Her mom was off somewhere on break, so Jane got a cup of coffee and a sandwich. She wolfed both down and went back to her desk. Two hours later she headed out of the precinct home. She had received a voicemail from Maura saying she had to cancel due to work. Jane was fine with that since she felt wiped. Another night of dropping into bed.

Wednesday dawned as bad as Tuesday, except it was raining cats and dogs. Jane's throat was sore, but she ignored it. She stared at the newspaper that sat on her counter as she drank her coffee. Chills swept through her body and she coughed several times. Quickly she grabbed a pack of cough drops from her cabinet. This day was going to suck badly. Just then her phone rang.

"Rizzoli. Yes, I'll be right there." Frost had called. They had another dead body. Jane quickly dressed and headed out. By the time she arrived at the scene Jane knew she was getting sick. The stuffiness had her head in a vice not to mention the she couldn't seem to get warm. "Rizzoli, Victor 825. Jane walked under the tape as Frost came to give her an update."

"Same as before girl, late twenties, strangled, raped repeatedly. Dr. Isles says she has been here maybe four hours." Jane stopped and looked around at the people that had gathered even in the rain.

"Why dump the body here?" Jane asked Frost.

"He needed a new place since the last place had been discovered. Not many people around, even less when raining. We aren't going to have much evidence with the rain." Jane approached Maura and began coughing. Maura looked up from where she was bent over the body.

"Not feeling well detective?" Maura asked rising and approaching Jane. Jane moved off and around the body avoiding Maura.

"I'm fine, just a cough Dr. Isles." Jane quickly reminded Maura where they were and had placed the enforced boundaries Maura had given them in place. She didn't need sympathy or help right now for herself. Now as for the body she needed more information. "So what do we have?" Jane bent over as water dripped from her hair. "Damn rain is causing us to lose evidence." Jane stifled a cough and stood back up. Maura signaled the bodies removal as Jane moved toward the car. Maura caught up with her quickly grabbing her by the arm. Jane spun and broke the hold like she had been poked with a hot brand. "Sorry, just jumpy." Maura stepped back some, but she could see Jane was sick.

"You should be home resting." Maura said concern lacing her voice. Jane looked up at the rain that was soaking them both. Her more than Maura as the good doctor was dressed for the weather.

"No rest for the wicked Maura." Jane looked at the doctor. "I'm the worst there is aren't I?" Maura blanched as Jane began to move away. She could only watch as the detective climbed into the car. Jane drove across town and parked her car. She watched the flat of Eric Wilder. Her phone rang. "Rizzoli... Yeah, I'm sitting down the block by Bagliones. His car is in front, but he hasn't come out. No, I'll watch until you show up. Hey, bring some soup and coffee." A few hours later Frost knocked on the window. Jane unlocked the door and let him inside. By now the detective was coughing off and on. Jane took the soup and drank it down. It felt good.

"You don't look good Jane. You should go home." Frost said looking at his partner. Jane nodded. Suddenly they saw Eric Wilder come running out of the apartment building. He hopped into his car and drove off. Jane followed. Two hours later, after a fruitless time of tailing Mr. Wilder they arrived at his home again.

"Well, this was useless. I am going to head home Frost." Jane's coughing had gotten worse. Frost nodded.

"Stay home Jane. Get well." Jane nodded. She drove home and slowly climbed the stairs to her apartment. She unlocked the door, entered, and leaned back against the door. She so desperately wanted Maura's touch, but it was not possible. Maura had put the lines in place. Maura had to cross them. Jane would not. Jane made it to the couch dropping her coat onto the floor. She grabbed the red socks blanket off the back of the couch and fell asleep.

Thursday morning dawned with sleet falling. Jane didn't move from the couch all night. She woke now shivering between hot and cold. She attempted to rise from the couch, but just couldn't quite manage it. She reached over and pulled her phone out of her coat pocket. She pulled up her contacts list and pushed who she thought was her mother. The phone rang and rang…Jane dropped the phone and was too tired to pick it up…slipping into sleep she never heard the answering voice.

"Jane…Jane…Jane, answer me." Maura's voice echoed over the line…Jane never heard.

Late afternoon, Jane tossed and turned falling off the couch. She heard knocking, but could not answer as the fever her body was encased in ravaged her flesh and mind. She never heard the door open, or heard the footsteps cross the room to her.

"Frankie, help me get her to her bed." Frankie helped Maura pick up Jane and move her to the bed. Maura got her settled with Frankie's help into the bed. "Frankie, go into Jane's kitchen and get me some water. Bring my bag from the living room." Frankie rushed to get what Maura asked for as the doctor went into the bathroom wetting several rags and putting cool water into a small bowl from under the sink. Maura began bathing Jane's brow as Frankie reentered. "Jane, I need you to drink this. Please Jane, come on." Somehow Jane heard Maura and drank the glass of water. Maura then got her to take antibiotics and acetaminophen. Maura then kissed her forehead and helped her settle into bed. "Frankie, I am going to make a list and I need you to get the items. Can you do that?"

"Yes, how did she get this bad Maura? It's not like Jane to not take care of herself." Frankie hadn't seen his sister this sick since she had measles when she was six years old. "I know she has been working hard, but she would have taken care of herself." Maura shook her head. She didn't need to discuss this right now. What she needed was to get Jane well.

"I don't know Frankie, but we will find out. Please run and get the items on the list." Frankie nodded and left. Maura pulled the covers off of Jane. She carefully removed Jane's clothes. She bathed her sweat soaked skin with the cloth. Finally, Maura dressed her in her white socks sweats and a t-shirt. Once sure she was cooling down, Maura left the bedroom. She picked up Jane's gun and badge putting them into drawer in the bedroom that Jane kept them in at night. She then heated some broth Jane had from her cupboard and poured it into a cup. Maura returned to the bedroom. She set cup on the side stand and gently attempted to wake Jane. She noticed the detective was much cooler now. "Jane, I need you to wake up. Come on sweety." Jane opened her eyes recognizing Maura's presence for the first time.

"Maura? What?" Jane's confusion worried Maura.

"Shhh, we are in your apartment. You called me this morning. I need you to drink this Jane. Can you do this for me?" Jane tried to rise, but didn't have the energy.

"Can't get up." Jane said

"Hang on." Maura moved behind Jane propping her up against her. She fed Jane the broth. Jane got three quarters of the cup down before she grew too tired. "Good Job sweety." Maura said as she sat the cup on the side stand and held Jane's body close for the first time in a month. "I'm here Jane. Get some rest and fight this cold." Maura kissed her head and held Jane as the detective drifted into a healing sleep. Maura gently slipped from beneath Jane and tucked her into the covers. She heard the front door open and close. Maura stepped out of the bedroom cracking the door open so she could hear Jane.

"Hey," Maura called to Frankie. Frankie looked up after sitting down two bags of groceries.

"Hey, how is she now?" Frankie made some tea for Maura as he waited for her response.

"Better, for now. The fever will be back tonight. I changed her clothes while you were out. She must have been in fever all last night. Her clothes were soaked. She should get better now that we are here. I have called off for Friday and into Thursday next week." Frankie shook his head.

"Do you want me to stay tonight? I could take the night watch while you sleep." Frankie knew things had been strained for Maura and Jane, but he wanted to be there for them. Especially right now.

"No, but I would appreciate it if you would watch her while I shower. I don't want her waking up with no one here. Oh, Frankie could you put her gun away in the safe in her closet? I know you know the combination." Jane's brother nodded taking a sip of his tea.

"Sure, go on and shower. I'll call for some Thai food. I haven't eaten today and I know you haven't either." Maura nodded and hugged him as she went toward the bedroom. Frankie looked around his sister's apartment. It was all normal since her estrangement from Maura. Dirty clothes tossed all over, bottles of beer in the trash, and food boxes forgotten on the coffee table. He shook his head and took out the trash quick. Then picked up the dirty clothes setting them into the basket where Jane's washer and dryer were located. He called in the order and then turned on the television after checking in on his sister. The weatherman predicted snow for Friday with colder temperatures. Frankie shook his head at least he had stocked up Jane's fridge and cabinets with what Maura required.

"Frankie, you didn't have to clean." Maura said as she came into the living room and sat down next to him.

"I didn't want you having to worry about that while you were caring for her." There was a knock at the door and Frankie went to get the food from the delivery man. The two sat and ate their dinner until Frankie finally broached the subject he had been avoiding.

"You can't stay away from her Maura. She loves you and you love her. She did what she should have in the warehouse whether you like it or not. You can't help that Agent Dean won't leave her alone. She loves you. You know that." Maura sat her box of Thai down and the chopsticks.

"I know Frankie. I should never have let it get this far. I just…it hurt so badly. I wanted to blame Jane for everything. After Doyle escaped, God I wish I knew how that happened, I know I should have talked to her. I should have let her know I didn't blame her. I messed up so bad Frankie." Tears fell down Maura's face as she tried to make Frankie understand. "I don't think Jane will take me back now." Frankie set down his food and pulled Maura into his arms.

"Yes, she will. She has done nothing with anyone since the warehouse. The two times she and I have watched sports together she has missed you so bad. Just try Maura. You're the one who handed Jane the ring back. You're the one who put the barriers into place. You're the one she called today. She needs you. The question is do you need her?" Frankie asked Maura looking into her eyes searching for an answer.

"Yes. I do. I need her desperately." The two heard thrashing in the other room and the sound of a glass hitting the floor. Both jumped up and moved quickly into Jane's bedroom. Maura was by her side instantly. "Jane, calm down. It's Maura Jane. Shhhh, calm down." Jane calmed once Maura began to speak. "Frankie can you clean that up and bring some more water." Maura noted that four hours had passed. She gave Jane more water and medicine for the fever. Frankie bid Maura a good night after cleaning up their dinner. Maura climbed into bed next to Jane and held her. Both ladies were asleep soon after.

Friday morning dawned with snow falling. Maura had awakened in the early hours to give Jane more medicine and bath her brow. Jane had briefly woken enough to take in more liquid and broth. She even was able to handle some yogurt. Now the late morning found Frankie entering the apartment with another bag of groceries and several containers of Angela's soup. After placing them away in the refrigerator he checked on his sister and her fiancé. He opened the bedroom door to find Jane holding Maura in a cuddled hold. Frankie sat down on the edge of the bed and checked Jane. Her fever must have broken in the middle of the night because she was finally cool to the touch. He gently shook Maura awake. He quickly put his finger to his lips signaling her to stay quiet and follow him. He moved out to the other room and got coffee going. He then started breakfast; pancakes with fresh strawberries on the side and bacon. He poured Maura a glass of juice and set her a cup of coffee.

"How is she this morning?" Maura came out in Red socks sweats and Jane's BPD t-shirt.

"Better, her fever broke early this morning. She spoke for a few seconds and drank more water. I'd like to see if we can get some soft eggs and toast into her soon. She hasn't really eaten anything since Monday. Her body has nothing to repair itself with. It's why she got sick so fast." Frankie nodded as he poured syrup over his pancakes.

"Ma, told me to tell you bass and Joe Friday are fine. She also said that whenever you need her just call." Frankie grabbed Maura's hand. "We're here for you Maura. Whatever you need." Maura nodded and squeezed Frankie's hand back.

**TBC**


	2. Chapter 2

**Glazed Feelings**

**Part 2**

**Rizzoli and Isles are the property of TNT and Tess Gerritson. I am just borrowing them for a little fun. This story is developing slowly because I'm actually writing it while I am sick. However, my situation is a little better than Jane's in the story. No pneumonia or flu. Just a bit of bronchitis. I appreciate the reviews.**

Jane heard voices from the other room. Slowly she rolled over and climbed out of bed. She was disoriented and dizzy for several moments. It felt like she hadn't walked in ages. A chill swept across her shoulders and she grabbed the top cover of her bed wrapping it around her body to keep herself warm. Slowly she walked over to the door looking through the opening at Maura and Frankie at the counter having breakfast. It was then she noticed Frankie holding Maura's hand. She let her head rest against the door frame and prayed that didn't mean what she thought it meant. Steeling her will and gathering her strength she walked out of the bedroom and into the living room. Frankie noticed her first because Maura had her back to Jane.

"Well, look whose back from the dead." Frankie said as Maura turned to look. It was taking all Jane's energy just to walk. Maura hopped off the stool and moved to assist Jane.

"Hey, why are you up? You need to be resting." Maura helped Jane to the couch. Jane sat letting her head fall back against the couch and closed her eyes. She was so tired from just the short walk from the bedroom. She felt Maura touch her head looking for fever. "Frankie, we need more acetaminophen." Frankie brought over the pills as Jane took them and drank all the water. "How about some soup? Your mom sent some over." Jane nodded. Frankie went to the kitchen to heat up some soup.

"Saw you and Frankie talking. Saw you holding hands." Jane said in a whisper as her cough reasserted itself. Maura grabbed hold of Jane bracing a hand against her chest. Jane took slow shallow breaths trying to catch the air she needed after the cough. Maura helped her lean back against the couch. "You are making a good choice." Jane said breathlessly.

"Jane, I have not chosen Frankie. How could…No, let me rephrase that. I have chosen you no matter how hard it is at times. I want to be with you. Frankie was just comforting me over you." Jane went to take a breath when another cough asserted itself. Maura helped her through the spasm.

"Frankie, come here a second." Maura called. Frankie took Maura's place as she went into the bedroom for her bag. She came back out and took the stethoscope out. Frankie moved as Maura sat down and listened to Jane's lungs. There was a slight congested sound. Maura reached into her bag. "Alright, let's get some soup in her, then more medicine, after which you are going to be steamed a little, and back to bed."

"I'm fine." Jane said as another coughing spasm shook her.

"For once Jane Rizzoli you are not going to argue or I'll bring your mother over here." Jane looked through sickly eyes as her pale face seemed to pale even more.

"You wouldn't dare," she said as she rasped for breath." Maura's look told her to not push it. "Fine." Frankie brought the soup. Jane got about half the bowl down before the coughing spasms kept her from taking anymore. Maura then decided the steaming was more important. Frankie assisted Maura getting Jane to the bathroom. Maura turned the shower on as hot as it would go and closed the door. She helped Jane stay braced in a sitting position on the bathroom toilet as the steam began to do its work. Jane began coughing, but this time her cough was more productive. Thirty minutes later Maura helped Jane out of the bathroom. She helped Jane change her clothes and tucked her into bed. Maura then gave her cough medicine with codeine, tessalon pearle, and her next antibiotic. Frankie brought in the peppermint tea with honey and handed Maura the Menthol Camphor. Frankie stood by as Jane began to protest.

"No, you will listen to Maura Jane. We found you almost dead when we came in the other day. You either follow Maura's instructions or I will take you to the hospital." Jane glared at her brother, but she gave in to her brother and Maura. Maura rubbed the menthol camphor across the front and back of Jane's chest. While Maura went to the bathroom to clean her hands Frankie stood by and made sure she drank the tea. Maura returned as Jane set the tea down. Her eyes were heavy and sleep was pulling at her. Frankie and Maura went to move out of the room.

"Maura, can you stay?" Jane called the rasp less pronounced than last time. Frankie whispered he would get the dishes clean and wait in the other room. Maura moved back and sat on the side of the bed. She took Jane's hand noticing that the fever had returned even with the pills from earlier. She had another two hours before she could dose Jane again. Maura reached up pushing some hair out of Jane's eyes. "I…thank you for being here and helping me."

"I'm not going anywhere. I'm sorry." Maura said trying to convey more than the words would let her express. Jane was having a hard time staying awake. "Get some rest Jane I'll be here when you wake. We will talk when you're better. I promise." Jane opened her eyes looking at her girlfriend. Maura leaned forward kissing her brow. When she pulled back Jane's eyes were closed and sleep had claimed her love. It was then that Maura noticed the rasp from Jane's breathing could be heard. She waited twenty minutes before she moved into the living room. Frankie was watching the local news on the storm. "We may have a problem. Jane's congestion in her chest is worse. I'm going to call a friend and see if there is anything else we can do." Frankie got up and took Maura by the shoulders turning her around.

"How bad?" Frankie looked into the worried eyes of Doctor Isles.

"Right now, it could just be bronchitis. But it could go into pneumonia. I just don't know Frankie. But I am going to do my best." Frankie nodded pulling Maura into another reassuring hug. Maura pulled out of the hug and went for her phone. After a fifteen minute discussion with her friend at Boston General Maura came and sat back down on the couch. "I need a favor. I need you to go to the corner pharmacy. My friend has called in a set of prescriptions for Jane. They are stronger than what I have been giving her and should do the trick. He said that if the snow storm allows for it to bring her in on Monday. But she should be fine until then."

"He wants to see her at the hospital?" Frankie was nervous as this would be a problem getting Jane to go.

"No, he has a clinic about five miles from here. He will call me on Monday if the weather had improved. If not, he will make a house call." Maura sat with Frankie on the couch.

"She is such a royal pain sometimes Maura. When do I need to go?" Frankie asked.

"I would think they will be ready in 30 minutes. He has put a rush on them." Frankie got his jacket and boots on right away. "I'm going to head down now to make sure they don't close up because of the storm. I'll be back." Frankie headed out of the door as Maura returned to the bedroom. She sat on the other side of the bed listening to Jane breath and holding her hand. She was definitely going to make things right after this so Jane didn't doubt her.


	3. Chapter 3

**Glazed Feelings**

**Part 3**

**Rizzoli and Isles are the property of TNT and Tess Gerritson. I am only borrowing them for a little fun.**

**I have to apologize to all. I have been very sick. I am better now, but overwhelmed with catch up work. I will update as quickly as I can, along with my other fanfic pieces.**

Frankie came back through the door of Jane's apartment. He shook the snow off his coat and stomped his feet to remove it from his boots. It had taken 45 minutes at the corner drug store along with several arguments with the pharmacist. It ended with Frankie flashing his badge and ordering the pharmacist to stay open until he had filled the prescription. Frankie hoped the pharmacist did not call his boss, but no matter what it had been worth it especially if the medication kept Jane from going to the hospital. He set the medication on the counter and hung up his coat. He listened to the quiet apartment. He could hear the cycling of the heater, the hum of the refrigerator, and then something else. Slowly he moved toward the bedroom as quietly as he could he opened the door to see Maura cuddled into Jane's side. Jane's arm was wrapped around Maura protectively, even as Maura's hand rested on Jane's chest measuring its rise and fall in her sleep the other hand buried under Jane's head and neck propping her up with the hand resting on her back. It was in Frankie's mind a perfect picture except for a desperate wheeze to intake air and exhale the same out that echoed softly in the room. Frankie moved quickly across the room and sat down next to his sister. He gently woke Maura. Her eyes registered confusion until she saw him and then looked at Jane. Just as she was about to say Hello she heard the desperate wheeze of inhalation from Jane.

"Frankie, where's the medication?" Maura's panicked voice sent Frankie rushing into the other room. Maura heard him grab the bag even as she watched the rise and fall of Jane's chest. Frankie came back into the room handing the bag over to Maura. Maura poured the contents out onto the bed removing the packaging. She quickly selected a vial and a syringe from the pile. Carefully checking the dosage Maura drew the appropriate amount. She leaned over and spoke softly to Jane. "Jane, its Maura. I need to give you an injection of medicine." Maura covered the needle. The ME then swabbed Jane's arm and uncovered the needle. She quickly delivered the injection. She then attempted to wake Jane. The detective woke, but quickly began to fight Maura. Frankie grabbed hold of Jane's hands making her fight harder. "Frankie, let go of her hands. Please, you have to let go of them." Frankie though was attempting to restrain Jane so she would not hurt Maura.

"No, let go!" The desperate gasping wheeze issued from Jane's lips. Frankie held on even as Maura tried to pry him loose. "No, Hoyt let me go!" It was like a bucket of icy water thrown over Frankie. He dropped Jane's hands backing away from the bed even as Jane continued to thrash about in the bed.

"Shhh, Jane. Shhh, it's Maura. Calm love, no one can hurt you. I won't let you them. Shhh, Hoyt is not here." Maura continued speak softly, soothingly to Jane while stroking her hair. Jane began to calm even as she broke out in a heavy sweat. "That's it sweetie. Shhh, yes…just relax." Jane's eyes fluttered open looking around in confusion. Maura blocked her view commanding Jane to look at the ME with her eyes. Recognition flared in Jane's eyes even as the tears slid down her cheeks in relief that the monster wasn't real, was only a dream. "Shhh, I know. He's not here only Frankie and I." Jane turned her head seeing her brother standing next to her bed fear and hurt in his eyes.

"Sorry, not thinking straight." Jane said breathlessly. She closed her eyes for a moment trying to get her muddled thoughts to sort out.

"Shhh, it's okay. Jane, I need to listen to your breathing." Maura looked toward Frankie. "Can you help me get her propped up?" Frankie nodded and finally moved. After a few moments he had Jane propped against the head board on several pillows. Maura pulled out the stethoscope from the nearby stand and listened. Jane's breathing had eased. Maura nodded. "Okay, I need you to drink some more water. Then take these other medications that were sent." Jane nodded too exhausted to argue. This scared Maura more than anything. The only healthy Jane was a one that was protesting and arguing, if Jane was compliant something was deeply wrong and her friends knew to be concerned. Jane got the medication down and the water. She was soon asleep again. Frankie moved into the other room. Maura leaned over spreading menthol camphor on her chest and back. She then wiped her brow and across her pulse points on her neck, and under her arms. Once she was sure Jane was settled and okay she joined Frankie in the other room.

"I hadn't realized how deeply he still affected her." Frankie said from where he sat on the couch staring at his hands. Maura moved to sit near him letting the young man who had looked up to his big sister for so long speak. "I have always looked up to Jane. She has always been this larger than life person." Frankie glanced sideways at Maura. "She was my protector in school and my biggest supporter when I didn't think I could accomplish my goals." Frankie looked back down at the floor a tear slid down the man's cheek. Maura waited listening to this new perspective of her partner. "I remember the night Korsak called mom and dad to tell them Jane was injured in the line of duty. He didn't tell them right away that Jane had been attacked by a serial killer." Frankie stood up wiping his eyes and walking over the window that looked down upon the snow covered street below. "He didn't want Jane to suffer the drama of mom." Frankie laughed softly and looked over at Maura. He turned back to the dark cold night seen outside through the window. "But he told me." Frankie's voice was almost too soft for Maura to hear. "He told me every detail that he knew. He felt he had failed Jane, ignored her intuition and insight. He felt he hadn't been the partner she should have had. He's been trying to make it up to her ever since." Frankie took a shaky breath in and placed his hand on the cold window pane. "I wanted to go down to where they were holding Hoyt and rip him apart. I wanted to inflict on him the pain both physical and emotional he had done to Jane only I wanted it to be a thousand times worse." Maura came up behind Frankie wrapping her arms around the young man. "How long Maura? How long will he live in her mind and control her?" Frankie's voice quivered desperately needing an answer.

"I don't know. But every day Hoyt becomes less and less in her mind. She's ours Frankie. We just need to remind her we are here for her." Frankie turned around as Maura released him.

"I used to pray she would find some guy who could put up with her and give her what she was looking for in life. I was wrong. She didn't need a man. She needed you. I'm sorry if I have caused you two any grief." Frankie pulled Maura into a hug and softly kissed her head, much like Jane would to Maura. "Thank you for saving my sister." Maura nodded to overcome with emotion.

"Come on, we need to make something for us to eat in a bit. I need some sleep. Can you stay awake while I rest for a while?" Frankie nodded. Maura moved toward the bedroom. She checked Jane one more time relieved that the fever and breathing seemed better. She lay down next to Jane cuddling into her side. "You, Jane Rizzoli, are so important to so many people. I don't think you realize how much we all need you. Fight harder love. I know you're tired, but you need to fight harder." Maura whispered softly into Jane's ear. The ME never saw the detectives eyes just barely open watching over her as the Maura fell asleep. Once asleep those same eyes checked the room to make sure all was good catching her brother's eyes as he peaked into the room to check on the two ladies. Some silent message passed between them and Jane closed her eyes.

"I'll keep you safe this time." Frankie whispered softly. He closed the door and returned to where the television played the basketball game between Boston College and Purdue. He sat on the couch until he heard a soft knock on the door. He rose and checked through the security viewer. He leaned his head against the door. Opening the door, Frost and Tommy stepped through.

"How is she? I've barely been able to keep mom from coming over?" Tommy said as he and Frost hung their coats. Frankie moved into the kitchen pulling beers from the refrigerator. Both men accepted one and moved into the living room where the television played the game.

"Jane's bad. Maura had to call a friend and get stronger medicine earlier. We have administered it, but Jane has been hallucinating, griped in fever, coughing, and difficulty breathing...just bad. We need to be quiet. They are both sleeping right now. Maura hasn't left her side." Frost smiled at that since he had been worried their relationship had been stretched beyond fixing.

"We're here for a little bit. We will watch over them for a while. Anything we need to know?" Frost asked.

"Just check on them every half hour. I'm worried Jane will stop breathing." Frankie said softly. Frost eyes widen in shock as well as Tommy's.

"Is she really that bad?" Tommy asked worried that maybe he should have brought his mother with him.

"Yes, but Maura has it under control." Frankie said as he rose to put his empty bottle of beer in the trash. "Food is in the refrigerator, take what you need."

"Why don't you go rest in Jane's spare room?" Frankie nodded at Frost's suggestion.

"Yeah, maybe for a little bit." Frankie moved down the hallway. Tommy and Frost watched him go.

"Man, your mom is going to be mad that she wasn't here to help." Tommy nodded.

"We will let Jane and Maura tell her. I'm sure that if Maura needs her mom will get a call." Tommy said. Frost rose and walked to Jane's bedroom door. Quietly he opened the door. Maura was cuddled tightly against Jane's side. Jane looked pale, a faint sheen of sweat covered her body, and she looked as if she had lost weight. Tommy looked in from behind Frost.

"This is bad." Tommy whispered.


	4. Chapter 4

**Glazed Feelings**

**Part 4**

**Rizzoli and Isles are the expressed property of TNT and Tess Gerritson. I am just borrowing them for a little fun. Well, my doctor says that I am definitely on the road to recovery. I just need to rest and keep the vitamins up. A couple things you need to know. In my version of reality I have slightly diverged from the series and will keep this divergence from now on. Agent Dean did not sleep with Jane, but he did spend the night at her apartment on the couch. He went in an attempt to change her mind about Maura and her. I'm afraid that for me they are a couple experiencing the ups and downs of a relationship. If you do not agree, please do not read.**

**As always please review and review often. **

Jane rolled over in her bed to find it empty. She was extremely warm; however, the cough which had been plaguing her for the last several days had finally abated some. She looked toward the window where the curtain was partially drawn back by her lover's hand. Maura seemed in deep thought as she gazed out of the window.

"I didn't mean to shoot him Maura. It was training as a cop that took over. You're taught in the academy that once you are fired on, you take the shot if you are sure of not injuring any civilians. When Dean was shot I know you think I shot back because I loved him, but it's not true." Jane stopped letting her head fall back taking several shallow breaths. She was so tired, but it was time to exercise this demon since she felt like she might not get the chance at a life with Maura. She had never felt this sick before and it was scaring her. She had searched her normally endless reserves she had to call on and found those completely depleted. "Dean did come to my apartment that night before. He did stay on the couch. No, I don't know why I let him stay. I just did." Jane glanced over at Maura whom had not moved since Jane spoke. Jane closed her eyes. "I never meant to hurt you by making you think I loved him. I never meant to hurt you by shooting your birth father. I never…I never wanted to give you a reason to doubt me or my love. I know sorry is so little…so empty to what…to what has happened, but I am Maura. I am sorrier than you will ever know. I do love you…please, don't doubt that. I would die for you honey." Jane's voice fell silent even as the thoughts tumbled through her brain in chaos. A whisper of air moved over her causing her to shiver and pull the covers tighter around her.

"But will you live for me Jane?" Maura's vibrant whisper spoke from within inches of Jane. Jane felt the fever gaining ground on her again as she opened her eyes. Maura laid alongside of her, her hand hovered over Jane's face bare inches from touching her. "Will you live for me Jane?" Maura's question came again demanding an answer. Jane's thoughts warred inside her. No one had ever asked her to live for them. She was an officer of the law. She was used to sacrificing for everyone else. Even in the Rizzoli family her mother expected her to take care of Frankie and Tommy. What Maura asked flew in the face of everything she had been taught. Yet, as she gazed into Maura's eyes she knew this woman deserved all of her, everything she had to give because she was the only one who had taken the time to really look. Not even her mother had done that.

"Yes." Maura nodded and then ran the cool rag she had been holding across Jane's brow. Another shiver ran through Jane. The detective closed her eyes reasserting her iron will with Maura's love.

"I forgive you Jane. If you will forgive me. I was stupid. I reacted with emotion to the shooting. I reacted with emotion to seeing Dean leave your apartment building early that morning." Jane's eyes flew open. "Ahhh, you didn't remember. I was supposed to pick you up that morning. We were going to have breakfast and drive into work together. So, yes, I did think something more happened. I forgot a couple things about you, about us. I forgot that you would never endanger our relationship with a simple roll in the hay. I forgot I'm your thing, not Dean. I forgot how much we have invested in each other over time. I let anger, jealousy, and pain rule my emotions. So, I am sorry. I'm sorry if I…I'm not the perfect woman you thought…not the…" Maura never got to finish the sentence as Jane pulled her into a hug.

"You are. You are more than you will ever know to me. I love you Maura Isles." Jane's grip weakened a bit as exhaustion began to pull her under again. The chaotic sounds and taunting voices within her mind had become quieter. Maura recognized Jane's exhaustion for the sickness that was trying to hold on to her.

"Hey, stay awake for me for a little bit more. You need to eat and take some medicine. Jerry will come by this afternoon to check on you." Jane's confusion over who Jerry was soon cleared from her face when Maura answered her question. "Jerry is my friend who prescribed the medication for you. He has a break from the hospital for a short while. Angela is going to bring hot food over so he will get a good meal and short nap here if that's okay?" Jane nodded. "I'll be right back. Don't fall asleep too deeply." Maura moved off the bed and left the room. Jane opened her eyes listening to the sound of soft voices. She closed them again as she listened to soft laughter of joy. She picked out Tommy's tenor rumble, Frosts' deeper rumble, and Frankie's nasally Italian. She inhaled a little no longer feeling the burning. She needed to go to the bathroom though. She threw back the covers and struggled up. She slowly made her way to the bathroom. When Maura came back in with a tray and Jane's meds the ME momentarily panicked not seeing the detective in her bed. She set the tray on Jane's side stand and moved to the bathroom. Jane had finished and was now leaning looking at her figure in the mirror.

"I need a shower." Jane said flatly. Maura nodded and helped Jane to sit down on the toilet.

"Hang on a sec." Maura moved out to the living room. "Frankie, I'm going to help Jane shower. Can you strip the bed and put clean bedding on it while we are in the restroom?" Frankie nodded, getting up quickly, and moving back to the hallway closet where Jane kept a second set of sheets and blankets. Maura reentered the bathroom. The M.E. set the showers temperature. She stripped Jane's clothes and then hers away. She helped Jane into the shower and began scrubbing away days of sweat and illness. Once Jane was clean she pulled the detective against her holding her to just let the heat of the water and the steam work to free more of the mucus and phlegm that continued to threaten her. Jane hummed her approval as Maura continued to run her hands softly over her back.

"I've come to the realization that Einstein was right." Jane whispered into Maura's ear.

"What about love?" Maura asked as she firmly, but gently held Jane. She was still surprised when this rough, tough, and factual detective brought forth some piece of wisdom she had gleaned. It was one of those little things that Maura loved about Jane. She would spend a lifetime just enjoying all the little nuisances and different levels to her detective.

"Any intelligent fool can make things bigger and more complex…It takes a touch of genius-and a lot of courage to move in the opposite direction. Einstein was talking about science and making new discoveries." A coughing fit took Jane producing the phlegm that Maura's was hoping would be freed from her bronchial tubes. A few minutes later Jane was being held against Maura again.

"You were saying?" Maura asked feeling Jane begin to tire. She reached for the shower nobs to turn them off.

"I think he was really talking about love. Love takes so much courage." Jane's tired voice was laced with pain. Maura pulled back to look Jane in the eyes. "But the reward is so worth it." Jane's voice finished.

"Yes, it is." Maura kissed Jane's wet brow. Maura dried Jane and then herself. The M.E. helped the detective dress. She set her on the toilet while she dressed in a robe. The couple left the bathroom to find fresh sheets and blankets on the bed. A small wooden table had been set near the bed. Jane's food had been reheated and set on it along with a glass of water, a bottle of Gatorade, and a pitcher of water on the night stand. Maura helped Jane get comfortable in the bed. Jane was really tired now, but it felt so good to be clean. Her muscles didn't ache as bad and the covers felt so invitingly warm. The detective also discovered she was extremely hungry and felt like eating. Maura set a small bed tray over her legs and then placed a bowl of Angela's minestrone soup on the tray.

"Where did you get this?" Jane asked tiredly.

"Your mother sent over this and the Zuppa Tuscany, plus a couple of other soups that seem to help when you sick." Maura replied. Jane pointed to the second bowl on the tray.

"You need to eat too. Go on." Jane watched until Maura grabbed a bowl and sat on the bed cross legged to eat with Jane. While Jane ate Maura spoke about the storm that raged outside, how Frankie and Frost would be leaving in the hour because help was needed out on the streets, that Jo Friday would be coming home with Angela this afternoon, and how Tommy was still losing at chess against her. "I'm telling you Jane he left his bishop totally exposed," Maura said as she placed the dishes on the tray next to the bed and gave Jane her medicine. Maura then filled the syringe noticing that they were on the last dosage. Jane pulled back the right sleeve of her t-shirt wincing slightly at the injection. "There, that's the last one of those. We can switch you to the pills next." Jane rolled her eyes.

"What is that you were giving me?" Jane trusted Maura, but shots were still a little disconcerting.

"It's the liquid form of a new super antibiotic the hospital has been using on severe bronchitis and pneumonia patients. I received special permission to give it to you." Jane grabbed Maura's hand as the doctor set the spent syringe back on a small tray where the medicine was located.

"You did this to not take me to the hospital?" Jane saw the confirmation in Maura's eyes. "I also noticed you and Frankie have been here every day since I became ill." Maura looked away for a moment. "You both took time off to take care of me. Cavanaugh couldn't have liked not having his lead Medical Examiner around. How many days?"

"A week, I took off a week." Jane knew Maura was out of days, especially since the shooting and other things that had happened. "How many days have I been home?"

"It's Sunday. You've been ill since Wednesday, but home since Thursday. Frankie and I found you on the floor of the living room shivering with fever." Jane's shocked face told Maura that Jane didn't remember much from the last few days. "Come on, I know you're exhausted." Jane moved to a more comfortable position. Maura went to remove the dishes from the room, but Jane once again grabbed her hand weakly pulling her back.

"How do I repay you? You seem to always be caring for me Maura. Are you so sure I am what you want? I take so much maintenance." Maura sat next to Jane running her hand over the woman's strong features. Strong…yes that was it.

"The strong normally do, believe it or not. They risk so much for others, giving all most of the time. So when they fall it is normally hard. They need those who truly care to be there for them. You are so strong Jane. I will always be here to catch you." Maura leaned over and kissed the amazing woman she had given her whole heart to and more. It was like falling all over again for this beautiful woman. The kiss lasted longer and went far deeper emotionally and lovingly than either had planned. Questions fell away as answers asserted themselves in the two women. Maura broke the kiss first leaning back just a bit stroking Jane's cheek with her thumb. ""I fall for you every time, a thousand times I will commit my heart and soul to you, and I will catch you Jane when you fall. I love you." Jane pulled this magnificent woman against her just absorbing the grace she had been granted in the form of Maura Isles. Jane never felt when Maura left the room so deeply asleep had she fallen in her loves arms.

"Thank you" Maura whispered to the unknown that had been watching over the two women. The tray with the dishes set on the counter, but Maura's hands were braced there holding her up against the onslaught of emotion as her heart slowly knitted back together from the love surrounding her.

"I told you." Frankie said softly. He had come up behind Maura. Maura turned the soft tears of relief falling down her cheek. Frankie took her into his arms and held her as the weeks and weeks of pain finally fell away. Tommy looked across from where he sat and moved into Jane's bedroom to watch over his sister for a while. "She has always and will always love you Maura. She is just afraid. You are her safe place." Maura nodded. She cried for a little longer and then pulled out of Frankie's arms.

"Thank you for being here for me…for Jane. You are a treasure Frankie." Maura kissed him on the cheek. He smiled and hugged her tightly.

"I have to go. Keep an eye on her. Mom should be here in a couple hours. Jerry called while you were out and said he is on his way." Frankie hugged her once more and then moved across the room to buckle on his gun belt. The police vest was already in place under his shirt. His coat now covered both and he moved toward the door.

"Be safe, your family needs you." Maura called softly. Frankie turned and smiled. The door closed with a click behind him. Maura moved over to lock the door. She then headed into the spare bedroom and pulled several items from the closet a t-shirt, a pair of sweats, and socks. She dressed quickly and returned to Jane's room where she caught Tommy whispering softly to his sister and then placing a kiss on her cheek. Jane's breathing was better from what Maura observed. She moved to the bathroom and fixed her hair. Maura exited the restroom to find a cup of hot tea set on the side table next to the bed. Maura moved into the living room with her tea where the chess board waited. "Alright, let's see if I can destroy you again." Maura said as Tommy smiled.


	5. Chapter 5

**Glazed Feelings**

**Part 5**

**Rizzoli and Isles are the property of TNT and Tess Gerritson. I am just borrowing them for a little fun. As always please review judiciously.**

Maura watched out the living room window as the snow continued to come down. Frankie had called two hours after he left that he would be working until midnight, but would be coming back to Jane's to sleep. He asked how his sister was doing to which Maura replied as well as could be expected. It had made Frankie nervous, but she reassured him that Jane would be fine.

"Maura?" A deep bass of Doctor Jerry Reynolds called across the living room. "You okay?" Maura turned to face her friend. Doctor Jerry Reynolds was a muscular African American man with rugged looks that made women swoon. Jerry was smart, intelligent, and had a bed side manner to match. He specialized in private practice, but was also contracted with Boston General to work in the emergency room on weekends guiding new interns.

"Yes, I'm just tired. Jane has been ill since Thursday." Jerry sat down on the couch motioning Maura to sit near him. Maura took a seat near Jerry.

"You need rest. I want you to make sure Jane's mother is on the way. When she gets here you are to sleep. You will not do Jane any good if you continue on this course." Jerry had taken her hand and was checking the good doctor's pulse. He nodded when he was finished. "It's good to see you, though I wish it weren't under these circumstances. Your friend is one heck of a lady. I can't wait to see her when she is healthy." Maura smiled at the unexpected compliment from Jerry.

"Tell me, how is she and please do not sugar coat it." Maura's look told him she wanted the plain unvarnished truth. He nodded while sitting back some.

"She's lucky. She's lucky you and Frankie found her when you did. Jane has walking pneumonia. I'm sure it was much worse from your description on the phone of when you found her. The medication is working. I brought the same antibiotic you have been giving her that I prescribed. The cough medicine and steroid are helping to reduce the inflammation. I gave her a breathing treatment which wore her out. She probably should have been in the hospital days ago, but you have got her to the point she is healing. Now she needs rest, medication, and food. Your friend has lost quite a bit of weight during this illness. She can't afford to lose anymore because she needs to rebuild her strength. Rest and TLC Maura will fix her now." There was a knock on the door. Maura rose and crossed to the door. Outside the door was Angela Rizzoli loaded down with bags of groceries. Maura opened the door and let her girlfriend's mother inside.

"Sorry I am late. Weather is awful outside. Not to mention I had an argument with a snow plow driver. Can you believe he was going to plow in the driveway before I backed out?" Angela set the bags on Jane's counter. She then removed her coat, gloves, scarf, and hat depositing them on the coat rack area. Mama Rizzoli turned hugging Maura tightly and whispered, "You know there is a very handsome gentlemen sitting on the couch?" Maura giggled.

"This is Doctor Jerry Reynolds. He has come over to check on Jane." Angela moved forward shaking the man's hand.

"Anyone who can heal Jane has my vote as friend. Angela Rizzoli, nice to meet you. How's Jane?" Jerry saw Maura shake her head no.

"Jane is recovering under Maura's expert care and your amazing food." Angela beamed with pride.

"Where are my manners? Maura said you came for a meal and rest. Now let me get dinner started while Maura shows you where the spare bedroom is located." Angela moved off to the kitchen watching as the young ME showed the doctor to Jane's spare bedroom. Maura showed Jerry the bathroom and bedroom.

"Maura, why didn't you want Angela to know?" Jerry asked as he unbuttoned the cuffs of his shirt and removed his shoes.

"She would have insisted on staying here until Jane is well. She tends to smother Jane. I want my friend to be able to rest without a visit to the hospital." Jerry laughed quietly. He hugged Maura.

"You are an amazing friend. Albert was right about you." Maura smiled at the mention of Jerry's life partner. "Okay, let me rest for four hours. I let Albert know I am here so he doesn't worry." Maura threw a pair of Frankie's sweats and a T-shirt on the bed.

"The shirt might be a little tight." Maura moved toward the bedroom door. She paused a moment and turned to look at the doctor. "Jerry? Are you sure she will be okay?" Jerry paused in readying himself for bed to observe Maura's countenance for a moment. Yes, deep worry and … was that love? Oh, so now he understood why Maura was so worried.

"Yes, she will be fine. She just needs to rest, take the medicine, and eat. I want to see her Wednesday when this storm is over and cleared away. Maura, it's good to see you in love. Does she love you?" Jerry had to ask. He had seen Maura hurt so many times that he couldn't stand to see the utter devastation again in her face.

"Yes, she does." The words made Jerry smile. He crossed over to Maura grabbed her in a bear hug and spun her around.

"You old fox. You actually caught one and a butch one at that!" Maura laughed Jerry's joy infusing her with relief. Jerry set the doctor back down on her feet. Maura gave him a soft kiss on the cheek.

"We will have to go out for double when Jane is well again." Jerry nodded as Maura left the room. The doctor laid down enjoying the rest from his weekend's labors and chuckling about how Doctor Maura Isles had finally found the other half of her heart.

Outside on the snow covered street the blanket of white covered parked cars, trees and buildings. Snowplows worked clearing the cold, white blanket as quickly as possible. Cars slid here and there attempting to navigate the icy streets while the cities inhabitants huddled inside at least, all but one. Eric Wilder watched the warm light that reflected out from the apartment on the second floor. He had sat outside for the last five hours. It had taken days to find where the lady detective lived. She would be a perfect addition to his harem. He just had to wait until the extra people in the apartment left. He could wait. Waiting was something he was very, very good at. He watched as Doctor Isles closed the curtains to the apartment. Just maybe he would grab the good doctor too. Maybe.


	6. Chapter 6

**Glazed Feelings**

**Part 6**

**Rizzoli and Isles are the property of TNT and Tess Gerritson. I am just borrowing them for a little fun. Well, Spring Break has finally occurred for me. I have spent the last several days running around South Texas and have reservations on the island for the weekend at a hotel that does not have any electronics at all. Just a weekend of beach combing, resting, and spending time with my love, however, I will be writing several fanfics to the end. I will also be posting several new pieces until then. I have had a lot of inspiration lately, so expect a minor avalanche! Please review, as always. **

Maura helped hold Jane up while Jerry did another breathing treatment on Jane. Jane had a lot more color than she had a few days ago, but was still desperately tired. Jerry pulled away the mask with the medicine and steam as Jane took slow deep breathes of the cool, dry apartment air. She immediately began coughing though it was much less the gurgling, wheezing sound Maura had grown accustom to over the last few days. Jane leaned back into Maura exhausted after the coughing spell pasted. The warmth of the medical examiners body leeched into Jane's causing her eyes to flutter shut. The young woman was so tired that she never felt Doctor Reynolds using the blood pressure cuff or the beep of the thermometer.

"Better, I believe she is over the worst. Jane is just in need of a week of rest and no physical exertion." Jerry said looking at Maura. Maura nodded, calculating that Frankie could take off the rest of the week that she did not have off. "I will warn you. This is a serious illness. Jane technically should have been hospitalized for the last few days. I want to see her Thursday in my office. If she has any sort of relapse you will have to bring her to the hospital." Maura nodded as Jerry wiped the now sleeping detective's brow with a washcloth. "Maura, she needs to eat too. I believe Angela's soups will help, but right now anything is pretty much a go for her. She has lost quite a bit of weight. She needs to rest, eat, and then next week I believe she should begin with light workouts to rebuild her strength."

"Thank you Jerry. We both appreciate it." Maura said as she kissed Jane's head. Jerry helped the ME lay Jane down. Jerry watched as Maura tucked Jane into bed gently rearranging some errant locks of hair and caressing Jane's face. Maura leaned over and whispered softly into Jane's ear. "I'll be right back. I have to show Jerry out and whisk your mother away. I'll be back baby. Just rest." Maura kissed Jane's ear. Jerry grabbed Maura's hand helping her from the edge of the bed and walked with her into the living room. Neither one saw the slitted eyes of Jane Rizzoli watch them leave. Nor did they hear Jane leave the bed and walk unsteadily to the bedroom door to listen in on their conversation.

"Thank you Jerry for everything. Tell Albert I am sorry that I took you away." Jerry shrugged his coat on and watched as Angela Rizzoli pulled on her coat from the nearby coat rack.

"Albert is used to me being gone with work. But maybe I could convince Angela to cook us an Italian dinner sometime to make up for the missed night tonight." Angela stopped pulling her mittens on and gave Jerry one of those smiles she reserved for only her children.

"It would be my pleasure. Any friend of Maura and Jane's are family. How about I do one better? You and Albert are invited to Sunday Lunch this weekend. Would you both be willing to come?" Jerry looked at Maura, whom was nodding.

"We would love it. Let me confirm with Albert and then I will give Maura a call." Jerry hugged Angela Rizzoli and then hugged Maura. "Remember what I said about Jane. No physical exertion of any type right now." Jerry winked at Maura who blushed crimson. Angela snorted a laugh.

"Yeah, right. Those two are like little bunnies in spring all twitter pated." Maura hadn't believed she could blush even redder, but she did." Jerry laughed a deep booming laugh.

"Oh yes, I am going to love getting to know Jane." Jerry kissed Maura on the cheek. "I am so happy for you. Albert will be too. Enjoy it Maura. Love like this comes along once in a life time." Jerry hugged her one last time. Then Angela hugged her whispering softly to the doctor.

"If you need anything you know how to reach me." She pulled away and looked the ME in the eye. "Anything daughter." Maura's eyes pooled with tears as she watched the two step out the door. Jane who had been listening quickly returned to the bed exhausted from just the minimal amount of energy she had expended.

"Can I give you a ride home my lady?" Jerry asked Angela.

"I would be delighted young man. You can tell me about Albert." Maura watched walk down the hallway chatting and laughing. Something clicked inside making the doctor feel good for a change. Family and friends that's what it was she felt. Ever since Jane Rizzoli came into her life she could actually say she had family and friends she could count on and not be ashamed of today. Maura closed the door, locking it, and moved to the bedroom.

Outside, Eric watched as Angela Rizzoli and Jerry Reynolds climbed into the doctors Lexus. The car's headlights came on and then headed off down the snow covered street slipping a little here and there. Eric returned his attention back to the apartment's windows watching as the lights went off in the front rooms and a small lamp was turned on in the bedroom. Soon, even that lamp went out. He waited twenty minutes watching as his warm breath fogged the inside of the car windows.

Then thirty minutes as he figured the young ME would be entering REM sleep now.

Another twenty minutes and Eric left his car approaching the entrance to the building. He entered the first set of doors from the cold outside. He glanced over the mailboxes inside the entrance locating detective Rizzoli's. He then pulled out the shiny gold key and inserted it into the second set of security locked doors. A gentle click resounded and Eric stepped through and closed the door quietly. He looked at the steps leading to the second floor and the detective's apartment. _Time was in his hands,_ he thought as he pulled a small box from his pocket checking the two filled syringes. He would have two nice additions after tonight to his harem plus he would get the dreaded detective out of his life once and for all. He was sure she was the one who had focused on him. All the women did in his life. All of the women he knew wanted him so it was his job to give them what they wanted. He felt almost God like in the way these women came to him, sought him out for their fulfillment and joy. Just like Detective Jane Rizzoli. She had searched for him. He knew deep inside that the murders were just an excuse. The real reason was she needed him. Well, he was coming for her. They would be together. The doctor would be a nice addition. She didn't know him, but when she did she would most likely need him just like Jane. He moved stealthily up the stairs and then down the hallway. In the apartment across the hall he could hear a stereo playing quietly. He hesitated briefly looking at the neighboring door, then turned away and pulled out a silver key. Quietly, he unlocked the door. He pushed it open allowing the light from the hallway to give him his first glimpse into the apartment.

Quickly he memorized the layout and moved inside. He closed the door as he allowed his eyes to grow accustom the darkness. He heard the mumbled sounds of voices in the other room. He moved to the bedroom door slowly being careful not to bump into any furniture or make any sound. He peaked inside to find two bodies lying side by side in the bed. He moved toward the bed pulling the first syringe from his pocket. Quickly he stabbed down on the detective in the bed only to find he had stabbed a body pillow.

"I knew you were guilty Eric." Jane's raspy voice called from the corner near the armor. The light came on briefly blinding the young man. Jane Rizzoli was sitting in a chair, her gun tightly clutched in her hands, and the medical examiner behind her. "I knew it was only a matter of time before you killed again or came after me. " Eric was panicking now. His plans were falling through and he needed to escape. Then Eric got a good look at the detective and began to laugh. The hand holding the gun was shaking from the effort, sweat dripped from her body, and he could tell her breathing wasn't normal.

"You're sick detective. I bet I could get to you and your scrumptious doctor before you even got a shot off." Eric began moving toward Jane. He could still make this work.

"Probably, but do you want to risk it Eric?" Jane asked hoping she would not have blood to clean up from her bedroom tonight.

"I have nothing to lose detective." Eric began to move when he felt the cold, hard steel of another gun against the back of his head.

"Go ahead, make me do it." The voice of Frankie Rizzoli's hard edged voice stated. Eric calculated how far Jane was from him and how much serum was still in the syringe. "Don't even think it. You'll be dead before the needle even touched her or me." Eric took a deep breath allowing the syringe to fall to the ground. Frankie quickly shoved him against the wall and cuffed him. He pulled Eric out of Jane's bedroom as he radioed for backup. Jane dropped her gun she had been holding as she began to collapse to the floor. It had taken everything she had to be strong and protect Maura, but she had done it. Maura grabbed Jane slowly lowering her body to the floor.

"That was risky and stupid Jane. Thank God Frankie was on his way here already." Jane heard the front door open as Frost's voice carried through the opened bedroom door.

"Jane? Jane, are you alright?" Frost barreled inside the room as Vince spoke with Frankie in the outer room.

"Yeah, can you two help me back up into the bed?" Maura shook her head.

"You wait while I get CSU to take the pillow and syringe. Let me move you out in the other room." Maura pulled a padded blanket from the closet, quickly checked to make sure Eric had been removed from the apartment, and then had Frost help her walk Jane to the couch. She covered Jane as she elevated her feet. Maura then sat on the edge of the couch as CSU entered and headed to the bedroom.

"Did we get it all on tape?" Jane asked as she found a more comfortable position. Maura nodded as she wiped Jane's face and placed two small ice packs under her arms that Frost had brought her from the kitchen. The fever had returned and she needed to cool Jane down again.

"Yes, but no more Jane. You will not do one more thing on this case or I swear I will take you to the hospital and have them place you in ICU. Do you understand me?" Jane looked at Maura. Her lover's eyes showed fear, anger, and relief.

"Alright, I will do as you say Maura." Frost nodded to Maura as she worked on the detective. Vince came over and set down on the chair beside the couch.

"Well, that will go down in the books as one amazing case. I need to take you're statement Jane. I want to do it now and get it out of the way." Maura's eyes flashed with anger, but Frost's hand on her shoulder caused her to bite her tongue at her words.

"You better take it now Vince, because no one will be allowed contact with Jane after this except Frankie, Angela, and I until she is well. Is that understood?" Vince nodded and looked toward Jane. Jane was being reasonably quiet and appeasing. Yep, Jane knew she was in trouble with the medical examiner.

"So explain to me how you knew he would come here? You have been out of it for most of the weekend." Vince asked as he began to take notes.

"It was little things when I talked to Frankie. Frankie stated he had seen a car outside running its engine, but never going anywhere. Then one night as he came back from the pharmacy he noticed that there was someone in the car sleeping as he passed. Not abnormal for homeless, but when the car is one of those higher end deals." Vince nodded as Maura made Jane take some water. Jane leaned back letting the water relieve some of the heat from the fever. "When Maura was out of the room I took some time to glance out the window and check the car. Frankie had given a good description and it was always there. So I called Frost on the quiet to start looking into it." Maura turned on Jane anger coloring her face. "Shh, I never lingered long. I have been resting." Maura's anger calmed and Jane turned her attention back to Vince. "I told him not to spook the driver. I made a short call to Frost when Maura was out of the room. Frost confirmed later it was a car that Eric could get his hands on and from there it all added up. Frankie agreed to help, though Maura was the hardest sell." Jane replied a cough shaking her thin frame. She leaned back after the spasm had let her go resting. "I have to admit I was scared I wasn't up to it, but Maura had my back as did Frankie."

"I think you are going to need another week off Jane. Too many cases, too much emotion lately." Vince glanced over at the medical examiner. "You need to care for yourself better. The Eric's of the world will always be around. You and Maura won't. Let her take care of you and you take care of her." Jane looked over at Vince staring long and hard. Finally she nodded.

"Maybe you're right." Jane resettled grabbing Maura's nearby hand. "I can't live without her anymore." Jane began to relax into the couch. Maura kissed her head and then headed into the kitchen. Vince moved closer to Jane and whispered softly.

"I will let you know what we find when we search Eric Wilders house, but I am sure we are going to find the final nails for his coffin. Please listen to Maura; she only wants what's best for you. She still feels guilty about the shooting. You can see it in her eyes." Vince gently rubbed Jane's shoulder.

"I know. She thinks I do not see it, but I do. She has to forgive herself as well Vince. I will make sure she does." Maura came back into the living room with three bowls of Zuppa Tuscany, drinks, and medication for Jane.

"If you two are conspiring I will find out." Maura said as she helped Jane sit up to eat. Vince, Maura, and Jane ate while CSU completed their work. Leon, one of the CSU men came over and had Jane initial for the items that were taken. Frost checked the room once more and then saw the teams out. Maura brought him a bowl of soup, and then headed into the bedroom to remake the bed.

"I need a favor from you two. Maura has been here round the clock since I got sick. Can you get her to go out for a while as a break? It would mean the world to me. Not to mention she hasn't seen Bass in a few days. How is Jo?" Vince smiled at Jane's concern for Maura.

"Jo is fine, but I don't think we could get Maura out of here with a sledge hammer." Vince saw Jane's pleading eyes. "But I will try." Maura returned helping Jane to the bedroom with Vince's assistance.

"All settled?" Jane nodded and began to slip into sleep. Maura caressed Jane's hair thanking God that the Eric Wilder business was all over and Jane could recover. Maura got up and walked out into the other rom fully expecting to send Vince and Frost packing. Instead she came up against a wall of stubborn concern.

"I believe you could use a break. Come on Frost will watch Jane and we can catch a breath of air for a moment. "Nope, no protesting I have to insist." Maura sighed and acquiesced. Frost watched Vince and Maura leave the apartment. Then he watched as they walked down the snow covered streets to the detective's car. It was late, so they were the only ones there. Frost looked toward where Eric's car had been. Frankie had made sure it was towed for evidence. He had to admit he liked Frankie now that he had gotten over his jealousy of Jane being with Maura.

"Is she gone?" Frost nodded, turning to look at Jane. "Okay, hurry up. We don't have much time."

"Jane, she is going to kill you." Frost responded putting on his coat and heading out the door.

"At least I will die a happy death." Jane whispered at her partner's retreating form.


	7. Chapter 7

**Glazed Feelings**

**Part 7**

**Rizzoli and Isles are the property of TNT and Tess Gerritson. I am only borrowing them for a little fun. Please review.**

Korsak helped Maura out of the car. They were they had found a parking spot upon their return to Jane's apartment. The odd side of the street had been plowed and the snow removed by city workers. Maura looked up toward Jane's window of her apartment. A soft glow came from the window suggesting Frost had kept the lighting low and was still watching over Jane. Korsak helped Maura with the two bags she brought. Maura had loved seeing Bass. The tortoise had listened as Maura spoke of Jane's illness and Maura offered an apology for not being around. Maura took a deep breath and looked at the night sky. Stars sparkled back at her as she set herself for caring for Jane and getting their relationship back on track.

"Hey, you okay?" Vince was worried about Maura. He could tell she was still angry and stressed, but she wouldn't talk to him.

"Yes, I just need to get back to Jane." Vince picked up the bags and they booth started up.

Upstairs Jane relaxed on the couch inside the blanket that Maura had pulled earlier from the closet. Frost finished lighting the last candle. "Okay, that should do it." Frost looked around the apartment. Small glass crystals hung from the ceiling, candles were set around the apartment causing the light to be reflected throughout the crystals. On the Coffee Table sat an Italian crème Cake with Happy Birthday Maura written across it, chocolate covered strawberries sat on plate nearby with jasmine flowers surrounding them, a bottle of Champaign, and soft soulful jazz played in the background. Several gifts were piled next to the table from friends and family, plus one special gift from Jane. In the kitchen on the stove sat Lasagna, a hot loaf of garlic French bread, and salad. Vince and Maura had been gone for about an hour and a half. Marissa had helped Frost get things ready. She loved seeing Jane in love and cared for because she had seen the alternate and it was not good. Marissa had gone back to her apartment with assurances from Jane she would call on her if needed.

"She is still going to kill you Jane!" Frost's voice echoed across the apartment. Jane nodded and closed her eyes. "Hey, you okay?" Jane nodded again. Frost walked over and placed a hand on her forehead. "Time for more medicine Jane." Frost quickly helped Jane take her next dosage and bathed her brow. The sound of a key in the lock brought Jane back from the haze where she had been drifting.

Jane didn't have the energy to rise, so she sat up the best she could while Frost went to the door and opened it. Maura stepped inside and her mouth dropped open. Frost quickly took the bags Maura brought and set them inside the bedroom checking everything there. He then grabbed Vince's arm and ushered him out of the apartment.

"Jane can fix this one." Frost mumbled as he and Vince headed to the car.

"Happy Birthday Maura!" Jane said softly, her eyes alight with the mischief she had caused now. Maura couldn't believe it. It was like she had stepped into a wonderland.

"Jane, how did you? Jane I swear if you wore yourself out." Jane shook her head.

"Nope, Marissa and Frost helped me. They knew the plan days in advance. Not all those phone calls were about Eric." Maura took her coat off and moved to where Jane sat on the couch. "I know that we have been apart for a while. I had planned a big birthday party for you this year and then the shooting happened. Your birthday came and went, but I made sure you had a good day. I had the guys take you out, ma agreed to spend time with you along with Frankie and Tommy, and I made sure with Crowe's help that Detective Ainsley's case was given to another examiner." The afore mentioned detective had joined the force just a month after the shooting and had taken glee in harassing Maura. The strained relations between Jane and Maura hadn't allowed the medical examiner to ask for Jane's help or her teams. Jane had noticed and made it her personal mission to shut Ainsley up. The team had rallied around Jane and made sure the medical examiner was protected, especially after one particular bad incident. Jane had gone to Cavanaugh on the quiet and explained what Ainsley was doing. Lt. Cavanaugh had made sure retribution was clear and hard on the detective; however, Jane was now his new hated person. She took his razzing with no trouble. She had been built of thicker skin, but she would not let her friend suffer his barbs and lances. "I could never forget you Maura." Maura felt tears come to her eyes and slide down her cheeks. Just then Jane's stomach decided to announce its hunger with a loud growl.

"I think we better feed you. Then how about we save this and move to the bed for rest. We will talk more in the morning." Maura said holding Jane's hand while gazing into her eyes.

"Yeah, I will agree. "Maura picked up the cake and strawberries taking them to the kitchen and covering them. She set them in the refrigerator and then pulled two plates down for her and Jane. She filled the plates and took them into the other room. She gathered up the Champaign and placed it in the refrigerator, but pulled two cans of green tea ginger ale and a bottle of water for Jane. She returned to the living room where the two ladies ate in silence. The warmth of the moment was all they needed.

"Hey, can I have a little more?" Jane asked, her appetite returning after being absent for so long. Maura brought Jane a little more and then relaxed back into the couch. Dinner finished and candles blown out Maura helped Jane rise and go to the bedroom. Jane leaned against the door as Maura entered ahead of her and gasped. The room was strewn with rose petals across the floor and bed, the bathroom door stood open with steam rising from the tub where a bath had been drawn. Maura turned to look at Jane her hand covering her mouth. "You will always be my girl, even if you hate me Maura." It was more than Maura could take the damn of emotion burst as she fell to the floor. Jane lurched forward grabbing her cushioning her fall. They landed in a pile with Jane on the bottom and Maura covering her. Deep sobs escaped from the woman who had been so strong for so long. "Shhh, it is okay. We are together Maura. Everything is going to be fine." They laid there for half an hour until Maura cried herself out.

"I was so wrong. I hurt you so badly when you had really done nothing wrong. How can you even stand to look at me Jane?" Maura's quivering voice clouded with tears asked.

"Because I love you Maura. I love you. I'm not without blame. I made you doubt me, distrust me, and I hid from you so we couldn't work things out. But I am here." Jane wiped Maura's tears away. "Maur, you have to forgive yourself. We all make mistakes. It's not the mistakes that we need to concern each other with, it's what you do after you make them that counts. True love and caring make a person try to right the wrong even if there is no way they can." Jane held Maura as the months of pain, loneliness, and hurt fell away. Maura quieted to the point that Jane thought she had fallen asleep. "Babe, you awake? Can we get off the floor? I was kind of looking forward to a bath." Maura nodded and rose off of Jane. She then pulled Jane up and helped her into the bath. She turned to leave, but Jane caught her hand. "Uh uh, undress and get in here. I wouldn't want to drown." Maura looked like she was about to protest. "Uh uh, been there and done that. Just need you." Maura sighed and undressed. She slipped into the tub behind Jane. The tub was lukewarm now, but the feeling of comfort from Jane's body against hers wiped away any other discomforts. Maura bathed Jane and herself. They then relaxed together for a short while.

"Jane, I think we need to get out and dressed. Did Frost give you your medicine earlier?" Maura inquired as she ran the sponge over Jane's arm.

"Yeah, he gave me my meds. Said if I didn't take them you would kick his butt in kick boxing next week. You know you have him scared of you. He says you're fierce like a momma bear." Jane snickered while Maura smiled.

"Okay, let's get out time for bed." Maura helped Jane get out, towel off, and dress for bed. She made a quick flip of the top cover sending the rose petals fluttering to the floor. The medical examiner then tucked Jane into bed and joined her on the other side. She blew out the last of the candles and snuggled into Jane. "You are quite the romantic, detective." Maura said as she felt her body relax and sleep begin to take hold.

"Nah, you just inspire me Doctor. You just inspire me to be a better person for you." Jane kissed Maura pulling her in tighter. Her eyes opened one last time taking in the room around them making sure they were protected and then glancing down at the doctor cuddled into her. "I love you Maura, good night."

"Good night Jane. Oh and Jane?" Maura called softly.

"Yes?" Jane answered.

"I'll kick your butt later." Maura said as she finally gave into sleep. Sleep finally came to the two ladies, a healing sleep where the worries of yesterday fell away and the hopes of tomorrow rose up again. Jane dreamed only of Maura that night and Maura dreamed only of Jane.

**This is not the end. After all, what would a good story be if there weren't some minor twists and turns? Not to mention, Jane is still sick.**


	8. Chapter 8

Glazed Feelings

Part 8

Rizzoli and Isles are the property of TNT and Tess Gerritson. I am only borrowing them for a little fun. Twist, twist, twist on the wind….snickering. Please review.

The sun shone through the windows covering the detective with a warmth all of its own. She stretched like a cat waking from a nap rolling over into the warm body of doctor Maura Isles. Jane took a deep breath in feeling a slight hitch, but not the overriding heaviness that had been present the last few days. Jane opened her eyes to a very sound asleep Maura Isles. Quietly the detective slipped out of bed and into the bathroom. The detective did her normal morning abulations and then slipped out of the bedroom. She started coffee feeling tired still, but not the overwhelming exhaustion. She had a coughing attack in the kitchen that left her clutching the counter.

"Damn, that hurts." Jane rasped as firm, strong arms grasped around her. Maura had heard the coughing spell and come in to find Jane bent over holding on to the counter.

"Easy, easy. Slow shallow breathes." Maura held on to Jane. The detective soon was able to stand again. Jane looked over at Maura ashamed of her weakness. Maura helped her sit on a chair.

"Time, Jane. You will be back to health sooner than you know it." Maura poured a cup of coffee for Jane and her. She sat on the other side of the counter. "So tell me, how did my strong, beautiful detective get so sick?" Maura had been waiting to brooch the subject for some time. Jane sat for a moment in thought.

"I think…I think this last year was a lot. Remember the doctor at the hospital said I was okay to return to work. But really inside everything has kind of felt a little off. Then Hoyt, Peter, and the shooting at the warehouse, our estrangement, it was just all too much. I've been tired and wrung out. When I stopped working out with you I should have known something was wrong. Then this last case had me running out in the weather and I got wet. Plus not eating right. It all came to a head." Jane sipped her coffee more. "I missed you." Jane's voice said in a bare whisper.

"Jane" Maura said, getting up and moving around the counter. She laid her hands on the detective's shoulders. "Jane, no matter how apart we were I would never want you to neglect yourself. Promise me you won't do this again." Jane looked into Maura's eyes.

"As long as you promise to not leave me again." Jane said softly back.

"Jane…I…" Maura began to protest.

"No, Maur. It works both ways. I need you. I'm not good at being by myself, the only time I am happy and okay is with you." Jane pulled Maura closer opening her legs and fitting the ME between them. "We work in every way." The medical examiner leaned her head against Jane's and nodded.

"Okay, you win." Jane smiled wrapping the blond haired woman in a hug. Jane and Maura moved to the couch. Jane lay down with Maura lying on top. Jane was never sure when she fell asleep. She just knew hours later she heard voices nearby quietly arguing. She decided to let them and fell back into sleep.

"Hey Sleepy head, can you wake up and eat for me?" Jane rolled over from where she was tucked into the couch to find Angela Rizzoli watching over him.

"Ma? Where's Maura?" Jane began to panic.

"She went for a walk with Vince. I wanted her to get out of the house a little." Jane relaxed and nodded. Angela helped Jane sit up and then placed a tray in her lap. Jane ate Italian baked chicken with pasta.

"You have slept most of the day honey." Jane looked over to see it was already two in the afternoon. Her mother sat and chatted with her bringing her up to date on all the news from the precinct. She talked with her about Carla Tullucci's latest problems. "I told her she needs to let Robert go out in the world and be a man."

"You sure Robert knows how to be a man?" Jane glanced at the clock noticing several hours had passed. Vince and Maura had yet to return. "I mean, Carla has babied him for so long." Jane's mother nodded.

"I know. But he has to start some time Jane." Jane nodded. Robert Tulucci had always been a momma's boy. Jane suspected that he was gay too. She had never been brave enough to ask since the young man always ran to his mother and told everything.

"How is Tommy doing? I know he was here one night while I was sick." Jane asked leaning back against the pillows on the couch.

"Okay, he said he struggles daily with the desire to have another drink, but he has too much to fight for now. He really cares about you and Maura." Jane nodded feeling a wash of exhaustion come over her.

"Mom, can you help me to the bedroom. I am tired again, but want my bed." Angela Rizzoli smiled. "It had been a long time since Jane had asked for her help. She removed the tray and helped Jane to the bedroom. She then set out her medicines and watched as she took them. "Thanks ma. Please let me know when Maura comes back." Angela knelt next to the bed and ran her hands down Jane's hair. Jane remembered once when she was sick her mother had sat next to her bed running her hands over her hair easing the tension from her illness. She missed moments like this with her mom, but she would never tell her. She felt a soft kiss on her forehead and the sound of the bedroom door closing. Jane surrendered to sleep.

"Hmmm, mmm, mmm." Angela hummed as she washed the dishes. Angela was just finishing the dishes when Maura, Vince, and Frost came back in through the door.

"I don't know what killed him. The toxicology reports should tell more, but those will be in a few days." Angela looked over at the detectives and medical examiner.

"Come on, I have dinner waiting for you three." Angela set salad, the Italian baked chicken and pasta, and bread on the counter. Maura glanced toward the couch. "She's in the bedroom. She woke around three, ate, and then asked to go back into the bedroom to sleep. She looks a lot better Maura." Maura nodded slipping to the door and peeking inside. Sure enough Jane Rizzoli was sleeping soundly, Maura closed the door.

"What did you tell her when she woke?" Maura asked. She sat down as the other two detectives began to eat.

"Only that you had left just a little bit before with Vince. She doesn't know you have been gone most of the day." Angela poured coffee for the two detectives and handed an herbal tea. "So is it true. Did Eric Wilder really escape custody?" Vince stopped eating.

"Yes, damn officers transferring him were first timers and loosened his cuffs because he was whining. He got loose. They are lucky they have their lives. Not going to be much good for anything but security guards at a mall now." Vince swore under his breath.

"We have two unmarked cars stationed on the street. I let Marissa know to keep her windows and doors locked." Frost said. "Jane and Maura are not to go anywhere without an escort. Frankie will be here in a bit to stay. Jane won't question why he is here, so we can keep her in the dark for a while." The sound of hard coughing came from the other room. Maura rose and went quickly into the bedroom. Jane was on her side next to the bed. She had curled into a fetal position from the coughing. Maura began comforting her attempting to ease her pain.

"So tired of coughing, hurts like fire." Jane raspily responded. Maura grabbed the nearby stethoscope and listened. Jane actually sounded much better. "Maur, it's okay. It's just from coughing so much. Relax. When did you get back?" Jane asked noticing the sun was setting outside her window.

"Just now, Vince took me for a nice walk. Bass says Hi by the way." Jane smiled. She also knew Maura was lying. She could smell the telltale signs of the morgue at BPD on her. Jane didn't mind the smells they just gave her clues to what Maura had been up too. She supposed Vince and Frost needed her on a case.

"Go eat dinner. I'll be waiting in here for you." Maura leaned over kissing Jane gently. Maura released Jane and watched as she rolled over. Maura knew she should tell Jane, but she couldn't risk Jane having a relapse. Why were the choices she and Jane faced always so hard it seemed? Maura rose and left the bedroom closing the door as she went. Jane fell back into a deep sleep not knowing the danger that lurked close by.


	9. Chapter 9

**Glazed Feelings**

**Chapter 9**

**Rizzoli and Isles are the property of TNT and Tess Gerritson. I am just borrowing them for a little fun. Sorry about the late posting. I am working very hard right now getting my students ready for state testing. I have not forgotten you all. Please review.**

Frankie Rizzoli entered the darken apartment quietly. He laid his keys on the stand next to the door after he locked it. He was tired. Patrol has been crazy with several accidents from the icy weather. Then he had to break up a fight between two homeless men over who had the right to the heater grate for the night on the corner of Fifth and West Street. He had solved the discussion when he took them both in for disorderly conduct. They would both have a warm place to rest, a meal, and even a shower. The latter he had arranged with a friend in holding so they could get a set of clean clothes and feel clean for a change. It wasn't much, but by tomorrow they would have forgotten the argument and be on the street again. Frankie stretched noticing his ma had left the light on over the stove for him. He walked over to the note left on the counter.

_Frankie-_

_Jane and Maura are in sleeping. Frost is in the car outside. Vince is on the couch. Wake him and tell him to go home. Dinner is in the oven. _

Frankie glanced over at the stove noticing the oven light on. The light for the heat was on warm. Using a pot holder he pulled out a plate for himself. He smiled as he set it on the counter and grabbed a beer from the fridge.

_Son, Jane still doesn't know about Eric. Please protect her. She is better, but not enough for his craziness. I love you. See you tomorrow._

_Mom_

Frankie shook his head at the note. He hadn't agreed with Maura, Vince, and Frost about keeping Jane in the dark. He had nodded his head though and followed their lead. Frankie walked over to the couch and woke Vince. It took a couple of gentle shakes and then a hard shove to get him to wake.

"Geeze Vince. You are supposed to be watching out for Jane." Frankie whispered fiercely. He was more than a little aggravated that the detective was sound asleep on the couch.

"Eric isn't coming around here. He will wait for Jane out there. He has time and money on his hands." Vince rose slowly. Frankie heard several of the older detectives joints pop and crack as he did. He knew Vince only had so many years left on the force. Time, age, and stress took terrible tolls on officers of the law. Vince was beginning to show some of the signs.

"Yeah, well we can't be too careful. Eric is one smart cookie. If he can escape two police officers then he can show up here. Get some rest Vince." Frankie saw the detective out the front door. He then went to the kitchen and began to eat his meal. After about fifteen minutes he realized he wasn't alone. He looked up and across the room into the eyes of his sister, Jane. Her eyes caught the light from the stove causing them to glitter ethereally. She walked so quietly across the room he thought she was a wraith at first.

"Eric has escaped?" Jane asked in a whisper. Frankie nodded.

"I had planned on telling you tonight anyway when Maura was in the restroom or out." Frankie said, and then took another bite of his chicken.

"Vince and Frost didn't want me to know because I was sick." Jane asked looking for confirmation in Frankie's eyes. She found it and a little more. "Maura too?" Frankie nodded and put his fork down. Jane kind of deflated. She couldn't blame them. If she was honest she had to admit she couldn't take down a perp to save her life right now, but it hurt her pride.

"Hey, they are worried about you. You have been real sick. Maura has been frantic inside at points I am sure, especially with your estrangement. Have faith in her, Vince, and Frost. Let us take care of you Jane. I know you are strong you don't have to prove that right now. We know it. Scalpels and bullets prove it." Jane looked into her little brother's eyes knowing exactly what he meant.

"I am a cop Frankie. I should be able to protect myself. I protect the public. What does that say when I can't even protect myself?"

"It says that sometimes the world is bigger than one person can take on so they have to depend on those they trust. Jane we are here. You have so many people to trust. Let us take care of you, please." Frankie stepped around the counter now. He laid his hands on his sister's shoulders pulling her close. "Please!" Frankie pleaded softly. She leaned forward pillowing her head against his chest. "Janie, let me take care of you for a change. I owe you so much." Jane's thoughts whirled inside her head. She knew being stalked and hunted was dangerous. Every time she had gone out on her own she had been grabbed, except the one time with Maura. But that had been a setup from the beginning with Hoyt. Jane began to cough a little, but not the harsh cough of earlier in the evening. She was so tired.

"All right, don't let them know I know. I'll let them have their way for now." Jane closed her eyes drifting off while her brother hugged her. The waves of exhaustion over took her some, and then she felt him shift his hold. The next thing the world spun as she was picked up and carried back to her bed. Jane didn't even have the energy to protest. It scared her how her body failed her so quickly right now. She felt Frankie tuck her in and Maura roll spooning into her. Strong, lithe arms wrapped around her providing a feeling of safety all out of proportion to the act. Jane submitted to her weakness falling into a deep healing sleep trusting her friends to protect her, except for that little area in her mind which went ahead planning.

Elsewhere, in a warehouse flat across the city Eric Wilder clipped two wires together by soldering the ends. His new short haircut, dye job, and false mustache had altered his appearance some; however, he had added a set of glasses. He had found it was enough to allow him to hide in plane site. He hummed to nessum dorma from the Opera Turandot. Eric set the wires into the device and reseated the outside of the device. He looked at the three devices he had created. Yes, he would take care of Detective Jane Rizzoli once and for all. Then as the song neared its end Eric began singing the final line…

_"Dilegua, o notte! Tramontate, stelle! Tramontate, stelle! All'alba vincerò! Vincerò! Vincerò!"_

("Vanish, o night! Set, stars! Set, stars! At dawn, I will win! I will win! I will win! ")


	10. Chapter 10

**Glazed Feelings**

**Chapter 10**

**Rizzoli and Isles are the property of TNT and Tess Gerritson. I am only borrowing them for a little bit of fun. This is going to get a little intense. I hope it pleases you. Please review your humble Bard.**

Jane Rizzoli woke to the sound of her Maura's harsh shouted words. Frankie's shouting almost drowned out Maura's.

"No, I understand, but the danger. No, I am not arguing with you sir. Yes, I want to be the head medical examiner. Alright, I'm on my way." Maura's frustrated voice argued.

"I understand I am a patrol officer. Yes, but she needs protection. How do you know he won't come after her? Yes, this is an emergency. Alright, I'm on my way." Frankie's voice resounded. Then, "Tommy, I need you at Jane's apartment as fast as you can get here. Yes, I know what's happening. I don't give a damn if you're an ex-con this is our sister we are talking about. Get here." Frankie ended the call.

It didn't sound like they were arguing with each other. The shouting stopped followed by the sound of feet moving and the front door closing. Silence reigned for the next fifteen minutes. Jane rose from her bed placing her feet on the floor. It took her a few minutes for the dizziness to pass. She felt nauseous this morning, her head was pounding, and the cough had returned some. She reached for her medication on the night stand carefully measuring out the prescribed amounts and swallowing them down with water. Once she felt ready she stood up using the nearby wall to steady herself. It was still too quiet for her. She walked out into the living room and found no one. She looked in her kitchen and even checked the closet. No one was in her apartment. She went over and opened the door peeking outside. No one was in the hall. She closed the door locking it and engaging the security chain. She then walked to the window and looked outside. She didn't see Frost, Vince, and in fact there were no police cars on the block.

She began to shiver and not from her cold. She walked to the bedroom and to her gun closet. She pulled her police issue gun and the smaller gun she kept for emergencies. She moved to the closet pulling out a pair of jeans and a t-shirt. She then moved quickly to her dresser pulling out underwear. She quickly dressed almost collapsing when she began coughing extremely hard. She stopped and waited for the spasm to end. Once she was sure of herself the detective grabbed a special strap placing it around her ankle and sliding in the emergency gun. She then pulled up her black boots she had put on and checked herself in the mirror. Nope, couldn't see a thing. She then placed her revolver in the holder on her hip. Just as she was putting a special Red Sox jersey over top to rid her of the cold chills a knock came at the door. Jane moved stealthily to the door and looked through the security viewer. It was Marissa. Jane opened the door.

"Hey, what can I do for you?" Jane asked.

"Actually, Maura asked me if I could sit with you until Tommy got here. She was worried you might wake up and need help." Jane let Marissa inside and closed the door. She then locked it and moved to the couch.

"I was wondering where everyone went." Jane said as she sat on the couch. She was still tired and the nausea had gotten worse. Jane had to stay awake and be ready. She was sure this had something to do with Eric.

"Have you eaten?" Marissa inquired. Jane shook her head no. "How about if I make some breakfast for you and then you can take your medication?" Jane nodded.

"But I already took my medication." She said as she grabbed the remote and turned on the television.

"_Jerry, people were running and collapsing after leaving the Baldera building here in the business district. Emergency personnel have arrived on the scene. Health officials do not know what to make of it yet. The head Medical Examiner has just arrived on scene. Dr. Isles, Dr. Isles could we have a minute? _

"_Sorry Kitty, I'll have statement for you later today." Maura responded. _

"_Jerry, as you can see Dr. Isles is very busy right now, but has assured us she will speak to us later this afternoon. Ambulance, police, and all emergency personnel are working to help people. I believe emergency people are just as baffled to what is happening as we are Jerry."_

"_Kitty, we have to interrupt you. We are receiving reports from the second incident." Suddenly the scene changed to another location in Boston. Several people lay on the ground completely still and not moving. There were no signs of injury. "Kent, can you hear us? Tell us what your situation is?" _

"_Yes, we are reporting live from Faneuil Hall Marketplace. Several people near the marketplace reported a sweet smell filling the air and then people began collapsing to the ground. Several who were further away are disoriented and are walking like they were drugged. Emergency personnel are just arriving on scene." A squad car pulled up with an ambulance behind. Frankie jumped out and began directing those who were not injured, but near the market to a waiting place to be checked. A HAZMAT crew then showed up along with other personnel. _

"_As you can see ladies and gentlemen there have been two incidents at two very different locations within the greater Boston area. At this time we do not know what is happening, however, police are asking for those of you in the public to stay home. Keep the roads clear for emergency personnel. Excuse me ladies and gentlemen, the mayor of Boston is about to address the public."_

"_Good Morning Ladies and Gentlemen, I am only going to take a few minutes right now to speak with you. Officers, Firemen, and Emergency Personnel are currently responding to two incidents that have occurred in the greater Boston area. I am asking that all Bostonians please remain where they currently are or return home. I am asking that people in the areas of the Baldera building in the business district and the Faneuil Hall Marketplace please remain calm, remain indoors, and off the streets to allow emergency personnel to assist those in need. We currently do not know who is responsible for these incidents, but police are working diligently on the cases. Homeland Security and the FBI should be arriving in several hours and will work with our personnel to find the person responsible. People of Boston I can assure you that these are narrowly located events. Please remain home, remain calm, and we will update you in a few hours as we receive more information. Thank You!" Reporters called out Mayor over and over, but he was whisked back behind closed doors._

_"Well Bostonians, there you have it. Please remain calm, remain at home or where you are located. Please return to a safe place if you are in the open. Please keep the streets clear for emergency personnel." _

"This is what has been happening?" Jane said softly not quite believing what she was seeing. Marissa nodded bringing Jane her breakfast. Jane got up to leave when Marissa pushed her down.

"Maura told me to tell you that you are not working this case by order of Lieutenant Cavanaugh. You are still on sick leave for another week and will remain in bed. She also told me to say and I quote, "Do you understand me JANE!"" Jane looked at Marissa for a long moment and then acquiesced. She began eating her breakfast as she watched the scenes being broadcast. They had returned to the location where Maura was and in the background she could see Maura dressed in a chemical suit checking each person. Marissa sat next to her watching it also.

"This scares me Jane. What could it be? Could it be a terrorist attack?" Jane shook her head.

"I don't know Marissa. I just don't know." Marissa picked up Jane's empty plate and took it to the sink.

"Hey, I'm going to use the restroom. You need anything?" Jane shook her head. Marissa went into the hall bathroom and closed the door. There was a knock on Jane's apartment door. Jane got up still paying attention to the television. She supposed it was Tommy.

"So what took you so long?" Jane asked as she opened the door while she watched the television. She turned to look at Tommy and felt the impact of the heel of a hand into her face. Eric Wilder caught Jane Rizzoli as she fell. He quickly threw her over his shoulder and closed her apartment door. He then carried her down the stairs and walked out the rear exit of the building to his waiting car in the alleyway. He duct taped Jane's hands, feet, and mouth quickly. He then laid her into the back seat and threw a blanket over her. He climbed into the car and turned it onto the side street just as Marissa came out of the bathroom.

"Jane do you need to lay down for a while? Jane? Jane?" Marissa frantically looked around the apartment. She then headed to the door where she found blood on the floor. "Oh man." There was knock on the door. "Who's there?"

"It's me Tommy?" Marissa grabbed the handle to the door and yanked it open being careful to not step in the blood. Marissa held him back before he could come inside. She stepped outside and pushed him across the hall to her door. "What are you doing?"

"Preserving as much of the crime scene as possible." Marissa said.

"What are you talking about?" Tommy asked. He headed for the door.

"Don't, he has her. Whoever you guys have been protecting her from has her." Tommy swore under his breath. He tried calling Maura, Vince, Frost, and even Frankie, but there was no answer. They were all so busy with the two incidents. Then Tommy did something he swore he would never do he called a number that was given to him by Jane.

"I need your help. Jane has been taken. No, they are all too busy with the incidents. Yes, about…," Tommy looked at Marissa. "How long has she been gone?"

"Maybe fifteen or twenty minutes." Marissa said looking at the apartment.

"Fifteen to twenty minutes. No, he wouldn't head into the city with her. He would leave. All of the major policing agencies are coming here. Eric Wilder. Yes, alright. Yes, I will meet you out front." Tommy hung up the phone. "Do you have a piece of paper?" Marissa nodded and opened her apartment door. She grabbed a nearby notebook and handed it to Tommy with a pen. Tommy wrote for five minutes and then handed it and the folded letter to Marissa. "Listen to me. I am going after Jane. I need you to get this to Vince, Frost, or Maura as soon as possible. Do not give it to my mom. Okay?" Marissa nodded as Tommy began walking away.

"Tommy, how will you find her?" Tommy stopped and turned around.

"By asking for a favor from the wrong side of the law." Tommy turned and left then. Marissa shook her head. The whole world was going crazy and her friend Jane was in trouble. She turned to get her Jacket and take her scooter to BPD.

Meanwhile, a Hyundai Santa Fe silver in color headed out of Boston on Interstate 95 toward State Road 3.

"I win Jane! I win! Now let the fun begin." Eric pulled out am iPhone and dialed a number. He let it ring five times and heard the answering click and tone. He then hung up the phone. Near the scene at the Balderas Building Emergency personnel in HAZMAT suits continued to work when they heard a high pitched whine. Suddenly, an explosion ripped through the parking garage sending emergency personnel flying including Dr. Isles, Detectives Frost, and Korsak. There was screaming from the nearby reporters and then everything went silent. 


	11. Chapter 11

**Glazed Feelings**

**Chapter 11**

**Rizzoli and Isles are the property of TNT and Tess Gerritson. I am just borrowing them for a little fun. Well, this story has definitely headed in a new direction. I had one plan, but this deeper more evil idea came to me. I think it's my alter ego writing or something. I appreciate all of the reviews and I truly appreciate each one of you. Please enjoy the new chapter. Please review as always.**

"Ohhhhh" Jane moaned loudly. Jane's head throbbed badly. Her face felt like it was literally melting off her bones the pain hurt so deeply. Jane rolled to her right feeling cold strike her side and hands. She took a deep breath and attempted to open her eyes. She was sure she had them open, but the sight of the half moon and stars reflecting back gave her pause. Did she drink too much and pass out? Suddenly, everything came rushing back to her the incidents in Boston, being home sick, Marissa watching over her, watching Maura on television, answering the door for Tommy's arrival, and ERIC! Jane sat up quickly calling out for her neighbor.

"Marissa?" Jane called out and then was wracked by a deep driving cough. When she finally recovered the detective looked around. Nothing made sense. She was lying on a thermal blanket in the middle of a snow covered glade. Tall pines rose up around the glade and the sound of trees creaking in the wind echoed over the night air. Jane looked down at herself. She was still dressed in the same outfit that the detective had put on in her home, but her police issue gun was gone. She carefully flexed her ankle area and felt the snug movement of her emergency weapon. There was a coat on the ground next to her left side and a back pack with a note pinned to it. Jane looked around her only seeing trees, snow, and the cold night sky. It was then she figured out she was freezing. Coughing again she hesitantly reached for the winter coat and placed it on her body. She checked the two inside pockets finding a roll of twine, a needle, and two matched in a small cylindrical container that was five inches in length. She then checked the two outside pockets. In the right one she found a very thick rubber band one inch in width and six inches in length. In the other a cut out newspaper article showing the explosion and three figures circled. Jane looked closer and saw there were X's placed over the three. She couldn't make out who they were but a deep fear began to take Jane for the three. She would have to wait until she had light. She stuffed the article back into her pocket. Jane heard the snap of a branch nearby. She quickly looked around. Seeing no one she reached for the back pack and note. She tore the note free and opened it.

_Jane,_

_Did you know Dante said the bottom levels of HELL were frozen ice cold? Welcome to hell. I have given you one bottle of water, two power bars, a first aid kit, and a compass. Start running because I am hunting you. When I catch you Jane I plan on having my way with you in every way before I kill you. But I am a compassionate man and believe the prey should be allowed a chance to escape._

_Eric_

_P.S. Don't attempt to go to the road. A lot of surprises wait on that path._

"Shit! Never the easy way." Jane stuffed the note in her pocket with the newspaper article. She then stood up and grabbed the compass out of the backpack. The detective hooked the compass over her neck. She then grabbed the thermal blanket and stuffed it in the backpack. She took a look around at the ground noticing the footprints which led into the glade. She decided she could follow them out. Jane took a step to follow the trail Eric left when two shots rang out striking the snow in front of her. Jane crouched down and looked ahead of her.

"_Obviously he really wants me to go the other way. Fine, I'll take the long way around."_ Jane thought. The detective turned suddenly and ran the opposite direction toward the tree line. Another shot rang out burying in the ground to Jane's left pushing her right. Jane made the tree line as a shot took the bark off the pine tree she passed. She kept running and then turned left to head in a circular pattern back toward where she was brought into the glade. The sound of another gunshot far to her right made her smile.

"_Maybe Eric's not as smart as he thinks he is." _Jane thought. She stopped and leaned against a tree. Her chest heaving and suddenly a cough threatened to take her and give away her position. She held it almost collapsing from the pain it caused to prevent it. Jane moved forward again desperate to find a road, a car, or heck a campfire. She heard a twang and a snap in the cold night air and suddenly dropped to the ground. Lying on the ground she felt the air displace above her and the solid thunk, thunk, thunk into a nearby tree. Carefully she rolled over and let her eyes adjust to the darkness. There buried in the tree directly behind her were three arrows. She closed her eyes. She had just avoided being skewered like a rabbit. She was not going to reach the road this way. Eric probably had more traps set up. Jane stood up slowly looking at the night sky through the trees.

"_God, I hope Maura is okay." _Jane thought about Maura for a moment sending all the love she could to her. She then looked at the compass in the pale light of the night. The road was to the east of her position she couldn't go that way. Eric was to the south or west of her position. She needed to head north. Jane turned taking one last look at the three arrows. Suddenly, she had an idea. She went to the tree and pulled two of the arrows free. She took off running north while stuffing the arrows in the backpack. _"I am not prey. I will not be prey. I will turn this around on Eric and be the predator. Somehow!"_ thought Jane even as perspiration of exertion and the return of her fever ran down her back.

**Fifty Miles away in Boston Maura Isles argued with the emergency room doctor…**

"I don't give a dam what you think. Bring the paperwork and I am signing myself out of here." Maura was desperately worried about Jane. She had not heard from her all day. Tommy was unreachable. Marissa also did not answer. Maura had this sinking feeling that had nothing to do with her mild concussion. The doctor returned handing Maura the forms to sign.

"Again, I must warn you that checking yourself out is not a good idea. There may be other trauma we are unaware of Doctor Isles." Maura looked over her injuries. Overall she was fine. A sprained left wrist which was wrapped, cuts and bruises, but the worst of it all was the mild concussion.

"I know the drill and I will take precautions." Angela walked in carrying a change of clothes. Maura moved to get out of the bed. The doctor continued to grumble as he walked away. Maura shook her head gently to prevent the headache that was threatening her.

"He is just trying to help Maura. I swear you're becoming more and more like Jane. I thought it was supposed to work the other way." Angela snickered after her remark to let Maura know she was being teased. Maura took a deep breath in and let it out slowly.

"I just need to check on Jane and be home with her. I'm worried because I can't reach her." Angela hugged the young woman.

"I am sure she is fine and sleeping. Go ahead and change. Then we will leave. "Angela whispered, and moved behind the curtain around Maura's bed.

"How are Korsak and Frost?" Maura asked as she changed.

"Fine, just cuts and bruises they were lucky to be far away from the blast. You were closer so received more damage." Angela said, though her voice quivered from the fear she felt when she had received the call from the hospital. Even now Angela worried about her friends on the BPD that had been hurt. Amazingly no one had been killed. The blast had looked bad on television, but had actually been a small blast. The parking garage was built in a way that forced most of the blast out the entrance area. It had been odd. Right now Homeland Security and the Federal Bureau of Investigation were swarming all over the scene. Boston Police Department had been relegated to a support position.

"Well, we can be thankful for that." The curtain pulled back and Doctor Maura Isles stood in front of Angela Rizzoli looking none the worse for wear. "Let's go." The two women walked out of the emergency room and were joined by Frost and Korsak.

"We have been told to take two days and rest." Frost said, the seriousness of his look told Maura it included Korsak and her.

"Good, you two grab takeout. Angela and I will meet you at Jane's with beer and wine." Frost smiled.

"I like how you think Doc!" Korsak said as the two men headed out to their car. Maura was able to avoid the news media and get to Angela's car.

**Twenty Five miles away on the road to Willow Brook….**

"How do you know he is taking her there?" Tommy asked Patty Doyle. The older man grimaced as he moved in the back seat of the truck.

"Because my informants tell me he has a hunting cabin there. He can hide in plain sight because even though it's between the towns of Ashby and Townsend it is remote. It has the dense forests of New England and fast running streams. Not to mention it is in the White Mountain chain. I have a few friends in Ashby who hike the trails. In summer they are fine, but winter makes them treacherous. He also told me this area gets a lot of storms due to its geographical configuration. They have snow predicted for tomorrow night. We have to find her before then." Patty Doyle watched as his driver navigated the main road. One other car followed them with four men inside. Patty wouldn't take any chances with this Eric Wilder. He had found out he was a blood thirsty killer in the true sense of the word. Eric drank the blood of his victims to gain what he thought was their life force. Patty knew he held no love for the detective, but his daughter did and that was good enough for him. He wouldn't let a blood thirsty killer break his daughter's heart.

"You know she stopped talking to Jane for months after Jane shot you. Maura blamed Jane for betraying her." Tommy said, his voice struggling to convey the anger he had at Patty for damaging the two woman's relationship.

"I would have thought you would be happy about it. After all, you wanted Maura for yourself." Patty threw back at Tommy. Tommy grimaced. How would Doyle have known about that?

"Yeah, well I was wrong. Jane is the better match for her." Tommy sighed looking out the window at the cold night. "Those two have something that I have never seen before, not even my mom and dad had it."

"I know. It's why I am doing this. Jane's going to kill you when she finds out you know." Patty Doyle looked over at Tommy.

"Jane will forgive me in time. She can't do that if she's dead." Tommy looked Doyle in the eye seeing understanding. "She helped you escape custody didn't she?" Doyle laughed and looked away.

"Kid, stick to things you know not to the fantasy world." Doyle still remembered Jane rolling him out of his room when the guard mysteriously disappeared from the door and taking him down to the morgue. She had turned him over to several of his bodyguards.

"_Why are you doing this?" Doyle asked. He saw the pain and hurt In Jane's eyes._

"_Because she needs you and I would do anything for her." Jane had responded. Then she had turned and walked away._

Strangely the camera's trained on all the areas where Jane had taken Doyle had a gap for the time he disappeared. Agent Dean had accused Jane of helping him escape. Jane had been grilled by IAD and the FBI, but they couldn't prove anything. He owed her one personally. He hated owing people, but with Rizzoli it was different because she loved his daughter. It was just like Jane said, _because she needs you and I would do anything for her."_ It was the same for Doyle and he meant to show Maura and Jane that!

**Back in northern Massachusetts…**

Jane had been running and jogging for about an hour. Her cold made her fluctuate hot and cold within her coat. Her cough was back with a vengeance and she felt a sore spot in her chest. She was dead tired. The snow made the going tough. She hadn't heard any gun shots for a while. Just ahead of her she spotted a hill. It would a hard climb in the dark, but if she could do it the detective might be able to put some extra space between her and Eric. It was cold. Jane figured it was around twenty seven degrees out. She could hear the sound of running water nearby. Jane slowed down picking her way through the thickening underbrush. She continued to walk noticing the elevation changing and the grade. She leaned against the tree coughing as quietly as she could the pain in her chest announcing its intention to stay with her. Jane pushed off the tree and kept climbing. She climbed three fourths of the way up when she saw something to her right. She quickly moved parallel along the hill until her sight confirmed what she thought she had seen. There in the side of the hill was a deep crevice with a rock overhang. If she was lucky and no animal had taken residence she had a place to rest for a short while. It was just dark enough to hide her. Jane approached the crevice carefully. She let her eyes grow accustom to the darkness and moved slowly forward. Nope, no animals and it was just deep enough to shield her from Eric's eyes. She moved forward when she heard another twang, Jane dropped again as a small load of rocks came cascading down on her. When the dust settled Jane moved slowly attempting to remove as many rocks as possible. She worked for a good fifteen minutes to free herself. Finally, she made it out. She had been lucky of sorts. She was probably covered in bruises, but she hadn't broken anything. She would have to move on Eric had anticipated her, but how?

Eric laughed softly to himself as he used the night vision glasses to track Jane on the hill. Oh, how he was enjoying this little hunting trip. Jane had been more challenging than the rest of his harem. He watched Jane begin to move along the ridge toward the top. Yes, he was going to enjoying killing her. It had to be slow so enough blood covered his hands. He needed to feel her warm vibrant energy all over him. Eric settled back into his tree tent drinking down the warm soup and coffee. He huddled into his sleeping bag. Nah, he would rest for a few hours. At first light he would track her down with no problem. After all, she was heading right toward it. When she reached it the detective would realize her folly too late! Eric chuckled as he fell asleep. On the hillside in the bitter cold and wind, Jane finally achieved the top of the hill and began running as fast as she could go.


	12. Chapter 12

**Glazed Feelings**

**Chapter 12**

**Rizzoli and Isles are the property of TNT and Tess Gerritson. I am just borrowing them for a little chaos. Thank you to all who have reviewed. I am in the middle of reviewing my students for exams at the end of the month. I am going to try an update twice a week, but if not please be patient. I have put my other fic FOG on hold until I finish Glazed Feelings. Too many serial killers to concentrate on these days. As always I am but a humble bard, please review.**

"I don't know Korsak. When we arrived there was blood on the floor." Maura said. She was desperately worried. Maura and Angela had found Jane's apartment open upon arrival and empty. Once the blood had been found, they had called Crowe and notified Cavanaugh. CSU had come and gone. They had very little evidence to go on; five sets of fingerprints, the blood on the floor, and nothing else. Marissa and Tommy were still missing. It was now four in the morning and Korsak, Frost, Angela, and Maura sat in Jane's living room trying to piece together what they knew. The beer and wine still sat in the refrigerator and the Thai food on the counter. "We have to find her. She could relapse with her pneumonia and…" Maura left it unsaid, but everyone knew what she meant.

"We will find her. Okay, what do we know?" Korsak said.

"We know you and Frankie left Jane this morning after the two incidents. She was here and fine. Maura asked Marissa to keep an eye on Jane until Tommy could arrive. We know Marissa said yes. Somewhere in between your departure and arrival, Marissa was here with Jane. Did Tommy ever arrive? If he did where is he? Where is Marissa?" Frost said looking at the timeline they had reconstructed on paper. Suddenly, there was a knock on the door. Frost and Korsak drew their guns and motioned for Angela and Maura to hide behind the corner. The knock came again.

"Jane? Jane its Marissa are you there?" Frost yanked the door open and pulled Marissa inside. "What the hell?" Korsak pounced into the hall making sure no one was holding Marissa at gun point.

"Clear." Korsak called to Frost. Frost let Marissa go. Suddenly she was bombarded with questions from all sides.

"Where have you been?" "Where is Jane?" "Why is there blood on the floor?" "What is Tommy doing?" "Where is Tommy?" Angela, Korsak, and Frost all shouted at once. Suddenly a loud whistle interrupted everyone.

"Enough! Marissa, sit down on the couch for a moment. Angela, bring the food into the living room. Frost, grab some water for Marissa, a wine for me, and a couple of beers for you and Korsak. Korsak, stop pacing. We will talk to Marissa like civilized adults not an out of control crowd." Maura said, though everyone could see her worry for Jane in her eyes. Once peace had been restored and food and drinks distributed Maura began slowly questioning Marissa.

"Where is Jane?" Maura asked taking hold of the young woman's hands and catching her eyes.

"I don't know. I came over to the apartment like you asked. Jane had taken her medicine without food and it was making her nauseous. So I made her breakfast. She was watching the incidents on the television when she saw you. She got up to leave, but I did as you told me and relayed the message. She was not happy about being grounded." Maura smirked at this, so like Jane. She always wanted to be in the thick of things. "She said she would stay put. She kept watching the news. I had to go to the restroom. When I came out she was gone, there was blood by the door. All I could think of was whoever you all have been protecting her from had gotten to her." Maura's eyes fell for a moment as her heart tightened in fear. So Eric had her.

"Where have you been?" Frost asked quietly setting aside his food.

"Tommy asked me to deliver a message to you, Korsak, or Maura. I was at BPD trying to get it into your hands, but everyone is so on edge they had me waiting all this time. Then when I wouldn't give it to a Detective Ainsley he said I would have to wait then. I finally got tired of waiting. I knew you would all come back here eventually. I kind of hoped I would find Jane here. That she had stepped out and it was all a big mistake." Marissa said softly, her eyes falling to the floor.

"Do you have the message from Tommy?" Maura asked. Marissa nodded reaching into her coat pocket and pulling out the notebook paper Tommy had scratched the note onto before he had left.

_Maura,_

_Eric has Jane. I have called a mutual acquaintance that has the ability to get things done no matter how messy or legal. He knows where Eric has Jane. Maura, he and I are going to get Jane. But just so you know Jane is being held on Eric's cabin between the towns of Ashby and Townsend. I won't fail you Maura. We will get Jane back. You can reach us at this number. 617-201-****._

_Tommy_

Maura reread it and then handed it to Korsak. She pulled out her phone and dialed the number. A gruff voice answer, "Hello?"

"This is Maura. Put Paddy on." Maura could hear the phone changing hands and then the voice she didn't want to really hear came on.

"Hello Maura." The deep rough voice of Paddy Doyle echoed through the line.

"Where is she?" Maura asked softly. Paddy gave Maura directions which she relayed to Frost.

"Maura, we don't know if she is alive yet. One of my friends has the cabin under surveillance until we arrive, but there has been no movement in or out. We think…we think…" Paddy couldn't say it. He didn't want to hurt his daughter more.

"You think what?" Maura asked desperately the fear now making her voice tremble.

"We think Eric is hunting her in the forest between Ashby and Townsend. My friend says there have been four woman's bodies discovered in the forest here in the last year. They have suspected Eric for a while, but they have had no proof to pursue him." Maura took a deep breath and let it out slowly.

"We will be heading your way in the hour. Is there anything you need to help?" Maura said, the fear being replaced with righteous anger. She would stop Eric if it was the last thing she did. He was not going to claim Jane as another victim and get away with it.

"No, but I will let you know that Eric will not be coming back alive. Talk to you soon." Paddy hung up on Maura. Maura closed the phone.

"Eric does have Jane. I need to make some phone calls. Paddy and Tommy are after him. Seems he has some help. You have the location we are to meet him?" Frost nodded. After he had gotten the directions he had opened a drawer he knew Jane kept maps in and began looking for the location.

"Here it is, deep inside the forests near Willow Brook State Park. I have been there before. I hiked with friends this area. It's a beautiful area, but can be hard to locate someone in summer. We may have an advantage if we use helicopters since it is winter." Frost said as he studied the map.

"There is no way the Lieutenant is going to authorize helicopters for a search. Not when they are looking for the terrorists here in Boston after the gassing of those civilians and the explosion." Korsak said as he looked at the map and then at Maura.

"Korsak, call Cavanaugh. Tell him we have some leads on Jane. Tell him we are going to check them out. Frost, we are going to need heavy winter clothes. Don't you have a friend who owns that large chain of sporting goods stores?" Frost nodded. "Call him up; tell him what we need and why we need it. Angela, I need you to stay here and hold down the fort. I have a few phone calls to make." Maura stepped into the kitchen even as Frost and Korsak made their calls. There was no way Jane was going to become a victim again. Not if Maura had anything to do with it.

**In the Town of Ashby…**

"We are here." Paddy pulled up to the local precinct and stepped out. He motioned to his men to wait. "Are you going to come inside?" Paddy asked Tommy. Tommy nodded. They entered the police station and Paddy waved to a woman in the back. Sheriff White stepped out and embraced Paddy. The woman had a medium, muscular build, blonde hair, blue eyes, and wicked handshake.

"It has been a while Mr. Smith. I have missed you." She kissed Paddy on the cheek and then let him go. "I don't believe I know you?" She addressed Tommy.

"Tommy, Tommy Rizzoli." She nodded.

"Sheriff Madison White at your service. We will find your sister." The sheriff turned back to Paddy.

"We have the cabin under surveillance. Nothing yet. I have talked to my counterpart in Townsend and they say they found a Silver Hyundai Santa Fe parked off the road near one of the secluded glades. They have had it towed and were informed it could be rigged for bombs. Upon search of the car they found it was registered to Eric Leonard. They found several dark black hairs in the back seat with duct tape nearby. We believe they belong to Detective Rizzoli. The glade has not been checked. There were problems getting to it." Sheriff White said angrily.

"What kind of problems?" Paddy asked.

"It seems this Eric fellow likes games. He set up booby traps along the road area to prevent anyone from coming to look, two of the officers investigating were injured by small explosives." Sheriff White responded.

"What if it's not to come looking, but maybe he didn't want someone escaping?" Tommy's voice said thoughtfully. The sheriff looked at Tommy and nodded.

"Yeah, that would make sense. Anyway, this trip is by snow mobile and foot. It is the only way in there." Sheriff White said as she spoke to the two men. They nodded.

"Let's get going. Jane doesn't have much time. Oh, there is one more thing. Jane was very ill with pneumonia before she was taken. She was on the road to recovery, but this might have caused a relapse. She will need medical attention." Tommy said, making sure they understood how desperate the situation was really. Sheriff White nodded and spoke to one of her deputy's.

"Okay, let's go gentlemen. We have a long way to go and storm that is due to arrive after dark. If we haven't gotten to her by then we will have to wait until the storm is over to find her." The sheriff said as she grabbed her coat and two of the deputy's accompanied her. Outside they all loaded up and headed to the location where snowmobiles awaited.

"I'm worried we won't reach her in time." Tommy said softly. Paddy looked over as they were being driven away.

"We will get to her in time. Your sister is one smart cookie. She knows how to handle herself. She will hold out until we get there." Paddy said as he held Tommy's eyes. Tommy looked out the window at the rising sun and nodded. He hoped Paddy was right. _"Hold on Sis, I'm coming. I promise I am coming. I won't let you down this time."_ Tommy thought as he looked out at the bleak, snow covered forest that surrounded him.

**Eric's hunting fields…**

Just as the sun began to change the darken night to a light grey Jane fell forward tripping over a branch hidden beneath the snow line. The cold snow seemed almost comforting to her exhausted body causing her to momentarily relax. Exhaustion continued to play at the corners of her mind and body trying to get her to give in and sleep. The detective knew if she stopped in the open she was done for so she pulled herself unsteadily to her feet knowing she had to keep moving. Jane looked around noticing this area of the forest had a great many tracks from previous trips either by Eric, hunters, or winter hikers. Maybe she could use that to her advantage and gain some desperate rest. She began to move slowly forward while her eyes hunted the surrounding area. It was a few moments later when she found what she was looking for in the way of a briar patch off to her left. The tracks passed close to it and around it so Jane decided to take advantage of it. She slowly made her way over walking sideways being careful to fit her feet into previous tracks. As she moved around the patch she noticed it was extremely thick and difficult to see into it. It was a perfect place to hide herself. Finally, she found a small opening made by deer or other animals. Jane took off the backpack and slid it through the opening. She followed being careful where she put her hands. As she moved deeper inside she attempted to obscure the opening behind her. Once deep inside the briar patch she found an area where animals had lain creating an open area unseen by the outside. Jane pulled out the thermal blanket laying half on the ground. She pulled out the bottle of water and a power bar. She ate slowly chewing until the power bar was emulsified enough with a sip of water to be swallowed. Jane knew she was in trouble. Her cough was bad enough, but she was having trouble swallowing and her throat felt like raw meat and sandpaper combined. It hurt enough to bring tears to the detective. The fever that she had earlier now raged causing her to be paranoid at any little sound. She needed this to end soon. She didn't think she could make it another night in the shape she was right now

"_Maura, wherever you are I need your help. Please find me. I'm not sure I can do this on my own this time."_ Jane thought to herself. Finishing the bottle of water Jane packed it half way with snow. She then opened the other bottle carefully dumping half of the water into the one with snow. This effectively melted the snow in the other bottle except for a small amount. She then added snow to the last bottle. At least she would still have water. She put both back into the backpack. She hoped that Eric didn't find her little surprise she had set up with the rubber band, one arrow, and twine. She needed him to walk into it and have him at a disadvantage. She would just have to wait and see now. Jane laid down on half of the thermal blanket. She then pulled the other half up over her creating a cocoon. Between the blanket and her coat she felt warm finally. She could sleep for a short while and then try again to get away. Hopefully, she was hidden enough to be safe. Her last thoughts as she dropped off were of Maura holding Jane in her arms. If Jane concentrated really hard she could almost smell Maura's flowery shampoo and feel the touch of her hair. Those warm lips kissing her forehead and the gentle soft voice mixed with sleep telling her to rest, that everything would be okay.

**Eric's camp…**

Eric had broken down his camp as the sun rose. A fine breakfast of bacon, eggs, toast, and coffee gave him energy for what lay ahead. He was excited. Patiently he checked his gear. The rifle was fully loaded and extra ammunition in the backpack. The dart gun was on safety. The quarrels were ready in the backpack fully loaded with a special sedative. After all, it wouldn't do to have Jane waking up as the first cut to her chest was made or maybe it would. Eric wondered what it would be like to have Jane writhing below him while her blood pumped out across his hands. Maybe for the fine detective he wouldn't tranquilizer her at first. Hmm, he would have to think about that.

Eric began his pursuit. He figured Jane hadn't gotten far in the snow and darkness. Eric couldn't have been more wrong. Jane had actually covered a greater distance than he thought. As Eric began to track Jane the winds picked up beginning to blow the snow causing her trail to be obscured. Eric swore softly, he needed to find her before her trail was completely gone. Eric began to move faster following the trail the good detective left.


	13. Chapter 13

**Glazed Feelings**

**Part 13**

**Rizzoli and Isles are the property of TNT and Tess Gerritson. I am just borrowing them to produce some angst. Sorry this has taken so long to post, real busy these days. Umm, this was a hard chapter. Let me know what you think. There are a few more chapters. Hope you enjoy.**

"Damn her! How could she have moved this quickly over the landscape when she is sick?" Eric moved quickly over the snow covered landscape. The terrain was rough with heavy forest, rising and falling with deep ravines and rivers. Jane's footprints had disappeared long ago and Eric was becoming quite frustrated. Every once in a while he would catch a sign of her passing in a broken limb, bark broken free from a tree, or a piece of cloth that got caught from her coat and tore off. Now he figured he was getting close, but as he rounded a corner near a rock outcropping he never felt the pull on his boot from the twine Jane had set. He heard the twang a little too late and soon felt the tip and then shaft of an arrow bury deep into his right shoulder. Eric screamed in pain, the scream echoing across the snowy forest. Jane woke with a start hearing the sound of painful screaming.

"Fuck" Jane said softly realizing she had slept longer than she should have. Her head throbbed as much as her chest. She continued to hear screaming though it was softer now. "Bet that hurt." She thought with a smirk as she attempted to rise. Eric was closer than she expected. She needed to get moving. She attempted to move and almost let loose a deep throated cough. She was able to stifle it, but just barely. She rubbed her legs to get the blood flowing and then stood. Not four feet away lay a doe and two fawns watching her. Jane had never heard them enter or lay near her. Now they watched her cautiously, but in a relaxed state. "Sorry to take you bed. I'll just be moving on," Jane said softly. The doe watched a few more minutes and then lowered her head. Jane began hunting around the edges of the briar patch to see if there was a better way out. She soon found a way that would mask her movements. Jane carefully picked her way out of the briar patch moving toward the sound of running water. She had come out onto a rocky and uneven surface. She knew she needed to stay away from the open fields where her tracks could be seen. Here toward the east side of the briar patch Jane could slip down the side of the hill without being noticed due to the rocky jagged incline. She had hoped there would be another way out and had been rewarded for her efforts. The detective checked her compass and then began picking her way over the rocks carefully making good time still heading north.

"JANE! I KNOW YOU'RE OUT THERE! I WILL CATCH YOU!" Eric's voice echoed through the forest. "YOU WILL NOT BEAT ME!" The last was said in ragged pain laced with desperation.

"Yeah right asshole! I already have!" Jane moved fast as she could. She figured that the injury would slow Eric down at least an hour. She could put more distance between him and her. She thought about Maura as she moved. She had finally gotten their relationship back to somewhat normal balance and this had happened. She missed her soft touch and gentle kisses. She so wished she could be cuddled up on the couch with her right now warm and safe. If she got out of this she would not back talk Maura again. She would follow all her directions. She felt terrible. It was taking all the energy she had to stay standing up and hold the coughs in that attempted to rack her flesh. Jane figured she had been moving an hour when she came to the edge of a small fall area. The water was flowing at a steady rate, but she figured she could pick her way across carefully moving along the water's edge to hide her tracks. She carefully placed each foot making sure she didn't slip. The first rush of water over her boots and calf shocked her. If Jane was still asleep in any way the cold water woke her total body up. Her next step caused her to lose her footing and pitch forward as the current began to push against her legs. Jane shoved her hands outward submerging them in the running water. She was able to recover though before she was totally submerged in the water. Jane took a deep breath and pushed herself back up water pouring off the arms of her coat. The wind chose that moment to send a gust her way pitching her to the right. She caught herself shifting the center of her weight preventing herself from pitching over the falls. Now her legs and arms were totally soaked, but the core of her body was dry. Three more steps and she was on the other side. She moved along the river as her body shivered from the cold. _"I'm in real trouble. I need to get out of these woods now."_ Jane thought as she ran as fast as she could along the edge of the river.

Not far away Eric worked on the arrow. He had started the fire and set a stick into it to burn the tip. He then placed the leather sheaf of his hunting knife between his teeth. He closed his eyes and took two deep breaths and gritted his teeth on the leather. He then broke the end of the arrows shaft off with his other hand causing his shoulder to throb with excruciating pain. Once he caught his breath he threw the feathered end of the arrow down. Now came the hardest part. He placed the broken end of the shaft against the tree. He looked forward, took a deep breath, and pushed backwards as hard as he could shoving the shaft out the other side of his should. The scream that issued from Eric was a wild animalistic sound. Eric Leonard had never felt such pain before in his life. Multiple colors danced in front of his eyes as the pain threatened to cause him to lose consciousness. "No, I will not pass out. I will beat her." Eric whispered raggedly. He sat back up grasping the front of the shaft which poked out of his shoulder. "I will win Jane!" Eric said as he pulled hard removing the shaft from his shoulder. Another loud scream issued from Eric's mouth as he pitched forward falling to the ground. Eric cried from the pain, but knew he didn't have the luxury of passing out. He had to finish and get after Jane. He removed the coat now and pulled back his shirt. He decided cauterizing the wound closed was not a good idea. He needed to get to Jane. He wrapped the wound, placed his shirt and coat back on. As quick as he could he pulled free a little hidden surprise for Jane from his back pack. He looked at the two hand grenades. He wouldn't kill her with them, but he was going to make sure she felt the same pain he did. Carefully placing them in the special pocket of his back pack Eric moved off into the forest. He was going to make Detective Rizzoli feel unimaginable pain when he caught her.

**Ten miles away on snowmobiles…**

"Yeah, Yeah. I understand." Sheriff White clicked off her the radio receiver in her helmet and switched to local channels so she could talk to Tommy and Doyle. "They've spotted smoke from a campfire ahead about ten miles. We haven't had anyone register for hunting and nothing is in season right now. So we believe it is either Eric or Jane. At least we are hopeful."

"What about Maura? Has anyone heard from her?" Doyle asked through the microphone.

"Yes, her ETA is 20 minutes. She is going to be able to help a great deal. Seems her mother pulled some strings. They have three helicopters from a special shipping business. But they are going to have to move quickly once here. The storm has slowed, but will arrive about nine tonight. "Sheriff White said. Doyle looked at the time register on the dash of the snowmobile. It was registering three forty-five. They didn't have much time. On top of that dark fell about six in the evening. Even though they could keep searching after dark it would make it much harder.

"Doyle, we have to find her. She won't last the night. Jane illness will kill her if Eric doesn't." Tommy was becoming agitated. Jane had limited time even he knew it. He was not going to fail her, not this time. He had promised her after he got out that he would go straight and not make dumb mistakes. He almost blew it with Maura. Jane's anger over the pass he had made at Maura had almost put a defining wedge between his sister and him. Maura in the end had been the _"better man" _so to speak and told him she couldn't endanger her relationship with Jane.

"We will get to her Tommy." Doyle said as he watched the sheriff and two deputy's pull to a stop near a wooded area. The two deputies' got off their snowmobiles and headed into the woods. Sheriff White waited for Doyle and Tommy to stop their machines. Doyle's bodyguards joined moments later.

"Sheriff, you better come here and see this. It's not good." One of the deputies' radioed. Doyle, Tommy, and Sheriff White moved into the wood. They had discovered Eric's campsite. The bloody arrow lay on the ground. There were blood pools in two places including blood dripping down a nearby tree. The fire was still going, but had burned low. There was also a definite blood trail though Eric probably didn't realize it.

"This is Sheriff White to dispatch. Let the state police know we have a possible murder site. "While the sheriff waited for a response Tommy was studying the tracks leading away from the campsite and Doyle was studying the campsite.

"Sheriff? This isn't Jane's blood." Tommy yelled as he looked at the foot prints and then moved forward to look at a bloody hand print on a tree. Sheriff White came up behind Tommy.

"How do you know?" Sheriff White said her voice stern in nature.

"See the foot prints. They are larger like a mans and see the handprint? It's definitely too large for Jane's hand. "Sheriff White moved around Tommy looking at the prints and then into the distance where they disappeared. Deputy Lacy came over and cleared her throat.

"Sheriff, Johns and I figure he is only an hour or two ahead of us on foot. We can't get the snowmobiles through the wooded area. We can track them though." Sheriff White looked at Deputy Lacy and then back at Tommy.

"Get the packs. Have a team get out here to collect samples from this site. The state police will take two hours to get here. Detective Rizzoli doesn't have much time and from the looks of it neither does Eric."

**Ten minutes from Willard Park area…**

"Ashby dispatch to Chopper one, Over." Maura was on the edge of the seat watching the view out the side window when the call came in to the helicopter they were riding in toward Ashby.

"This is chopper one, we read you." The pilot replied. Maura listened as Korsak placed a hand on her shoulder.

"Be advised that Sheriff White believes they have picked up Eric Leonard's trail. They believe they are an hour to two hours behind him. Over." Hope began to blossom in Maura again. _"Hang in there Jane."_ Maura thought.

"Roger, Chopper one to dispatch please radio coordinates and we will rendezvous with Sheriff White." The pilot replied. Dispatch gave the coordinates and then the radio went silent.

"Greg, can you find them in this forest?" Maura called over the radio to the pilot Greg Winters.

"Yes, look down. See how the trees have no foliage. If this was summer, or fall we would have a harder time. But it's winter. I promise Maura. We will find her." Greg said as he scanned the horizon turning northwest toward the coordinates. Greg radioed to the other two copters which turned and followed. One of the copters held a full contingent of medical personnel including Doctor Jerry. The other one held Frost, Frankie, and. Cavanaugh allowed them to go when he got a call from the Governor about sparing a few people for a Hero Officer's rescue. Jane's mother Constance had made that call personally. "Maura, look there. See the snowmobiles from the Sheriffs crew." Indeed it was the snow mobiles. Greg hovered over the nearby snowmobiles until he saw a man come out of the forest and point north. Greg acknowledged and headed in that direction.

"Where are we Greg?" Maura asked. The Sheriff's group was already crossing the stream Jane had crossed earlier. They were making good time though Maura could tell that a couple of them were straggling behind.

"Just northeast of the position the Sheriff radioed earlier. " Maura looked at the map Korsak handed her and pointed to a spot on the map.

"Radio Sheriff White to head upstream and we will make a circle east. Maybe we can see something else. Have Chopper two head west. Keep chopper three with us." Maura told Greg. Korsak nodded and looked out the side window. The group in the two choppers began studying the ground.

"UGH!" Jane fell hard. She could no longer feel her arms or her legs. She began coughing uncontrollably hard her whole frame shaking. She pulled herself forward on hands and knees the nearby gurgling of the stream beckoning to her parched body. Jane crawled over the black river rock; she put her hand in the water pulling a drink up to her lips. She drank her fill noticing her reflection in the water. Her face was covered with scratches and cuts, leaves and small sticks decorated her hair, but the worse was the sweat she could see and feel beading over her forehead. She rolled on her back and pulled the backpack around. She closed her eyes for a second resting, trying to regain some strength. Distantly she heard the sound of thrumming and thought it was an odd sound for so far out. She looked up over head, but saw nothing. She pulled herself up and opened the pack grabbing the energy bar. She attempted to tear the wrapper open, but didn't have the strength in her hands. She raised it to her lips pulling and tearing until she got it open. Jane ate not tasting anything barely aware of what was in her mouth. Just as she dipped her hand into the stream a bullet ricocheted off the nearby rock. Jane looked below her. She could just make out Eric Leonard.

"Gotcha Jane!" Eric yelled laughing.

"Not yet you haven't." Jane yelled back and took off running over the rocks up stream. Eric leveled the gun taking careful aim at the running detective. The shot rang out across the wooded area as Eric watched in the distance as Jane fell into stream.

"Yes, I do Bitch!" Eric whispered to himself. Quickly he shouldered the gun picking his way to where he last saw Jane.

Downstream Sheriff White held up a hand halting everyone's movement. She had heard the first shot ring out. Now as the group listened a second shot rang out much closer than the first. Tommy took off running up stream.

"Tommy, wait. Tommy! Damnit!" Sheriff White said as the rest of the group went to follow. Doyle close on Tommy's heals. "This is Sheriff White to Chopper one, over. We have shots fired upstream of our coordinates." Sheriff White relayed the GPS coordinates as they moved up stream. Just as they topped the next rise they could see someone off in the distance. Sheriff White pulled out her binoculars scanning the horizon. "Yep, it's Eric Leonard I think. Chopper one, a mile ahead of us I believe is Eric Leonard, over.

"Sheriff! I think you better look to the left in the water." Deputy Lacy said as she pointed. Sheriff White turned with her binoculars.

"Damn! Chopper one; we have a body in the water. I repeat we have a body in the water a mile ahead, over." Sheriff White heard the affirmative and took off. "Come on." The entire group took off following Doyle and Tommy. In the distance Sheriff White could see Tommy half way across to where they were headed. He was going to get there first and she prayed that he could handle himself.

"Maura, you have to prepare yourself." Korsak was saying into his microphone. Chopper one turned hard heading back toward where the Sheriff's group was located.

"NO! She is alive. Don't even think that Korsak. She is alive and we are going to make it in time! Do you understand me?" Maura said gripping the man's arms. "We will not fail her. Jane has never failed us and we are not going to let her down. Do you understand?" Korsak looked into Maura's eyes seeing a wild look he had never seen before. He nodded and took her hand gripping it.

"Five minutes Maura and Korsak." Greg responded. Maura watched out the side of the helicopter. What she saw as they came around the rise made her heart freeze cold.

Tommy ran like he had never run before. Inside he chanted to himself, _I will not fail you. I will save you. I will not fail you again."_ The ground slipped below him as he grabbed for purchase over the slippery rocks. It was then he noticed he had to climb. The view they had was from the top of a ridge so Tommy had not seen that Jane was on the next ridge. He began climbing. Desperate to get to his sister. Doyle wasn't far behind. He was winded badly and for a man his age this was quite an ordeal, but he had his daughter's needs to consider. Two of his bodyguards came even.

"Go, help Tommy. Make sure Eric Leonard does not hurt Jane." The two men though burly in nature were younger and moved faster.

Eric found Jane floating right side up almost fully submerged into the water except her head which was caught between two rocks. Eric let out a yell of glee shucking off the gun and back pack. He grabbed the hunting knife from his side and placed it into his right hand. He then raced into the water grabbing hold of Rizzoli by her hair and dragging her out. Once on land he kicked Jane in the head. She never moved. He stripped off her coat, then her shirt and bra. He went to the pack and grabbed the detective's handcuffs placing both of them on Jane's wrists. He then grabbed her and hoisted her up pinning her naked form to a tree. He then took the knife in his left hand. He slapped Jane on the face waking her.

"Wakey, Wakey Jane!" Eric chuckled with glee as Jane began coming around. Jane's head throbbed hard. She finally opened her eyes to see herself pinned to a tree with Eric in front of her. "Yes, Yes! I win. You're mine now Jane. Don't worry though," he said as he drew close. He caressed her gently with the tip of the hunting knife running it down her neck over her breasts making a quick flick drawing blood and then down along her ribs to her abdomen. "You don't have long to live. I plan on making you hurt first though." Eric said as he flicked the knife against her rib cage cutting her. The blood ran down over Jane's pants dripping to the ground.

"NO!" Jane attempted to squirm but the energy had finally given out on her. Her illness was claiming her as fast as Eric was now taking her. She tried one last time attempting to kick forward. Eric batted her legs away pinning her lower half to the tree.

"You lose Jane! No one to rescue you. No one to help the poor lonely detective." Eric made another cut to the underside of Jane's arm this one deeper. Jane hissed as tears began to flow down her cheeks. He leaned in licking up the blood. When he pulled away his face was covered in Jane's blood. "So Sweet! How sweet are you Jane? Let's find out." Eric removed Jane's pants to where they hung around her ankles. "Let's see how sweet you really are Jane!" Eric flicked the knife on her hip causing more blood to run down her legs. Adrenalin infused him spurring him to take more. He was just about to place his lips over the cut on her hip when he was struck from the side by Tommy Rizzoli.

This is what Maura saw as she came around the bend. Jane pinned to the tree blood dripping from her body, Tommy Rizzoli rolling and fighting someone on the edge of the river line, Doyle's two bodyguards topping the rise with Doyle, and Sheriff White's group just arriving at the base of the ridge.

"Nooooo! Greg, find a place to set down quickly! Oh God, please Greg." Maura was at the door of the helicopter even as it hovered off the ground. Korsak opened it and jumped out ten seconds after Maura. The medical examiner was across the river area just as the sheriff came over the rise. She made it to in front of Jane even as she watched Tommy Rizzoli fight with Eric Leonard.

"Damn you! You hurt her." Tommy beat Eric Leonard as hard as he could.

"What is she your tart too? You like sharing her with that woman medical examiner? Do you participate?" Tommy shoved Eric under the water holding him under.

"You will never hurt her again. I will not allow it." Tommy continued to hold him under until Doyle's men grabbed him and pulled him off Eric.

"No son. You don't want to do that. You need to be with your sister now. We will take care of the trash." One of Doyle's bodyguards said. Tommy looked at him and then at Eric who was sputtering and choking. He then looked toward shore where Doyle was lifting Jane off the branch of the tree she had been pinned too. Frankie came barreling across toward Eric when Doyle's bodyguard stepped in the way. "We've got him. I promise he won't bother your sister again." It was all Frankie could do not to move Doyle's goon. Frost grabbed hold of him and pulled him toward Jane.

"Let them have him. Come on, Jane needs you now." Frost said nervously looking toward Doyle's goon. Frankie let go of some of his anger changing the focus of all his adrenalin.

On shore Maura grabbed for Jane's arms when her hands were caught and pulled away. She looked to her side to find Doyle pulling her back and then reaching forward. He lifted Jane up off the branch Eric had hung her over. The detective's body fell forward even as Doctor Jerry and the medical crew arrived. Doyle laid Jane on the stretcher as Jerry began working on her. Jane's eyes fluttered open.

"Didn't I tell you to stay inside?" Jerry said as Jane's eyes tracked to him. Jane smiled and her eyes looked around him.

"Maura?" Jane whispered. Maura was there in a second. "I'm here. I'm here." Maura was at her side. Maura slipped her hand into Jane's and kissed her head.

"We have to transport now. Her body temp is very low. She is already showing signs of hypothermia and her lungs are filling with fluid." Maura looked at the worry in Jerry's brow. She looked back down at Jane.

"Hey, stick around. I intend to marry you one day soon." Maura whispered. Jane smiled.

"Couldn't think of anywhere else I'd rather be Maura Isles." Jane slid into unconsciousness.

"Let's go." Jane's stretcher was placed on the medical chopper. Maura grabbed hold of Tommy as they headed toward the medical chopper. Frost and Korsak were already on board with Doyle and Sheriff White on the other helicopter.

"What about him?" One of the medic's asked pointing at Eric Leonard. The medic never got his answer as the doors to the helicopter closed and then it lifted off. Eric Leonard was left with four of Doyle's bodyguards and two deputy sheriffs.


	14. Chapter 14

**Glazed Feelings **

**Chapter 14**

**Rizzoli and Isles are the property of TNT and Tess Gerritson. I am just borrowing them for a little angst. I do promise to return them.** **I thought the last chapter was hard. I was wrong. This one was harder because of the research I had to do for it. Let's just say the grenades haven't been used yet. Enjoy.**

"So the question is, what do we do with you?" Carlo, one of Doyles men said as they watched two of the helicopters fly off. The third was given instructions to land in the nearby field and wait. Johns and Lacy had strict orders from their boss to not interfere. They were also told to leave the area.

"We will meet you at the chopper. Don't be long. The winds are already picking up." Lacy called to Doyles men as she and Johns walked away.

"Wait, you can't leave me here. You have to arrest me. Your officers of the law." Eric yelled at the retreating deputies. "Hey, come back here."

"Lacy? You sure this is the right thing to do?" Johns asked as he glanced back to where Eric Leonard was being picked up by two of Doyles men.

"YES! He has killed too many. I know we are suppose to uphold the law, but the law Johns could never bring the victims peace. Those families need to know their daughters were avenged properly. Detective Rizzoli needs to know she can sleep without keeping one eye open." Johns thought about it as they walked back to the chopper listening to Eric Leonards screams. He had killed over fourteen women. They were almost sure of it from what they had found in the cabin. All the missing over the years had accidentally blundered into his path and he had taken advantage of it. The law could never punish him appropriately. Maybe Doyles men could. Johns and Lacy got into the waiting helicopter.

"You can't break me. I have won against Rizzoli. No matter what I have won." Doyle's men grabbed Eric wrenching his arms behind his back. Eric screamed as sharp agonizing pain shot through his shoulder. Carlo, the leader of Doyles men stepped forward. He then grabbed Eric's shoulder where the arrow had entered and began pushing his thumb into the wound while the other two men held him up. Eric screams echoed across the river area. When Carlo stopped Eric fell forward held up only by the strength of the two men. Aidan stepped forward next beating Eric over the head and face causing cuts to open up and blood to darken the snow a deep crimson red. Sean and Brian held Eric fast as Carlo took over delivering deadly punches to the man's chest, abdomen, and torso area. When done they threw Eric down on top of his back pack. Eric's knees fell heavy into the rocks that surrounded the river. Eric could barely see his eyes were swelling shut, his nose and cheek bones were broken, and everything inside hurt.

"Patrick Doyle told us to tell you before you died that you messed with the wrong woman. Detective Rizzoli is under his protection. You hurt her, you hurt him. Your life is forfeit." Aidan began walking toward Eric. Eric reached into the secret pocket grabbing a grenade.

"Back off! Back off or I pull the pin!" Eric yelled as he lay on his back barely able to see the four shadows in front of him. Suddenly, the shape stopped and he heard laughing. Uproarious, deep laughter. "Stop laughing! I am warning you, stop laughing!"

"Boy, you are some stupid Fuck if you think we would forget about searching your pack and finding those two little firecrackers." Eric stared confused until he pulled his hand that clutched the grenade closer. His entire countenance fell. He held in his hand a black river rock not the hand grenade he thought he had. Aidan came over grabbing the nearby handcuffs that had been removed from Detective Rizzoli and discarded on the ground. He then cuffed Eric in the front.

"No, no! I can give you lots of money. Just help me out of here and I can give you money beyond your belief." Aidan signalled the two large men to his right and had them pin Eric on the tree Jane had been on. "You don't understand what your doing! I am Eric Leonard! You cannot do this to me." Eric yelled.

"Now Eric, lets talk about what kind of man you are?" Eric's eyes grew wide as Aidan came toward him with the hunting knife he used on Jane.

"Brrrrrr."John's stepped out of the helicopter to stretch his legs. It had been an hour since Lacy and he had left Doyle's men. There wasn't any sign of them yet. He could hear screams coming out of the wood nearby that he could only classify as agony. Suddenly, a large explosion rocked the area from where Eric Leonard and Doyles men were located. Johns, Lacy and the pilot watched the fireball rise and the smoke continue. A second explosion rocked the area causing Lacy to open the side door of the helicopter and jump out.

"Hmmm, report to dispatch that Eric Leonard blew himself up." Lacy told John's as she watched Doyles men walk out of the forest. The door to the helicopter opened and the four men got inside. Lacy looked at one of Doyles men with a questioning look.

"Seems he fell to pieces trying to confess his sins. He won't bother anyone anymore." Doyles lead man said. Lacy nodded as the helicopter lifted off.

Meanwhile overhead as Chopper one and three made their way to Boston General.

"Maura, hand me the IV bag." Doctor Jerry set up another IV bag. He listened to Jane's lungs. The heavy sound of labored breathing was clearly evident. "Notify Boston General that we have Eratic pulse and blood pressure. Patient has severe pneumonia, hypothermia, and a minor gun shot wound to the left shoulder. There is definite signs of a pleural effusion . Tell Doctor Palmer to have the appropriate drugs on hand. We may need to perform a Thoracentesis when we arrive." Doctor Jerry said as the copter flew. Jerry now turned his attention to the gun shot and knife wounds on Jane's body. "Maura, I know your Jane's medical power of attorney. I need to lay this out clearly. Jane's going to need a Thoracentesis when we arrived to remove the fluid on her lungs. It's pushing against her heart and chest cavity causing her to be unable to breath. I will begin treatment with medication right after the procedure to make sure the fluid doesn't rebuild. Her body is already being stressed by the hypothermia and the loss of blood. We may need to transfuse her when we get to thehospital. I already know BPD keeps a ready supply on hand and have requisition her blood type to be waiting. On top of it she has minor frostbite, which is amazing considering how exposed she has been to the elements. My concern now is to stabilize her and begin treatment with antibiotics." Maura watched what Jerry was saying and saw he was holding something back.

"What are you not saying Jerry?" Maura leaned away from where Tommy rested.

"It's nothing. I may be totally wrong." Jerry said going back to his examination of Jane. Maura grabbed Jerry's arm. Jerry winced at Maura's grip.

"What are you not telling me?" Maura needed the plain truth from her friend.

"There are indications, but it's possible they are symptoms of her other injuries, that Jane may have Sepsis." Jerry said softly through the helicopter microphone. Maura's mind immediately began rolling through what she knew of Sepsis. Sepsis is a bacterial infection that can begin anywhere within the body. Symptoms are similar to those of pneumonia and are life threatening. Maura leaned back running her hands over her face and thinking. Jane's immune system had been compromised for weeks and now the added stress of the hypothermia and gun shot wound could have sent it over the edge. Maura sat back up determination grabbing hold of her heart.

"What do you need? Anything, I will get it." Maura fervently responded. Jerry shook his head.

"Just time. We need time. Jane needs to fight hard. In ways this may be even more exhausting than her run from Eric." Jerry said trying to convey to Maura what he was telling her. Maura took a deep breath and nodded. Slowly and tentatively Maura got down on her knees. She bent over to Jane's nearby ear.

"Jane? Jane can you hear me?" Softly Maura kissed Jane on the lips. "Jane, listen to me baby. Remember what you promised me. You promised you would live for me. Promise me again Jane! Promise me you will fight. Promise me you will live for me." Jane moved coming too very briefly. She opened her eyes.

"Maura? What's wrong?" Jane's voice was ragged and breathy. Her eyes caught the ME's noting the concern.

"Live for me Jane. Promise." Jane looked back confused, but then nodded. "NO, say it Jane. You will live for me. Fight for me." Jane felt Maura's hands on the sides of her face blocking out everything except those intense green eyes that could see into her soul.

"I promise Maur. I'll live for you. Fight for you." Maura kissed Jane softly. "This is going to hurt isn't it?"

"I'll be there all the way through it with you and beyond. I promise." Maura said softly into Jane's ear. Jane attempted to swallow and couldn't. In fact she couldn't get a breath of air. "Maur? I can't.." Jane passed out. Jerry was immediately by her side.

"Ten minutes to touch down." The pilot radioed back.

"We can't wait ten minutes. Needle. " The medic grabbeda special needle out of the medic pack. Jerry immediately inserted it between Jane's ribs then pulled the plunger back. The tube filled with bloody watery fluid at first and then a yellowish fluid. Jane's breath was shallow, but she was breathing area was stabilized and Jane was readied for off load when they landed.

"Maura, Greg told me to tell you he has landed Korsak and the others at the hospital already. They will meet you inside." The roof of Boston General came into view as the helicopter landed. Medical personnel waited in the safe area ready for the helicopter to land. The side doors to the helicopter opened and Jane was lifted off. Maura watched as Jerry, the attending surgeon, and medical personnel rushed Jane inside. Maura helped Tommy off as several nurses and physicians surrounded him.

"I'm fine. Just take care of Jane." Maura grabbed Tommy turning him to look at her.

"Please let them check you over. I can't worry about my future brother in law being hurt." Tommy acquiesed, but hugged Maura before he was escorted inside. Maura was escorted to a waiting area. Lt. Cavanaugh was already present as were several FBI agents. Everyone began asking questions at once, making threats, and yelling. Maura sank down on the couch with her hands over her ears until a loud whistle shut everyone up. Maura looked up into the eyes of Frankie and Angela Rizzoli. Angela moved quickly over to Maura grabbing her in a hug.

"Enough. You," Frankie pointed at the FBI, "didn't think my sister was important enough to be bothered to look for her. So shut up and sit down. " Frankie turned to Lt. Cavanaugh. "Sir, Eric Leonard did indeed kidnap and torture my sister before we arrived to save her. Korsak and Frost have also been given evidence from Sheriff White of Ashby that leads us to believe the Eric Leonard was the bomber in the two incidents downtown. The sheriff has found evidence of some type of sedative gas and bomb parts in his cabin in the woods outside of Ashby. " Detective Frost moved forward now as Frankie moved off to the side.

"Furthermore, both incidents were to used to hide the fact that Eric Leonard had kidnapped Jane. Eric Leonard is not only responsible for the killing of the four women here in Boston, but at least ten more in Ashby. Jane woul d have been his next victim had it not been for the divine intervention of Dr. Isles and Sheriff White. The full report will be on your desk by tomorrow. The cabin outside of Ashby has been secured as well as the evidence at the crime scene in the forest will be sent to BPD." Detective Frost said.

"What about Eric Leonard? Where is he?" Lt Cavanaugh had the FBI breathing down his throat, but he so did not want another serial killer after his lead homicide detective.

"I am afraid I must report that as Deputy Lacy and Johns were attempting to bring Eric Leonard in to custody he broke free grabbing two hand grenades he had in his nearby backpack and blew himself up. The Ashby Coroner has collected his individual parts and will send them for processing to FBI lab in Quantico if needed." Detective Korsak said.

"Doctor Isles will you please help the FBI on this case…" Lt Cavanaugh said only to beinterupted by Maura.

"No sir, I will not. I have a conflict of interest in this case as the suspect was after my fiance. I believe it would be better if you turned it over to one of the other junior medical examiners as for me I will be staying right here until Jane is better." Dr. Isles glared at the FBI and then walked out of the waiting room. Angela accompanied her down the hall. "I need a cup of coffee." Maura said, though what she really needed was Jane in her arms. Maura pushed the button to the elevator, but before she could get on board Angela guided her to a room off to the side. Maura thought it was the chapel and was about to protest when she came face to face with her birth father.

"He needed to speak with you, but was a little worried about all the police around. Especially the FBI who think they are soooo important." Angela looked at Doyle and Maura watching each other. Angela stepped up to Doyle. "Thank you for taking care of Eric Leonard. Hopefully, she will sleep again at night." She hugged the man and then left.


	15. Chapter 15

**Glazed Feelings **

**Part 15**

**Rizzoli and Isles are the property of TNT and Tess Gerritson. I am just borrowing them to produce some angst. Hmmm, Jane rescued, Tommy fought for her, The Isles bring help, Doyle…What does he want now?**

The click of the door told Maura she was alone with her birth father. Angela had left her to deal with her problems. Maura looked into Patrick's eyes reliving the warehouse, the intrusion into her home, her kidnapping from BPD. Every time Patrick showed up Chaos ensued except for right this moment. He had saved Jane and now had Eric.

"I wanted to let you know Jane can sleep without worry of Eric Leonard. He no longer breathes." Doyle said as he watched a shiver passed through Maura. "She is a strong woman Maura. You couldn't do any worse. I wish she wasn't a cop not because she and I are on opposite sides of the law. I worry about this." Doyle's hands waved at the area around them. "I worry she won't come home to you one day."

"That is my problem. Not yours! I knew what I was getting into when I chose Jane. I cannot help loving her and I do not want too." Maura wrapped her arms around herself and looked down. She felt self -conscious and frustrated with the man in front of her. She was angry at him for creating the trouble between Jane and her at the warehouse, but she was also grateful he had helped Jane in her hour of need. How did she balance these two sides of her life? She looked up at Doyle and let out a deep breath. "Do not take what I am about to say the wrong way. I appreciate and am deeply grateful that you saved Jane. I know you answered the call from Tommy. I don't know if you did it for me, for Jane, or for the Rizzoli's. Maybe you did it for something more. But I appreciate it to the depths of my soul." Maura hesitated now trying to figure out how to proceed with what she wanted to say to him. "We cannot keep doing this dance of you sliding in and out of my life. If what I think will happen with Jane and I happens, then you will be a part of our lives. She cannot seem to have any divided loyalties. Your participation in our lives has to be on Jane and my approval. I believe Jane understands and I now do there is no way we can keep you out, but we must keep the violence away. Neither Jane or I can live with it Patrick." Maura didn't know if Jane would approve and she was sure there would be arguments on what she was proposing, but it was better than the abrupt arrivals and departures that produced havoc in their life now.

"What are you saying Maura?" Doyle asked as he stared at Maura barely understanding what she was saying.

"For better or for worse I am your daughter. Jane will soon be your daughter-in-law. You will be allowed in our lives on a very limited basis and on our terms. Jane knows and I admit there is no way to keep you out." The woman in front of him trembled at what she was proposing. It was a deal with the devil and it could have serious ramifications for her, Jane, and every one they knew. Doyle studied the woman and nodded.

"I accept, however, we will set up the rules after Jane recovers. It can only be once or twice a year together. Anymore and the FBI or my enemies will know about you all." Maura nodded.

"Jane has to agree. I will not allow this to break us up." Maura stated in no uncertain terms. Doyle nodded. Maura stepped forward hesitantly, reached forward and hugged Patrick. "Thank you for my Jane's life." Doyle wrapped his arms around Maura afraid this moment would slip away.

"You never need thank me. We are family. Jane is family." Maura's warm breath spread across his shoulder creating a sense of comfort in the man that was out of place with his daughter's presence. Maura took a breath and smelled the fragrance that always lingered around Patrick. It was a mixture musk aftershave, Cuban cigars, and Irish whiskey. His hold on her was strong, firm, but gentle. For just a moment it reminded her of Jane. "No matter what Maura I will not compromise you and Jane. I promise."

"Just you being in our lives compromises us, but we will deal with it." Maura hugged him harder and stepped back as he released her. "You need to get out of here. The FBI and about half the Boston Police Force are coming and going." He nodded.

"Don't worry I have my ways." He handed Maura the cell phone Tommy had used to call him. "Call me if you need me. Call me if there are problems with Jane. I will talk with friends to keep an eye on you all here, but I want to know how she is doing. Agreed?" Maura looked into his eyes to see if he was lying. No he was telling the truth. She nodded. He hugged her quickly and then slipped out the door of the room. Maura sat down in a nearby chair and leaned back against the wall. What had she done now?

"Family always creates havoc." Angela said softly. She had not gone far when she left. When she saw Doyle leave she had caught the door before it could click shut and entered quietly. She now looked at a bone weary Maura Isles. Maura looked up into Angela's eyes.

"She will not be happy with what I have done." Maura said as Angela pulled a chair up next to her. Angela handed the cup of coffee she had gotten from the nurses' station and gave it to Maura.

"Let me guess, you asked him to be a part of your life." Maura turned her head in shock from where she had stared at the wall past Angela.

"How did you know?" Maura asked confused on how Angela could have figured it out.

"When Patrick came out of the room he was smiling. He doesn't seem the type to smile very often so I started to think on what would make him smile like that. I could only think of one thing." Angela said as she sipped her coffee.

"Jane is going to kill me. I'll probably lose her for life now." Maura leaned forward setting the coffee on the floor and grasping her head. Angela set her coffee down on a nearby table. She turned and gathered the young ME into her arms.

"Jane will not leave you. She may be mad at first, but I am sure your contact comes with rules. Jane loves you Maura. You will both work this out. Right now her recovery is more important." Maura nodded as tears began to fall.

"He almost got her Angela. He almost killed her." Maura started to sob as Angela let her tears fall alongside.

"I know baby. I know, but she is alive and is going to stay that way. You did good Maura. You got her here in time. Doyle and Tommy got to her in time. Now we have to put the pieces back together." Angela said softly as she hugged the woman and comforted her. Angela and Maura clung to each other for a while longer. Maura then sat up wiping her eyes.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to break down like that." Angela reached up and pushed a lock of hair behind Maura's ear.

"You're my daughter no matter what. I am always here for you. Which since you seem to be headed to the altar with Jane means this will become normal." Maura chuckled softly and Angela soon joined her.

"Come on, let's find Dr. Reynolds. I want to know how Jane is doing." Maura said, as she and Angela rose to exit the room. Maura and Angela entered the waiting room. Two FBI agents sat nearby Korsak and Frost. All four had laptop computers and were working. Frost noticed Maura first and set aside his laptop.

"Hey, Dr. Reynolds is looking for you and Angela. He needs your permission for something." Frost said. He noticed Maura had been crying as well as Angela. Just then Dr. Reynolds walked into the waiting room. He waved Maura and Angela to a nearby couch. The FBI, Frost, and Korsak joined him.

"It is as I feared. Jane has Sepsis. The rash has appeared and blood tests have confirmed it. Jane is in ICU. We have started her on antibiotics to treat both the Sepsis and the pneumonia. Her lungs have been drained and we have started her on the medication to prevent them from filling again. Maura and Angela, in people Jane's age there is a five percent chance of death from Sepsis. However, due to the fact that Jane's immune system has been compromised the chances are now about thirty percent to forty percent. If the sepsis worsens it could impair her brain, heart, and kidneys. There is also a chance that blood clots could form in the organs, fingers, toes, legs, and arms causing organ failure or gangrene." Maura looked at Angela seeing the tension she felt reflected back. Frankie came over and sat down on the edge of the couch to reach out and hold his mom's shoulders from behind.

"What are you saying Jerry?" Maura asked her voice breaking.

"I am saying that Jane's condition is grave. If she makes it the next seventy-two hours she will most likely live, however, there are multiple complications that could result. You need to have family and friends here now. We need to talk about two other things. The gunshot wound and cuts are minor compared to the pneumonia and sepsis, but they are stressing her system. She also has some minor frostbite. She should be okay with that, but again it is stressing her system. She was severely dehydrated and has lost another ten pounds since last I saw her. Basically she is skin and bones right now. She is going to need extensive rest to recover. You are going to need to set up long term care for her at home until her body has time to recover, especially the immune system. If any of you are sick or even feel slightly sick, you need to stay away from Jane. Her body cannot take it right now and won't be able to for probably a month." Maura leaned forward only to be caught by a strong hand with a bandage on it. Maura looked up into Tommy Rizzoli's face. He has steri-strips across cuts on his neck and face. His right arm was bandaged from the elbow down to the hand. Tommy shook his head at her.

"She will recover. You don't know Jane like I do. She will recover and there will be limited complications. She is my sister. She is a fighter and she never gives up." Tommy said to Jerry. He then pulled Maura up into a hug. "You're family Maura. We got you." Maura nodded and hugged Tommy back.

"Can we see her Jerry?" Maura asked once she had stepped back from Tommy. Dr. Jerry shook his head no.

"Not yet. Another hour and then they will be done with the tests they are finishing up. Jane had a strange bump on the left side of her head that I wanted to check." Maura tensed even more. Jerry reached out, "No, stop reading anything into it. It's just to be cautious. I promise to let you know the minute you can go in or there is a change." Maura nodded and watched Jerry leave. The two FBI Agents stepped outside of the waiting room and made phone calls. Korsak went to call Lt. Cavanaugh. The Rizzoli family, Frost and Maura all sat down to talk.

"You know Jane will pull through. She just has to make everyone worry about her first." Angela said as she hugged Frankie. Maura took a shaky breath and looked at Tommy.

"How are you doing?" Maura asked the young man.

"Cuts and scratches, the worse is on the arm where Eric's knife dragged down my arm. I didn't even feel it until I was taken back into the emergency room. The fixed it with mostly steri-strips, but there are 14 stitches to close it. I'll be fine." Tommy said holding Maura close when he felt her shaking increase. "Frankie, can you get some milk and a banana?" Frankie saw Tommy nod toward Maura.

"Yeah, ma can you come with me?" Angela nodded and got up walking next to her son. Tommy mouthed the word blanket to Frost.

"Hey, I'll be right back." Frost left the room quickly. Maura and Tommy were now alone.

"I can't believe you called him." Maura said softly. "How did you even know?"

"After Hoyt's attack on you two the last time Jane became worried she may not make it one day. She gave me the number to call in case something should happen and she couldn't protect you. She said you were everything to her." Tommy said softly as he watched Maura's head droop a little to his shoulder. Frost came back in with the blanket and pillow. Tommy lifted Maura up as Frost situated the pillow. He then lowered Maura to the couch and sat on the floor even as Frost covered her.

"Tommy, I'm not tired." Maura said afraid to go to sleep in case Jane slipped away. Frankie and Angela came back in to the waiting room. Tommy handed her the banana and milk.

"Eat and drink." The look in Tommy's eyes told Maura he was not taking no for an answer. She sat up a little ate the banana and drank the milk. Surprisingly she was hungry. "Now rest. Yes, I know you are not tired. Jane needs you rested and you can't do anything right now. Let us do the worry and pacing. We will make sure you are woken if something happens." Maura wanted to protest but the adrenalin from the crisis had worn off. Her body was protesting the need for sleep. She laid her head down and closed her eyes. Tommy watched as her breathing evened out. Maura was asleep in less than fifteen minutes.

"Ma, get some rest." Frankie was saying as he covered her up on the other couch. Frankie watched as his mom fell asleep. Korsak came in with coffees for everyone. The boys sat in the nearby chairs with Korsak and Frost. The FBI agents came in and sat on the floor.

"John Tipton, this is my partner Anna James. Sorry we have to be here right now." Korsak nodded and shook his hand.

"I understand. The bureau doesn't want its prime witness to escape before they get a statement. Though I think the evidence speaks for itself." Korsak said nodding toward Anna James.

"Well, the parts of Eric Leonard have been confirmed. The pictures of the two crime scenes in the woods, too bad we won't be able to get anything else from them what with the storm and all raging there. The cabin though has been a gold mine. The case is pretty open and shut. I have Tommy's statement. I need to talk to Doctor Reynolds on when he thinks Jane will be ready to talk and then we can get out of your hair." Agent Tipton said. Tommy watched Maura remembering what Jane said about nightmares. He saw the first signs start to appear. Frankie went over to calm her though as Tommy continued to watch.

"Don't take this the wrong way. I'll be happy when you are gone. You guys never are good news." Anna James frowned and went to say something. Tipton cut her off.

"I know you don't like our interference. I'm sorry we didn't listen. Next time we will." Tipton said as he saw Dr. Reynolds approach. Dr. Reynolds spoke to a handsome young man. He nodded and then went back inside ICU. The young man came into the waiting room.

"Maura Isles?" He asked. Tommy rose and walked over.

"Maura and ma are sleeping. Can I help you?" Tommy asked protectively standing in the man's way.

"You are?" the man asked.

"Jane Rizzoli's brother, Tommy." Tommy said still blocking the way. The young man nodded.

"I'm Albert, Dr. Reynold's partner. He asked me to come down here and bring dinner for all of you. I have it set up in the conference room down the hall." Tommy smiled and shook the man's hand.

"Nice to meet you Albert. I tell you what, why don't you take all of these with you. Let's, let Maura and ma sleep a little longer." Tommy said, as the rest of the men rose to follow Albert.

"Great, I'll make sure there is food for them and you left. Nice to meet you Tommy." Albert looked at Maura now that Tommy stepped aside. Her face lacked the stress and tension of her waking hours. But he could tell just by looking the exhaustion and worry the young woman was going through. She was a friend and he would be there for her. Korsak invited the FBI and soon the room was only populated by two sleeping woman and Tommy Rizzoli. He checked his mom tucking the blanket around her more. He then moved to Maura noticing her twitching in her sleep.

"Shhhh, Jane is going to be just fine Maura. She is a fighter. There is no one like her." Tommy Rizzoli spoke softly, not noticing his brother lean against the door. "She will be fine. Rest." Maura's twitching and fidgeting stopped. The ME once again fell into a deep sleep.

"You did good brother. If you hadn't gotten to her when you did she would have been dead." Frankie said softly not wanting to wake the women. "You took a big chance with your probation." Frankie knew if Tommy had been caught with Doyle his probation would have been suspended and he would have been thrown into jail. As it was Tommy had given a sanitized version of what happened to the agents.

"If Jane had died I wouldn't have wanted to be on the outside." Tommy said as he looked up at his little brother. Tommy rose and walked over to a chair to sit. "You need to eat. Go on." Tommy stared off into space after he spoke.

"What's wrong Tommy? Something more is wrong. What is it?" Tommy looked up and sighed. "Jane and you have always been my protectors. I just wanted to protect her for once. I wanted to give back something. But I may not have been soon enough." Frankie walked over and gripped his brother's shoulder.

"You did good Tommy. You found a way to get to where she was and you stopped him from hurting anymore. If it hadn't been for you we would never have made it in time. So stop putting yourself down." Frankie grabbed his brother and hugged him. "She is going to be fine! She is too ornery to die!" A sob escaped Tommy.

"How many times does she have to go through this Frankie? Hell, she gets hurt faster than guys I knew in lock up." Frankie nodded. He and Tommy broke apart.

"Yeah, she always had to prove how tough she was. Remember old man Guerra's house. He was the Hispanic on the block in an Italian neighborhood. Remember the tree house he had in the back yard with the zip line." Frankie said smiling. Tommy laughed suddenly.

"Yeah, he owned those two lots and had put the zip line in for his grandchildren. Jane was what 7? She said she could do it. He wouldn't let her. So she snuck back in the middle of the night, dragged it to the top of the tree house, and then off she went on it. It amazed me. Because she was terrified of heights, but she refused to let anyone know. Too bad old man Guerra turned the light on in the backyard scaring her when she was half way down." Tommy said chuckling.

"I don't think I have ever seen mom so mad at her. She fell off and broke her arm. I think Jane was more upset than mom because she couldn't go swimming the rest of the summer. But do you remember the emergency room. She never cried. Not when she broke it, not when they set it, and not after. She said she was as strong as any boy." Frankie said the memory of his sister's bravery making him want to be more like her.

"She always felt she had something to live up too. She never did Frankie." Tommy said remembering late that night after everyone had went to bed sneaking into his sister's room. She had been given a pain pill and was out like a light. He sat next to her promising God he would protect her and keep her safe. When he went to prison he felt like he had failed her.

"Yes, she did. Our neighborhood was not forgiving for the weak. You know that." Frankie said and looked over to Maura. "I think it's one of the reasons Maura and Jane are attracted to each other. They don't have to be something they aren't when they are together. They can just be themselves." Maura stirred on the couch and sat up. Frankie and Tommy saw the confusion for a moment and then reality reasserted itself.

"Hey, has Jerry been in yet?" Maura asked. Frankie shook his head no.

"Albert is here and brought food. If you're ready you can walk down with…" Dr. Reynolds walked in just then.

"Maura, I can give you twenty minutes." Maura looked toward Angela. Frankie shook his head.

"You go. She needs sleep." Frankie said. Maura got up and followed Jerry into the hallway of ICU. She put on gown, booties, mask, hair tie, and washed her hands. Jerry walked her to Jane's room. Maura looked into the room and took a deep breath. She then walked inside. Jane was inside an oxygen tent and tubes and wires were attached over her body. The sound of the heart monitor and blood pressure cuff echoed in the background. Her body now removed of clothing and winter wear was thin and pale from blood loss. Her lips chapped from winter wind. She seemed to be breathing easier though and that heartened Maura.

"Oh Jane." Maura moved next to the bed and picked up her loves hand. It was cold to the touch and Maura attempted to warm it with both of hers. She leaned in close whispering to her. "I'm here Jane. You hang in there and fight love. I miss you and need you." Maura sat next to Jane's bed humming softly. Maura and Jane had gone to see Madame Butterfly at the Boston Opera House. Jane had fallen in love with the Opera. She had especially enjoyed the humming chorus from Puccini's Madame Butterfly. Maura now sat humming it softly as Jerry watched from outside. Just as Maura finished the tune Jane's hand moved gently gripping Maura's. Her eyes fluttered open and looked at her surroundings.

"Yesss, it hurts." Maura stood up to catch Jane's eyes as Jerry stepped inside. "You were humming again." Jane's voice cracked from lack of use.

"Yes, the Humming Chorus from Madame Butterfly. How are you?" Maura asked as Dr. Jerry came in and made a notation on her chart.

"Beeen better. Feel a little nauseous." Jerry came into view. "Hey Doc. So I'm going to be okay?" Jerry smiled and whispered to Maura. "No, no secrets from Jane. Jane has a right to know."

"He said it's the medication Jane. It's making you loopy." Maura said smiling. Maura leaned closer looking at her lover. The oxygen tent prevented her from coming close and she was restricted from kissing Jane, but the medical examiner was able to hold her hand and kiss it. Jerry frowned at her, but said nothing. "I love you Jane." Jane's eyes were fluttering as she fought to stay awake.

"I love you Maura. Sorry, I'm really tired." Jane said as her eyes fluttered shut. Immediately one of the machines screamed an alarm. Jerry moved around the bed as an ICU nurse entered. She reset the machine making a note on the chart and gave an injection into the IV. She watched the pulse monitor and nodded after ten minutes when it went back to normal. Jerry watched the monitor also. Maura drew in a shaky breath. One of these days she was going to have a stroke from all the tension Jane gave her.


	16. Chapter 16

**Glazed Feelings **

**Part 16**

**Rizzoli and Isles are the property of TNT and Tess Gerritson! I am just borrowing them to twist your heart in a little pretzel. You have no idea how hard this part is for me. I am determined to see it through to an interesting and perhaps heart stopping end. There are many chapters ahead.**

"Hey sis, I'm here watching over you. Don't worry, I got your back." Tommy whispered as he gazed over at the battered body of his sister from the chair where he kept his vigil. He would not let Jane wake to no one in the room. He knew about the nightmares after Hoyt and the shooting. Frankie had whispered to him what his mother would not speak about. Maura's reticence to speak of it to him told him all he needed to know to confirm it. Frankie and Angela had forced Maura to take a break. She was asleep down the hallway in one of the doctor's rooms. Dr. Jerry had made sure she could get rest by putting a do not disturb sign on the door with his name. None of the interns would use the room if he was present. Tommy leaned forward watching the rise and fall of Jane's chest as she struggled to breath. Jerry had come in earlier and cleaned the shoulder wound from the bullet. Bandages had been changed over his sister's entire body and more medication administered. Jerry had assured him that Jane was making progress, though slow progress. The breathing difficulty was from the sepsis. The next twenty four hours would tell.

"Come on sis fight! I know you have it in you. Remember when Frankie was six and he got beat up by Carla Tulucci's son. I do. You almost ruined mom and Carla's friendship when you went out and found him. Then you beat him up and made him write it out in a statement." Tommy chuckled. "Frankie was so embarrassed, but he was also happy you protected him. He would never tell you though. He whispered to me how he had been so scared and then you had taken care of the problem. He was so thankful Jane. Carla's son had been bullying him for weeks before you caught him. You were always the one who stuck up for the underdog." Tommy glanced at the clock outside the ICU on the wall where the nurses monitored all the patients. It was early somewhere around one in the morning. The hour when the ebb and flow between the veil of this life and the next was at its thinnest. He watched daring any non-corporeal or corporeal being to try and steal the life from his sister.

"I never told you, but I wanted to be just like you. I was never brave though. Just a coward and I knew it. It was why I was so mean to you sometimes. I knew you were the better of the three of us." Tommy hung his head finally admitting to the one person who may understand. She couldn't reply though. She couldn't assuage the grief inside he felt for being such a small man.

"Yoooou are nooot a cooowardddd." Jane responded in a bare whisper. Tommy's head popped up to see his sister's eyes on him. "You…are my…brother. " Jane struggled to speak against the breath that was hard in coming. "I…love…you!" Tears fell down Tommy's face as he stood and leaned forward toward the bed.

"Shhh, don't speak. It just makes breathing harder." Tommy said softly as he took her hand. Maura had come up to the door and pressed the speaker button on the outside to listen.

"Do…not…cut yourself down. We… all…make mistakes… I forgive…you; you… must forgive…yourself." Jane said each word an effort of will. She squeezed his hand as hard as she could and put as much emotion into her face as she could. Tommy closed his eyes as the tears fell. Then he nodded and opened them. Jane saw they were clear of the confusion she had seen when he was speaking.

"Why do you have to be the strong one? How do you find the energy to love us all and protect us?" Tommy said softly as he watched his sister struggle with her injuries. Jane smiled as she relaxed into the bed.

"I just do." Jane slipped into sleep again...except there was a sudden plunge in her heart and pulse monitor causing the monitors to scream. Tommy looked in shock even as Code Blue was issued over the speaker. Maura was shoved aside as the nurses and doctors entered. Tommy was pushed out of the ICU by a nurse as the doctor's worked diligently to get a heart beat back. Tommy grabbed Maura as they watched the doctor's work. Seconds ticked by slower than weeks it seemed until Maura heard _"we have a pulse." _The heart monitor continued to grow steady and strong. She watched as the doctor's injected the IV with three medications. Her mind ran what she thought they would be, but her heart was with Jane willing her to breath. Doctor Palmer stepped out and approached Maura.

"She is stable and I believe there had been no brain damage." Maura let go a breath she didn't even know she had been holding. Tommy stood strong for her holding the medical examiner up. "The Sepsis is wreaking havoc with her system, but it could have been much worse. We were able to get her back right away. We have changed the antibiotic to a stronger one and increased her pain meds. Now it's up to her. I'm sorry I can't give you better news." He shook Maura's hand and walked away. Maura turned into Tommy's arms and began crying.

"Shhh, she is still here Maura. She is fighting. We knew there would be a few setbacks." Tommy worked hard to control his own emotions as he held Maura. Jane would want him to be there for her doctor. Maura nodded. She pulled herself together and dried her tears on a tissue Tommy handed her. One of the ICU nurses approached Maura.

"You can go in now Dr. Isles. There is a Detective Korsak asking for you Mr. Rizzoli. He is waiting outside of ICU." The nurse stated softly. Tommy nodded as she walked away.

"I'm going to go see what Korsak wants. Will you be okay?" Tommy asked gently lifting Maura's face with his hand under her chin. She nodded.

"Yes, I just need some time with Jane." Maura said hugging Tommy. "Thank you for being here. Jane would be so proud of you." Tommy nodded. He watched as Maura stepped inside moving over to Jane's side and taking hold of her hand. He wished he could spare them both this, but he knew it was a part of Jane's life. He moved down the hallway and through the door. Korsak waited in a chair in the waiting room.

"What's up?" Tommy said as he sat down. Korsak pulled out an envelope marked Federal express. He handed it to Tommy. It was marked to Jane Rizzoli from Leonard Industries. He noticed it was opened. "You've read this?" Korsak nodded.

"Read it and then we need to talk." Korsak said as Tommy opened it up.

"_Well Jane, if you're reading this then I am dead and you have won. I bet you are feeling real proud of yourself. Well, you shouldn't. I have left a few surprises for you in the next few weeks. Don't ask Leonard Industries as I am only using their address for this one letter. This isn't over. Even in death I will win Jane. I will win! _

_Eric Leonard."_

"Oh God, what has he done now?" Tommy said as Frankie and Frost came into the room. He watched as his mother entered the ICU ward. Tipton and James then entered. "You all know?" They all nodded.

"We have already started searching for the surprises. We are retracing the steps Eric Leonard took as best we can. But we need you to stay here with Maura and Jane. We don't know if he has an apprentice or what he has done." Frost said as he took the envelope and letter from Tommy.

"Have you told Maura?" Tommy asked. They all shook their heads no. Tommy let his head drop as he felt his brother place a strong hand on his shoulder. "I'll tell her and mom. Just tell me what you need." Tipton and James quietly explained what the plan was to Tommy and then left after they were sure of his acceptance. Several officers moved into position on the floor to make sure of the families safety. "This is not fair Korsak. This is just not fair."


	17. Chapter 17

**Glazed Feelings**

**Part 17**

**Rizzoli and Isles are the property of TNT and Tess Gerritson. I am just borrowing them for a little fun. Sorry, real sorry, real, real sorry.**

"There is nothing here. I'm telling you her apartment and work is clear." Korsak said as he walked through the apartment with Agent James. Korsak barely recognized Jane's clean apartment. He had been so used to seeing beer bottles, pizza boxes, and dirty laundry strewn about that the changes Maura had made in her short time there still stunned him. Frankie came out of Jane's bedroom shaking his head and blushing furiously.

"Korsak, never ever make me go through Jane's closet again. There are things in there a brother should never see or know about his sister." Frankie said swearing to god he would never tell Jane he found the black box with unmentionable items. For a moment his mind flashed to Jane and Maura in bed. "NASCAR, FOOTBALL, SOCCER… Oh God, brain bleach please." Agent James began to chuckle at Frankie imaging what he had found on his search. The phone began to ring in Jane's apartment. It picked up on the second ring.

"This is Jane Rizzoli. I am not here at the moment, but leave your name, number and a short message. Goo Red Sox!" BEEP! All the officers turned suddenly when the message began.

"Ahh, I'm hoping this is Jane Rizzoli the detective. I have a package for you from an Eric Leonard. I have left it at the Greyhound station down town locker 559. The key is in your mail box. Have a good day." BEEP. Nobody moved for a second too shocked on hearing what the voice had said. Korsak recovered first.

"Oh shit, we need to get that key out of Jane's mail box. Where is her key?" Agent James asked Frankie and Korsak. She looked about the apartment trying to locate any keys.

"I know where she keeps it. Just let me get it." Frankie moved into the kitchen to the key rack. He found the key he was looking for when he noticed something odd. Jane's car wasn't parked in the same place as it had been when she came home sick and Maura and Frankie had found her.

"Frankie, hurry up." Frankie turned and began to think. No, it had been in the same place until Jane's disappearance. It was then he noticed something near the window.

"Wait, we have a problem." Frankie said turning to look back at the window. "Korsak get Hazmat and the bomb squad. We need to evacuate the building and don't move."

"Why? What's going on?" Korsak came toward Frankie, but Frankie held up his hand to stop him. Korsak stopped.

"Don't move." Frankie was looking at a thin wire that ran up from Jane's kitchen window. It had been so thin and clear he hadn't seen it. Very carefully Frankie reached over to the counter and took a handful of flour out of the jar that sat there. "Whatever you do no one move." Frankie gently blew the flour into the air watching as it settled on thin clear filament wire rigged through the kitchen. Frankie was caught between all of it. How he had avoided pulling any of it was a miracle? "Call for them now. No one move."

Meanwhile at the precinct…Frost and Agent Tipton searched Jane's desk area. They could locate nothing except a 2010 Red Sox program, a small package of chocolate covered coffee beans, and a small box wrapped in Gold Wrapping paper with a gift card that said to Maura from Jane. "There is nothing around her desk or inside of it. Maybe we should check Doc's office. Eric knew about Jane and Maura." Agent Tipton nodded and headed down to the morgue. Thirty minutes of searching finally produced a small black box with a cylinder attached to it. Agent Tipton put his finger to his lips signaling for Frost to not speak and motioned to the door. He carefully closed the door and they moved to the elevators.

"We need Hazmat here right away. That looks exactly like the gas cartridges used in the down town on the Business and Market area." Agent Tipton made the call to Hazmat while Frost called Lt. Cavanaugh. The building was just being evacuated when the call from Korsak came into the precinct. Agent James had sent a text to Agent Tipton alerting him to their problem. FBI had been mobilized and was in route to Jane's apartment building.

Meanwhile at the hospital…Tommy pulled himself together as he watched through the ICU window. His mom sat next to Jane speaking softly. Maura came up behind Tommy handing him a coffee.

"She is doing better. The last test showed the sepsis was finally responding to the antibiotics. Her breathing has improved in the last few hours. They are going to keep her sedated for another twelve hours." Maura said softly. Tommy hung his head in relief. He knew there was so much that could go wrong, but at least there had been some positive news.

"Can we talk for a moment? I need to tell you something." Tommy said pulling his shattered emotions together for what he knew would be a heart wrenching talk. Maura nodded the look of confusion reflecting through her eyes. She and Tommy walked out into the waiting room. Maura sat on the couch while Tommy sat in front of her on the coffee table. He set his coffee down to the side and took Maura's out of her hand.

"Tommy, what's going on? Please just tell me." Tommy reached forward and took Maura's hands. He took a deep breath and spoke with strength and surety.

"Maura, Eric Leonard contacted Korsak this afternoon." Tommy went to move on when Maura stood abruptly.

"How? He is dead Tommy. I was assured of it." Maura responded angrily. Tommy stood as he watched the police officers assigned for protection move a little closer.

"Please sit so I can explain. Our friends worry." Tommy indicated the officers with a head nod. Maura looked to where they were being observed by them and relaxed a bit. She sat down though the nervous tension now hummed through her body. Tommy proceeded to softly explain the situation. When he was done Maura sat stunned not saying anything. Tommy watched as a cold, hard look replaced the normally open, friendliness of Maura Isles.

"Tommy would you give me a few moments alone? Please check on your mother." Tommy knew when he was being dismissed. If he had been Jane he would not have left at that moment, but he was not Jane. Jane had this way of dealing with this part of Maura he had no way of understanding.

"All right. Will you be okay?" Tommy inquired looking at Maura uncertain to what was happening within the woman.

"I will be fine." Maura said already thinking and planning. She watched as Tommy Rizzoli moved back into ICU hesitantly taking one last look at her. She turned looking out the window of the waiting room. She took a deep breath and walked to the officers.

"Officer, I would like to give you a list of people allowed on this floor to visit Jane Rizzoli." The officer nodded. Once Maura had made sure only family and close friends would be allowed entry. She walked down the hall and entered one of the conference rooms. She opened her phone and made a call. "Mother, I need your help." Maura quickly explained what was going on and what she needed. Maura nodded several times. "I appreciate this mother. I truly appreciate this from the bottom of my heart." Maura then made a call to the one person she hated calling.

"Maura, what is wrong?" Doyle's voice came through the phone.

"Jane has a problem. Seems our friend from the woods has left several small nasty surprises for her. My friends are trying to take care of them, but I am worried how these could have been done."

"I'll see what I can find out. I have been looking into Eric's past before you called. I wanted to make sure he wouldn't harm you anymore. How is Jane?" Doyle asked his voice softening. Maura took a deep breath cementing her emotions.

"She almost died earlier this morning. The sepsis overwhelmed her breathing and heart. Both stopped for a moment, but they were able to get her back before any brain damage could occur. She has improved since then, but there are problems ahead I know." Maura's voice cracked. She stopped to take a gulp of air and control herself.

"Maura you listen to me. Jane is a strong woman. She has a lot to live for and knows it. She will not leave you. She will be chasing me until the day I die." Doyle said with a positive assurity that angered Maura.

"Don't! Don't you talk about dying. I have had enough of death trying to steal away those I care about. I am going to make sure Eric Leonard burns in the hottest hellfire even if I have to resurrect him and kill him again!" Maura said with cold, calm wrath.

"Maura you listen to me. Do not do anything that will jeopardize you and Jane. Do you hear me?" Doyle said heatedly.

"I hear you." Maura said coldly and hung up the phone. "So Eric, you think you are going to win. Well, I have news for you. I am going to win. I am going to make sure you are burning in the hottest parts of hell with Jane's laughing alive face always in front of you." Maura whispered angrily.


	18. Chapter 18

**Glazed Feelings **

**Part 18**

**Rizzoli and Isles is the property of TNT and Tess Gerritson. I am just borrowing them for some fun. I am not sure about this chapter. Just let me know umm, okay…ahhhh, yeah...oh, just tell me what you think.**

Agent James and Korsak watched Jane's apartment building. It had been evacuated an over three hours ago. Several tenants milled around two blocks down the street in a white tent set up by the Red Cross. Statements were being taken to see if anything unusual had been noticed. Agent James and Korsak waited though watching and praying. Hazmat and the bomb squad were inside attempting to get Frankie Rizzoli out of the kitchen safely.

"This is not fair to them. It seems it is always the Rizzoli's." Korsak muttered as he watched the building.

"Yeah, I read the folder on you all before I came here. It seems you have more than the average deadly encounters." Agent James said quietly watching as two HAZMAT officers came out of the apartment and motioned to the nearby van where a container was being lowered. Korsak glanced that way hoping that meant they had finally disarmed whatever it was up in the apartment.

"I can't tell you how many times Jane has been stabbed, burned, cut, shot, broke bones, and had concussions. I always think she won't make it through another round, but then that damn indomitable will comes forth pushing her through another one. The last one, when she shot herself to kill a bad cop we almost lost her. The Doc that attended her told her something that shook her up bad." Korsak said looking over at James. James turned her head to look at Korsak seeing the pain in his eyes.

"What did he say?" Agent James asked feeling there was something Korsak knew that he hadn't told anyone, but had hidden all these months since the shooting. Korsak looked back to the apartment and then down at his shoes for a moment.

"He told Jane she was on borrowed time. The human body could only take so much abuse and she was pushing its limits. He told her she needed to be real careful for the next year and a half. He said even though she was fit to return to duty the body would take a full year to recover from all the trauma it had suffered. Her immune system was compromised for longer than a few months. Any severe injury before the year was up raised her chances of dying." Korsak looked back when he heard a shout from someone at the front entrance. One of the HAZMAT guys came running out. He was handed two syringes and ran back inside. Korsak tensed up and now watched through Jane's front windows.

"She wouldn't have told you that. How did you find out?" Agent James asked softly considering what Korsak had told her. Jane should have technically never been on duty.

"I got her shit face black out drunk. I forced her to tell me. She never remembered what she told me and I will never let anyone know. You do what you have to for your partner." Korsak looked her dead in the eye. "Do you understand?" Agent James nodded thinking back to an incident with Tipton where she covered his back. The bureau would never know what happened and she would never tell. So yeah, she did understand. She looked back toward the apartment to see Hazmat walking out with Frankie Rizzoli behind them.

"Yeah, I understand." James said firmly. Korsak and James moved toward Frankie.

"You okay kid?" Korsak asked as Frankie rubbed his arm.

"Yeah, they had to inject with two different serums for the gas in the apartment in case it went off when they were removing it. They are not sure what's inside, but Johnny, the HAZMAT guy said they believe it is something worse." Frankie let loose a shaky breath as Johnny walked up to him with his head shield off.

"You okay?" Johnny asked Frankie. Frankie nodded.

"Just really shaken." Johnny smiled, and slapped him on the back.

"I wasn't going to let Jane loose a brother. Did you know that she volunteered to help my son's baseball team a few years back when their coach suddenly died? She spent the whole summer working with them. My boy never forgot that summer. They didn't win the championship, but Jane taught them more about good sportsmanship than they ever knew." Johnny said smiling and laughing.

"That's Jane. She believes in treating others right." Frankie said softly.

"Yeah, she even took the entire team to a Red Sox game. She never would accept any money for it. I don't know how she paid for it. The boys got signed baseballs out of it and Red Sox hats. Anything you ever need Frankie you just call. Jane is the best in my book." Johnny shook his hand and walked back toward the HAZMAT van.

"I'm going to check on when we can get into the apartment. Be right back." Agent James moved off toward the HAZMAT van. Korsak watched her walk away and turned to Frankie.

"So, what did they say?" Korsak asked Frankie grabbing his arm.

"Whoever set up the trap in Jane's kitchen really knew what he was doing. Johnny said it was one of the most intricate booby traps he has ever seen. There were two false leads that if they had been tripped I would have been dead most likely. We need to find who rigged these. I cannot for one minute believe Eric did this in anyway. So he has someone helping him." Frankie said angrily.

"We will find them. We will find them." Korsak said as Agent James headed back toward them.

"They will let us inside in a couple of hours. They are going to check the building for more booby traps and make sure everything is clear. I just heard from Agent Tipton, they have cleared Maura's office. BPD is back up and running. The second HAZMAT team is analyzing the device now with personnel from Langley that have flown out. Hopefully we will get answers soon. The bus station has been closed and cordoned off. HAZMAT is on their way over there now." Korsak looked up and then at his watch. "Let's get lunch. There is nothing we can do for a while." They all nodded, except for Frankie.

"I need to check on Jane. I'll meet you back here in a couple of hours. That okay?" Korsak nodded.

Meanwhile at the Hospital…

"You know I remember when you first asked me to go out with you. You were so cute and shy. I never thought you would get the words out Jane. I thought for sure we would go on dancing around each other with no end in sight. Then, lo and behold you surprised me. You walked into my office acting nervous as a cat and invited me to lunch. I didn't know what to think." Maura laughed at the memory. She continued to rub Jane's hand and watch her as she slept. "Then instead of taking me to our normal café down the block you drove across town the Island Creek Oyster Bar. I was so shocked. Lunch was wonderful. Then you handed me the single red rose the waiter had been holding for you and asked me to be your girlfriend. I was so overwhelmed. I know you thought I was going to reject you at first when I was so quiet for so long. It was just that I finally was getting what I wanted Jane in my dreams. I was scared if I spoke it would shatter and it would be a real dream. Then you spoke again while touching my hand. I knew then it was real and said yes Jane. I will always say yes to you. When lunch was over I thought we would be going back to BPD, but you surprised me by taking me to a play called "Next to Normal". I remember I protested, but you told me you had called us off of work. Afterwards we just walked arm in arm talking. I still remember those soft kisses Jane. I miss them." Maura's voice cracked as she attempted not to break down. "Don't you leave me? Please, keep fighting. I'm fighting for us out here. I promise love no one, but no one is going to hurt you. I have seen to that." Tommy came inside of Jane's room then.

"Hey, ma has food for you and a change of clothes. She says come on out." Tommy said softly. "I'll watch over her now. We still have several hours before her sedative wears off. So go ahead and take a break." Maura was about to protest, but Tommy raised his hand. "You don't have to be gone long. Just take a break. You have sat here for hours Maura and it's near one in the afternoon. Go on." Maura sighed and nodded. She rose and placed a kiss on Jane's hand. If all went well, Jane would be out of the oxygen tent later tomorrow. Then Maura could finally plant a real kiss on those lips of Jane's. Maura exited ICU and noticed her security guards in place on the ICU floor. Her mother's call to AKON security had brought them to the hospital within an hour after she hung up. AKON was security for the rich and famous. They knew how to be discreet, but could protect and secure almost anything. Most of the guards and personnel were former military members from the elite units. They had yet to secure Maura's house because BPD wanted to check it out for any devices before they let security take over. Maura had agreed and so had William Sawyer the owner of AKON. Maur could let out a little sigh of relief.

"Hey, come on honey it's time for you to rest a little." AKON had commandeered one of the nearby conference rooms. The hospital hadn't been happy, but a donation from Jane's mother had smoothed ruffled feathers. Maura stepped into the room and was shocked by its transformation. There were cots with soft mattresses, a table of food from Angela was set up, and Maura's bag sat nearby. Maura grabbed the bag and went into the nearby bathroom. She showered and changed into a loose fitting pair of slacks that complimented her frame and a matching blouse she then reached in for a pair of shoes and dress nylons when she saw Jane's red socks jersey. There was a note pinned to it. Maura pulled it out and looked at the note.

_**Jane says this always helps you calm down and relax when you're worried. I thought it might help. She is going to be just fine Maura. She is a Rizzoli. We are made out of tougher stuff than this. Love you honey,**_

_**Angela.**_

Maura pulled the jersey to her face inhaling deeply. It smelled of Jane that unique scent of lavender, lovemaking, and comfort. Maura just didn't know another way to frame it. It brought tears to her eyes and before she knew it she was crying. She cried for a little while until she could control herself again. Then she wiped her tears, fixed her face, and walked out. Angela looked up as she walked into the room noticing the red eyes, tear stained face, and Jane's jersey on the ME. Maura walked over and hugged her.

"Thank you." Maura said as Angela hugged her back holding onto the woman firmly.

"You're my daughter. I take care of my family. Come on and eat now." Angela, Maura, and several security guards sat down and ate lunch. The security guards rotated in six hour shifts so no one was overtired or out of focus for their job. Angela had already befriended a guard named Asher. He was assigned to Angela to make sure she was safe. The boys had declined a guard, but insisted their mother have one. Angela was a little incensed at first until she and Asher had begun talking. Since then all had been rosy. Angela, Maura, and Tommy took turns in the ICU though Maura spent the most time. Tommy had not told Maura and Angela what had happened to Frankie or at BPD. He was going to leave that to Frankie. Korsak had warned him not to say anything until they were sure Frankie would be okay. Dr. Reynolds strode into the conference room.

"Jerry, how is Jane?" Maura asked immediately. She had seen some color returning to the detectives face, but was worried she was imagining it.

"Actually, that is what I am here to talk with you about." Maura and Angela cringed at Jerry's tone. The young doctor looked up from what he was studying on the chart and noticed their concern.

"No Maura, no. She is doing fine. In fact, the sepsis is on the run now with the antibiotics. I'm not saying she is out of danger, but she is much better than we expected this soon." The relief in the room was tangible as tears began to fall down both women's faces. Asher brought over a tissue for them. "I believe if Jane keeps healing at this rate we can move her from ICU later tonight or tomorrow to a private room."

"Thank you Jerry, thank you." Maura said taking her friend and colleagues hand. Angela reached over and took Maura's other hand.

"See, told you she is a fighter." Angela laughed. Now with the good news the ladies and gentlemen began eating anew. "Come Doctor Reynolds. I bet you haven't had a good meal all day." Angela fixed the protesting doctor a plate and made him sit down. Maura and Asher almost laughed at the way Angela fussed over the good doctor. Maura took a deep breath and closed her eyes. Thank God something was going right.

The gentlemen moved through the rooms quietly. There was no one around right now. He had watched as BPD cleared the main house and then the gate house. It hadn't been hard to gain access to the gate house. He just went through a neighbor's backyard on the pretense of fixing some DSL lines. He entered the hallway to the bedrooms and set to work. He laid the thin filament wire blending it in perfect with the wall and floor. He then set the canister inside the hall closet where it could release its deadly contents and no one would know until it was too late. He then carefully cleaned the area and walked out of the gatehouse. He made his way back through the fence.

"Sir, what did you do?" Maura's neighbor confronted him again. Oh this little man was annoying.

"Just repaired a section of optic wire." The gentlemen took out a piece of Optic line showing the neighbor. The man harrumphed and turned around to go back to his house.

"You would think they would have made spider bots to repair those items by now." He said as the gentlemen followed him.

"Oh there is some things sir, which just needs a little finesse when done. Thank you and Good day to you." The gentlemen returned to his van and then pulled out a notebook. In the notebook was a list: Bus station, BPD, Rizzoli's apartment, Isles office, Morgue bin three, Frost's car, and Korsak's house. Little check marks were next to each one except Frosts and Korsak's names. "Yes, just a little finesse. I wonder how my little surprises are working out?"


	19. Chapter 19

**Glazed Feelings **

**Part 19**

**Rizzoli and Isles are the property of TNT and Tess Gerritson. I am just borrowing them for a little fun. *sigh* I am so sorry about the inclusion of a second baddy. However I have a plan… I really do. Just a little repose for all of you. May all your dreams be filled with Rizzles.**

Jane slowly became aware of an elephant sitting on her chest not a big elephant, maybe more like a baby elephant. She opened her eyes slowly the light blinding her briefly. She closed her eyes again attempting to adjust to the light and take in a deep breath. The baby elephant hadn't left, but he was getting smaller. She opened her eyes and allowed the room to swim into focus. Pale blue walls with a large screen television were in front of her. She moved her head feeling pain lance through her shoulder. She grimaced, but held her voice under control. She could see a giant bay window that looked out on the city from the windows left side. On the window's right she could see the other wing of the hospital. The sun was shining. Jane could tell from the lights direction that it was late afternoon, very near sunset. Right in front of the window was a leather couch that could double as a bed. A recliner chair sat to the left of the couch near the window. A nightstand sat next to the bed Jane occupied. Jane could see Tommy asleep on the couch. Maura was in the recliner with a blanket and pillow. They were both soundly asleep. Jane smiled and relaxed closing her eyes. She decided this was as good a timeas any to test her body out. Slowly she started with her feet and legs having learned after shooting herself to take it slow. _"Yes, can still move my legs and my hips though they are sore. Come on Jane, no sound. Maura needs her sleep. Now try your upper body." _At this point Jane felt pain like a suffocating blanket squeeze her chest causing her to cough violently and repeatedly. She couldn't stop. She attempted to turn to her side and curl in a ball, but the pain got even worse causing her coughing spasm to increase. _"God, someone kill me please. I need this to stop."_ Jane tried to stop coughing, but she couldn't. She felt strong, gentle hands grab her firmly, lift her up, and turn her to her back. She a felt soft, but firm body slip behind her and hold her steadily.

"Easy Jane, easy, slow deep breathes. Close your eyes... concentrate on my voice. Breathe…. in and out, come on Jane you can do it. Breath with me in and out…" Maura's voice cajoled and soothed Jane. The spasm slowly released Jane's chest from the coughs vice like hold. The detective relaxed back into Maura breathing in time with her. The pain fled from the patient resolute determination of Doctor Isles. She felt a soft kiss on her head.

"Thank you Maura. You are a life saver." Jane's breathy voice responded. Jane snuggled back into Maura enjoying the feeling of her girlfriend. Soft kisses still rained down of Jane as Maura massaged along Jane's lower back, shoulders, and side easing her pain. "How long have I been out?" Jane inquired remembering last waking to Tommy in the ICU ward.

"Too long. Too long Jane." Maura squeezed gently trying to reassure herself that Jane was back with her. "Two days. We had you transferred earlier this morning to a private room from ICU. Dr. Reynolds says you are doing better. You just need to take time to recover." Tears slid down Maura's face softly trickling onto Jane's hair and along the side of her face.

"Hey, baby?" Jane said softly concern coloring her words. She attempted to move to see Maura.

"No Jane. You could start coughing again. Hang on, let me do the moving." Jane felt Maura move replacing her body with a pillow. Then Maura lay next to Jane situating herself so she could look on her lover. The bed in the private room was large enough to accommodate both of them. Jane took a look at her lover seeing the strain around her eyes and mouth. Jane reached out her injured arm grimacing again tracing the tense lines of worry. Maura began to object, however, Jane settled the argument.

"No, you are exhausted, worried, and need a hug as bad as I do." Maura looked into Jane's eyes suddenly fracturing inside. Jane used her good arm and pulled Maura into her side. She carefully wrapped her arm with the injured shoulder around Maura holding her as tightly as she could. "It's going to be okay Maura. I promise. I'm going to follow the doctor's orders and do everything you tell me."

"Liar." Maura snorted crying softly. The medical examiner hadn't forgotten how Jane had acted when she was recovering from the gunshot wound. It was all Maura could do to keep her occupied. Jane chuckled as she relaxed into the bed. Finally, feeling like she had come home.

"I…" Jane began when fingers stopped her words.

"Don't! Don't promise something you can't deliver on detective. We have been down that road once. I don't want to go there again." Maura said inflexibly. Jane contemplated the look in Maura's eyes and the strength with which the words were delivered. She nodded. Maura removed her hand and leaned forward kissing Jane softly and firmly. When they broke apart Maura backed up a bit. "I love you. Thank you for fighting and holding on Jane. I don't want to live this life without you." Jane smiled and kissed Maura again.

"Nor do I want to live this life without you. So I will try and be more careful as long as you are by my side." Maura smiled brightly.

"It's a deal, detective. It's a deal." Maura whispered as she kissed Jane. Jane's good arm drifted down Maura's neck as the doctor leaned in closer. "Jane, we have to stop your injury..." But Jane continued urging Maura on and tempering her fiery heat by only letting her go so far. Her touches were meant to sooth and relax Maura while allowing her to take comfort in their intimacy. "I've missed this Jane. I've missed just being with you." Maura's murmur sent a shiver through Jane. They were interrupted by the clearing of a throat.

"Umm, I'm just going to go and...Yeah…ahhh, be right back." Tommy left the room quickly. Jane chuckled as she watched Tommy flee. She had forgotten all about him. Maura had a smirk on her face that made Jane smile more. Jane suddenly turned serious though gazing down at the medical examiner.

"Yeah, I missed the quiet intimacy we share." Maura rested her head on Jane's injured shoulder. She knew it had to be killing Jane, but the detective was holding her fast to her side. Maura began to trace soothing patterns along Jane's side with her fingers while whispering words of love. She watched as Jane relaxed allowing sleep to take her. Maura closed her eyes drifting into a healing sleep.


	20. Chapter 20

**Glazed Feelings**

**Part 20**

**Rizzoli and Isles are the property of TNT and Tess Gerritson. I am only borrowing them to create great angst and loving Rizzles. I have to tell you all it has been perfect weather where I live the last few days. Not too cold, not too hot, perfect breeze, mornings when you wake to the soft feel of your lover, birds singing, and joyful contentment. I have taken full advantage of it and I am now ready to rumble!**

"Jason Lemon!" Korsak exclaimed as he came running into the detective's pen. "It's Jason Lemon! He left a partial on the device from Jane's apartment. He served four years in Iraq before he got out and was hired by Leonard Enterprises where he was a security guard. He was charged with making sure Eric Leonard stayed out of trouble. He was an experienced EOD officer, explosive ordinance disposal. Not only that, but the military is looking for him. Seems a new type of hardware recently went missing from one of their bases. The two enlisted men who they have charged were paid by Lemon to get it for a special job. The device can be rigged for explosives or gas canisters." Korsak was thrilled. They had a name. Now all they needed was to get his address and haunts. Detectives scurried to their computers. Frost had already initiated several searches. Tipton and James were making on the phone with the bureau and other agencies. Now it was a matter of time until they caught him.

"Take a deep slow breath Jane." Dr. Reynolds stated as he listened with the stethoscope. Jane slowly dragged air into her lungs as Maura and Tommy watched from the couch. Jane filled her lungs half way when suddenly the coughing spasm grabbed and shook her frame. Fire burned her lungs as pain lanced through her chest, back, and abdomen from the coughing. Dr. Reynolds placed an oxygen mask over Jane's face and a nurse injected her IV with medication. Tommy held Maura while the two watched in agony as Jane struggled to stop coughing and breath. It took ten minutes for the medication and oxygen to do the trick, but not before blood appeared in the oxygen mask. The doctor laid Jane on her side while the nurse quickly changed out the oxygen mask. "Order an X-ray nurse and afterwards we may need to perform a bronchoscopy." Dr. Reynolds continued his exam while he spoke to Maura, Tommy, and Jane. "The appearance of blood may just be a ruptured blood vessel from the harshness of the coughing. Do not be alarmed. I will need to rule out anything else with a few tests. Nurse, please have the order for oxygen change to humidified oxygen. Your cuts and the gunshot wound are healing well. The concussion is another matter. You need to continue to rest and I will be ordering another CT scan for later today. You seem to have swelling. I think it may be from the coughing, but I want to rule out anything else." The doctor wrote a few things more into the chart. "You're not going anywhere for another week Jane." Jane felt exhausted from the coughing spasm, but she grimaced at the doctor and looked like she was about to protest. "Don't make me put you in ICU again. I will. You will do exactly what I tell you when I tell you. Do you understand?" Jane saw Maura's tense form behind Dr. Reynolds being held by Tommy.

"Yes, I promise." Jane said still trying to catch her breath. Dr. Reynolds nodded and motioned to Maura. Tommy went to see Jane as Maura stepped outside the room. Angela was just coming up the hall so he motioned both of them to the conference room where AKON was set up.

"Jane is improving. I am worried though. The blood is not abnormal, but the depth of the color is worrisome. Deep red blood like that could indicate other problems. Also, she has swelling on the brain from the concussion still that is abnormal. She needs to stay quiet and calm. If she can't I will have to sedate her." Maura nodded trying to think. So much was happening so fast that she had to constantly be thinking one step ahead.

"Tell me what we can do?" Angela asked quietly.

"Well, for one she needs to gain some weight. So you could bring a couple meals into her. Tonight would be good. Second, she is going to need a quiet place to rest after this is over. No work, no stress, just days relaxing and sleeping." Maura nodded smiling now.

"I have that covered. My family has a cottage in Martha's Vineyard. Would that work?" Maura asked as she saw Angela's worried look.

"Yes, that would be perfect. She could rest, take short walks, see the ocean, and relax." Maura smiled, but knew she had some work to convince Angela.

"Why can't she come home with me? Wouldn't it be better to have her near her family?" Angela asked now worried her daughter would die and she wouldn't get to see her last moments.

"No, not necessarily as family life can be stressful for a recouping patient sometimes. Jane will need hours of quiet without any possibility of work or previous stress interfering. If you are worried Angela about whether she will have complications I can assure you by the time I allow her to leave the only complication you need worry about is a hangnail." Dr. Reynolds responded watching the older woman's shoulders slump.

"Angela you can come up the weekend after Jane and I arrive to spend the weekend. You know you're welcome, but you will need to go work daily too." Maura said encouragingly.

"What about you? You're the head medical examiner." Angela said accusingly attempting to upend Maura's plans. She really wanted her daughter closer to watch over her.

"I have applied and received a leave of absence for the next month. One of the other medical examiners with the credentials will be taking over. They are all highly qualified and will perform well." Maura explained while Angela's face fell. Tommy walked up while Maura was trying to convince Angela.

"It will be okay mom. Come on, Maura has been taking care of Jane for years now. The two are as good as married. Leave Maura alone and go see your daughter." Tommy said pulling his mother off the couch and giving her a little shove towards Jane's room.

"Alright! Maura you were supposed to be on my side in this family. Now look how my kids are handling me." Angela complained as she walked away and entered Jane's room while grumbling about being placed in an old folks home early at her young age. Tommy just smiled. He had grown used to his mother's Italian ranting. Tommy turned back to Maura.

"I'm going to head back to the Gatehouse. I need some rest, change of clothes, and real food." Maura nodded and hugged Tommy.

"Thank you for being here. I really needed the support." Maura whispered as she released Tommy. Tommy kissed her forehead much like Jane would which caused tears to enter her eyes. Tommy and Jane were so much alike in ways and yet so very different. "Be safe."

"He will be since I am accompanying him." Laura Talas from AKON security stepped up next to Tommy. Tommy turned on the woman.

"Listen, I do not need a bodyguard. I can take care of myself." Tommy responded angrily.

"That may be so, but I have my orders. Devices have already been found at Detective Korsak and Frost's residences. Dr. Isles has engaged us to protect her family. That is exactly what I intend to do." Laura was firm and unmoving in her argument. Tommy looked at Maura pleading with his eyes.

"No, I almost lost Jane. I can't lose any of you. Laura stays for now." Maura stated evenly. Tommy sighed and nodded.

"Alright, but if anyone asks your my girlfriend. It just won't do to have them know I have a female bodyguard." Tommy said as he turned to leave.

"Okay, Mr. Rizzoli." Laura said smiling and winking at Maura.

"Don't call me Mr. Rizzoli. It sounds like you are addressing my father or grandfather. Call me Tommy." Maura and Dr. Reynolds chuckled as they watched the pair walk down the hallway Tommy complaining all the way and Laura just agreeing. Jerry turned to Maura.

"I mean it. Jane has to rest. The sepsis is almost gone. A few more days and the severe coughing should be gone. As long as the scans come back clear. The swelling on the brain is a concern I think it's there because the sepsis is there. I will let you know after the tests." Maura wrapped her arms around herself and held tight. She looked at the floor and took a deep breath.

"I think by the time we get to Martha's Vineyard I am going to need the rest too." Maura said softly. Jerry reached out and pulled her into a hug. "Rest with Jane in the bed in the room. It is not going to hurt her. If what you told me about her earlier coughing spasm is correct it can only help." Jerry said as he released her. "I will have Albert come by tomorrow to see you both. If you need me you have my number and my private number. Don't hesitate to call." Jerry said worried that Maura wasn't taking care of herself.

"Thank you Jerry. I appreciate it." Maura turned to walk back to Jane's room. She leaned against Jane's door a moment listening to the muffled voices inside and gathering her wits. She pushed open the door to see Jane struggling to get up.

"What do you think you are doing?" Maura called sternly. Jane looked like a deer caught in headlights as she stopped struggling to get out of bed while her mother held her in place.


	21. Chapter 21

**Glazed Feelings**

**Part 21**

**Rizzoli and Isles are the property of TNT and Tess Gerritson. I am just borrowing them for a short while. Sorry for the delay. State testing demanded my attention. I am back to writing. Plus new ideas popping up all over. **

Tommy peeked into Jane's room as the security guard stationed at the door cringed as each word. Crowe watched from behind Tommy.

"YOU will get back into that bed now. How dare you even take a chance to get up without help when it could cause a major setback! Do you have a death wish Jane?" Maura yelled. Jane who had been trying to get up and out of bed now settled quickly back into the bed. She even pulled the covers up attempting to hide. Her mother stepped back.

"I'll just step out for some coffee since it seems that Doctor Isles has everything under control here." Angela made a quick retreat for the door smiling all the way and cringing inside. She knew the tone of Maura's voice. It was the one she used when one of her underlings messed up and needed to know who was in charge. Tommy saw her coming and moved out of the way.

"Now Maur…" Jane began before she was cut off.

"Don't you Maura me! It may not have been your fault you were kidnapped Jane, but it will be your fault if you do not adhere to your promise to follow doctor orders to the letter. You are extremely ill. You can still have major setbacks and could still…" Maura's voice broke as she attempted to keep it together. She let the anger rise again to extinguish the pain inside her heart that threatened to make her cry. "You could still die. I will not allow you to kill yourself. Your family needs you badly. Your partner and Korsak need you." Maura moved toward the bed. "I need you!" Maura pushed the button to the nurses' station.

"This is Nurse Kelly. How can I help you Ms. Rizzoli?" Nurse Kelly's firm sweet voice came through the intercom.

"Nurse Kelly, this is Doctor Isles. I need you to bring Doctor Reynolds Hold Order into the room." Maura was looking Jane right in the eye when she said it. Jane didn't like whatever a Hold Order was from the sound of Maura's voice. She definitely knew she wasn't going to like it at all. Jane had never seen Maura this angry.

"Ah Geeze, has she already started. We will be right there." Nurse Kelly said and then the room went silent.

"Maura what have you done?" Jane asked hoarsely as her lungs were sore from where her mother had pressed her hand. Maura never got to answer as into the room walked two nurses and an orderly. Nurse Kelly walked over and took out a syringe. She injected Jane's IV. She then reached over to the humidified oxygen and placed the mask back on Jane's face. They had placed it on Jane an hour earlier after the doctor had examined her. The mask had come off when Jane struggled with her mother to get out of bed.

"You are going to be difficult patients aren't you Jane?" Nurse Kelly asked. Jane shook her head no as she held Maura's eyes. Nurse Kelly snorted.

"What have you done Maura?" Jane asked again anger beginning to ripple through her. For some reason though she was getting real tired.

"Only what is best for you. I promise Jane nothing that will hurt you." Maura said as Jane's eyes began to flutter shut. The orderly moved toward the bed as the sedative took effect. Maura backed away as she watched the nurses and orderly apply the wrist and ankle restraints. Jane would still have movement, but she would not go wandering until they were sure of why the blood had shown up. "Forgive me Jane. I can't lose you. You are going to heal the right way even if I have to battle you every moment," whispered Maura. Doctor Reynolds arrived about that time.

"Ahh, I see she tried to escape." Jerry said as he looked at Maura. Maura nodded in confirmation. "Okay, take her to X-ray. She needs a full chest workup." Maura watched as they undid the restraints, transferred Jane to a gurney and wheeled her away to X-ray. "She is going to be so mad at you Maura. It was a last resort item, but you were right to use it. I want to make sure we haven't missed anything."

"I'll deal with it." Maura said angrily. She was still so mad at Jane. Dr. Jerry nodded and left the room. Maura walked over to the window staring out at the afternoon sky. Why did she keep doing this to herself? What hold did Jane have over her? Why the hell couldn't she just walk away? God, before Jane her life had been easy. She could compartmentalize everything so nice and clear. Work, family, friends, dates, and sex had been easy. Just one, two, three…done. Nothing had been the same since she met Jane. She had all these new emotions and experiences she had never had to deal with before. God, is Jane worth all this?

"Yes, she is worth it." Maura turned to see Tommy standing inside the room.

"I don't know what you are talking about. Aren't you supposed to have gone home for a rest?" Maura said turning back to the window trying to ignore Tommy. She had started to hyperventilate when she lied to him.

"Yes, but I forgot my jacket. Mom caught me in the hall and told me what was happening. You are not a very good liar, you know that. I can see you Vaso-Vaso thing starting." Tommy said with a smirk. "You know the one thing about Jane that has always vexed me. She is the most argumentative, pain in the ass, stubborn person I have ever met. She is like a bulldog when she grabs hold of something. She just doesn't let it go. She will work it in the back of her mind until she solves the problem. She is tenacious. Not only that, but she makes it so you as a friend, brother, or partner can't let it go either."

"Tommy I am not up for this right now. Please say what you want to say and get it done." Maura said turning on him.

"Fine, I will." Tommy approached Maura grabbing both her arms forcing her to look at him. "You two are made for each other. You may not know what to do with her Maura, but neither do the rest of us. She came into your clean, sterile, organized little world and blew it apart from day one. She friended you when you thought you were unfriendable. She defined friendship, fun, life, and love for you. She loved the real you, the part you were so busy trying to hide from all those dumb asses you dated. Then you saw her shot and bleed out on a sidewalk in front of what was supposed to be the safest place on earth." Tommy said firmly trying to get Maura to see.

"Stop, I don't want to talk about this Tommy." Maura said trying to pull free.

"No, you will listen this time. She is always going to get hurt. It is her job. She loves you Maura much deeper than I have ever seen her love anyone. If you really can say you don't love her, can live without her, can stand to not know what she is doing every moment of the day then leave now. Just know you will permanently break her into pieces. Because she will break into pieces without you and be a shadow of the person she is now. Jane doesn't commit herself to people easily. When she does there is something special about them. However, when she loves someone…she gives everything." Tommy said relaxing his hold on the young woman. He needed to make sure Maura was committed. Sometimes he couldn't tell what she was thinking. He needed to know that she would stay. Maura had the power that the Hoyts and Eric Leonard's of the world didn't. She had the power to actually kill Jane with her words and feelings.

"I am not leaving her. I would die first." Maura sagged forward as Tommy caught her. He lowered her onto the couch sitting next to her. "I just want her to take care of herself. I need her so bad it scares me. I have never needed someone this bad before. I have no barriers or walls to prevent myself from getting hurt. Your sister just blows through all of them." Tommy chuckled softly.

"Yeah, she always does that." Tommy said. Maura looked at this complex young man. Jane had such hope for him, but never cut him any slack. Jane was so afraid he would end up back in jail. The detective knew she couldn't stop Tommy from making mistakes, but Maura knew it was a fear of Jane's. Long nights of talking about family, childhood, and men had opened that door.

"I hope she asks me again Tommy. I was a fool. I miss her so bad. I miss Jane and me together." Maura whispered. Tommy pulled Maura into a hug. Maura never knew when she slipped into sleep. Tommy was much like his sister in caring for others. He gently laid Maura down on the couch. He placed a pillow under her head and covered her with the blanket. He kissed her head much like Jane would then wandered outside the room. Laura Talas, his bodyguard waited for him with one of the other AKON guards.

"Everything okay?" Laura asked hearing the arguing from outside the door. Tommy nodded.

"I should have been a damn counselor. I seem to be doing it a lot these days. Come on, let's go." Tommy motioned to Laura as they headed out.

The bullpen was a flurry of activity. The entire homicide unit was looking into the gassings, bombings, and Eric Leonards' life. The case boards timeline was filled while a list of possible suspects were taped up with information below them. Hours of video tape was being reviewed and witness statements were being gleaned for any information. Coffee cups with cold coffee littered desks.

"Korsak, we have video of Jason Lemon leaving the area in the business district that the gas and bomb were planted." Frost called over to Korsak. Korsak carried his coffee as he walked toward Frost. They heard Frankie swear.

"OH Geeze! How could we be so stupid?" Frankie said as he looked through a stack of witness statements. Agent James walked over and sat in the chair next to him. She looked haggard and worn with not having much sleep.

"What is it?" Frankie handed her the witness statement. He leaned back stretching his back trying to get the kinks out of it. She read through it and looked back up.

"So? It basically says that this person was coming from the coffee shop were they had been drinking a mocha and doing computer work when they saw everyone collapse. So what?" Agent James said not getting it.

"No keep reading page two and look at the name on the witness statement!" Frankie said miserably as he leaned forward turning the page for her... Agent James looked back down reading and then shook her head.

"Damn! He was there and interviewed by the officers." Agent James began reading the witness statement. "Geeze he basically gave major evidence for the crime scene and the officer who took the report noted that he informed an agent on the scene, but was ignored." Agent Tipton came over and looked over Agent James shoulder. He looked as bad as the rest of the detectives.

"I got one better for you all. I have the psyche evaluation from Boston Mass. that Leonard Industries used to fire Mr. Lemon. It seems he identified Eric as a son. The psychologist who was attending Mr. Lemon stated and I quote, "Jason Lemon sees himself as the father that Eric Leonard never felt he had in life. He has taken Eric under his wing to train him in the areas he feels his parent is lacking. This need from Jason life for a child and from Eric's for a father figure to look up to will create an emotional barrier that could become unrepairable. Eric's current psychological problems including his oppositional defiance lead me to believe in my professional opinion this is an unhealthy relationship and should be severed as quickly as possible signed Doctor Amos Jacobs." Frost said as he read the medical report from his computer. "I have an address and I have a current picture." Frost pulled the images up on the overhead screen so all could see it. Information was added quickly to the case board.

"I want a BOLO put out on Jason Lemon. Notify SWAT commander we need to organize a strike within the hour. Have him report to Lt. Cavanaugh's office immediately. I don't want this guy spooked. I want to catch him without another explosion. Crowe stepped into the bull pen at that moment. He had just arrived from the hospital. He was shaking his head and chuckling.

"What's going on Crowe?" Frankie asked curious as to why the detective was amused.

"I just came from the hospital. Your sister is being held in duress by Doctor Isles." Crowe said chortling.

"What do you mean duress?" Frankie asked now wanting to know what Jane had done.

"Seems your sister tried to take a walk from her room. Your mom was holding her down when Doctor Isles stepped into the room. Doctor Isles had her restrained for her own good." Crowe chortled as Frankie, Frost, and Korsak's eyes about bulged out of her head. "Frankie, remind me never to cross Doctor Isles or call her Queen of the Dead again. That woman is wicked when she is mad and she was mad when I quickly backed out of the room." Crowe sat down in his chair and began reading over some paperwork. When he looked up he saw Frankie texting. "What are you doing?"

"Texting Tommy to get a picture! You know how often Jane uses stuff like this on us?" Frankie sent the text as they waited for the SWAT commander to arrive. He watched as Agent Tipton notified the FBI tactical response team. Frankie's phone beeped and he looked down at the incoming message.

"No way. Maura almost took my head off just now. You can take the chance. Even AKON security is scared of her right now." Tommy's text read. Frankie shook his head. Jane knew better than to hack Maura off.

The x-ray machine hummed as Doctor Reynolds watched from inside the protective barrier. Jane's breathing was more labored. He was becoming more concerned. He waited as the technician developed the x-rays. He watched the team roll Jane back toward her room. Maura was going to have one upset detective when she woke. Jerry heard the technician call him name as he came back from his thoughts.

"I think we have a problem. See here Dr. Reynolds. The rib has fractured and is pressing against one of her lungs. It has most likely punctured a section of the lung." The technician was saying.

"Damn, I thought something else was wrong. Schedule the OR immediately. I need to get it back into place and repair the damage to the lung." Dr. Reynolds grabbed the x-rays. Now he needed to explain to Maura and Angela.

Jason Lemon watched the hospital entryway. There had been a new level of security placed on the hospital with the detective there. News vans were outside attempting to get any sound bite they could about the injured detective. There was just too much security for him to get to the detective. Perhaps a different target someone close to the detective would be a perfect revenge. Yes, someone who was important to the detective. Just them Tommy Rizzoli stepped out of the hospital with his AKON bodyguard. Jason Lemon watched from his car. He opened a folder at his side leafing through it and finding a picture of the young man. Tommy Rizzoli would be perfect. The brother of the detective would be a perfect substitute.


	22. Chapter 22

**Glazed Feelings **

**Part 22**

**Rizzoli and Isles are the property of TNT and Tess Gerritson. I am just borrowing them to create angry fanfics readers who want to skewer this writer for long drawn out drama after soft gentle Rizzles. *sigh* Going back to reading about the coming pandemic. Strangely it is pretty interesting how creatures of habit we are in it.**

"Soon Jane, you will know the pain I feel. Soon," Jason whispered as he parked down the street from Maura's residence. The former Leonard employee watched as Tommy Rizzoli pulled up to Maura's house. Rizzoli and Lauren Talas exited the car and walked through the gated entrance to the Gate House. Jason waited a few momentsthen got out of his car hooking the side satchel over his shoulder. He slowly made his way through the gate making sure he clicked it back into place softly. He then moved around to the side of the house watching through a side window waiting for Tommy to move through the living area toward where the gas canister was set.

"So you were in Jail for how long?" Lauren Talas asked as Tommy grabbed a glass from the kitchen cabinet.

"Juice?" Tommy asked as he waited deciding on whether to talk with her. Lauren shook her head. Tommy filled his glass and put the orange juice jug back in the refrigerator. "Five years. I got out on good behavior. I am on probation for another three years. If I am good then they will allow me to come off probation at the end of a year and a half."

"How'd it happen?" Lauren asked even though she knew. It was standard procedure to know their clients back ground before actively guarding them.

"Stupidity and youth." Tommy said sighing. "I was at a party with friends and had too much to drink. I could never really control how much I drank. I love alcohol too much. I got in a car figured it was only five blocks home and I could make it. I never saw the Father in the crosswalk." Tommy whispered. "It was dark. I was drunk and shouldn't have been driving. I ruined my life that night. I have been trying to get it back ever since then." Tommy said staring into space. Lauren moved closer laying a hand on his hand resting on the counter.

"You will do it. You will get it back." Lauren said softly. Tommy looked up and shook his head angrily.

"I don't deserve it. I can't trust myself. Hell, even my sister doesn't trust me." Tommy yanked his hand away and placed the glass on the counter. "I'm going to get a change of clothes and a shower." Tommy moved toward the hallway. Lauren wanted to say something, but didn't know quite what to say. Jason watched from outside as Tommy headed into the hallway and tripped the rigged line. He watched as the Lauren Talas came running to help the eldest Rizzoli. Tommy turned a surprised look crossing his face. He faltered in mid step and fell. Lauren Talas fell to the floor in mid run sliding into the wall as she came to a rest. Jason smiled as he thought to himself how easy people were to manipulate. He pulled out the gas mask from the side pack he carried and entered through the front door. He stepped past Lauren Talas and bent over Tommy Rizzoli. He leaned forward to check Tommy's pulse and jerked back when a gun was jammed to the back of his head.

"Now, you didn't think we were that stupid did you?" Lauren Talas' controlled, even voice resounded behind him. "Now you be a good boy and put your hands up." Just then Frost and Korsak came through the front. Lauren's attention never wavered from Jason Lemon even as he began to move. , I never miss," Lauren said. Jason stopped in mid motion. Frost moved past Lauren cuffing Jason. Tommy was up and on Jason in seconds.

"You son of a bitch! You hurt my sister. You would have hurt my friends and family." Tommy roared as he threw Jason against the wall. He slowly began squeezing the life out of him with his arm over his throat pressing hard. Frost tried to remove him, but couldn't budge him. Korsak was there in seconds.

"Tommy, Jane wouldn't want this. She wouldn't want you to sacrifice your life for this scum. Let us have him Tommy. Don't do this you are not like him." Korsak said firmly pulling on Tommy. Tommy released Jason Lemon shoving him one last time hard against the wall. The eldest Rizzoli then stormed out into the yard as Frost and Korsak took charge. Laura Talas followed him into the yard.

"Jason Lemon you have a right to remain silent. Anything you say can be used against you. You have the right to have an attorney present now and during any future questioning. If you cannot afford an attorney one will be appointed for you. Do you understand these rights?" Frost asked as Jason Lemon struggled against the handcuffs.

"She won't make it you know." Jason Lemon said as he leaned against the wall and struggled to catch his breath.

"Who?" Korsak asked curiously. Jason looked up from where he was bent over his hands braced on his knees.

"Why, your Detective Rizzoli? She's a weak woman, severely injured, and without hope. She is going to die." Jason chuckled and attempted to take a breath. The next thing he knew Frost had him slammed against the wall. Frost stared him directly in the eyes causing Jason to look away.

"You don't know Jane Rizzoli. She's stronger than you were or ever will be. You messed with the wrong woman this time." Frost pulled him off the wall and shoved him toward the uniforms that had arrived at the door. Agent Tipton came through about that time. "That one needs special handling." Frost indicated to the uniforms as they took him away. Agent James accompanied them from where she waited outside the door.

"Plan worked like a charm, though it did take some convincing for Tommy to agree. Good thing we made the second sweep through all the homes." Korsak said looking around. Agent Tipton and Korsak had found the device Jason had set after the first sweep. They had bomb squad remove it. Then they had replaced it with a dummy device.

"Thank God we got him. Let's get him booked and celebrate. I think we will take him off your hands pretty quickly if that is okay with you all?" Agent Tipton said thankful it was finally over. Frost nodded and sat down for a minute. His phone rang suddenly.

"As long as you promise to stick him somewhere so dark and deep Jane will never have to worry about him." Korsak said as he watched Agent Tipton.

"I think I can promise that for you. Jason Lemon is going to be held as a terrorist. I can almost assure you he will never see the light of day." Agent Tipton stated firmly. Frost cleared his voice as he closed his phone interrupting the two agents.

"We need to get to the hospital. Jane's in surgery. There have been complications." Frost said his voice cracking. Korsak swore under his breath as all three turned to leave. Outside Lauren Talas watched as Tommy Rizzoli struggled with his anger. She never heard Frankie approach until he stood next to her. Frankie watched his brother struggle and went to his rescue for the first time in a long time.

"Jane would be proud of you. The plan went off without a hitch. You're a good man Tommy." Frankie said stepping near, but not touching his brother.

"Dammit I almost killed him Frankie." Tommy yelled rounding on his brother. "Don't you understand I almost killed him? I am no good." Now Frankie did move grabbing his brother's shoulders forcing him to hear and look at him.

"Wrong! You could have killed him Tommy, but you didn't. You stopped. You saw reason. You are not bad. Jane knows this. I know this. Remember, almost doesn't count." Frankie said with surety. Tommy tried to pull away. "No, you know I am right. Jane is right."

"Then why doesn't she trust me? Why is she always worried about me?" Tommy yelled. Frankie let out a sigh.

"Tommy, you won't trust yourself. You have even told me that you can't forgive yourself. The priest has even forgiven you Tommy. Jane knows you have to forgive yourself before you can ever trust yourself or others trust you. She will always watch over you and worry. She's your sister." Frankie said pulling his brother into a bear hug. Tommy broke down on his brother's shoulder. God, how could he forgive himself? He had run a priest down.

"I'll try." Tommy said pulling himself together. He pulled out of his brother's hug. "But I did want to kill him Tommy for the hurt and pain he caused Jane and Maura. For what he did to all of us in hurting Jane." Frankie looked his brother in the eyes and knew he wasn't lying.

"Me too." Frankie said firmly. Both brothers nodded in ascent to some deeper language between each other. Frost and Korsak came out of the house preceded by Agent Tipton. Lauren Talas turned feeling the sense of urgency just as her phone went off. She looked down to see AKON sending her an emergency text: "Get Tommy Rizzoli to Mass General right away. Code red."

"We have to get to the hospital. Jane's in surgery and there has been complications." Korsak called to the two brothers. They both turned as fears icy fingers gripped their hearts. They couldn't lose Jane now that they had caught Jason. Now that they had come so far. They all moved to the waiting squad cars hoping they would get to Boston Mass Hospital in time. Hoping Jane would hold on one more time. 


	23. Chapter 23

**Glazed Feelings **

**Part 23**

**Rizzoli and Isles are the property of TNT and Tess Gerritson. I am just borrowing them for…well…for…shhhh…a little angst! Yes, more angst. But I promise there is soft mushy stuff on the horizon and I am not talking about Jane's hospital oatmeal. As always please review your humble bard, Deanlu.**

There are some that say patients in surgery hear nothing, but dream the sleep of the undead. Jane Rizzoli would have to disagree with them. Right now for instance she could see herself on the operating table. The doctors and nurses moved rapidly around her unconscious body as they struggled to get her back. She felt weightless and pain free for the first time in her life.

"Patients' blood pressure is falling. Patient is crashing." The anesthesiologist called as he worked to find a pulse.

"Beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep" The sound of the heart monitor rang out over the OR. Nurses drew syringes full of medication to push Jane's heart into working.

"Defibrillator! Come on Jane. Epinephrine quickly." Dr. Reynolds called out. Jane was injected. "Clear!" An electrical shock was administered. The sound of the flat dead beat rang out still. Jane looked away from her body and was suddenly in the waiting room. Frankie sat talking with her ma and glancing toward the end of the hall where the operating room was located. Tommy was holding Maura whispering encouragement. Jane looked at Maura closely. She looked so small and fragile. Exhaustion painted lines in her face and too many cups of coffee were causing her hands to shake. Maura wrung her hands together in worry. Jane heard the barest of whispers, "Don't leave me Jane. Please don't leave me alone." Maura's plea squeezed Jane's heart. No she wouldn't leave Maura. Jane had so much she wanted to experience with her. She wouldn't let her live this life alone. Jane felt a pull that was hard and painful. She let herself be wrenched back to the table. Jane could only compare it with the rafting trip she had taken to New Hampshire when she was sixteen. It was like being slammed into the rocks on a raging river. Suddenly, darkness overwhelmed her as she sunk into the abyss.

"Again, up 10. Clear!" The sound of the shock reverberated through the operating room. "We have irregular beat Ventricular fibrillation, shock again." The sound of another shock and then a steady beat began to ring out. Dr. Reynolds let out a slow breath. "Okay ladies and gentlemen let's get this patient closed and into ICU." Dr. Reynolds and the operating team finished the surgery. Jane's rib was back in place and the lung repaired. The surgery had been a success except for the very end when Jane had arrested. Jerry now sat looking at his hands outside the OR as he took a deep breath again. It had been close. Jane's body was exhausted and just wanted to give up. The detectives indomitable will was what had saved the day. Maura didn't know how lucky she was to have Jane or maybe the ME did know. Jerry rose and headed to inform the family.

He came out of the OR and watched as Tommy Rizzoli shook Maura gently. Maura rose when she saw Jerry approach as did the other inhabitants of the waiting room.

"Jerry, how is Jane?" Jerry grabbed Maura's hands. The serious look on his face was scaring Maura.

"The rib and lung are repaired. Jane will be allowed to wake naturally. Maura I need you to sit down a minute." Maura had begun to shake when Jerry asked her to sit down. She attempted to steel herself for what Jerry had to say. They moved to the couch while everyone gathered around. Jerry sat in the chair next to the couch while Maura and Angela sat on the couch. Tommy and Frankie sat either on the arm or the coffee table. Korsak and Frost hung nearby listening. "Things in surgery went well until the end. Jane went into cardiac arrest." Angela gasped as Maura began to feel light headed. "We got her back. She will recover."

"How long? How long was she gone?" Maura's choked voice asked. She knew that if Jane had been gone more than five minutes that brain damage could have occurred.

"Three minutes. We believe she will be fine." Maura nodded as tears ran down her face. Tommy reached over and pulled her into a hug.

"She's stronger than this Maura. She's still here. She's not going to leave you." Maura nodded into Tommy's shoulder. Angela leaned over and pulled Maura into her arms.

"When can we see her?" Tommy asked Dr. Reynolds. Jerry looked over at Tommy.

"In a couple of hours Tommy. Why don't you all get something to eat? I will send the nurse out in about two hours when Jane's ready." Jerry said as he rose to head to the ICU.

"Jerry…Thank you." Maura said softly. The surgeon stepped back and hugged his friend.

"Like I said before, I can't wait to have a slow quiet night with you two and Albert. Stay strong Maura." Jerry stepped away and headed to ICU to check on his special patient.

"She will Jerry. She has her family around her." Angela said softly. "Come on, let's get something to eat." Maura was about to protest, but Angela pulled her up and made her walk with her. Angela had her arms wrapped in Maura's as they were walking down the hallway. The boys were chatting and following along.

"Maura!" A familiar voice called out to the young woman. Maura turned to see her mother hobbling down the hall on her cane.

"Mother? What are you doing here?" Angela released Maura as Constance wrapped her arms around Maura.

"I couldn't stay away when you told me what was going on. I knew I needed to be here with you…with all of you." Constance said as she looked up at everyone. Maura broke down. It was just too overwhelming. Constance wrapped her daughter in a hug. "Shh… I'm here for you. Shh…" Frankie and the others proceeded to the cafeteria while Tommy and Angela hung close by making sure Maura was okay. Tommy had assumed Jane's role while his sister was ill. Angela just smiled thankful Constance was here for a change. "Where were we headed before I stopped you?" Constance asked as her daughter struggled to get herself under control.

"We were headed down to the cafeteria. It's been a while since we have eaten and Jane won't be available for two hours. Why don't you come along? I don't believe Maura has told us much about you." Tommy said taking the older woman by the arm while Angela reasserted her hold on Maura escorting them to the cafeteria.

In ICU Nurse Floren watched Jane's vitals. They had begun to pick up as she woke. Jane's eyes fluttered open as she tried to orientate what she was seeing with her lack thoughts. She closed her eyes again falling into a snooze. The nurse watched her vitals strengthen. The anesthesia was wearing off well. So far no complications were coming from the drugs used to put Jane to sleep for the surgery. Nurse Floren continued to watch and monitor the patient. Jane began to move a little more grimacing in pain.

"Jane, you are in ICU. You had surgery to repair a broken rib. How are you feeling?" Nurse Floren asked as she bathed Jane's sweaty brow. There was definitely a mild fever, but so far okay.

"Sick" Jane said brokenly. Nurse Floren understood. Quickly she moved a small tray to in front of the patient. Anesthesia did cause some patients to be ill. Nurse Floren worked with Jane as she continued waking. "Water please." Nurse Floren gave Jane a few ice chips.

"Just rest, there is no rush." Nurse Floren said softly. Jane's eyes fluttered shut again.

Meanwhile, in the cafeteria Jane's friends and family were laughing at the stories being related about Jane and Maura as children.

"I am telling you Maura was a sweet child, however, there was this one time when she wanted to make a batch of cookies when I was sick. The cook had gone out of the kitchen for her break. Maura snuck into the kitchen. She got out the bowls, mixing spoons, eggs, and oil. The flour however, was another matter. Cook kept it on the top shelf near the stove. Maura started stacking items to reach it. She had just got her fingers on the canister when cook came in the kitchen and let out a holler. Maura and the flour came tumbling to the floor." Maura was blushing profusely over the story. She had been so embarrassed at the time and the verbal lashing she had gotten afterwards from the cook kept her out of the kitchen for a month. "She was so cute covered in flour. I even took a picture. Remind me to show it to everyone over Sunday dinner."

"Mother, I don't think that the Rizzoli's would want to see that picture." Maura didn't like the way Tommy and Frankie's eyes were glittering with mischief.

"OH you are so wrong Maura." Frankie said laughing at the picture in his mind of a little blonde haired girl with curls covered in flour on the kitchen floor. Frost and Korsak laughed deeply as Angela smiled at Maura's embarrassment.

"Have I ever told you about Jane and the pig?" Angela said chuckling. Now Maura's embarrassment changed to curiosity.

"No, I don't think I have ever heard that story." Maura responded inquisitively. Tommy and Frankie were shaking their heads giggling uncontrollably like two school girls.

"Ma, Jane will be so mad if you tell that story." Frankie said as Tommy ribbed his brother with his elbow not wanting him to prevent the story from being told. It was one of his favorite memories of his sister.

"Now Jane knows I only tell it in love. Jane had a Papa and Nana she used to spend her summers with outside of Boston in the country. He owned a farm and raised a few crops. Well, he also raised animals like horses, cows, chickens, ducks, geese and pigs. Well, this rooster, Rudy that Papa had was a mean animal. He liked to peck anyone around the farm, but papa kept him because he was good for the hens. Well, one summer when Jane was six she went to stay with Papa and Nana. Seems her and the rooster were at odds from the beginning. Well, Papa said about mid stay Jane got fed up with the rooster. The rooster had trapped her near the hog pen. Jane hopped over the pen fence to escape Rudy. Well, Rudy watched Jane inside and then strutted away like he was the King of the world. Jane got mad. She grabbed a nearby rope and burlap sack. She tied the rope around the pig's neck and led it out of the pen. She then got the sack ready, jumped on the back of the pig, and smacked its rear. Well, that pig took off like a shot right toward Rudy the rooster. Jane put the rope in her mouth and when the pig came up next to the rooster she jumped off bagging old Rudy! She walked around a good hour parading her catch before the other animals until papa caught her. He released Rudy and then scolded Jane. Jane didn't care because Rudy stopped bothering her after that." Everyone was laughing. Maura had this picture in her mind of a young Jane riding on the back of the pig her hair wildly flowing behind her with that determined look she had. That was Jane. She never let fear keep her down. Dr. Reynolds entered the cafeteria. He walked toward Maura and the group. They were easy to find with all the laughing.

"Maura, Jane's ready for you if you and Angela want to see her?" Jerry asked knowing there was no way Maura could be kept from Jane. The ladies rose following Dr. Reynolds. Korsak and Frost looked at each other.

"Ya know Jane has this huge propensity for injury. Thank God it doesn't happen as often as it seems." Frost said softly. "I am really beginning to hate hospitals." Korsak nodded as he rose with the guys to follow where the women had gone.

"Angela?" Maura said as she watched her come out of ICU. Angela just shook her head covering her face.

"I've got her Maura. Go and see Jane." Constance whispered to her daughter. Maura took one last look at Angela before entering ICU. The lights were dim in ICU as the whirr of machines and beeps from monitors echoed around her. She entered Jane's room. The humidified oxygen covered Jane's face while the monitors beeped away. An IV dripped nearby running into her left arm. Nurse Floren was in the room tending to the burns from where Jane had been shocked repeatedly. Maura came over and observed taking on a clinical look.

"She is doing well. She should be out of here in a few hours. Dr. Reynolds was surprised on how fast she is recovering. She has been in and out of sleep just so you know." Nurse Floren said softly. Maura closed her eyes for a moment and then moved to the bottom of the bed. She picked up the chart and read. When she finished she set the chart down and took a deep breath. It was bad, but it could have been worse. She moved back up to Jane's side and moved her hair off her face. Nurse Floren wrote something on the chart and then left. Maura took Jane's hand and leaned forward kissing her forehead.

"Love you Jane." Maura whispered.

"You too." Jane's mumbled response through the oxygen mask responded. Maura's hand was gripped firmly and then released as Jane slipped into unconsciousness again. Maura leaned her forehead against Jane's as tears of relief slipped down her cheeks onto to the woman in the bed.


	24. Chapter 24

**Glazed Feelings**

**Part 24**

**Rizzoli and Isles are the property of TNT and Tess Gerritson. I am just borrowing them for a little...well…I'm not sure what I am borrowing them for this time, but I am! Thank you all for reviewing and giving me more than 200 reviews. It is humbling and amazing creating this warm fuzzy ball of Joy inside of me. You all humble me; I will endeavor to remain true to those who have reviewed. Secondly, to answer whether I had planned this amazing story or not umm, yeah the first five chapters suddenly it took on a life of its own and led me to places that I could not believe. The song that Maura sings is Laura McKenna's **_**The Dark Night of the Soul**_** . Now on to why you're here.**

Maura sat next to Jane's bed softly caressing her face with one hand while holding her other hand. It was late, close to midnight. Maura had been sitting with Jane for hours since Angela had gone home for a break. Jane's breathing was even and slow. Her pallor was still sickly having not quite had time to recover from the surgeries deathly experience. Maura bathed Jane's brow of perspiration that accumulated from the fever. Maura was humming softly and singing when Tommy checked on her. He watched from the door listening to Maura's soft Soprano voice as it sang out a steady beat.

"_Upon a darkened night the flame of love was burning in my breast, and by a lantern bright I fled my house while all in quiet rest.__Shrouded by the night and by the secret stair I quickly fled. The veil concealed my eyes while all within lay quiet as the dead.__Oh night thou was my guide of night more loving than the rising sun. Oh night that joined the lover to the beloved one transforming each of them into the other." _ Maura hummed the next few lines and Tommy felt he recognized the tune. He watched as Jane stirred some only causing Maura to begin singing softly again. Jane settled back into sleep as Maura sang. "_Within my pounding heart which kept itself entirely for her. She fell into her sleep beneath the cedars all my love I gave from o'er the fortress walls the wind would her hair against her brow and with its smoothest hand caressed my every sense it would allow." _Tommy was completely entranced by Maura's singing. He never noticed Frankie step up behind him and watch Maura use her voice to heal the inner demons and pains Jane suffered. Both men watched as Maura finished humming the chorus and bathing Jane's sweaty brow. She then settled in the chair caressing Jane's arm and singing again_. "I lost myself to her and laid my face upon my lover's breast and care and grief grew dim as in the morning's mist became the light. There they dimmed amongst the lilies fair there they dimmed amongst the lilies fair there they dimmed amongst the lilies fair." _Maura continued to hum softlyeven as gentle tears fell. She stopped humming and pulled a tissue from the nearby box. She wiped each eye and her cheeks. "Rest Jane I will be back in a minute." Maura rose turning to find the boys staring at her. "Umm, I was just…well…"

"It's okay Maura. We know what you were doing." Frankie walked over and hugged her. "You are gonna make a great sister. Why don't you come with me and get some coffee. Tommy will watch for a while." Maura looked back to Jane.

"Yes, I think I need a short break. Take good care of Jane Tommy." Maura walked out with Frankie. Tommy watched where Maura had left with Frankie. He shook his head and went to sit next to Jane's bed.

"I swear Jane if you don't marry that woman Frankie and I will beat you. You have no idea what you have in Maura. I could only wish she would look at me the way she looks at you. No worries sis she is all yours. Just know Frankie and I am going to make sure you treat her right." Tommy said kissing his sister's hand. Time passes slowly when your loved one sleeps, but Tommy was good to Maura's word and watched over his sister.

In the cafeteria Frankie sat next to Maura at a table. Maura was staring off into space pensively. "Hey, talk to me. How are you?" Frankie asked Maura. Maura looked up shaking her head.

"Tired, worried, thankful, and completely lost." Maura responded softly.

"Lost?" Frankie asked curiously.

"Yes, lost. I have gone from being so angry and hurt by Jane to realizing I am utterly, hopelessly in love with her. On top of that she has almost died from pneumonia, been kidnapped, and then almost died again from the injuries she suffered. I feel like I am on a see-saw." Frankie reached over and pulled Maura into his side. She closed her eyes relaxing into the odd sideways hug.

"Did I ever tell you that Jane tried to talk me out of becoming a cop?" Frankie asked as Maura rested. The young woman glanced up at him and shook her head.

"I know your mother wanted her too. Jane had told her you needed to choose your own path." Frankie laughed at that remembering the conversation with Jane.

"Yeah, that's Jane." Frankie began massaging Maura's shoulders and back as he talked. "She came to me after I had submitted my application to the academy. She was mad that day. She was madder than hell. She yelled at me that mom had enough to worry about with Tommy in prison and Jane being a cop. She didn't need to worry about her other son dying in the line of duty." Maura pondered Frankie's words as she listened. Jane was always trying to fix things and people. She had anticipated Angela's request and went before her mother asked her too. Then why had she not told Angela she had tried.

"We must have argued for over an hour. Finally, I yelled at her don't I get choice? Aren't I allowed to become what I want just like you did Jane? She actually shut up after I said that. She got real quiet, closed her eyes pinching her nasal bone, and turned away. I told her, Jane I have to choose my own path. I watched her hands drop as she nodded. She turned around and hugged me. She told me I could do whatever I want. She would support me no matter what." Frankie looked down at Maura who was dozing off. "She did." Maura woke up and sat up.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to doze off." Frankie smiled and shook his head.

"Nah, you're entitled. Come on let's get back to Jane." Frankie helped Maura get up and they walked back arm in arm. "Maura, you never have to worry about Jane. She won't ever leave you."

"Frankie, you have one special sister." Maura said smiling up at him. Frankie looked down at her.

"Yep, just like she has one special girlfriend." Maura hugged the man as they walked back. Tommy gave up his seat when they arrived. Frankie and Tommy let Maura know they would be out in the waiting room and then departed.

"You know Jane you don't give those two enough credit. They are amazing men." Maura whispered as she took her place at Jane's side holding her hand and caressing her face with her fingers.

"You are an amazing woman." Jane's voice burred out. Maura looked up in shock. "Yeah, been awake for a while just didn't have much to say." Maura smiled. "So you going to marry Tommy or Frankie since you seem to like them lots." Maura was about to protest when she caught a look at the twinkle in Jane's eyes.

"Oh you, if you weren't so ill I would whack you." Maura said causing Jane to chuckle which brought on a coughing fit. Maura placed her hand against Jane's chest forgetting the burn from being shocked. "Easy, easy." Maura took her hand away suddenly worried she had hurt Jane. "Oh Jane, I'm sorry."

"Shhh, it's okay. I can't tell what part of me doesn't hurt." Jane said gripping the hand Maura still held. Maura made a decision. She leaned forward till she was close to Jane's face. She removed the humidified oxygen and kissed Jane's lips softly.

"Did that hurt?" Maura asked softly worry reflecting out of her hazel eyes.

"No" Jane said softly back. Maura leaned in kissing Jane a little longer this time.

"How about that?" Maura's husky voice resounded.

"No" Jane whispered back as warmth began to infuse her body. Maura leaned forward one last time deepening the kiss and then running her tongue along Jane's lip, before softly nipping Jane's red lips once again. She finished by rubbing their noses together and placing a soft kiss to her right cheek.

"How about that my love?" Maura asked leaning close exchanging breath with Jane. Jane's body was humming with energy and the pain had briefly ceded to the background.

"No, nothing you do could ever hurt my love." Jane whispered back reaching forward and pulling Maura against her chest. She felt the sting and pain from her burn, but the feeling of Maura against her made it all worth it. Slowly the pain receded as sleep took the detective once again. Maura felt when Jane's circadian rhythm ushered her into the land of dreams.

"Sleep Jane, I will watch over you." Maura whispered softly. The doctor pulled back placing one last kiss on Jane's face and sat back in the chair. Maura watched and waited next to Jane's bed through the night. The nurses came in to ICU in the wee hours of the morning to announce Jane would be moved back to her private room. It was quite an ordeal as they shooed Maura out of the room. They detached the monitors and IV lines from the wall transferring Jane to a gurney. Once secure and sure she was okay and the equipment was ready they moved out of ICU to the private room. Through it all Jane seemed to sleep the sleep of the dead. Though, she did grimace once when the orderly who was pushing went over a metal rise on the floor. She never opened her eyes and her respiration stayed the same.


	25. Chapter 25

**Glazed Feelings**

**Part 25**

**Rizzoli and Isles are the property of TNT and Tess Gerritson. I am just borrowing them for some fun. I have bad news. I won't be posting for four days. Have to escort some students to the state capital this weekend for a contest and then by the time I get back I know I will be drug out. Hopefully I will have another part for you on Tuesday. Sorry. Your humble bard, Deanlu.**

Angela arrived at the hospital just after nine in the morning. She felt refreshed after a good night's sleep and a wonderful shower. Frankie's call earlier in the morning that Jane had been moved back to the private room and was doing better had energized her. She had a slow breakfast taking time to read through her mail and answer family member's emails on Jane. Her goal now was to get Maura to head home for a break, even if it was only for a few hours. At least that was her goal until she stepped into Jane's room. There lay Maura sleeping soundly next to Jane's left side. She was snuggled into the detective's side with Jane's arm holding her tight in sleep. Angela glanced to the couch where Tommy lay sleeping soundly. Frankie had reported for duty at seven in the morning and then was sent home by Korsak to get some rest. Angela moved closer looking at Jane. She had more color and seemed to be breathing easier. Angela would be off of work today, but tomorrow she had to return. Life moved on even as the detective still wasn't quite out of danger health wise.

"Hey ma, when did you get here?" Tommy asked while running his hands over his face and sitting up.

"Just a few minutes ago I slept in later than I wanted, but I was tired. I love your sister, but her job is going to kill me from worry." Angela said softly so not to be heard by the two women.

"It will be okay mom. I think if Maura and Jane get on the right track again Jane will be more careful. She hates hurting Maura." Angela looked over at the two lovers. She wished she could protect them from all Angela knew they would encounter in the future, but life had a way of beating people down. Maybe it would give Jane and Maura a break for a while. Tommy looked at his watch. "Man it's late. I have to get going. I talked to my boss last night. He wants me to come in today. I have to go. Tell Jane and Maura I love them. I'll see you tonight." Tommy got up slipping on his shoes while his ma kissed him goodbye.

Angela moved over to the nearby curtains opening them some for a little light. She set the bag she brought down on the coffee table. She pulled out a flower arrangement. There would be a few others coming soon too. Then she pulled out the breakfast she had in a casserole warmer for Maura. A thermos of Peruvian Blue coffee came next. It was one of Maura's favorites. She pulled out Jane's Red Socks jersey. Angela pondered who would end up wearing it since lately Maura had it on all the time. Then she settled into the chair and began reading the latest soap opera dish. Nurses came in and out checking Jane's vitals. The couple never woke. Finally, close to eleven o'clock Jane stirred. She pressed the button not noticing her mother. Angela watched her daughter struggle with her ill health, but said nothing. She had been down this road too many times now.

"Jane, how can I help you?" said the sweet voice of Nurse Kelly.

"A little more pain than I like and I feel real hot." Jane called back to Nurse Kelly.

"I'll be right in Jane. Hang in there." Nurse Kelly answered.

"Okay." Jane was loath to move Maura. Jane could tell the ME hadn't slept well for a while. So Jane held still and bit her lower lip from the pain until Nurse Kelly arrived. Nurse Kelly took her temperature noting it was still high. Nurse Kelly inserted a syringe to the IV quickly administering the medication. Then she switched syringes and added another.

"That should begin working in just a few minutes Jane." Nurse Kelly said as she bathed her brow. The nurse could see Jane struggling with the pain. "Jane, on a scale of one to ten, how is your pain."

"An eight, but it wouldn't be so bad if the fever didn't make me feel so bad too." Jane said softly starting to feel the medication kick in to her system. Nurse Kelly nodded noting what Jane had said.

"I am having some Jell-O and broth brought in to you. Do you think you could get that down?" the nurse asked. Jane nodded. Nurse Kelly gave Jane some ice chips. Jane's eyes fluttered shut as she let the ice melt in her mouth. The nurse left in search of a level one tray. Angela came over and bathed Jane's brow. Jane's eyes opened and she smiled.

"Hi ma." Jane's voice cracked a little from the dry air.

"Hey baby." Angela leaned forward and kissed Jane on the forehead. "So how are you feeling? Not that I don't understand they might be asking that all the time and you're fed up with people asking. After all Carla Tulucci says that some people have a bad habit of always wanting to know." Jane smiled as her mom rambled on. It seemed some things were getting back to normal.

"Ma, I don't mind you asking. I feel better, not great, but better." Angela smiled at Jane with relief.

"Good, cause my baby girl needs to get well to catch the bad guys." Angela whispered. Jane smiled more realizing her mother was humoring her, but then her face darkened into a frown.

"Not for a while mom. I think I am going to use a lot of that vacation I built up." Jane said softly sounding defeated in a way. Angela studied Jane for a while. Unbeknownst to the two women Maura had woken and was listening.

"What's wrong? Why the sudden change of heart?" Now Angela was worried. Jane had always wanted to be a cop. Even when Jane had shot herself she had wanted to get back to work as soon as possible. A complaining Jane was a recovering Jane. But Jane wasn't complaining now. She was complying and that scared Angela more than anything. It was like the "Oomph" had gone out of her.

"Maybe I'm just tired and want to rest for a change. It hasn't been an easy few months ma." Jane said letting her eyes closed though she wasn't tired. She was in less pain, but not tired. Jane hoped her mother took the Q and dropped her questioning.

"Jane Rizzoli, I have known you since I gave birth to you and before when you were in my womb. You don't just change your mind without something deep and traumatic going on in that brain of yours. Spill!" Angela demanded softly in that voice only mothers had that commanded respect and gut spilling. Jane sighed opening her eyes.

"What good am I ma if I can't even protect myself? How do I justify doing my job if I am endangering anyone I am with? Frost and Korsak how can they trust me in the field? I had a lot of time to think while Eric chased me through the forest. I want a life with Maura. How can I give that to her if I am getting hurt all the time?" Jane asked painfully remembering how inadequate and weak Eric made her feel while pinned to the tree. Angela saw the cracks beginning to show in her daughter's armor. It would have been the most opportune time for her to take advantage of it, but she didn't. It wasn't who she was inside. She wanted her children to live out their dreams.

"You listen to me Jane. I am your mother and know you pretty well. I have known since you were in the fourth grade you were going to become a police officer. Ever since you toured that police station on field trip and Officer McGuiness spoke to you. You have a fire in your heart for helping the victims and locking the bad guys away. You were born with an innate sense of people's character. So don't lay here and make excuses. You're scared Jane. I know you are! I have seen it before. Trust me when I say you can protect yourself. You're a good detective. There are very few like you and we need them all. What would Maura say Jane?" Angela asked firmly demanding Jane take other's people's viewpoints into consideration.

"I know ma. Just let me think about it." Angela could see Jane was tiring. She kissed her head.

"Don't doubt yourself honey. You are a strong, brave, and amazing woman. Just give it time." Angela whispered as Jane fell into sleep. Maura was lying beside Jane in shock. She couldn't believe what Jane had said. She needed to think about this and find a way to show Jane this could not have been prevented no matter who it had happened too. Yes, careful planning was called for here. 


	26. Chapter 26

**Glazed Feelings**

**Part 26**

**Rizzoli and Isles are the property of TNT and Tess Gerritson. I am only borrowing them for a little angst. I'm sorry this has been delayed, but I have been wiped all this last week. I am sorry for the delay. I doubt anyone is still reading, but I have decided to continue this into several more chapters through Jane's recovery, a new mystery, and a twist of an ending. If you find it tiring, just let me know and I will complete. Your humble bard, Deanlu**

Maura gazed out the window of Jane's hospital room. It had been a few days since Jane's discussion with her mother over her work. The medical examiner had been in deep discussion with Korsak, Frost, and Frankie over her the concerns Jane had voiced. It had been agreed upon by all of them that the priority was Jane's recovery. Once they were sure she was on the road to health, then they would begin to tackle to insecurity problems. Interestingly enough, it was Crowe who had come in on the conversation one day and had come up with the idea of how to restore Jane's faith. Maura still remembered all of them being huddled around a conference table where AKON had set up at. Now that the immediate danger was over, most of the security specialists were gone except for bodyguards for Maura and Jane. It had been decided that until Jason Lemon was securely locked up in prison Maura and Jane would have a bodyguard. Lauren Talas would be kept on as well as Samuel Witiker. Both were well trained having come from a covert operation background. They could provide the security and discretion that was needed. Crowe had stated that Jane just needed to be placed in increasing situations of stress where she provided the protection of the person involved. Until she could finally recognize that she was capable of protecting them.

"In other words your saying let Jane take the lead?" Korsak said evenly as he looked at Crowe. Crowe nodded.

"I know we would be treating her like a rookie again, but I think if we treat it with respect and equality she would never recognize it as rookie encouragement. I also think one more thing needs to happen, but I am loath to mention it." Crowe said taking a deep breath and looking Maura in the eye. "She needs to see the department shrink or someone else she can trust. Jane bottles up a lot. She thinks we don't see it, but I do. She's not weaker for going to a psychiatrist. Hell, with all the shit she had gone through I am not sure how she is still sane. I think Maura she needs to see the shrink or she is going to drown soon." Maura let out a long breath and closed her eyes. She agreed with Crowe, but Jane would never do it. She would never share enough to unburden.

"She won't do it Crowe. She sees it as a weakness. Even if Maura was to ask in her best way there would be no way Jane would agree to it." Frankie was saying softly remembering another time. "I know Jane. She was the kid that stood up and defended me from four boys. Even when they had her on the ground beating the shit out of her she never cried, never called out. Afterwards, she wouldn't let me help her home. She placed a hand on my shoulder to protect me and walked right next to me projecting this sense of strength I had never seen before. Once home, even with ma screaming at her, she sat there and took it. She then went to her room and wouldn't let anyone help. I still remember looking in on her that night. The moon was showing through her window. Janie lay in the bed, her body covered in bruises, tears leaking down her cheek as she softly cried from the pain and humiliation. I've never forgot it. I never forgot either when dad took her to the hospital the next day. He came back and was shaking his head as he carried her inside the house. Once he laid her down he went to the kitchen to talk to mom. Jane had two broken ribs, four bruised ribs, and a dislocated elbow from where she had covered to try and protect herself. Doctor said she was lucky not to be half dead. She never cried and never talked to dad about it."

"Damn!" Frost said as he thought about his partner. "I'd follow her to hell and back. I already know she wears the biggest balls in this partnership." Frost sighed and hung his head. It was time for him to suck it up and start pulling his full weight as Jane's partner.

"Doc, I think you need to take Jane on that vacation. I think she needs to spend time recovering and sorting out her heart with you. Once she has that in place everything else will fall back to where it should be for her future. I agree with Crowe though, she needs to talk to someone." Korsak said staring at Maura. Maura nodded her ascent.

"I have the cabin fully stocked and ready to go. Jane will have time to recover and rest. However, I am going to start pulling some of this out of her. Maybe if we are alone and she can feel a little more in control everything will work out. Right now I need Jerry to find out why her fever remains high. The sepsis is gone, but Jane hasn't been able to shake the fever. I'm worried there is now a secondary infection somewhere. We will know more later today from the blood tests." Maura stretched and rose from the chair she was sitting in by Korsak. He grabbed her arm causing Maura to turn and look at him.

"I talked to Cavanaugh about you being gone. He said as long as you will review the autopsy notes and be available through skyping he will let you go. He feels real bad about everything. He says he should have listened from previous experience." Korsak said watching as Maura softened her gaze. She nodded.

"I can agree to that." Maura reached out placing a hand on the side of Vince's face. She noticed how worn out and exhausted the older detective looked right now. He seemed to have added several grey hairs, his eyes were not as attentive to conversations, and he seemed to be paler than usual. "Thank you Vince. Please go home and get some rest." Maura now noticed they all looked tired. It was as if this one case had sucked all the energy out of homicide leaving it a shell of its former self. "All of you. Go get some rest."

"I can't." Frost said firmly. "I have to be in court today for Jason Lemon's secondary hearing. His high flouting lawyer wants him out on bail. I mean to make sure that doesn't happen. Our friendly FBI agents plan to remove him from state custody using Homeland Security's authority. I want to make sure though he is dressed right for the journey and placed on the plane. I am not going to leave until it is in the air." Maura could tell Frost wasn't going to let any rookies screw it up this time. She was grateful to him for it. She had been on pins and needles since he had been arrested. Maura hugged Frost whispering a final note to him.

"Make sure he is trussed like a chicken please." Maura's soft words slid down Frost's hearing.

"With pleasure Maura, with pleasure." Frost said hugging the ME and leaving.

Now Maura stood gazing out the window waiting for Jane to wake. Samuel stepped inside the room helping Constance take a seat.

"Mom, you are supposed to be resting at my home." Maura said winking at Samuel as he left and then sitting next to her mother.

"Well, I can rest here as well as I can at home. Plus I have medical help nearby if needed." Constance said softly glancing toward the where the detective lay in the nearby bed. "What does Dr. Reynolds say about the ongoing fever?"

"It's Jane's body healing. There are no secondary infections. Her blood work is coming back normal. We just need to wait. The fever will leave eventually as Jane gets rest and past a certain point. He thinks maybe two or three more days. The worst is that today Jane has to get up for 20 minutes and move around. He is afraid she is too weak for it." Maura laid her head on her mother's shoulder. Worry was pushing her to her limits of strength these days. Constance for her part was thrilled Maura's head was on her shoulder. A few months ago this would have never happened had it not been for the resilient, stubborn detective that lay in the nearby bed. Jane had turned Constance's world upside down when she defended Maura. It had made Constance question everything after they had left. It had also finally opened the door onto the strict enclosed box that house the older woman's emotions. Constance had finally chucked the Beacon Hill snobbery book that she had used all her life and went with stark, plain emotion. She found out it was not too late to have a relationship with her daughter. So she jumped at the chance. Now months later, she could finally say she could see Maura for who she was not the image created for everyone on the outside.

"Do you know what struck me about Jane the first time I saw her?" Constance asked as she held her daughter. Maura looked up at her mother and shook her head.

"Her strength, it just seemed to emanate from her. It actually seemed to envelop anyone who was in her presence. I have seen many women darling. None have ever had a sense of strength that Jane does. The second thing that struck me was her protectiveness for others, mainly you. She knew I had injured you and did not back down when challenged. I like that in a woman. I like that in a partner for you. I knew then that when and if you got together Jane would be there through thick and thin." Soft tears dropping on Constance's wrist alerted her to her daughter's crying.

"God mother, I was so awful to her after Doyle was shot. I treated her like trash. I wanted her to hurt as badly as I did, so I handed her engagement ring she had given me back in the middle of the bullpen at work in front of all her co-workers. I was so cruel, so wicked. I know she loves me, but I think she will never take me back all the way." Maura's tears fell. Constance looked toward the bed where the detective lay seeing fully alert eyes and a finger placed across lips signaling the older woman to remain quiet. "It wasn't enough to just hand it back. I had to use words to thrust the knife deeper making sure she bleed as much as I felt I had and was bleeding. She will never forgive me truly." Tears continued to cascade down Maura's face as she buried her head into her mother's shoulder."

"You're wrong you know." The first words from Jane in a long while broke the emotional storm in the room causing Maura to look up into the deep, loving eyes of her detective. "I would and have forgiven you Maura. Completely. There are no words or actions you could do that would make me stop loving you. You never left my heart Maura, never vacated it completely. It's funny; I spent all my life building this wall trying to protect myself from love. Then you Maura, you just waltz right in and destroy it with just a touch. I'm still here love. I will always be here, even if you deny me. My offer still stands as it did that day I gave you the ring." Jane's eyes fluttered shut momentarily as her fever seemed to consume her a little. She felt cool hands on her face, soft lips meeting hers, and a rain of tears cascade onto her eyes.

"Oh God Jane." Maura's tears were without end. Months of holding back in anger and pain finally broke free. Jane's absolution of her sins had rent the chains around her heart, mind, body and soul. Never had Maura felt such emotional release it was dizzying and euphoric in nature. Jane's kiss pulled her in buoying her fragile emotional state grounding her in love and warmth. Jane broke the kiss pulling Maura into the bed and tucking her into her side.

"Mine" Jane whispered into Maura's ear as the doctor's warmth steeled over her making the pain cede again into the background and strengthen her body with energy she had not felt in days.

"Yes, yours…heart, mind, body and soul Jane Rizzoli…forever. I promise." Jane nodded kissing her lovers head while Constance looked on in amazement with tears flowing down her face. Images of what artists thought love was flowed through her mind, however, they all paled in comparison to what she had just seen, partaken in, and now stored in her memory for all time. This was love she realized as she watched the two young ladies care, encourage, and absolve one another's pains and mistakes.

**There will be a second section posted tonight. Enjoy this piece and my forgiveness on its tardiness. Your humble bard, Deanlu.**


	27. Chapter 27

**Glazed Feelings **

**Part 27**

**Rizzoli and Isles are the property of TNT and Tess Gerritson. I am only borrowing them to create angst, love, and good feelings. I am using the Patriot Act Law in here. If you have ever read it, it is a scary piece of legislation. Actually, the pieces they let you see. There are still some pieces that are blacked out. Enjoy, your humble bard, Deanlu.**

"The court will come to order. Docket number 56748-990 Jason Lemon versus the Commonwealth of Massachusetts. Let the record show that the defendant is present with his lawyer Jacob Marley, the state is represented by Caroline Danvers of the District Attorney's office and the Federal Bureau of Investigation by federal lawyer MACKABY. "The court reported stated. Judge Tillson looked over the room.

"Mr. Marley, you called this meeting. Please state your business for the accused." Judge Tillson said evenly.

"I am here for my clients bond to be reduced. We have evidence that he has mistakenly been accused by the state of crimes he did not commit." Marley stated glaring at the D.A.

"That is a blatant lie! I would surely state the defense is attempting to blind the court of the seriousness of the crimes Jason Lemon has committed." Caroline Danvers argued back.

"Ms. Danvers this is not some killer you're trying to convict. My client is an upstanding citizen who has never taken the law into his own hands." Marley fired back.

"Upstanding citizen? He was captured trying to kill one Tommy Rizzoli and one Lauren Talas." Danvers fired back. "He attempted to kill Detective Rizzoli, Detective Frost, and Detective Korsak of the Boston Homicide with explosive devices that he constructed."

"Assumed your honor. Are we not a nation who believes in innocence until proven guilty?" Marley fired back at Danvers. While Danvers and Marley argued the court bailiff brought a paper to the judge and whispered into his ear. Unbeknownest to the lawyers armed men had entered the court in black ops dress and were stationed at the door. Jason Lemon was so engrossed in the lawyer arguing he had noticed them. Agent Tipton sat near Detective Frost. Frost had noticed the men from his third row seat and just sat smiling. The bailiff stepped away and the judge banged his gavel.

"Enough!" Roared the judge. "It is a moot point now. Jason Lemon you are remanded to the custody of the Federal Bureau of Investigation on charges of being a terrorist. You will accompany these men. Court adjourned." The judge banged his gavel as Lemon and Marley's face dropped. The next thing Lemon knew he was being shoved against a wall, placed in chains around his ankles, neck and feet.

"You can't touch my client like that! I will sue you for this!" Marley yelled at the men in black ops outfits. Federal Lawyer Mackaby stepped between Marley and the black ops men.

"I suggest you quit your hollering or I will be obliged to slap a restraining order on you and your practice. " Mackaby stated in no uncertain terms.

"You can't do that! My client has rights under the Constitution." Marley argued back getting ready for a knock down drag out fight. Mackaby jumped into the lawyers face firing back at him.

"I would refer you to the Patriotic Act and remind you terrorists have no rights under the law. I would also remind you that the Federal Government can create enough trouble so that you never practice again. Do you understand me?" Mackay said in a low whisper.

He was then lifted up and carried out of the court room through a side door to a waiting black van. Frost accompanied Agent Tipton and Lawyer Mackaby to a waiting car.

"You promise me he will not come back to haunt Jane!" Frost asked as he gazed at the van through the front windshield.

"I can assure you ninety-nine percent that he will never get out again." Mackaby stated firmly.

"Not good enough. I deal with serial killers who flaunt that one percent and win. I need a hundred percent guarantee he will never escape and harm Jane!" Frost leaned forward into Mackaby's face. Mackaby stared at the detective for a long time.

"You have my word he will never see the light of day." Mackaby stated evenly. Frost gauged the man staring into his eyes. He nodded finding what he needed and went back to watching the van travel down the road in front of them. Frost watched as they pulled through a side gate and headed onto the tarmac where a jet was waiting for them.

"I have rights. You can't do this. I am a US citizen." Jason Lemon was shouting as he was escorted from the van. He had been stripped, placed in a red jumpsuit, the shackles were back in place, and a hood had been placed over his head.

"Gag him if he continues to argue. I'm not listening to that all the way to Dubai." Mackaby stated as he walked toward the plane following the black ops men. Once the plane was loaded and the door was up. Agent Tipton and Detective Frost watched it taxi and then take off.

"He really going to Dubai?" Frost asked Agent Tipton.

"Do you really want to know?" Agent Tipton asked Detective Frost.

"No, I just want this to be over." Frost said watching as the plane disappeared on the horizon.

"Come on, let's get a beer and you can tell me all about Detective Rizzoli's exploits. Her case files are interesting reading." Agent Tipton said as he climbed back in the car.

Thirty thousand feet above in a plane headed no one knew where…

"Jason Lemon, you are charged with Terrorism with intent to topple the US Government." Jason Lemon sat quietly in the airplane seat. He knew he was in deep trouble. "Your life is forfeit, your money is forfeit, and all that you knew is forfeit. I am a busy man Mr. Lemon. I have a deal for you. You tell me how you know this man from your time in the service," A picture was placed in front of Jason Lemon. "And I promise to make this all fall away. No more charges, no confinement, and you can go free." Jason couldn't believe what he was hearing.

"I want it in writing, now. I will tell you everything only after it is in writing." Mackaby placed a document on the table in front of Lemon. Lemon read it over and signed. Then for the next hour Jason Lemon told the Federal Attorney everything he knew about the gentlemen in the picture.

"Is that all you know?" The attorney asked. Jason shook his head.

"He has a small lockbox at the Boston Centralized banking center. He told me if he ever called me and said the Kings are moving I was to take the box and drop it in Southie at this address." Jason wrote the address down.

"Is that all?" The attorney asked again. Jason nodded yes.

"Now get these damn cuffs off of me." Mackaby read the statement through and took the information. He placed everything including the taped confession into his briefcase. Mackaby then signaled two of the men standing nearby.

"Thank you Mr. Lemon. You have been most helpful. Please escort Mr. Lemon to a place he can get some fresh air." The two men grabbed Lemon under the shoulders and hauled him to the back of the plane where a sealed off compartment was located.

Mackaby picked up the planes phone. "There will be a momentary release." He told the captain.

"The black ops men tethered themselves to the wall. They then hit a nearby red button on the wall. A door opened on the side of the plane. They began to release Jason Lemon.

"What's going on? What are you doing?" Lemon was yelling. Inside the plane Mackaby had lit a cigar as he listened to Jason Lemon's screams. "No! You can't! You can't do this! It's against the law. Noooooo!" Jason Lemon's voice fell silent. There was a small "Humph" as if a large door was closed. Then moments later the two black ops men entered removing their black ski masks.

"Mission complete. Subject eliminated." Federal Attorney handed each of the men a drink.

"Well done one less piece of scum to worry about." Mackaby stated as the plane flew on to Dubai for his meeting with others. Somewhere over the Atlantic the remnants of one Jason Lemon sank to the bottom of the ocean. Never to be heard of again.


	28. Chapter 28

**Glazed Feelings **

**Part 28**

**Rizzoli and Isles are the property of TNT and Tess Gerritson. I am borrowing them for a little angst and some love. Hope you all enjoy. Your humble bard, Deanlu.**

"Piece of cake, been doing it all my life." Jane said breathlessly as she concentrated on standing and breathing. The detective stood carefully with the help of the nurse and Maura taking her first steps since being brought in from Eric's wild torture fest. Sweat accumulated along her brow and shoulders as she walked with the aide of the two women. Jane moved around the room hesitantly as first. She felt weak and somewhat out of control. She knew she needed to get up and walking. The longer the detective lay immobile the greater the chance for relapse into pneumonia or a secondary infection.

"Come on Jane, you can do it. I'll catch you if you fall." Maura's gentle words encouraged. The detective smiled at her girlfriend and nodded. Jane was determined to get out of the hospital, but she felt so worn out. Everything took three times the energy. Jane had been up for about ten minutes having walked out to the nurses' station and now turned to return to her room. Her whole body was trembling with exertion. Sweat ran down her back as they moved slowly back to her room. Her feet were beginning to refuse to follow her commands. She stumbled at one point heading toward the floor. Maura arrested her fall by sliding in front of her in a flawless move to cushion her impact if it happened and using arms long toned from yoga to stop Jane in mid fall. The two women ended up eye to eye with Maura holding Jane.

"I told you I will catch you if you fall. Promise." The soft whisper flowed across Jane's face and down her ears burying itself deeply in the secret place the detective allowed only Maura. Maura kissed Jane softly squeezing her arm firmly where she held her securely to reassure her lover. Once the two broke apart the nurse was helping Jane stand as Maura assisted from her right side. They reached Jane's room, but Jane refused the bed instead angling for the chair. The nurse looked at her watch nodding in approval. The detective had made it twenty five minutes including the small fall.

"You did well detective. How about a sponge bath? I am sure the good doctor here would give you one." Jane smiled as her chest heaved more than normal from the exertion.

"Nurse Bryant can you bring a few things. I think I would like to wash Jane's hair and get her a change of clothes on." The doctor asked. Jane was relieved Maura had taken over. She closed her eyes leaning back in the chair allowing her heart rate and breathing to even out. She felt a cool rag bath her face, neck, and shoulders. Jane heard the nurse depart as the door closed.

"Sorry, didn't mean to fall. Just so weak I think I can handle it now if you want to go." Jane said. Strong fingers covered her lips causing the detective's eyes to flutter open.

"No, we are a team. You do not have to fear your weakness in my eyes Jane. I love you. You are and always will be strong in my eyes. This is just a bump in the road you will get over. I plan on being there every step of the way." Maura said as she continued to cool Jane down with the sponge. Nurse Bryant came back inside setting up a special chair in the shower to allow the doctor to clean Jane's hair. Maura gave Jane a few moments of rest as she set out a set of red sox PJ bottoms and button top. She then pulled out Jane's favorite shampoo and conditioner in the rest room. Nurse Bryant helped Jane move into the chair in the shower. Maura then took over being careful to remove the hospital gown. She placed a special plastic seal bandage over Jane's wound from the bullet on her shoulder and the surgery area on her lung. Nurse Bryant checked it and nodded her approval. Maura began the tender process of washing Jane's hair.

"Oh God Maura, this feels so good." Maura smiled laying a kiss on the detective's brow. She smelled the sweet scent of lavender and felt Jane's hand drifting up under her skirt.

"Behave detective. You're not ready for that yet." Maura chuckled against Jane's forehead. Jane smiled where her face rested against Maura's breasts. Her hands continued to wander taking in her girlfriend's voluptuous curves.

"I'm always ready for that doctor." Jane whispered back as she gave Maura's ass a small pinch. Maura pulled back with a gasp looking Jane directly in the eyes. The detective's brown eyes had become molten pools of desire.

"Jane, what am I going to do with you?" Maura asked shaking her head. Jane's husky voice answered the doctor causing a shiver to run down her spine.

"Anything you want." Maura sighed and shook her head. She tweaked the detective's nose.

"You are bad detective." She then began working on Jane's hair again as the detective chuckled.

"Always with you doctor, always with you." Jane declared with a smirk. Jane reveled in the one on one attention Maura was giving her. After months of bleak desolation it was like a lush, overflowing river of love flowing back into her life.

"I love you Jane. If I didn't know better I would say you're almost purring." Maura spoke lovingly. Maura washed her girlfriend's hair again and then set about conditioning it.

"You bring that out of me. I never have felt like this with anyone else Maur." Jane said relaxing from the gentle massage to her scalp. Once that was done, Maura gave Jane a quick sponge bath noticing the shiver bumps breaking out across the detective's body.

"Now who's not behaving doctor?" Jane asked as the sponge dragged across her nipple area. Maura just giggled and continued cleaning her lover. Nurse Bryant returned helping Maura remove the towel wrapped Jane out of the shower area. Quickly Maura set about drying, dressing, and removing the seals over Jane's wounds. Maura dressed Jane. She worked on Jane's hair combing and settling its wildness. Maura then began massaging Jane's head causing the detective to slip into a light doze. Maura then pulled out some lotion and began massaging Jane's arms and hands staying well away from her healing wounds and incisions. She reclined the chair where Jane was resting in and covered her with a light weight blanket. She moved to the end of the recliner and worked on Jane's calves and feet getting a tiny moan from the detective.

"Thank you Maura. This is the best I have felt in weeks." Jane said softly. Maura placed the lotion away. She came and sat on the arm of the recliner.

"You're welcome Jane." She checked the detective for fever and noticed she was cool to the touch. "How about something to eat and then a nap?" Maura asked as she gazed lovingly at Jane. The detective smiled yawning.

"What did you have in mind doctor?" Jane asked winking at her. Maura noticed Jane was still having difficulty breathing, but her color was better and with time her strength would return.

"I was thinking some of your mother's chicken soup. Nothing more." Maura said bringing a tray over the Jane and setting it in front of her. Jane ate while Maura talked about Tommy and Frankie. It was in the middle of this that Jane got a strange look on face and closed her eyes for a moment. "Jane, what's wrong?"

"It just occurred to me that through all of this I have never asked what happened to Eric?" Jane looked at Maura pointedly with the shadow of fear reflecting out. Maura rose from the couch next to Jane and knelt by the chair. She took her hand and spoke lovingly, firmly.

"He's dead Jane. No one is going to harm you. Your family and friends have made sure of it. Eric Leonard will never hurt you again." Maura rose kissing Jane deeply. The detective broke free taking a deep breath. For the first time since getting sick Jane did not cough.

"Promise?" Jane asked doubt showing through the detective's normally strong façade. Maura looked Jane in the eye.

"Promise!" Jane closed her eyes as a weight lifted from her shoulder she hadn't realized she was carrying and tears leaked down her cheeks. She felt Maura kissing away her tears and whispering words of encouragement. Once the detective had calmed again Maura cajoled her into finishing her soup. The medical examiner watched her lover. Jane definitely needed time now, time to heal even more though, Jane needed time to restore her soul and mind. Maura would make that happen. Perhaps, she could finally put some shadows to rest along the way.


	29. Chapter 29

**Glazed Feelings**

**Part 29**

**Rizzoli and Isles are the property of TNT and Tess Gerritson. I am just borrowing them to knit a certain detective back together again. Well, I am slowly working toward a healthy detective. Hope you enjoy the next piece here.**

"Tell me Jane why that scares you?" Doctor Fontaine asked. Jane sat in the chair in her room at the hospital bristling with frustration and anger.

"I…I don't want to fail Maura." Jane said leaning her head back closing her eyes attempting to pretend she had disappeared. This was not how she handled things. Doctor Fontaine was an outside psychologist Jane had agreed to see after arguing with Maura, Frankie, and then Korsak. Korsak and Maura's arguments had been the strongest. The department had made it mandatory for Jane see the BPD shrink or an outside one of her choosing for the next year. There were concerns that Jane had a hero complex that would get her killed. In reality, it had more to do with concerns that Jane had just experienced too much. Cavanaugh had told Korsak either Rizzoli did this or the department may resign her to a desk position for a long while. Korsak had agreed to take on Jane over it. Jane had eventually agreed, though begrudgingly for Korsak and Maura. Dr. Fontaine waited. She knew that there was more. "…again."

"Why do you say again Jane?" Dr. Fontaine asked. Dr. Fontaine was an older woman in her forties with salt and pepper short hair. She had a strong face that reminded you of those Dutch women that painters often portrayed in paintings from the 1800's. She was of medium height, athletic in nature. She had served in the military at one time and now walked with a cane. Most wouldn't know she had a brace on her right leg to help her. Jane struggled to bring the words out she wanted to say. She just didn't want that pain to come to the top again.

"Aaargh! How do you sit there and just listen? Why am I doing this?" Jane got up from the chair faltering for a minute. Her strength was slowly returning, but her body resisted her quick demands still. Dr. Fontaine grabbed Jane's arm steadying her. Jane closed her eyes as Eric Leonard's voice slithered into her mind…_"You're weak Jane. How are you going to protect Maura when you can't even take care of yourself? You're weak Jane. Weak! Its how I caught you so easily." Suddenly Jane could see Eric in front of her with the knife. His evil face was drawn into a snarl as he stepped closer with the knife glinting in the sun._

"Jane!" Jane's eyes flashed open as Dr. Fontaine's voice called forcefully to her. Jane looked around confused for a moment. Dr. Fontaine still steadied her with her hand. "Jane, what did you see?" The doctor's voice commanded.

"I saw…"Jane struggled as the word "weak" whispered through her mind "…nothing. Nothing doctor, I just had a moment of dizziness. I'm tired. Do you think we could stop for today?" Jane asked fervently hoping the good doctor would capitulate. Dr. Fontaine eyed Jane for a moment and then nodded when she knew she would get nothing more from her.

"Alright, we can stop for the day." Dr. Fontaine let Jane's arm go and watched as she walked to the bed collapsing. The doctor was loathed to leave Jane until Maura's return. "I spoke to your pulmonologist. He said that your breathing capacity is definitely improving after the last few days. You may be able to get out of here on Friday and go home." Jane perked up from where she lay in the bed.

"That would be good. I just want to go home. I am so tired of hospitals right now." Jane said tiredly. The young woman closed her eyes as sleep began to pull her down. Dr. Fontaine watched for a moment.

"Jane, I am leaving now. I will see you tomorrow at the same time." Dr. Fontaine watched as Jane nodded and rolled over. Dr. Fontaine lingered a moment longer watching the detective. She was worried about Jane's control on her mind. When Maura had engaged her she knew it was bad from the interview she had given the medical examiner. Then she had read Rizzoli's patient files the department had sent over with Jane's approval. There was a great deal for the department to be concerned about. The detective though had always found a way to deal with the trauma. Now though, there were pieces of the trauma's Jane had previously experienced leaking from their little compartments Jane had locked them away in and they had begun to blend together.

"Maura, hope you come back soon." Jane whispered. She was tired and wanted to sleep. But she didn't think she could now that her mind was active again. The Occupational Therapist had been by to help Jane through some strengthening exercises. Between the pulmonologist, OT, and psychologist Jane felt like she was being pummeled. She needed to get out of the hospital and back to her home. She needed to be able to relax. Jane felt soft hands wrap around her as a warm body snuggled close. "Mmmmmmm, I'm happy you are back." Jane said reveling in Maura's touch. Maura began a slow massage along Jane's shoulders feeling the tension from her session with Dr. Fontaine.

"I'm happy to be back too. How are you?" Maura asked softly nuzzling into Jane's neck. Jane was silent for a long while.

"Maura you know I would do anything for you? Right?" Jane asked softly. Maura brought her lips even to Jane's ear.

"Yes, Jane. I know. I feel very safe with you." Maura said softly bringing a soft smile to Jane's lips as the voice in her mind attempted to ruin the moment. "Do you know I would do everything and anything for you Jane? I will be here when you fall Jane. Not just physically, it's a promise emotionally and mentally. I love you. I won't have you thinking that love is temporary. I plan on making sure that doubt your feeling goes away forever. Do you understand?" Maura spoke softly and clearly making sure Jane heard each word. Jane closed her eyes and took a shaky breath.

"I love you Maura. I couldn't make it without you." Jane said turning in the ME's arms to face her. "I am totally, completely in love with you." Jane looked up at her girlfriend. "Be patient with me. This is not easy this time. It may take me a little longer to get back on my feet." Maura gazed into Jane's eyes. Her little chat with Dr. Fontaine had served her well in being able to help Jane right now.

"I am not going anywhere except to sleep with you." Maura said quietly. Maura saw the wariness in Jane's eyes when she said sleep. "Jane, he is dead. He cannot hurt you."

"My heart knows that, but my mind is having some trouble believing that Maur." Jane said softly.

"What does Dr. Fontaine say?" Maura asked softly kissing Jane on the forehead. Jane rolled her eyes and began to look away. Maura grabbed her chin and forced her to look at her. Jane sighed exasperatedly.

"It's hard Maura." Jane blurted out. "I'm only use to talking to you. Why can't it be you?" Jane asked plaintively.

"Because you're good at hiding things from me Jane. Especially if you think they will hurt me. Dr. Fontaine is someone you can tell anything to even if it would hurt me. She is not going to tell anyone. She can give you good advice and allow the demons that haunt you to become less threatening." Jane nodded her head as Maura moved her hair behind her ear. "I will be here all the way. You can run to me when it's too much. Okay?" Maura asked softly. Jane looked into Maura's eyes seeing that haunted look she got every once in a while.

"All right, but only if you see her too. You're hurting inside too. I know it. I can't fix everything Maura as much as I try. I need to know you are okay too. Agreed?" Jane asked looking at the shock in Maura's eyes. "Yes love, I know Hoyt still haunts you. I also know that Eric's torture of me haunts you too, not to mention all that happened at the warehouse. We do this together." Jane said hoping Maura went for it.

"Together Jane, Always." Maura said as she hugged the detective.


	30. Chapter 30

**Glazed Feelings**

**Part 30**

**Rizzoli and Isles are the property of TNT and Tess Gerritson. I am just borrowing them for a little fun. Well, it has been one of those weeks. I am happy that several of you have hung with this story. The next few chapters will deal strictly with Jane's recovery and a mystery she gets herself embroiled into soon. No, she will not be back at work. However, Jane's brain never stops working and as much as she wants to refuse her job because of fear her mind has other plans for her. As always your humble bard, Deanlu.**

**P.S. for those of you chomping at the bit on Rizzoli and Isles new season check out Third Season Preview number 13 on Youtube. It's a killer. I will tell you spoiler alert!**

Jane waited impatiently as the nurse rolled the wheelchair into the room. Doctor Reynolds had finally given the okay for her to go home today to say Jane was excited would be an understatement as her leg bounced nervously on the floor. She kept expecting her doctor to come through the door and tell her no, but the only person who came through the door was Maura.

"Ready to go home and then vacation with me?" Maura asked her voice reflecting the joy she was feeling with Jane coming home. Jane smiled as the nurse helped her into the wheelchair.

"Yeah, I don't know why I have to ride in this dang thing!" Jane groused as she looked at the nurse.

"Honey, if you wanna stay right here in that bed you just keep up your grousing. I'm sure a few more days wouldn't hurt." Nurse Braddock fired back at her. Jane snapped her mouth shut and looked toward the floor. She wasn't going to do anything to keep herself at the hospital. Maura giggled as Nurse Braddock wheeled Jane out with Maura following carrying Jane's bag. Once in the car Nurse Braddock took one last moment to slip in a comment to Jane.

"Now you know where we are in case you need more work." Nurse Braddock laughed as Jane grimaced.

"It'll be a cold day in he…" Jane began to say as Maura cut her off.

"Jane! Language!" Maura said emphatically even as Nurse Braddock laughed while closing the door to the car.

"Thank God, I thought I would never get out of there." Jane said watching the city pass by as Maura drove them home.

"Nor did I for a while." Maura said softly. Jane glanced over seeing the shadows flit across Maura's face. The detective took her girlfriend's hand giving it a gentle squeeze.

"I will not leave you Maur. I will always fight for us. I will always choose the hard way." Jane said softly. Maura pulled over at a city park they had come upon. She parked the car for a moment and turned the key off. Maura gripped the steering wheel getting her emotions under control until she felt Jane's strong arms wrap around her and pull her into a hug. "Let it go Maura, let it go." Maura cried softly clutching at the detective.

"Sorry, you must think I am just a cry baby since that is all I seem to be doing." Maura said between tears. Jane just hugged her closer gently rubbing her back.

"Nope, I do not. I think we have been through hell and back over the last few months. You and I have every right to break down and get out these emotions. I love you." Jane's voice burred against Maura's ear. "Come on, let's take a walk. I could use the sunshine." Maura was about to protest, but Jane's fingers covered her lips. "Just a short one it will help me start to build up stamina. It's a nice spring day, the snows gone, and I have my lover right next to me. Come on." Jane's eyes pleaded with Maura. Maura finally nodded. Both women got out of the car and wandered along the footpath in the park. Children played on the playground equipment, joggers passed by enjoying the warm spring air, and others laid on blankets reading books and listening to music. Boston's denizens had come out to enjoy the weather and remove the blues. Jane and Maura moved slower than normal allowing for Jane's recent illness and healing body. They walked for a while just enjoying each other's presence.

"Jane, are you serious about quitting the force?" Maura asked looking over at her girlfriend. Jane stared off into the park as they walked. The detective said nothing for a long while. Maura waited knowing Jane was weighing her words carefully.

"I don't know. I just know I need to make some changes before I go back." Jane stopped them both. She turned grabbing Maura's hands and looked her in the eyes. "I need time to figure out everything up here." Jane said gently tapping her head. "I also need some time to heal inside and out. One thing I don't need though is to wait on this." Jane reached into her pocket and pulled out the engagement ring Maura had given her back in the squad room. Jane had asked Frankie to retrieve it from the sock she had hidden it in in her Chester drawers a couple days ago. She had just been waiting for the right time. Maura gasped and began to tremble. "My offer still stands. Will you be my wife Maura through the good and bad, when I'm sick or you're sick, through all the crap and the joy cause I won't and don't want another after you. You are it for me. I figure we both know by now what we are getting into so there is no fairy tale dream that can shatter." The ring glinted in the sun as Maura stood hand over mouth, body trembling, and just said nothing. Jane waited for her. She knew all the things Maura had running through her mind right now. This wasn't like the first time. Now there were things between them that screamed caution and created a divide. Jane knew inside they could surmount them all. Now Maura needed to let her know she agreed.

"Jane…I…I'm scared." Maura said looking back into Jane's deep brown eyes. Jane nodded in understanding. "I know how much I have to lose now and it scares me this will happen again." Jane trembled a little in fear that she might have gauged Maura wrong. "Try as I might though I know I can't live without you. Yes, I do want to be your wife no matter where it leads, no matter how hard, I want you Jane Rizzoli because there is no one else for me either." Jane pulled Maura to her gently kissing her brow. She slipped the ring on her finger. It glinted like new in the sunlight as Jane pulled Maura in a slow, seductive kiss. When they broke apart Jane could see Maura smiling her own grin matching the medical examiners.

"How about we go home and get ready to leave tomorrow. I know I am in need of some serious cuddling right now." Jane said softly as she began to move. Maura stopped her with a tug and looked down at the ground. "What?"

"I already have us packed. I was wondering if you would like to go to lunch instead or pick up something and take it home." Maura asked. She needed to delay their arrival home just a little longer. Jane looked at Maura gauging her response. Something was definitely up.

"All right, how about we catch lunch at Luciano's? I think I could be persuaded to eat an entire meal." Maura looked up with surprise. Jane hadn't had much of an appetite since she had become ill and Dr. Reynolds was afraid of her continued weight loss. Maura was too, but also her physical muscle mass was dropping. Her body had literally started eating itself to make up for the lack of food.

"I think that sounds lovely." Maura wrapped her arms through Jane's and then headed back to the car. About a half hour later they arrived at Luciano's. Due to the hour they were whisked to a secluded table into the back that wasn't normally available. Luciano's owner came out to see his favorite detective and medical examiner.

"Jane" he said as he kissed her cheeks. "Maura" he announced as he kissed her cheeks too. "Sit, sit. Tell me how have you been? I have seen the news reports of what happened? Thank God you are all right." Mr. Luciano said as he sat with them. Enzo Luciano was a longtime friend of Jane Rizzoli. Several of his boys had attended school with her. Enzo had even entertained the thought of one of his boys marrying the brash detective one day, but it had never come about. Jane had remained a good customer until one day she had interrupted a robbery at the restaurant. She had caught the robber after shoving Enzo's eldest daughter to the side and taking the bullet meant for her. It had been a mild flesh wound, but Enzo never forgot. It had earned Jane Enzo's undying gratitude and friendship ever since. He motioned to several waiters who brought Jane's favorite buttery, garlic bread sticks. He had a bottle of red wine decanted for them. Maura began to object when Jane interrupted.

"No, just water for me Enzo. I have to be good for a couple of weeks yet maybe next week if the antibiotic finishes out." Jane said placing her hand over her wine glass.

"Jane, I know you're on medication, but a third of a glass won't hurt." He looked toward Maura who nodded her agreement. He poured a small amount for the detective and then some for the ME. He poured himself a glass and sat chatting with them for a while. He brought a La Caprese to the table consisting of vine ripen sliced tomatoes, homemade mozzarella, with basil, oregano, and olive oil. Jane took her time as she added ingredients to her body that had not been there in a while. It was light, flavorful and before the detective knew it Enzo, Maura, and she had finished the entire plate.

"So tell me, are you off for a while or going back right away?" Enzo asked as his son brought the next dish. Jane looked up smiling as she sipped her bottled Italian water.

"I'm off as well as Maura. We are going on vacation for a week or so." Jane said watching as their dishes were set before them. It was then that Enzo noticed Maura's engagement ring.

"Oh my goodness. Could this be?" He said grabbing Maura's hand suddenly and looking between the two women. Maura looked at Jane and Jane smiled. Enzo knew then for sure. "Yes! Children come and congratulate Jane and Maura. They are to be wed! Dinner is on me." Soon Jane and Maura were inundated with all of Luciano's children that were present. Congratulations were spread around and more wine was poured. Jane stayed safely with her water. Maura had switched to water though she accepted one more glass of wine. Maura's entrée was brought to the table as well as Jane's. Maura had chosen the Spaghetti del Podrino which consisted of spaghetti, julienned beets, escarole hearts, garlic, olive oil, crispy capers flavored with colatura. Jane was not adventurous as Maura. She had the Orecchiette, Broccoli e Salisiccia which consisted of Orecchiette with broccoli rabe, veal and pork sausage, garlic and olive oil. Though the meal looked heavy it actually filled the hole in Jane's stomach. She had finished only a third of the dish when she was done. Enzo was pleased. Maura looked down at her watch noticing that two hours had passed. Jane looked relaxed and sufficiently stuffed.

"I believe this will take care of the sweets for later." Enzo said as he returned to the table with dessert wrapped up. He then turned and looked at Jane. "Now you listen to me detective you be safe! There are those of us who would be devastated were you to be lost to us. Let the good doctor take care of you. Tenere al sicuro il tuo cuore" Jane smiled and nodded.

"Maura ne è proprietaria, e so che è sicuro." Jane spoke back. Enzo hugged her whispering to her once again.

"Che è come dovrebbe essere." Then Enzo was hugging Maura whispering to her.

"Tenere al sicuro il vostro cuore. Per esso è prezioso in natura." Enzo hugged her tightly. "You have chosen well."

"HO sempre. Non potrei vivere senza di lei." Maura returned and then released the older man as Jane came to take her hand.

"Goodbye my friends be safe until next time!" Enzo watched the couple head toward the door and then into their nearby car. As Maura drove away Jane smiled at the doctor and then asked her a question.

"What's going on that you had to keep checking your watch?" Jane asked as she yawned. Maura smiled and looked over at the detective. The detective looked rather like a cat who had enjoyed its day. Maura surmised though Jane would be a black panther and not a house cat. This sent a little trickle of desire through the doctor. Yes, need to keep my mind on other things.

"Nothing you need worry about. Just take a nap detective. I'll wake you when we are home." Maura said as Jane began to fall into a light doze. Jane smiled and spoke one last time.

"This better not be a surprise party Maura. You know how I hate those." Jane said as she finally dropped off to sleep. Maura chuckled softly.

"Oh, Jane I would never get between your mother and a party." Maura said as she continued down the road.

**Enzo Italian = Keep Safe your heart.**

**Jane Italian= Maura owns it, so I know it is safe.**

**Enzo Italian = That is as it should be.**

**Enzo Italian = Keep safe your heart. For it is precious in nature.**

**Maura's Italian = I always will. I could not live without her.**


	31. Chapter 31

**Glazed Feelings**

**Part 31**

**Rizzoli and Isles are the property of TNT and Tess Gerritson. I am just borrowing them for a little fun. Sorry this is late. It has been a tough week with one of my former students committing suicide. I ask for your patience and indulgence as we travel along with the story. **

Maura pulled into her garage and turned off the car. She sat for a moment while the garage door closed just gazing at Jane's face. She was reticent to wake her as she seemed so relaxed. Jane's facial features that for weeks had been tense with pain were now relaxed. In fact Maura thought that she could see the small girl Jane had once been. She smiled as she thought of the rambunctious youth Jane must have had. Many a night they had talked about their past with Jane sharing small glimpses of what it was like to grow up as the only girl Rizzoli. Maura shook her head smiling let the image fade as she took in the woman before her.

"Jane." Maura said softly running her hand along Jane's cheek. Jane's eyes fluttered open with confusion as Maura woke her. "We're home, let's get you inside." Jane leaned back into the seat stretching as Maura got out. Jane was tired and so out of it that the medical examiner had to help her from the car. They had gone to Maura's house as the ME worried that Jane was not ready for to climb the stairs to her third floor apartment. Jane was half asleep and leaning gently against her girlfriend. She allowed Maura to lead her into the house. She heard Joe Friday come running down the hallway yipping. Next a sharp command from Maura and Joe was soon walking next to her.

"Jane, I'm going to take you to the bedroom." Maura said softly. Jane opened her eyes briefly to see her mother, brothers, and partners sitting around a table for her. Jane closed her eyes and attempted to pull on reserves she always had inside. There were no reserves to draw on. Jane nodded allowing her body to take control of her decisions.

"Let me help." Angela said as she moved away from the table helping Maura move Jane to the bedroom. Maura noticed Jane was sweating a bit.

"Angela, can you get some water and a small glass of juice for me from the kitchen for Jane?" Angela nodded worried at how wore out Jane looked. After Angela left, Maura helped Jane into boxer shorts and a WICKED t-shirt which had been a gift from Maura on a weekend trip to New York the two had made for the Musical. Maura got Jane tucked into the bed. Angela came back in with the water, juice, and the bag with Jane's meds. As Maura examined the bottles Angela sat down next to her daughter.

"Hey baby, how are you?" Angela asked softly. She felt the heat coming off Jane's body and looked at Maura worriedly. Maura shook her head at Angela. Angela looked back at Jane studying her relaxed position in bed. Her daughter didn't seem to be in any pain, but Angela knew looks could be deceiving with Jane. The young woman had learned from an early age to hide her pain so she could measure up to others standards.

"I'm okay just really tired. Maura took me to Enzo's for dinner. It was nice." Jane said her voice gravelly with sleep. "Sorry I am a party killer mom." Angela ran her fingers through Jane's hair attempting to sooth her daughter.

"No, you are not a party killer. You are my lovely daughter who needs her rest. I'm just happy your home and out of the hospital." Angela said as she watched Jane start to fall asleep.

"Jane, I need you to take your medicine." Maura said softly as Angela moved to let her sit next to Jane. Maura helped Jane watching to make sure she took all her medicine. She pulled a thermometer out and took Jane's temperature. It was slightly elevated probably from the walk and dinner. It had been the most activity Jane had been involved with in over a week or so. "Get some rest Jane. I'm going to talk to everyone and then I'll be back." Maura leaned over kissing Jane's cheek. Jane nodded with a little hum.

"I love you baby. You rest and I will get with you in the morning honey. Good Night." Angela kissed Jane on the head and gently ran her fingers through her hair one last time. She watched as her daughter's breathing evened out. She walked with Maura out to the other room where the boys, Frost, and Korsak were waiting.

"How is she?" Frost asked concern reflecting from his movements. Maura sighed as Angela had her sit down and went to the kitchen. Angela returned a few minutes later with a glass of wine for Maura. The others relaxed with their drinks waiting on Maura's response.

"Better. She has a slight fever from all the activity before she came home. She is worn out and her body is still healing, but with a few weeks of rest she should be on her way to recovery. She has a daily set of exercises from physical therapy to return her to strength. Dr. Fontaine will be in the house next to us at Martha's Vineyard so Jane can continue her therapy. As long as she doesn't get sick again and takes it slow all should be well." Frost nodded, but Tommy knew there was something bothering Maura. He could see it. After all those hours spent together watching Jane and talking with the ME he could tell. He would wait to ask.

"Well, it's obvious she is on the road to recovery. When she is ready for the case files on all of this let me know. I know Jane. She will want to know what all happened. I think Frost and I need to go and let you get some rest. You have my number to reach me. Just update us on her recovery while you're gone. We both have four days off. Captain said we earned it." Korsak stood as Frost rose. Barry briefly looked toward Maura's bedroom hesitating longer than normal and then walked out with Korsak. Maura knew something was wrong. She got up and followed them. The two men were just about to the car when Maura called out.

"Barry, can I speak to you a moment?" Maura said. Frost stopped a moment looking at Korsak. Korsak shrugged his shoulders as Barry dropped his head for just a moment. His shoulders seemed to collapse inward some before he turned around walking back to Maura.

"What's up Doc?" Barry asked though he wouldn't meet her eyes. Maura reached out catching his chin and making him look at her.

"What's going on Barry?" Maura asked as her hands dropped away. Barry took a deep breath like he was readying himself for battle.

"Captain asked me if I wanted a different partner today." Barry said softly looking up at the medical examiner. Maura's eyes narrowed as she took a closer look at Barry. The detective was having a hard time meeting her eyes.

"Why would he ask that?" Maura asked the detective. Barry looked away briefly.

"Some of the guys have been razzing me that Jane should have been able to take care of herself, prevent herself from being kidnapped. They keep asking me if I want to be saddled with a partner who can't watch my back." The fury and ire that rose up in the medical examiner could have taken out a perp without a touch. It caused Barry to take a step back in fear.

"What did you say to them Barry?" Maura asked angrily. Maura knew Jane didn't need Barry doubting her. She needed a partner who had her back. It was why she had dropped Korsak as a partner. She thought that having looked weak in front of him it would cause problems. She wanted to make sure they only saw her strong. However, it had caused her to be isolated and alone. There had been no one to whom she could talk to when the nightmares of Hoyt threatened her. Not until months later when Maura had come along.

"I told them they were full of shit! I even got into a fight with Detective Ainsley about what a pussy he was because he gets a tiny cut and he cries. Jane blew a hole in her self with a gun because she was more worried about everyone else and tried to shrug it off like it was nothing." Maura nodded as some of the fire fell away at the mention of Jane shooting herself. "Ainsley tried to start something the other day again, but Crowe told him to shut his mother fu… Well, you know. Ainsley got mad and threw a punch as Crowe. Next thing you know everyone took a side and a fight erupted in the bull pen. Captain broke it up. Luckily, there were only four detectives with Ainsley. They have been disciplined and sent to sensitivity training. Not to mention they are covering for Crowe, Korsak and I for the next few weeks." It alarmed Maura this had caused such problems within the department. But there had been several new editions to the department after last summer's shooting to replace the detectives who had died.

"Thank you Barry for defending her. Thank you for having her back." Maura said as she closed her eyes briefly. "Where is Crowe? Why isn't he here?" Barry looked at the ground for a moment shuffling his feet.

"Umm, well see Crowe took a bad hit to his nose and right eye area. His wife is caring for him at home right now." Barry said smiling a little.

"Ahhh. Do tell him thank you and if I need to pop his nose into place call me right away." Maura said softly marveling at Crowe defending Jane. A few years ago they had been bitter enemies. Maura stepped forward hugging Barry. "Thank you again." Maura whispered. Barry hugged Maura back and then stepped back.

"Night Doc, take care of Jane. I need my partner back." Barry said as he walked toward where Korsak waited in the car. Maura watched him get inside. She stepped inside and leaned against the door. _Oh Jane I don't think you know how much people care._ She took a deep breath and went into the kitchen area. Angela had cleaned up from where the others had been. Tommy was waiting for his mom. Frankie had gone to the guest house after checking on Jane.

"Night sweetie. I'll be over in the morning and make breakfast. I'll leave it in the warmer for you." It was then that Angela noticed the engagement ring on Maura's hand. She grabbed it firmly and pulled it into view. Her eyes questioned Maura.

"Today, on our walk." Maura said answering the silent question from Angela. "I couldn't believe she would trust me again. I don't know how…She is just so special. I don't want to disappoint her again. I know I will somewhere along the line and it scares me." Maura said softly. Tommy came up hugging Maura.

"We all disappoint people we love. It's the fight and love that keep us together. You're a Rizzoli now. Rizzoli's never give up, understand?" Tommy said as his mother smiled back at him in pride. Maura nodded and hugged Angela and Tommy.

"I promise to do my best." Maura said as she yawned.

"Time for us to go. We will talk more before you leave in the morning. Good night daughter." Angela said hugging the ME one more time.

"Night sis. If you need anything I'm in the guest house." Tommy said looking at the ME for a moment letting her know he knew something was bothering her. Maura nodded and locked the door behind them when they left. She then checked the doors and windows turning the lights off as she went through the house. Joe and Bass had settled down under the coffee table next to each other where they loved to sleep. This seem to be the protected spot since Jane had tripped over Bass a few months back falling on Joe and injuring the pup. A quick trip to the vet had found bruised muscles in Joe's back. The vet had prescribed some pain meds and an antibiotic. After that Jane had been more careful entering the living area from the bedroom. Joe had taken to sleeping below the coffee table. Maura entered the bedroom closing the door. She turned to find Jane out of the bed and the French doors to the bedroom open. Her heart lurched thinking something had happened.

"Jane? Jane where are you?" Maura called slightly panicking. She walked toward the doors to find Jane laying on one of the patio chaise lounges staring up at the sky. She approached her slowly making sure not to startle her. "Hey, what are you doing out here?" Jane looked over at her with a slight glazed look not really seeing Maura, yet recognizing someone was there. Maura was worried. In all the time she had been with Jane she had never seen quite a look like this. Maura wasn't sure if she was asleep, awake, or dazed from the medication. She got her answer in the next few minutes.

"Do you ever wonder why they come after me Maura? I mean what is so special about me. Hoyt? He broke his methodology for me. Peter? He had watched for me for so long. Eric? What made him break his pattern for me? I'm cursed Maura. Why would you want to be with someone who is cursed? All I could do is get you killed." Jane looked away shutting her eyes as tears ran down her cheeks. Maura moved next to Jane.

"Jane, baby look at me." Maura said gently. Jane opened her eyes which reflected back a glazed medicated look. "I love you baby. I will always be with you. Right now I need you to come back to bed with me. You're medication is messing with you. Come back with me inside. Do you hear me?" Jane seemed to look through Maura for the longest time until finally recognizing her.

"Maura?" Jane asked as if out of dream. The confused detective looked around her trying to figure out where she was at. "Where are we?"

"Out on the back patio. You got up out of bed. I think you sleep walked out here. Can you get up and follow me inside?" Jane looked around still in confusion, but nodded. Maura tucked Jane into bed again locking the French doors. She then changed quickly and climbed into bed next to Jane.

"Maura, how did I get on the back patio? I don't remember walking out there." Jane asked confusion and sleep clouding her normally strong voice. Maura snuggled into Jane pulling the detective into her side and holding her close.

"I don't know. It may be the medication. I will have it checked before we leave tomorrow. It will be okay Jane. I will take care of you." Maura whispered softly kissing Jane on the top of her head.

"But.." Jane began only to be interrupted by Maura.

"Shhh, rest now. We will figure it out tomorrow. Rest now Jane, sleep." Maura said and began to softly hum to her lover an old Irish lullaby. Jane relaxed letting go the questions and relaxing into Maura's calming warmth. Maura though stayed humming for a long while as she puzzled out this new dilemma with Jane. Dr. Fontaine would need to hear when they arrived. Maura didn't need Jane to begin sleep walking everywhere.


	32. Chapter 32

**Glazed Feelings **

**Part 32**

**Rizzoli and Isles are the property of TNT and Tess Gerritson. I am just borrowing them for some fanfic. It has been a struggle this week to write, but I find it cathartic. We had grief counselors on campus. So if this piece seems off please excuse this humble bard as life and death have played a part with her this week. I again thank you for reading. Please leave a little something so I know you are enjoying your humble bard, Deanlu.**

Jane took a deep breath of sea air. The sun was just setting on the horizon as Jane closed her eyes. The tension and pain she had felt earlier had now dissipated. She had never wanted to worry Maura, but the stress of breakfast with her mother had pushed her over the edge. Jane knew it would only be a matter of time before Angela had cornered them on the vacation. Jane remembered the argument at the table and cringed inside as the memory from the morning flooded back into her vision.

"Good morning Jane! I have strawberry pancakes, bacon, and coffee for you and Maura. Where is Maura?" Angela asked searching behind Jane. Jane smiled moving slowly and taking a seat at the marble counter. Angela set a plate with pancakes and bacon on it in front of her daughter. .Jane had left Maura in bed snuggled into the covers. The long weeks had caught up with her girlfriend so Jane had left her to get some extra sleep.

"I'm letting her sleep in this morning before she has to drive us to Martha's Vineyard." Jane said taking a sip of her coffee and noticing her mother's grimace. "She's been through a lot. I want to make sure I take care of her for a change." Jane noticed the tension in her mother's shoulders. She took a bite of her pancakes savoring their buttery sweet flavor before looking at her mother again. "Ma, what's wrong?" Jane asked sensing the tension which had risen when she mentioned their vacation.

"I just don't understand why you have to go to Martha's Vineyard to recover. I mean it's better to be home close to the hospital if complications should happen. I could help Maura giving her a break and letting her rest. Why do you have to go away?" Jane sighed as her mother banged around in the kitchen. "I'm telling you Jane first you choose the most dangerous job in the world." Jane shook her head as the headache began to rise from her mother's yelling.

"Ma, it is not the most dangerous job in the world. Crab fishing is the most dangerous job in the world. Haven't you watched the Deadliest Catch?" Angela totally ignored Jane as she piled more pancakes on a nearby plate.

"You're kidnapped, shot, stabbed, threatened, pneumonia, and die. It's like a god damn marathon of pain every time I turn around. Do you even consider or care how I feel?" Jane let out an exasperated sigh as her anger built. She pinched the area between her eyes hoping this headache would pass quickly.

"Ma, this doesn't happen all the time. This was a quirk in my daily work. It does not happen that often." Jane yelled back. Angela turned on her releasing the pent up fear and frustration from weeks of worry.

"Hoyt was not a quirk. Peter was not a quirk. Shooting yourself was not a quirk Jane!" Angela yelled. "Broken noses, broken fingers, broken toes, concussions, and bruises. How much can one body take Jane? How much more do you think you can take before you die?" Angela yelled now.

"I don't know ma. I don't know, but I love what I do. I love keeping people safe. I love solving humanities intricate puzzles. I.." Angela cut her daughter off.

"What about Maura? Do you love her? Do you enjoy putting her through each of these sadistic trials Jane? I tried to set you up with a man so you could take the role of a wife and mother, but no. You decide to date a woman and plan to marry her. You never make it easy Jane. Do you really love her or is this another damn torture you have set for me and her?" Jane's mother stopped realizing what she had said to Jane. Her hands flew over her mouth as tears fell from her face. She turned quickly back to the stove worried she had gone too far and said way too much. Jane loved her mother dearly, but sometimes the hot blooded Italian woman went too far. She really didn't want to argue with her anymore and sought an escape. She placed her fork next to her plate and walked out of the kitchen. Jane walked into the backyard to prevent her anger from spilling over onto her mother any more than it had already. Jane's tears fell down her face as her mother words whipped her fragile psyche. It was then she heard him again.

"_See, I told you Jane. You are weak. You are a burden to them. Maura is so exhausted from caring for you. You cause your mother constant worry. Do they know you gave up at the end Jane? Do they know you just wanted to die so no one would worry? You only cause pain Jane."_ Jane could almost feel his clammy strong hands on her arms, his hot breath wafting across her ear, and his body pressed up against her. It was too much for her. Everything overloaded in her head. She felt dizzy and nauseous. She took a wobbly step forward descending into darkness with Eric's evil laugh following her down.

"Jane? Jane!" Maura yelled as Jane collapsed to the ground. She had come outside to check on Jane after giving Angela an earful.

Jane felt arms wrap around her as she let the morning's memory go and came back to the present. The sun was still up bathing the lovers in its soft light. Maura was hugging her close as she layered soft kisses on her neck. Jane's hands came up to cover Maura's hands in the front. "Mmmmm." Jane hummed.

"Hey, you okay?" Maura asked feeling the slight tension in Jane's shoulders and neck. After the scare this morning Maura did not want Jane taxed in any way. Jane had shrugged it off as pain and exhaustion, but Maura knew something more was going on inside the detective. It was almost as if something had a hold on Jane or maybe someone.

"Yeah, sorry to worry you this morning. I just feel like I should be able to do more." Jane said as the lie rolled off her tongue like silk. This time though Maura recognized it for what it was an attempt to assure her all was fine. "Can we take a short walk on the beach?" Jane asked softly as the Atlantic breeze stirred her hair wildly.

"Yes, come on." Maura said as she moved around taking Jane's hand and leading her down the steps to the beach below. Jane walked with Maura hand in hand. Maura leaning against Jane's shoulder as the sun spread its dying rays of orange, red, and purple across the cold sea waves. "Jane?" Jane looked at where Maura's head leaned as they walked.

"Yes?" Jane asked wrapping an arm around her girlfriend drawing her in closer as the breeze cooled them both.

"Could you please tell me what is bothering you? I know this morning it wasn't the pain." Maura said softly waiting on Jane. When Jane didn't say anything for a long while Maura tried again to get her lover to speak up. Maura stopped pulling Jane in front of her. "We promised each other no more secrets, no more lies. Yet you are keeping secrets from me. You lied to me this morning and you are lying now. Tell me Jane." Jane struggled with her inner demons, especially the one who was speaking inside of her. He laughed and criticized Jane making her doubt herself. Maura's gentle hazel eyes never wavered, never released Jane. Those eyes delved deeper touching parts Jane shielded off from everyone including Jane herself.

"I…I…" Jane looked off at the ocean waves letting them calm her. "I hear him. Eric." Jane looked back at Maura seeing not surprise, but confirmation in the good doctors features. Jane broke away from Maura moving a little off to the side, but not far enough away that the warmth and security fled from the detective. "I thought…I thought it was just nervousness not knowing whether he was alive or dead." Maura moved up behind Jane, but did not touch her. "It's not. He's like Hoyt. He's woven into my dreams." Jane stepped forward toward the waves letting the water shock her with its first cold touch. Maura moved forward grabbing her, pulling her back into her arms. "I've got Hoyt in here Maura. I don't think I can handle Eric too. I…I…" Jane broke down crying on Maura's shoulder as the medical examiner held her tight rubbing her back.

"Shhh, Jane. Let it out, just let it out. Dr. Fontaine is here. She will help you. I will help you too. I love you Jane. I won't let Eric have you. Nor will I let Hoyt hold onto you any longer. We are going to work this out. I promise Jane. We are going to be rid of them." Maura raised Jane's head and kissed her. "We are going to extinguish them Jane." Jane nodded, though she didn't believe Maura. She had lived with the specters of her living nightmares for so long she was sure they couldn't be banished.

"I love you Maura. I love you so much. I just don't want to be a burden." Jane said softly as the ocean breeze dried the trail of her tears.

"Don't ever think you are a burden Jane. This is a partnership. It will not always be equal. Sometimes I will need to be there more for you. Sometimes you will need to be there more for me. Sometimes we will share the burdens of our trials no matter what we will work together love. I love you, that's how our relationship works Jane." Jane nodded as she hugged Maura again. The two lovers turned walking back in the near darkness to the beach house. Dr. Fontaine watched from the porch of a nearby cabin nodding at the two lovers struggle. They had a good chance of making it through the next two weeks if they continued to cling to each other.


	33. Chapter 33

**Glazed Feelings**

**Part 33**

**Rizzoli and Isles are the property of TNT and Tess Gerritson. I am just borrowing them to walk you through this life. All is going okay. I am writing and thinking a lot. I am taking my time with this as I am working through this without a good understanding of how it would go. I am talking with some friends about it that are pretty trustworthy on how this might be handled. Any help, just message me. As always your humble bard, Deanlu.**

"I am not mad as a hatter." Jane whispered softly as she thought about the voice she heard when she was awake and asleep now. It was wearing on her deeply, causing her to not sleep well. It was also beginning to interfere with her ability to heal quickly. She felt warm arms wrap around her as a cup of hot mint tea was set before her. Jane looked up at Maura as the young woman laid a soft kiss on the detective's brow. She then moved around and sat down across from Jane at the table taking her hand to squeeze it gently.

"No, you're not. You have suffered a terrible emotional and mental trauma that your mind and body are desperately trying to cope with and place in a framework it can handle. Your mind is forcing you to deal with the trauma you keep trying to ignore. You can't keep ignoring the trauma you experience Jane." Jane took a slow sip of her tea. They had returned to the house after their walk, but Jane had been unable to sleep. The voice woke her violently several times in a cold sweat. Now they were both waiting on Dr. Fontaine. Jane had asked Maura to call for her after waking on the porch to Maura's concerned eyes watching her.

"I know Maur. I know. It's why I had you call her." Jane said sighing softly and letting her head fall to the table and rest on her arm. "He keeps…He won't…" Jane shook her head. The doorbell rang and Maura rose to answer it. She stopped briefly next to Jane and watched as the detective slipped into a slight doze. Maura continued on to the door. She was worried. Physical injuries were easy to heal with time, medication, and rest. The mind though was more difficult. Jane's mind would be even more so with all the trauma she had suffered and then locked away. Maura looked through the security viewer and opened the door.

"Thank you for coming Dr. Fontaine. It's Jane." Maura said as the good doctor hung her coat and carried her bag in as Maura led her back to the dining room. Dr. Fontaine stopped Maura before they returned to Jane.

"What's wrong?" Dr. Fontaine asked softly looking toward the dining room where she could clearly see Jane and tell she had fallen asleep.

"She says she can hear and see Eric in her dreams. I think it's more. I think she can hear him and see him when she is awake. She seems to lose the moment sometimes and fades out. I told you earlier when I called about the altercation with Jane and her mother. Well, she had left out onto the back patio to leave the argument. I walked out and she was staring into nothing. But a small word escaped Jane's lips. She said weak." Maura looked toward where Jane was asleep. "Hoyt haunts her dreams enough Adelaide. I don't need Eric taking another part of her soul." Maura said with a determined vehemence as she stared at the woman she loved. Doctor Adelaide Fontaine gripped Maura's forearm causing the young woman to look at the doctor.

"Jane has hidden things for a long time Maura. This will not be easy for her. Are you sure you are ready for what may come out of this? Jane and you were estranged for a while. Some of that may come out in ways that you are not ready to hear." Dr. Fontaine said watching as Jane began to move as if in a dream. Maura turned back when she heard Jane call out.

"No, no I won't let you." Jane moved thrashing about some.

"I would endure anything if it would give Jane some peace." Maura said momentarily turning back to Dr. Fontaine. She then moved as Jane's movements knocked the tea over causing the cup to hit the ground. Jane woke screaming.

"!" Jane was up reaching for where her gun would have been her other hand reaching toward something. Maura stopped just short of Jane as Dr. Fontaine pulled her back. "Oh God no, Maura, No…" Jane's scream settled into a sob as she began to drop to the floor on her knees. Dr. Fontaine nodded to Maura who ran catching Jane. Dr. Fontaine moved into the kitchen mixing a white powdery packet with some water. She came back to where Maura held Jane. Jane was awake now.

"Here, drink this it will help." Dr. Fontaine said as Maura whispered softly to Jane. Maura helped Jane drink down what Dr. Fontaine gave her. Jane finished the medicated water and leaned back against Maura. Maura could feel Jane's body unwinding slowly. Dr. Fontaine knelt next to Jane and took her pulse. She nodded toward Maura and the two ladies helped Jane up. They then moved her to the bedroom tucking into bed. Maura gently brushed the hair out of Jane's face. The detective's eyes fluttered open. She looked at the doctor behind Maura.

"What did you give me?" Jane asked though she was too relaxed for her anger to rise. Doctor Fontaine stepped closer.

"I gave you something to calm you down, remove the anxiety, and help you sleep without your little friend disturbing you. When you wake later this afternoon we will talk." Dr. Fontaine said while Jane's eyes fluttered shut.

"Unfair doctor I told you I would talk with you. I never said anything about drugging me. I take it Maura knew you might take this route." Jane stated softly as she fought against the medication that worked slowly to get her tense body to unwind.

"She may have known treatment could include this, but she did not know I would give it to you now." Dr. Fontaine came to sit on the other side of the bed. "Jane, tell me what he says to you." Dr. Fontaine asked firmly, but gently. Maura looked at the doctor angrily for a moment. Adelaide shook her head cautioning Maura to say nothing. Jane's eyes flutter open and look at the older doctor for a moment.

"He says I'm weak. I can't protect the ones I love." Jane's eyes flutter shut and she stretched letting Maura's hand go. "He tells me I'm a burden to them. Ma pointed that out to me too this morning." Adelaide looked at Maura sharply. Maura nodded still staying quiet. "Ma is not happy with me. Hoyt keeps telling me I'm his, but Eric wants me now." Jane yawned as the medication took a stronger hold. She seemed to drift off for a moment. Dr. Fontaine was about to ask Jane something when the detective made one last cryptic statement. "I can still feel the knife sliding over me. The only time I don't feel dirty is when Maura is with me, but I am not sure she wants me. " Maura bowed her head softly.

"Why don't you think she wants you Jane?" Dr. Fontaine asked relieved the drug was crumbling defenses the detective had erected. She knew this was almost too easy. Jane must have wanted to solve her problems very badly or else the detective was getting closer to actually losing it. Jane seemed to rouse herself and looked the older doctor in the eye to answer the question.

"Because I protect her all the time and I protected her in that warehouse. She just turned on me. Me, who was always by her side, always there, she turned on me and went to someone who lurks in the shadows. Why would she do that?" Jane leaned back relaxing into the pillows finally succumbing to sleep. Dr. Fontaine looked over at Maura who had covered her face in shame and pain.

"Come on, we need to talk now." Dr. Fontaine said softly. "Jane will sleep for several hours and needs the rest. Eric and Hoyt will not be making an appearance with the medication." Maura nodded, sniffling, and rising off the bed. They headed into the kitchen where the suns first rays were flooding through the window.

"I'll make some coffee and then we will talk." Maura said as she worked on the coffee. Dr. Fontaine sat at the nearby breakfast bar waiting on the story.


	34. Chapter 34

**Glazed Feelings**

**Part 34**

**Rizzoli and Isles are the property of TNT and Tess Gerritson. I am just borrowing them for a little angst. Thank you for the encouragement. Thank you for the 300 reviews. I am speechless. For a story that was only going to be a few chapters it has taken on a life of its own and gone to places I never expected to go. It has also laid bare some foibles in the author's life. Thank you for your continued reading your humble bard, Deanlu.**

"So until Jane called me that night when she was sick we had only gone through the motions of acquaintances and respected colleagues. It wasn't until her call that we got back together." Dr. Fontaine sat staring at her third cup of coffee as Maura ended her story about the warehouse. The doctor rose and walked over to the French doors that led to the porch. She stared out toward the ocean. Sunlight glinted off the dark blue surface disguising the dangers that lived there. So much made sense now. Why Eric was alive within Jane? Why Hoyt started too lurked so deeply? Dr. Fontaine turned back to Maura measuring the women before her. Would she be able to complete the therapy? She had already turned her back on Jane and ran away once.

"How long since you have been intimate with Jane?" Dr. Fontaine's question was blunt and to the point. Maura looked up a little surprised.

"We've cuddled, talked about that day, and subsequent things we need to work out." Maura said getting a sigh from the doctor.

"No, how long since you have made love not sex, made love and let Jane see the inner you?" Dr. Fontaine mentally pushed the good doctor sitting before her. Maura pushed up from the table angrily now and moved toward the French doors to the porch.

"I don't think that matters here. We are talking about Jane's psyche, not our love life." Maura pushed through the doors and went out to lean on the porch rail. The air was still cool in the early morning sunlight and it brought the fresh scent of the ocean washing away some of the frustration she suddenly felt.

"It does matter Maura if it makes you run away now. It does matter if it makes Jane doubt your love inside enough to choose to live with her demons and suffer mentally." Dr. Fontaine chided the medical examiner.

"You don't mean that?" Maura remonstrated whirling around at the doctor.

"Yes, I do! You have already told me you rejected Jane in place of your birth father at the warehouse. You have told me you further deepened the rejection by handing back her ring in the bull pen of BPD in front of her colleagues to make the shame and pain abysmal. You rejected her for the following months by turning down invitations of friendship, ignoring her calls, and basically isolating her." The doctor now stepped closer looking Maura in the eye. "You forced family, friends, and colleagues to choose sides while Jane suffered the egregious wound to her heart and still offered you friendship. Tell me she gave you a gruff word in all that time Dr. Isles? Did she?" Fontaine asked forcefully as tears fell from Maura's eyes.

"No, she didn't." Maura turned away causing the good doctor to strain to hear her. "She was the epitome of a best friend no matter how deeply I drove the knife in to separate and tear apart our friendship and love." Maura staggered over to the railings as her head fell to her chest.

"So I ask again, how long since you were intimate with your lover? How long since you bore your soul to her Maura?" Dr. Fontaine asked softly as she came to stand behind the medical examiner.

"About two and a half months. We were having some problems before the shooting. Nothing major, just Jane and my work schedule kept us apart a little more than usual. I was becoming a little frustrated with it." Maura returned indignantly. "But I don't understand why that's important? Eric is in her dreams. Eric is causing her sleepless nights. What does that have to do with Jane and I being intimate?"

"Because it is not Eric who is doing the torturing of Jane. It's you!" Doctor Fontaine said firmly. Maura looked flabbergasted.

"You're joking. You're joking. She sees Eric, not me. She said she forgave me. How? How could it be me?" Maura sat heavily in a nearby chair. She was totally flummoxed. Dr. Fontaine pulled a chair over and sat down.

"Eric could only hurt her body. Hoyt could only hurt her mind and body. But you, you could hurt her mind, body, and soul. She opened her heart to you. Risked everything because she believed in you, trusted you, and loved you. Then you rejected her completely without shame. At some point her mind will let her realize it is you. " Dr. Fontaine said gently trying to get the ME to see.

"But the knife, his hands, what about them?" Maura asked looking at the doctor.

"Did you not just say you pushed the knife deep? Does not love scorned inspire fear, panic? Jane herself said she couldn't live without your touch now. How has your touch changed? Are you holding a knife? Or are your hands succoring your lover now? The psyche is a strange place Maura. The mind will use rationality to heal itself. But do not doubt me. It is you, not Eric that is worrying Jane deeply." Fontaine said leaning back in the chair watching Maura digest all that was said.

"She asked me to marry her again. I said yes." Maura said looking at the doctor once more.

"Then you past both the first, second, and third test from Jane." Adelaide said smiling for once. Maura looked puzzle.

"What do you mean first, second, and third test?" Maura asked inquisitively as her mind whirled trying to figure everything out.

"So you honestly think it was by accident Jane called you when she became sick? Do you think her telling you she forgave you was false? Do you think that giving the ring back to you at the moment she did was not planned? Inside, deep inside they were all tests Maura. She fully expects you to run again. She fully expects you to betray her again, because you have." Fontaine said glancing toward the French doors surreptitiously. Maura was looking out on the ocean now thinking.

"Then how do I prove to her that I love her? That I want to be with her? That I won't run again?" The medical examiner asked softly. Dr. Fontaine leaned forward reaching out and turning Maura's head toward the French doors with a gentle touch.

"You bare your soul!" Fontaine said as Maura saw Jane standing there not moving just watching the two women.


	35. Chapter 35

**Glazed Feelings **

**Part 35**

**Rizzoli and Isles are the property of TNT and Tess Gerritson. I am just borrowing them for a little angst. Ummm, hold on to your hats. This section has an M rating! Please know there will be the beginning of amorous loving in this part. Your humble bard, Deanlu**

"What is going on out here?" Jane looked drawn and tired still, but she seemed to be more alert. She was looking at the two women like they had grown horns. Jane could tell Maura had been crying and was still upset. She had woken from a coughing fit. One she was loath to tell Maura about. She noticed it was light out and had a vague remembrance of Maura and Dr. Fontaine putting her to bed. She just couldn't remember why at the moment as her thoughts were muddled. Jane carried her coffee to the table setting it down and then turning to Maura. She ran her hands along Maura's cheeks and bent down kissing her softly on the lips. Maura for her part had heard Dr. Fontaine loud and clear. She responded by deepening the kiss and pulling Jane to her. The doctor walked down to the beach heading toward her cabin. Long minutes later Jane broke the kiss resting her head against Maura's.

"Okay, I'm a little confused right now. Did something happen?" Jane asked raising her head and looking deeply into Maura's eyes. She saw so much racing behind those intelligent orbs. Confusion, pain, anger, hurt, shame, and love were rolling through Maura. It was like the Irish woman was on overload. A few tears fell as Maura nodded. "Hey, if I've done something wrong I'm sorry Maura. I really am." Maura just cried harder at Jane's words finally seeing how fearful Jane was from their separation. Maura pulled Jane back kissing her again and resting their foreheads together.

"No, no. It wasn't something you did. It was something I did, without really considering what consequences my actions would have. Oh Jane, I have been so stupid." Maura cried clinging to Jane who was too bewildered by this turn of events to do anything more than hold Maura.

"Hey, come on. How about we walk on the beach? It will give you time to calm down and talk to me. Okay?" Jane rose not waiting for Maura's answer. She pulled her girlfriend into her side and guided her down the steps to the sandy beach. They walked along snuggled together with Jane laying soft kisses on Maura's cheek and ear. Jane found a nice spot and pulled Maura down in the sand next to her to sit. "Now tell me what is going on?"

"I hadn't… Oh God why is this so hard?" Maura said wringing her hands and looking toward the ocean. Jane reached around Maura's face taking hold of her cheek and turning her girlfriend's face toward her.

"Listen to me, there is nothing you could say that would turn me away from you. Maura, we knew when we agreed to Dr. Fontaine we would have to look at ourselves deep inside. I want to be whole for you. You told me you want to be whole for me. It's time to stop running away from our fears and conquer them. Don't you think?" Maura looked into Jane's dusky, darkened eyes and found hope staring back at her.

"Yes, you're right." Maura closed her eyes for a moment and centered herself. "Please understand this is very hard for me Jane. I feel ashamed, afraid you will leave me, and not sure how to make things right." Jane nodded as Maura waited for her acknowledgement. "I never realized how deeply I hurt you Jane. How truly malicious and vile I had been to you? I embarrassed you in front of your friends, family, and colleagues to make sure you felt shame and hurt as deeply as I hurt." Jane kept an arm around Maura while taking her hands into her free one. She had waited for so long to hear an explanation from Maura that she was shocked it was coming now. "I tossed everything I knew about your loyalty, faithfulness, and love aside for a man I barely knew because I was desperate to have information on my mother. Even more though, to feel like I was wanted and needed from birth, that I was not…." Maura looked out at the ocean now watching the tide roll in and out. She struggled to explain to Jane everything she had tried to keep hidden inside. "...an accident, a freak of nature that was unwanted and unneeded by anyone." Silent tears ran down Maura's face. "I messed up everything in my desperation to have what I wanted, because I have always felt I didn't measure up…Maura, bora…the girl who is only good for a fling, but not good enough to marry…to stay with…for anyone to want to stay with. Oh God Jane, I have always felt you would leave me…that I wasn't capable of having a long term friend, let alone lover…" Maura looked at Jane. "…or a wife. I am so sorry Jane. I am so sorry I betrayed your trust, your belief in me, and your love." Maura looked away not wanting to see the rejection in her lover and fiancée's eyes. Jane was silent for a long time watching the wave's move in and out washing away a layer of sand each time. She wished she could wash away the pain and hurt her and Maura had suffered, but she couldn't. She could only accept that it happened and choose her path now. She had to decide if she wanted to live her life with or without Maura.

"Do you truly love me Maura Isles?" Jane asked softly watching Maura as she turned to face her. Maura nodded watching those intelligent eyes assess her.

"More than anything Jane. I want us to be whole again. I want you to have back what I stole from you." Maura said in a breathless whisper of wonder. Jane looked out at the waves again. Did she really want to risk this type of pain and devastation again? Yes, she had asked Maura to marry her yesterday, but what Maura was saying now would mean she would have to risk her heart she had securely shielded from Maura. It hadn't meant that she wouldn't marry her and love her. She would just have never given all of her just in case this hurt happened again. Jane made up her mind. She rose off the sand and pull Maura up. For her part Maura was extremely confused. Jane looked Maura in the eye seeing the fear hidden just behind a glimmer of hope. Jane leaned forward kissing Maura slowly at first and then deepening it. Her hands drifted under Maura's shirt caressing up her side. "Jane, Jane we need to go back to the house." Maura was quickly losing her sense of reason as Jane branded her with kisses across her face, down her jaw to her neck. Jane stopped momentarily getting a wicked grin across her face. "Jane? Jane what are you thinking…" Maura started backing up slowly. She had seen that face before, before Jane and she had separated. While she was thrilled to see it she knew what it meant.

"I think Maura we need to cool off for now." Maura glanced back at the waves and started shaking her head.

"Oh no, no, no, no, no…" Maura took off running down the beach toward the house. Jane was in hot pursuit though she needed to bring Maura down quickly because she felt several things starting to protest in her healing body at her sudden activity. Jane stopped suddenly, grabbing at her side where the surgery to her lung had been done. Maura had slowed and was turning as Jane collapsed to the sand the tide rushing in to engulf her body. Maura froze in mid step changing her direction toward Jane. "Jane! Jane!" She ran hard pounding into the sand as another wave of water engulfed Jane nearly rolling her over. Maura grabbed for Jane to anchor her before the tide could wash her out. "Jane speak to me, pleaseee…" Maura's please turned into a squeal as Jane surged up from the water on the beach promptly dumping the medical examiner in the water. Jane had her pinned to the sand as the water rushed in around them. Maura looked up into Jane's eyes seeing a wild, tempest storming in her eyes. She knew Jane was about to claim her again completely and wholly hers. The storm broke as Jane leaned down kissing Maura hard and rough. Her lips and hands demanding Maura's surrender. Maura capitulated completely letting Jane stoke this passionate exchange.

"Maura…mine…" Jane's hands roamed all over Maura playing her like a violin each stroke and touch igniting a fire within the medical examiner. Maura opened herself to Jane allowing the cold, hollowness she had felt inside to be burned away by the raging inferno of Jane's love.

"Yes…yours…Jane…please…" Maura's moans and screams echoed across the beach. There was no one to hear as it was too early in the season for tourists and too private for others to come to unless they lived in one of the homes. Most of these remained empty during the week. Maura held nothing back taking and giving to Jane. The feeling of fire from Jane's touch and ice from the water threw Maura's mind into a spin as Jane's assault on her body intensified. The spring skirt Maura had been wearing now road up high as Jane claimed Maura in the Atlantic surf. Deep, strong strokes meant to build Maura's passion and fervor into a blazing conflagration. Maura came exploding from Jane's feral assault in intensity even as Jane came from the passion they both shared. The detective collapsed on top of Maura surrounding her with her essence. Both ladies were gasping for air astonished at the strength of their ardor and the bravery of Jane's public exhibition.

"Jane?" Maura said breathing heavily. Jane pushed herself up with what little strength she had left.

"Yes?" Jane asked trembling from the energy it was taking to keep herself elevated above Maura.

"Take me home and love me again." Maura said looking at Jane with open eyes. Jane looked into Maura finally seeing what had so long been shuttered to her. Jane smiled softly lowering herself back down on Maura and kissing her.

"As you wish." Jane said softly.


	36. Chapter 36

**Glazed Feelings **

**Part 36**

**Rizzoli and Isles are the property of TNT and Tess Gerritson. I am only borrowing them for some shameless love. Thank you all for you encouragement. I appreciate your continued reading and reviewing. I start teaching summer school this week. Strangely enough I am teaching math. It should be interesting. As always please enjoy, your humble bard, Deanlu.**

Jane woke alone to moonlit darkness. The bed sheet that dripped off her body would have reminded anyone of a painting by Dega. She could see low flickering light down the hallway as soft Spanish guitar music filtered into her hearing. She could see the shadows of movement reflecting off the walls.

"What is she up too?" Jane wondered. After their lovemaking on the beach, Maura had helped Jane back to the house. There they had showered to warm their bodies from the cold surf. Their lovemaking that followed had been slower, patient, and complete causing the detective and doctor to drop off into sleep afterwards wrapped in each other's arms. Now hour's later Jane rose looking for her fiancée. She wrapped the bed sheet around her body like a toga and wandered slowly down the hallway to the living room. She was totally surprised by what Maura had done.

"Hello love," Maura's deep, husky voice called out to Jane. Jane smiled as a shiver ran down her back and a warm coil of love wrapped around her heart. Maura had placed a quilt with multiple pillows on the floor in front of the fire place where a small fire blazed to ward off the chill of the night. She had set out a tray of cheeses, sliced bits of chicken, sliced baguettes, and honey. Chilling in a small cooler were bottles of water and juice. The one thing Jane was not happy to see was the small tray of medication set out for her to take. Jane grimaced a little, but could not ignore the white silk robe wrapped doctor beckoning her to come hither. Jane walked over to Maura as if being reeled in on a string. Maura took her hand helping her recline on the pillows next to her. She handed a few slices of cheese to Jane. "We haven't eaten in a while and I need you to keep your strength up detective." Jane smiled taking a bite of the cheese even as the whisper of doubt spread through her mind.

"I can see you doubt Jane. I promise I will try and prove to you my loyalty and faithfulness every day." Maura said as Jane enjoyed the repast set before her. While Maura's confession had done a great deal to banish most of the doubt in Jane's mind the detective still felt insecure about how easily she had been taken down by Eric. She was struggling on whether she could be the protector and strong partner Maura needed. "What? Tell me Jane." Maura's soft, clear voice whispered as they lay enjoying the meal.

"Maura, are you sure I am the strong partner you want? I mean I am not sure I can even protect you? I seem to have failed on that miserably. If anything the warehouse, the kidnapping from BPD, hell, even the time Patty broke into your house proved that." Jane said as gentle fingers covered her lips. Maura saw how deep the doubt went in her lovers eyes. This was not going to be easy for Jane to overcome.

"Yes, you are everything I need. You are a strong partner. You are having a rough time right now, but you will be strong in body again soon. Please honey, do not doubt yourself. You make me so happy. You heal the holes in my soul and the rips in my heart. Let me help you heal Jane." Maura's voice caused Jane to shiver as it took a lower octave. Jane sighed closing her eyes and banished the doubt for now. It was no use in fighting this love between Maura and her. It was too strong. It had literally possessed both women completely in every way. She needed to stop having doubts. She needed to start letting Maura's love and Dr. Fontaine's advice begin to heal her. Jane opened her eyes to Maura's worried look.

"Sorry, please bear with me. This may take some time." Jane said as the doctor held her hand running her thumb back and forth across it. "I promise that I will work hard to get myself back to where I was Maur." Jane ran her fingers along Maura's jaw accidently leaving some honey from her fingers. Maura went to wipe it off until Jane grabbed her hand. Maura look into her lovers eyes to see dark pools of liquid desire reflect back at her. Jane rose on her knees letting the bed sheet fall away. Maura gasped taking in her lover. No matter how many times she looked at Jane she would never stop desiring this woman. Jane's body was that of a hero's in Maura's mind. The scars that decorated it only added to the doctor's attraction and desire for Jane as it reminded her of how selfless and courageous this woman was for others…for her. Jane bent low nipping, kissing, and suckling along Maura's jaw until she had every drop of honey. Jane moved back to recline on the pillows again with a self-satisfied smirk on her face. "Sorry, didn't mean to cause you to get sticky." Maura let go of the breath she was unaware she had been holding. Jane watched as the flustered woman tried to pull herself together.

"I can tell being in love with you is going to be a very pleasurable experience." Maura said as she fed Jane a piece of the baguette with honey on it. Jane took the piece of honey covered bread allowing her tongue to skim over Maura's fingers removing the honey and causing shivers to appear on the women's skin. Jane and Maura continued to enjoy their meal exchanging affection and tenderness as their ardor grew again. The two women made love until dawn's faint purples and pinks stained the sky. Maura woke to the late morning sun coming through the windows. She was wrapped in Jane's arms being held tightly even as Jane's breath came in fast, shallow staccatos as the detective suffered through another nightmare.

"Shhh, Jane, he can't hurt you. Shhh, I am here Jane." Maura whispered gathering in closer to Jane pressing soft kisses to her breast where Jane's heart beat erratically. A fine sheen of sweat that had nothing to do with their earlier lovemaking had broken out on Jane. "Shhh, I'm here Jane. You are protecting me. I am here Jane. I love you." Maura's voice continued its attempt to sooth and assures the dreamer until consciousness returned. The doctor noticed tears now leaked from Jane's eyes even as her movements and hold lessened. Maura planted soft kisses on Jane's breast and shoulder area whispering softly. Jane woke to Maura's steady embrace and soft kisses.

"Maura?" Jane's raspy, confused voiced called out.

"I'm here Jane. Don't worry. I love you." Maura said reassuringly. Jane began coughing. A small cough, but a cough none the less that worried the medical examiner. She gently braced her hand on Jane's chest hoping this wasn't the return of the bronchitis.

"It's okay. Doctor Reynolds told me I may have the cough off and on the rest of the week. He said it was just my system recovering. No need to worry Maur unless it becomes persistent again." Jane said as she sat up releasing Maura and grabbed the nearby water bottle. A few swallows later and Jane was breathing better. She leaned forward placing her elbows on her knees and rested her head in her hands. The dream was bad. It had her nervous and a little off kilter. Maura slid in behind her resting her head against Jane's shoulder and molding the rest of her body to the detective. She listened to Jane's breathing satisfying herself that the young woman was okay.

"Will you tell me about your dream or is it too fresh?" Maura asked knowing the dreams sometimes needed time so Jane could distance herself from the images that terrified her. Jane raised her head and looked at the embers of the fire.

"It's stupid. I should know it's not real. It always starts the same." Jane stopped shivering, but not from the cool breeze. Maura reached over grabbing the nearby blanket and wrapping it around them.

"Go ahead. It's only a dream. It can't hurt you. I'm here Jane." Maura said kissing her lovers shoulder reassuringly. Jane leaned back into Maura absorbing her loves support and taking comfort in her touch.

"I…Can we go into town today Maur? I need to get out for a short while." Maura could tell Jane was avoiding, but she allowed it. Maura squeezed Jane hugging her tightly.

"Sure. How about we shower and then have breakfast in town. I know this little place that serves great eggs. Dr. Fontaine will want to see you later today. No more avoiding her Jane." Maura said as she went to get up. Jane grabbed her hand pulling her down for a kiss.

"Thank you for not pushing." Jane said softly rubbing noses with Maur and kissing her cheek. Maura kissed her back and looked Jane in the eyes.

"You're not off the hook detective. You will talk to me Jane. I love you and I will fight for us." Maura said softly kissing the detective one more time. Jane watched as Maura stood and reached out a hand for her. Jane realized at that moment Maura was so much braver than she was inside.


	37. Chapter 37

**Glazed Feelings**

**Part 37**

**Rizzoli and Isles are the property of TNT and Tess Gerritson. I am just borrowing them for a little fun. I totally enjoyed the premier. It was obvious that the producers wanted to get the relationship on to a better footing, but also to leave a great deal of healing to take place this season. Umm, this is a nice little interlude before Jane confronts her demons. The poem is The Gardner by Rabindranath Tagore.**

Fudge, it was a downfall of Jane's ever since she had first tasted her mother's in kindergarten. It hadn't been a major issue though until her mother and father had taken her to Coney Island. That year she had found out that fudge came in different flavors, flavors she had a weakness for to this day as she stood looking into the glass case at Murdick's Fudge. Maura had popped into a small boutique next door. While Jane waited she noticed that there was a fudge shop nearby, so she texted Maura where to find her. So far she had sampled five of the different varieties. The girl behind the counter was now waiting on her.

"Okay, I'll take 8 ounces of the Rocky Road Fudge, the Cape Cod Cranberry Fudge, and …" Jane was interrupted in mid-sentence.

"The chocolate peanut butter fudge for Roly Poly Rizzoli." Jane turned hearing the deep booming voice ready to lash out at the person who had used the childhood name the children had called her on the playground. When turned she found herself face to face with Aine McCalister, one of her friends from high school. He smiled broadly at her as her surprised face burst into smile.

"Aine? Aine! What are you doing here?" Jane asked as she was swept into a hug. She returned it with as much enthusiasm. "I haven't seen you since we graduated high school." It was then she noticed he wore the uniform of a police officer from Vineyard Haven.

"I went through academy behind you a few years and then took a job here in Vineyard Haven." Jane started to feel pain in her rib cage and chest from where Aine was holding her tightly. She began to release Aine even as he tightened his hold.

"Aine, can you let go please." Aine released Jane noticing she staggered just a little. He put out a hand to help her maintain her balance. Jane hated showing any weakness, but her still healing lung and rib area were not yet ready for the normal day to day of her life.

"Hey, you okay? Easy?" Aine's concern over Jane's ill health warmed the detective. He had always been the kid in school who gave everyone the benefit of the doubt. He would be there when the bullies picked on her and run interference sometimes too. At least until they went after him.

"No, I'm okay just give me a minute. You have a strong grip." Jane said as she bent over trying to catch her breath. She hoped Maura didn't walk in at that moment. Unfortunately, for Jane Maura did walk in at that moment. She knew the doctor would have some words for her later.

"Jane? Jane are you alright?" Maura moved quickly to where Jane was bent over with the nearby officer of the law. She set her purchases down and placed her hands under Jane's shirt checking the rib area. "Slow breathes Jane, in and out." Maura's worried face made Jane smile. She loved having someone who was there for her for a change. She grabbed Maura's hands and squeezed them gently.

"Yeah, Aine here just squeezed me a little too hard in his hug. It's better now." Jane said standing and leaning against Maura. But Maura knew something was still wrong as she was holding a good deal more weight of Jane's than she should. Jane kissed Maura's head to reassure her. Aine's eyes grew bigger and then brightened with Jane's next words.

"Aine, this is Doctor Maura Isles, my fiancée." Jane said standing as independently as she could at the moment. Aine smiled and reached out his hand. He gave Maura a measured look as he took in her appearance and concern for his high school friend.

"Any friend of Jane's or fiancée is a friend of mine. I never thought she would marry. She's a little too independent and stubborn for her own good." Aine said winking at Maura. Maura immediately liked the gentlemen. He exuded a good natured warmth and charisma that were lacking in many people.

"It's a pleasure to meet you Aine ?" Maura asked cocking her head in question as she shook his hand back.

"McCalister, Aine McCalister mam. Jane and I use to attend school together until we graduated. Then we went our separate ways. I hadn't seen or heard from her until just now. Amazing how time makes so many changes." He said smiling. Maura nodded completely understanding.

"Miss, did you also want the chocolate peanut butter fudge?" The girl behind the counter asked inquisitively. Jane nodded as she blushed and went to pay for her purchase.

"I'll be right back. Aine, keep an eye on my fiancée for a minute. She has a way of getting into trouble." Jane said as she turned toward the counter.

"Says the detective who became the hero of Boston," Maura called after her. She turned back to Aine. "So, you must have it rough here in summer?" Maura said smiling at the large man.

"Well, overall it's mostly the normal tourist problems in summer. Every once in a while we get the abnormal around here. Right now it's still quiet since its early spring. So you're a doctor of what?" Aine asked as he watched Jane make her purchases at the register.

"I am the head Medical Examiner for Boston Police Department for the Commonwealth of Massachusetts. Jane is the first woman detective in homicide for Boston Police Department." Maura said with pride looking over at Jane as she approached.

"Yes, I kind of have kept up on your career through the papers. I still get the Boston one delivered to me here. Sorry, I should have remembered you would be recouping from your latest adventure." Aine said apologetically. Jane shook her head as they stepped out of the fudge shop and onto the walk.

"Nah, it's okay. Hey, why not come over and have dinner with us this weekend. Frankie says he is coming up with ma." Jane said as Aine's eyes lit up at that.

"I believe I could handle that." Aine said as his radio went off. Aine acknowledge the dispatcher. "I have to go, but I will take you up on that. Here's my card." Aine said as he wrote his home number on the back and handed it to Maura. "I know how Jane loses things." Aine said as he winked as Maura.

"Hey, that's my girl you're winking at Aine." Jane said wrapping her arms around Maura.

"You have nothing to fear from me Rizzoli. See you both later." Officer McCalister said waving at them. They watched as he got into his car and pulled away. Maura turned to Jane now that her friend was gone and eyed her seriously.

"I waited; now tell me what is wrong?" Maura asked as she looked at Jane. Jane sighed, and looked at Maura. She knew better than to hide anything at this point.

"I felt a pop when Aine hugged me. I'm thinking it was a vertebra in my back, but now I am having twinges of pain in my rib area. I really don't think it's anything serious. So what did you pick up?" Jane asked as they strolled along in the afternoon sunlight checking little shops along the way.

"Stop changing the topic Jane. You're hurting. We need to take you back to the beach house so I can examine you. This could be serious." Maura said angrily worried Jane may have broken something. Jane stopped them on the walk and pulled Maura onto a nearby bench.

"Hey, hold on now. I am fine Maura. It's just a little pain. It's nothing major. I promise if it gets worse or it's accompanied by any other symptoms I will tell you." Jane said looking into Maura's eyes. Maura grabbed Jane holding on to her for dear life. Her world was a little off kilter. Jane provided the steadfastness she needed. She really worried she would still lose the detective. After a little bit just breathing in Jane's scent and listening to the beat of her heart Maura pulled her head up to look at the detective.

"Sorry, I'm still a little off kilter from all that's happened. I know how you are a lot of the time. You cover up your pain and hurt so others won't know." Maura said watching the acknowledgement in Jane's eyes. "It can't be that way Jane between us." Jane started to protest and Maura covered her lips. "Hear me out, please." Jane nodded as Maura continued. "I love you with all I am. I know there are times you have to be strong, to push through the pain, and keep going. I understand that Jane. Now, however, you do not. Now we are alone, together. You have to trust me Jane that I will care for you. You can't always be the strong one love." Maura said softly as Jane's eyes closed. "You have to rest sometimes too even from that."

"I just feel like I have been taking too much lately. I want to care for you Maur. It's hard to release those reigns and let you care for me. You just mean so much to me." Jane said softly kissing Maur on the forehead. Jane leaned back and looked into Maura's eyes. "All right, how about we get some lunch before we go back maybe the Blue Canoe down by the water on the beach road." Maura nodded, but grabbed Jane's hand as she rose pulling her back down for a minute. She kissed her lover deeply and slowly putting all the love she felt for Jane into the kiss. After a few minutes they broke apart resting their foreheads together.

"I love you Jane. I just want to be sure you understand how much you affect me and how much I hurt when you hurt." Maura said looking at the women in front of her. Jane smiled pulling Maura into a hug. She wrapped her arms around the beautiful women just enjoying the peace and warmth that emanated from her.

"I do, but you keep on reminding me, like Aine said, "I'm stubborn and independent too much." Our relationship is the most important thing in my life besides my career Maura. It's going to take some time to figure out how to balance the two." Jane pulled back and looked the medical examiner in the eye. "Please be patient with me. Don't give up on me, okay?" Jane asked softly. A fire entered Maura's eyes as she looked into Jane's soul.

"Never!" Maura said as she kissed Jane fiercely. Jane broke the kiss chuckling a little and rubbing her nose against her loves.

"One more of those and we may never get to the restaurant. Come on." Jane said even as a mischievous glint entered Maura's eyes. Jane waved down an island taxi which whisked them along the beach road to the Blue Canoe. She had checked the menu on her phone while Maura had shopped and was sure the doctor would enjoy the menu. Upon arrival they were seated outside near the ocean to watch the sunset. While Maura ordered a nice wine and Jane opted for water with lemon the two indulged in Oysters Bienville, fried calamari, and mussels in a beautiful Thai curry for an appetizer.

"This was a beautiful idea Jane." Maura said as Jane took a sip of her water. The cool evening breeze was just right. Maura watched the setting sun on the ocean as the waiter set down their cups of clam chowder. He moved off quickly even while Maura continued to watch and listen to soothing sounds of the ocean. She was startled somewhat by the eloquence and ephemeral quality Jane's voice took on as she suddenly spoke.

"Clouds come floating into my life, no longer to carry rain or usher storm, but to add color to my sunset sky." Jane said softly as she gazed upon Maura's face with the setting sun in the background. "I believe Rabindranath Tagore has captured the essence of the moment." Jane blushed as she seemed to come back to herself and realize she had spoken aloud. "Sorry, umm, I was just…"

"…Waxing poetically. I love when you do Jane. Most people never get to see this side of you." Maura said reaching across the table and grabbing Jane's hand. "Please don't hide your intelligence. It's beautiful, romantic, and very sexy to me." Jane blushed even more after Maura's compliment. They ate their chowder just enjoying the moment of warmth and love. Soon the waiter returned with their entrée's. Maura had ordered the 'Grassy Grouper' pan seared with shrimp on a bed of steamed spinach, asparagus with key lime butter sauce. Jane had ordered the Seafood Risotto consisting of shrimp, scallops, calamari, mussels, and sweet peas. 

"Jane, can I ask you a question?" Maura looked over her wine glass as her detective nodded while setting her fork down. "What other pieces of Rabindranath Tagore's work do you know?" Jane looked away for a moment at the ocean. She then looked back deeply into the eyes of her fiancée letting the emotion of the poem infuse her as she attempted to allow Maura to feel each word and syllable. Jane's voice took on the depth and quality of a lover in the most intimate moments as the poems melody and words wound into Maura's heart, mind and soul.

"Servant: Have Mercy upon your servant, my queen!

Queen: The assembly is over and my servants are all gone. Why do you come at this late hour?

Servant: When you have finished with others, this is my time. I come to ask what remains for your last servant to do.

QUEEN: What can you expect when it is too late?

SERVANT: Make me the gardener of your flower garden.

QUEEN: What folly is this?

SERVANT: I will give up my other work. I will throw my swords and lances down in the dust. Do not send  
>me to distant courts; do not bid me undertake new conquests. But make me the gardener of your flower garden.<p>

QUEEN: What will your duties be?

SERVANT: The service of your idle days. I will keep fresh the grassy path where you walk in the morning,  
>where your feet will be greeted with praise at every step by the flowers eager for death. I will swing you in a swing among the branches of the saptaparna, where the early evening moon will struggle<br>to kiss your skirt through the leaves. I will replenish with scented oil the lamp that burns by your  
>bedside, and decorate your footstool with sandal and saffron paste in wondrous designs.<p>

QUEEN: What will you have for your reward?

SERVANT: To be allowed to hold your little fists like tender lotus-buds and slip flower chains over your wrists; to tinge the soles of your feet with the red juice of ashoka petals and kiss away the speck of dust that may chance to linger there.

QUEEN: Your prayers are granted, my servant, you will be the gardener of my flower garden." Jane's gentle voice ended the first stanza of the poem her grandfather had taught her a long time ago.

"So beautiful. So simply beautiful." Maura said as she looked into the depths of Jane's soul and saw the hero, the woman, and the lover who walked side by side. "How do you know the poem?" Jane smiled and blushed a little.

"My grandfather would sit next to the bed at night and read to me. He didn't read only the fairytales of childhood, but he read of philosophers and learned men. Frankie and Tommy never would sit and listen, but I did. I never could get enough of the way his voice would bring the words to life. It's why I love it when you googlemouth. You remind me of him, of his voice, of the depth of your care." Jane had locked memories of those times deeply only opening them when the demons and monsters haunted her dreams or life took on the more difficult trials. A gentle tear ran down Maura's cheek as the two ladies ate their dinner. Once finished and the check was paid Maura and Jane walked down the beach. Jane looked at Maura smiling. Maura looked up curious to why Jane was smiling.

"What? Why are you smiling?" Maura asked as she bumped Jane's hip a little playing with the detective. Jane bumped her back pulling her into a hug.

"I like seeing you at peace. It's been a while since I have seen you without stress and strain on your face." Jane said locating a flat rock on the beach. She pulled Maura down on to the rock and into her lap. They had left their bags back at the restaurant with the hostess while they went for a short walk. Maura nodded snuggling into Jane's arms.

"A lot of it has to do with you. You have changed my world so much Jane. The time we spend together is healing so many holes inside of me. I don't think you realize the power your love has or how completely desolate this life would be without it." Maura said as she planted a soft kiss over her loves pulse point. Jane sighed deeply tightening her arms around Maura. "What about your peace Jane? Do you feel at peace?" Maura asked softly just loud enough though to be heard above the waves washing into shore.

"I'm getting there Maura, but yes. More than I have felt in a while." Jane looked down at Maura. "You're the reason for that. You give me that peace; provide me a shelter within the storms that life throws at me. I don't even want to conceive of what my life would be like without you. Hoyt was right that day in the prison. He knew you were my greatest weakness." Maura went to protest, but Jane covered her lips with her own kissing her attempting to convey her swirling emotions. A little whimper escaped Maura's lips even as they broke apart. "What he didn't realize is you're my greatest strength. I would walk through fire for you. I would fight the denizens of the deepest darkest hell for you. Your love strengthens and fulfills me that much Maur." Maura felt tears run down her cheek. She had never expected to be that for anyone. She had hoped only to find a kind man one day who would stand by her until his death, more out of convenience. There would be love, but nothing like the love she had found with Jane nothing so overwhelmingly complete and fulfilling like being in love and loved by Jane Rizzoli.

"You have no idea how amazing and wonderful that is to hear Jane. I feel like Mary Bailey from 'It's a Wonderful Life'. You rescued me Jane from a solitary, lonely existence. George mattered in that film more than he knew until Clarence showed him. You matter Jane more than you know or understand and I hope to show you the rest of your life." Jane had tears running down her face. She knew people loved her, but to be told you matter in the way Maura told her struck Jane deeply. She kissed her fiancée letting the emotion over take her.

"I love you Maura Isles. Please take me home." Maura nodded letting their love buoy her. The two walked back to the restaurant to get their packages and catch a cab. Maura was relieved that everything was beginning to fall into place for her and Jane.


	38. Chapter 38

**Glazed Feelings **

**Part 38**

**Rizzoli and Isles are the property of TNT and Tess Gerritson.**

Jane woke to Maura's naked form sprawled across her body. They had returned home where Maura had made a thorough examination of Jane's body assuring herself that the detective's earlier pain was nothing serious. Now hours later in the early morning Jane was restless, being pulled from her sleep by whispers of the shadows that were haunting her. Normally Maura's presence was enough to banish their hold on her and keep them at bay, but not at the moment. Carefully so as not to disturb the exhausted woman Jane removed herself from the bed. She dressed in loose fitting sweats and a t-shirt. She slipped out of the bedroom and headed toward the patio doors. She needed to think, to fight inside, and to banish the darkness attempting to consume her. She needed to confront them for once and end these long nights of torture. Maura and she had talked about it last night, but Maura had argued that Dr. Fontaine needed to be there to help Jane. Jane had disagreed saying she was strong enough to take them on, but worried inside she was what Eric called her…weak. Jane moved down the stairs of the porch area to the beach below. She wandered alone along the beach until the house was out of sight. She had come to a nearby set of black rock that was worn from erosion in the elements. Unbeknownst to Jane she was being observed and followed. The detective climbed up picking her way, following it to where it jutted into the darken ocean until she had reached the tip. She found a flat rock where the sea wash would not reach her and sat down. She had sat there for about twenty minutes centering herself staring into the blackened night as the waters churned and boiled around her crashing against the rocks in an attempt to reach her. She felt them here. They were always with her, but here she could feel them.

"You can come out. You don't have to hang in the shadows. I'm here." Jane called out angrily. Some would have wondered about the woman on the rocks in the dead of night calling into the dark for unseen specters. Dead, yes the dead haunted Jane in her mind so it was not surprising when up out of the deep ocean and the rocky darkness rose Jane's captors Hoyt and Eric Leonard. They walked among the stones toward Jane with ease, picking a path that would lead straight to her. On the wind Jane could hear the whisper of their voices.

"Come to join us Jane? Why have you sought the dead among the living?" Eric called ethereally across the crash of the waves. "Finally willing to admit you belong to us. You are weak Jane. Did you think the death would really banish us from you?" Jane girded herself with Maura's loving words, her grandfather's stories, and her families love.

"No, it's time for you to leave for good." Jane said as her voice cracked in her with a smidge of fear. _"Show no fear, show no fear. This is only your mind. You can fight it. You can control it."_

"Where's Doctor Isles Jane? Left her alone? Does not her warm flesh hold you to her? Do her loving words calm the fear Jane? You can't imagine how lovely her blood felt on my hands Jane so sweet, sticky, and warm." Hoyt's voice called sending a shiver down Jane's spine. It caused her to doubt her ability to confront her demons. Hoyt had worked in deep, deeper than Eric. But the two together were an even match for her mind. Something in Hoyt's hand caught a flash of light in the dark and Jane knew instantly what it was as she was thrown back into that dark, dingy basement with the smell of death around her. "You are mine Jane. I will not release my hold on you. I will have you, if not fully in this life then in the next." Jane tried to pull up a memory of her mother holding her in her bed protecting her.

"No! I will not let you control me anymore. I will not fear you." Jane stepped forward threateningly stumbling on the rocks and pitching forward. She fought for sudden purchase not realizing how close to the end she had come on the rocks. Hoyt laughed as Eric's laughter joined in echoing in Jane's mind.

"You can't stop us Jane. We have all the weapons we need to control you." Hoyt's voice called out as the memory of being pinned to the basement floor with scalpels came back to Jane. It was like white hot fire screaming through her hands and down her arms. Jane screamed in pain. Jane looked up at Hoyt's specter laughing. "You'll never win. We abide in your mind. Did you really think your grandfather's words would help?" Hoyt came even with Jane his voice whispering into her ear as the scalpel traced her cheek. Jane jumped back shocked that she could feel it. "How does it feel Jane to bed Doctor Isles? I would love to have her heavenly flesh." Jane pulled back stumbling into a rock and landing sideways.

"Nooo! She's mine Hoyt. You will not have her. You will not sully those memories." Jane wrapped her arms around her desperately trying to center herself. This had been a stupid idea to try and combat her demons on her own. She needed Maura and Dr. Fontaine she knew that now. Her carefully constructed walls in her mind had broken down with her recent fight for life against Eric and her doubt in Maura.

"Yes Jane. You doubt her words don't you? She left you. She accused you of not loving her, not caring. She chose the sperm donor over you. How could she do that Jane?" Eric called to Jane softly as the thought wormed its way into that part of Jane where uncertainty abided. "We didn't leave you. We have pursued you Jane and continue to pursue you. We know your weaknesses Jane. Come to us. Give yourself over to us. Why lay with one who betrayed you?" Eric now reached out to Jane. The knife he used to cut her while hanging on the tree appeared. It brushed over the spots on Jane's body where he had cut her igniting fire and pain. "See…marked you are by us…you are ours." Jane watched as the specters backed up a few steps beckoning her toward them. "Come Jane…Come with us." Jane didn't see the two figures moving quickly over the rocks toward her their movements desperate and worried as they sought to reach her.

"Nooo! I can't. I forgave her. She forgave me." Jane cried out as she rose taking a step forward as she fought to banish them. She grabbed her head as she concentrated hard to cage them to deny their lies.

"Weak Jane, your weak…couldn't take me down even when you had everything you needed. It took your brother Tommy to stop me. I had you Jane. Remember the bullet piercing your shoulder. Remember the cold water Jane sapping your strength. Weak Jane, you will never be strong enough to defeat us." Jane's ire rose inside as she fought back causing the specters to fade somewhat.

"No! I will banish you." Jane said as she lurched forward to punch Eric and lost her footing. She looked up into Eric's face as she began to fall to see a sickly grin.

"Gotcha! See you soon Jane!" Then Eric was gone.

"Jane!" Jane's forward momentum was arrested by strong hands.

"I have you, Jane. I have you. Hang on." Maura said as she held on to her lover who now hung from the medical examiners hold over the broiling rocky water below. Dr. Fontaine was close behind and grabbed Jane allowing Maura to finally pull her back. They helped Jane to a nearby rock where the detective broke down.

"God Jane! What were you thinking? How could you?" Maura grabbed hold of Jane hugging her tightly. "I can't lose you Jane. I can't…" Jane pulled her head off Maura's shoulder.

"I thought I could banish them on my own. What good am I Maura if I can't control my mind? What good am I if I can't control the fear?" Jane asked terrified of being rejected by her lover again. She believed Eric and Hoyts' words.

"You are not weak! You fought Eric and survived even with pneumonia and a gunshot wound. You fought when his apprentice would have killed you." Suddenly Jane blanched and Maura inhaled sharply. They hadn't told Jane about the apprentice. Now the cat was out of the bag.

"Apprentice? Oh God no, not again. I can't do this again." Jane started babbling as she shoved out of Maura's arms. "You lied to me! You knew and you never told me." Jane yelled as she crawled over the rocks back toward shore. Maura and Dr. Fontaine followed desperate to get the anxious woman under control and calm.

"I was going to tell you Jane. We hadn't gotten to that point yet. You didn't need the burden of it yet. It was agreed to by Korsak, Frost, and I. We didn't need you relapsing. Please Jane stop and listen." Maura shouted at the retreating woman. Jane was off the rocks now running. Maura and Dr. Fontaine were soon after her. Maur out distanced Dr. Fontaine and tackled Jane hoping she didn't hurt her. "You will listen Jane. I did not lie!" Jane tried to flip Maura off, but her body was too tired from the run. "LOOK AT ME!" Maura yelled getting Jane's attention. "I love you! I would not lie to you. I need you Jane! Listen to me please!" Maura's voice cried. She leaned down and kissed Jane trying to get her to listen. "Baby hear me, please." Jane's heartbeat began to slow. The wild, crazy feeling that had griped her when Maura told her of the apprentice fled leaving only an exhausted and hurting woman. "I love you. I did not lie Jane. We didn't tell you because you were unconscious and recovering. I promise on my life Jane." Jane's tears came freely and quietly as she pulled Maura into a hug. Dr. Fontaine walked up and waited a few minutes before she cleared her throat. The two women parted as Maura helped Jane to her feet.

"It's time Jane. No more avoiding. Maura please make some coffee and bring it to the porch." Maura hesitated for a moment. She nodded and kissed Jane.

"Please, let her help you. I need you Jane." Maura turned and walked toward the house. Dr. Fontaine looked at Jane and gently took her by the arm. The doctor helped her to the porch and directed her to a chair. "Tell me about Hoyt." Jane began slowly telling the doctor about Hoyt. When Maura brought cups of coffee and the carafe they stopped. Jane took a sip grabbing Maura's hand and squeezing it. Maura looked over at Dr. Fontaine who shook her head dismissing her. Maura kissed Jane and went inside to shower. She then made a fire in the fireplace and began reading the latest journals she had brought glancing every once in a while to the porch. Outside, Jane had continued her story finishing it.

"You were amazingly strong. I have read the trial accounts. You testified against him even as he taunted you in the stand. Why?" Dr. Fontaine asked as she looked at Jane. Jane shook her head not understanding the question.

"What do you mean? He killed those women. He attempted to kill me and one other. He needed to be put away." Jane said angrily.

"You didn't need to testify Jane. The evidence would have spoken for itself. It would have put him away for lifetimes alone. You insisted on testifying. Why?" Dr. Fontaine pushed knowing Jane needed to hear the reason aloud.

"It's enough I did." Jane shouted standing up and trying to walk away. Dr. Fontaine blocked her path as she saw movement inside the house. She prayed Maura stayed put.

"Why?" Dr. Fontaine shouted at Jane. Jane turned away battling with herself, with the voices in her head. Suddenly she turned back screaming.

"I didn't want him to think he broke me. I didn't want my family and friends to see me as weak." Jane panted and gasped. "I'll be damned if any man will ever make me feel helpless like that again. If anyone will make me feel pathetic and fragile. I was so damn scared. I would have done anything he said to save my life." Jane turned and moved quickly to the rail leaning against it. Tears poured down her face as she gripped the wood turning her knuckles white.

"Now tell me about Hoyt's apprentice." Jane looked at the waters thinking about Hoyt. Dr. Fontaine was relentless. She was not letting Jane hide or run. She turned away and spoke with the doctor about the events leading up to her second capture by Hoyt. When the monster became her own personal demon and she banished any hope of having anyone close again.


	39. Chapter 39

**Glazed Feeling**

**Part 39**

**Rizzoli and Isles are the property of TNT and Tess Gerritson. I must apologize. I am not sure how many of you are hanging with me on this fanfics, but know it is a slower process because I want to get it right. Please bear with me here! As always let me know what you think your humble bard, Deanlu.**

"You obviously didn't push Maura away after Hoyt came after you the second time. In fact, by your own admission you needed her, desperately needed her to give you some balance. Why did you try to push her away when Peter came after you? I mean you were engaged. Maura knew the risks by then." Dr. Fontaine asked Jane who sat wearily in the chair opposite of the doctor. Jane was tired. The two ladies had been at it now for hours excising one tortured moment after another. Jane had made it through Hoyt's first and second attack, the presents that had shown up in Jane's apartment from Hoyt over the years without her finding out how they got there, Maura's kidnapping when Jane felt totally out of control and would have offered her soul to get the doctor back safely, and now they had arrived at Peter. The sun was up on only their third day there and Jane felt more tired now than when she arrived.

"She doesn't know the risks. Not truly. I have to protect her. I am her protector. I couldn't handle if anything happened to her. If I let her down" Jane's voice became a whisper as another voice intruded…_betrayed her…_Eric's voice whispered softly in Jane's ear. It caused Jane to feel nauseous and transported her back to the warehouse. Jane watched as it was recalled from memory: _Patty Doyle shooting Dean, Jane raising the gun and hearing faintly Maura scream "No", then shooting Patty Doyle, the sound of the crack of the railing as Patty Doyle fell through the railing and then the dull thud as he hit the ground, watching as Maura ran to the mobster, and then yell at her "Don't touch him." Weak Jane, what did it matter what Maura thought. You were protecting your partner and yourself. She doesn't understand Jane because she really doesn't love you. _

"No, she does. She does love me. She made a mistake. We all make mistakes." Jane said aloud as she stared off into nothing. Dr. Fontaine motioned for Maura to come closer. Maura had come out to bring something for the two women to eat when Dr. Fontaine held up her hand to stop her. Jane had slipped out of the session in her mind. Maura set the food nearby quietly and then knelt before Jane as instructed by the doctor. Maura took Jane's hands in her own.

"Jane, I made a mistake. Please honey, come back to me. Let Eric go Jane. You belong to me. I'm so sorry I let you down Jane. I am so sorry love." Jane came slowly back as she heard Maura's voice. "Please trust me when I say I will work harder to rebuild that trust. I can't promise I won't make mistakes again, but I will never lock you out or turn away from you. I can promise that love." Maura said watching the glazed look leave Jane's eyes and for the first time in a while brightness return to them that had been missing. Jane nodded saying nothing, but pulled Maura into a hug.

"I think that will be all for now. I will see you later today. You need to rest Jane, take your medication, and be with Maura." Dr. Fontaine rose and began to walk down to the beach. She turned before she left the last step. "No more walks on the beach at night without Maura or I. No more handling these demons that haunt you alone. Though, I think Hoyt will not bother you as much. We now need to deal with Eric." Jane watched at the Doctor walked away as she held Maura. Yes, Hoyt had been strangely silent since she had talked to the doctor. She knew he was there in the back of her mind, but he seemed to be less threatening now. She could see he was dead that he could not hurt her anymore. She had in essence released his overwhelming shadow that had threatened to drown her. Now she needed to excise Eric and learn new ways to deal with the ones which would come after him so she could be the wife Maura needed and desired.

"Hey, how about we go inside and eat lunch? Then spend some time cuddling and resting Jane?" Jane sighed as she pulled back from Maura looking her lover, fiancée, and soon to be wife in the eyes. How was Maura this strong and she was this weak.

"I'm going crazy aren't I?" Jane asked her love watching her eyes worried that Maura would confirm the truth in them. Maura's eyes neither confirmed it nor turned away from the question. Instead they took on a strength and vibrancy that startled Jane.

"No, you are not going crazy Jane. You have run from one trauma to the next for over the last year and a half. Most people would have given up by now on life or even trying with as much as you have experienced, but not you. You have pushed it to the back of your mind burying it so deep that when you have finally come to the point where everything you thought you knew to be true fell apart the trauma pushed to the surface." Maura said with a surety that calmed Jane. Jane thought about what Maura said realizing it wasn't Maura's betrayal that had started this process. No, it had been when she was shot and woken to the find in the weeks that followed that her parents were divorcing. It had been an added shock to Bobby's betrayal of the code of blue he had taken when he had become a police officer. Jane knew cops turned bad. She wasn't stupid, but this had been Bobby. He had been a friend who she had gone through the academy with, been invited to his home for parties, and worked with over the years. It had been painful to see the betrayal so deeply. Then the divorce of her parents had been a major shock. Maura's turning her back on her had been the final straw that snapped the back of the camel so to speak.

"Jane? Honey, where are you?" Maura called softly leaning forward letting her forehead rest against Jane's.

"I was wrong." Jane looked into Maura's eyes. Maura's heart squeezed tightly afraid of what Jane was wrong about. "I should have listened to you after Hoyt's second attack and seen someone. I was afraid though they wouldn't let me come back to work. I was afraid they would bench me to a desk job because I was so messed up inside. I had seen Korsak, Crowe, and the other's go through so much trauma. They would see the department shrink for the allotted amount of time never acting like any of it bothered them." Jane looked into Maura's eyes. "I can't be different than them Maura. I can't show weakness in any way or they will treat me like someone who is…_No, don't tell her. She can't understand Jane. You'll lose her if you tell her." Eric's voice tried to stop Jane._ Maura could tell a battle had been joined in Jane. She was figuring things out inside. Eric didn't stand a chance. A Rizzoli never back down, Jane never backed down. She would fight through the fear and pain to reach the goal she had set.

"How Jane? How will they treat you?" Maura asked softly, barely a breath of voice like the wind caressing the ear gently.

"Weak. Oh God Maura I am weak. How can you want me? How could Frost want to be my partner? I knew Korsak would look at me different so I requested a new partner. How could ma want me as a daughter?" The torrent left Jane's lips not slowing down until Maura leaned forward and kissed Jane deepening it till the detective could think of nothing more than that kiss and the love it embodied. It lasted for a long time. It wasn't desperate, and furious, but it was long, slow, sensuous, and conveyed every emotion that it could between the two women. When they broke apart Jane felt a sereneness that was not there before and a clarity that forced her to accept what her heart had always tried to tell her.

"Love does not make you weak. Frost trusts you because you are a trained professional police officer who has battled evil in the past and won. It has scarred you and created a determination in you to protect those who are innocent. Korsak has never seen you as weak and for a long time was bewildered on why you changed partners. In time that has healed between you both. He loves you as a daughter and he is amazed at how you never back down." Now Maura knelt before Jane pulling her blouse off and taking Jane's hand.

"Maura, what are you…" Jane began asking as the doctor placed the detectives hand over her heart.

"You feel that Jane? This heart beats for you. Only you Jane! A thousand times at a thousand different crime scenes I could have died or been killed. You have always placed my safety first above yours. You have defended my honor Jane. When they called me Queen of the Dead or when they would snicker making jokes about my weirdness you were the one who ran to my defense. Not one man I dated ever did that Jane. Some would even join in the teasing. Not you, not once Jane. I can't tell you the number of times you shocked, encouraged, and warmed my heart from your defense of me. The number of detectives that suffered bloody, broken noses, strange limps, and their wives coming to the precinct unannounced to ask about their problem. You have always been there Jane. Feel the beat of this heart Jane it beats for you because you own it Jane. You are not weak. A weak person would have done none of the things you have done for me." Maura said as a fiery joie de vivre reflected out of the young woman's eyes infusing Jane with its fire. Jane closed her eyes letting the fire reach down into her destroying the mind numbing lethargy and chaos that had taken control. Jane's eyes opened to gaze on her lover's fiery countenance. Maura had not budged, if anything the doctor's eyes had taken on even more fire than before Jane had closed hers. Jane rose sweeping Maura off her feet and carrying her into the house.

"Maura Isles I love you." Jane said even as Maura enveloped her into another deep, sensuous kiss. The only sound heard next was the slamming of the bedroom door followed by Maura's final coherent words.

"Oh Jane!" Maura's breathless, gasp echoed through the house.


	40. Chapter 40

**Glazed Feelings**

**Part 40**

**Rizzoli and Isles are the property of TNT and Tess Gerritson. I am just borrowing them for a little angst. Well, I am hoping we have hit the bottom with Jane and now we are on the upward climb. Hope you all enjoy your humble bard, Deanlu.**

"Breath in, breath out, good Jane… that's it keep going honey." Maura watched as Jane worked through her Vinyasa yoga positions while the sound of the waves washing ashore came through the patio doors. Maura had taken the lead as teacher making sure Jane did not over do or hurt anything. They had decided on a session of yoga after Jane had suffered a terrible muscles spasm in the base of her back from lack of exercise and a little too strenuous lovemaking earlier.

"Good now begin in downward facing dog." Maura watched as Jane curled her toes under and pushed back raising her hips and straightening her legs. Maura could see a slight hitch in Jane's breathing as muscles which had not been used in such a manner now fought to follow form and flow again.

"Now plank pose Jane, inhale and come forward into plank pose." Maura watched as Jane transitioned. "Good, inhale…exhale… Knees, chest, and chin pose Jane." Maura watched as Jane slowly transitioned keeping her breath in a steady cadence. Jane was beginning to relax inside. The earlier stress of the sessions with Dr. Fontaine and then Maura's heartfelt confession had thrown Jane into disarray. Now as she concentrated on her breathing and flowing through the positions several key revelations came into her mind. The first and foremost was that she had isolated herself causing the trauma's to take a greater toll than they should have.

"Good Jane, Cobra pose…inhale, exhale…." Maura's warm, rich voice resonated and reaffirmed her love for Jane as the detective worked to make muscles which had started to atrophy break free once again and flow. The second revelation came as Jane rose in cobra pose. It was a shock and disturbed her breathing momentarily causing Maura to bend near and listen closer to the detective's breathing pattern.

"Inhale…exhale…work through the pain Jane…good…downward dog again Jane." Jane moved into downward dog as tears began to fall. She could see the moment she had begun fighting against Maura's comfort and love. She had sought out the soulless existence of her job trying to shove the medical examiner away when Ian had come into their lives. Maura's hiding of the old relationship from her had caused Jane to doubt Maura's love deeply. After all, Maura had said he was the great love of her life, so what did that make Jane?

"Good…inhale…exhale…plank pose again." Maura could tell Jane was troubled by something. Her form was good, but her face had moved into that look that said she was in deep thought. Maura knew yoga could have that effect on Jane. It was opposite to everything she had been taught. For Jane it allowed her mind to puzzle out problems and come up with answers no one could normally figure out in cases.

"Good Jane…chaturanga dandasana…concentrate Jane." Finally, Jane admitted the last revelation was true. She had been deliberately throwing herself into dangerous situations. Situations that would prove she wasn't this hero cop, even to those close to her.

"Upward facing dog…concentrate on your breathing." Jane was beginning to lose her cadence and rhythm as these three revelations swirled into her mind forcing her to realize she had to make some changes, ask Maura some serious questions, and tell Maura about what she had been doing. She believed the doctor would not run now, but she could see it was going to cause some hurt.

"Now, downward facing dog." Jane came to the end of forms exhaling deeply and rose to stand a little taller. Maura moved forward handing Jane a water bottle. "Better now?" Maura asked sensing a deep resolve to talk about something. Maura braced herself for the coming storm of emotion.

"Yeah, it doesn't feel as tight anymore. Thank you." Jane said as she took sip of her water. Maura moved behind Jane running her hands over Jane's lower back. Yes, Jane's lower back muscles had given up their fight. Maura wrapped her arms around Jane's waist and leaned against the detective's back. "So what is wrong? I could tell toward the end of the yoga when you went into chaturanga dandasana that something occurred to you." Maura asked softly attempting to get to the bottom of the problem. Jane turned smirking a little.

"I am never going to be able to hide anything from you. Not even when I sneak out with Frost for greasy burgers and fries." Jane said chuckling pulling Maura around into her arms and kissing her softly. Maura smiled, but didn't let the detective off the hook.

"I would never make you sneak out for greasy burgers and fries with Frost. You know I would be right next to you after them." Maura said as Jane laughed.

"That's true." Jane hugged Maura just enjoying her lover.

"Come on Jane, tell me what's going on inside. We need to get it out so it doesn't cause more problems down the line honey." Maura said softly nuzzling into Jane's arms.

"Yeah, you're right. I just worry that you will…but we talked about that." Jane said tightening her grip on Maura for a minute. "Can we walk on the beach a little while the suns still up? I promise no more problems." Maura nodded and wrapped her left arm around the detective. They headed out the doors and down to the beach. They walked the opposite direction from Jane's run in with her demons the night before. Maura pointed out some boats off shore and they picked up shells while Jane took her time to center herself. Finally, Jane seemed to come to some decision and stopped to sit down. She pulled Maura down next to her. She turned taking Maura's hands into hers and letting Maura drape a leg around her. Jane knew it for what it was Maura reassuring her she would not run.

"First, I want to apologize." Maura started to protest, but Jane stopped her. "No, you have to listen this time. I haven't been fair to you. I seem to have placed this major amount of blame on your shoulders that you do not nor should take ownership for Maur." Jane looked at Maura who seemed to be having trouble keeping quiet, but was using all her patience to do so. "I've figured out a couple of things. One, while Hoyt, Peter, and Eric have played a major part in all this turmoil inside me they didn't cause this emotional…break I'm having." _Come on Jane you can say this to her. She loves you. Jane thought to herself. _ Strangely Eric was silent not contributing to the conversation for once. "I did by pushing people away who cared and isolating myself. I believed I was strong enough to handle everything and for a while I was doing okay." Jane gripped Maura's hands. "Then the shooting occurred. Afterwards it never seemed to go back to normal. I felt like the ground was always moving below my feet. I didn't feel connected to anything or anyone." Jane looked into her lover's eyes seeing understanding there. "I think you know what I mean when I say that." Maura nodded her head still waiting for the rest. Jane let go of Maur's hands and started to pick at her scars. Maura stopped her by placing Jane's hands in her own.

"Go on Jane I'm listening." Maura said as she gripped Jane's hands massaging the scars that had begun to hurt with the tension the detective was starting to feel again. Jane sighed there was no way around the next part. She just needed to say it to clear the air.

"When Ian showed up and you called him the love of your life I figured I would always be second best for you." Maura gasped shaking her head. Jane quickly moved on not letting Maura answer scared of what the doctor would say. "I can live with that Maura, but I will tell you that I will take better care of you than that love of your life, you will never feel the pain of separation, longing, or hurt of being spurned. I will fight for you no matter what and for any children we one day have together. I promise Maura that you will never feel alone again. I promise with every ounce of my body and blood, till my last dying breath I will be there by you. I just wish I could have been that love of your life, but it doesn't matter because I am the one who will stand next to you, for you until the end." Jane said feeling a weight lift from her shoulders she hadn't realized she carried. She could love Maura forever and enjoy what the medical examiner would give her even if it wasn't everything.

"You foolish, stupid, lovely, gorgeous woman!" Maura said as tears came running down her face. She had never thought Ian's memory or presence could have hurt Jane so bad. She should have told her by now that she was wrong. The doctor reached out grabbing the sides of Jane's face forcing the detective to look at her and listen. "I figured out a while after Ian left I was wrong Jane. The love of your life should be by your side, protect you, comfort you, and laugh with you. The love of your life should have nights of drunken giggling, arguments when they know your making mistakes, and passionate love making that makes your insides melt and your world click into place. They should be there when people let you down and even when you let yourself down. You Jane! You and You only are the love of my life. I never really knew what that meant until you came into my life. Ian pales next to you Jane." Jane's face burst into a smile so bright it could have blinded Maura had it been the sun. Jane swept Maura into a hug holding her so tightly she could have broken the young woman. Maura just molded herself into Jane feeling like she was becoming one with her. They stayed like that for a long time and then Jane let Maura go allowing her to sink back down to the sand.

"Finally, I need you to know I am partly to blame for Doyle's injury. While it's true that yes I followed the book Maura…Oh God, how do I tell you this without you hating me." Jane said struggling with this last piece. Maura grabbed Jane's chin gently, raising it till their eyes met.

"I will not hate you Jane. Be mad maybe, but not enough to push you away only enough to work through it with you." Jane saw the confirmation in the doctor's eyes again and prayed Maura followed through on that statement.

"I deliberately stepped into Patty Doyle's line of fire so he would shoot me." Jane said as in the next second she felt a hard slap against her face. The rage and anger she saw in Maura's eyes almost set Jane on fire right where she was sitting and not the good way. Maura for her part fought the urge to run, but not to yell.

"You did what Jane?" The low angry guttural growl that left Maura's lips caused cold, white hot fear to slide down Jane's spine. Jane for her part had expected it, but wasn't ready for the emotional storm that was released on her. "Why would you do that?" Maura yelled. "We were engaged Jane. You promised to come home to me safely every night. Do you know how devastated I would have been Jane? Do you even care how much it would hurt? How much it would rip from my heart and soul? God, why would you even think that was a solution to anything? How…Why…?" Maura was so mad she could barely get words out. Jane did the only thing she knew to do she plunged forward with the explanation.

"I knew it would hurt you. I wasn't thinking Maura. I was in so much grief over the events that had happened since the shooting. After Hoyt grabbed us in the prison I seriously felt that it would have been better if I wasn't around then no one would be hurt. You know how the killers always come after me. I just thought it would be easier. No one would get hurt then." Jane felt a second slap harder than the last one.

"No one would get hurt! How could you be so selfish! Do you have any idea how…?" Jane covered her loves lips with her fingers even as Maura fumed.

"No, I didn't Maura. I couldn't see past my pain and everyone else was busy with their problems. No one really asked about me. Once I was on my feet and all was good everyone went about their life. You even spent less time with me Maura. So I just wasn't thinking correctly. I can lie really well Maura. You weren't looking for it. It was so easy. Then Ian came along and I tried to be there a little less. Then the shooting in the warehouse and figuring out it was the FBI agent. I can still hear the click of the gun under my chin Maura." Jane closed her eyes listening to Maura's breathing and the beating of her heart. "I'm so sorry Maura. I can promise you I don't feel like that anymore. These last few days, and the last few weeks have given me a lot to think about. You saved me Maura. You came back when I least expected it. You have fought for me even when it's been painful. You may not stand in the way of physical bullets, but you have for the emotional and mental ones. I am so sorry love." Jane said opening her eyes to a still angry doctor, but she knew it was because Maura loved her.

"Jane Clementine Rizzoli, God help me if you ever do something that stupid again there will be no hole deep and dark enough for you to hide from my wrath. Do you understand me Jane?" The detective nodded seeing the wild angry look of her love. "You will promise me that you will always take as much care as possible to come home to me and our family at night. Do you understand?" Jane nodded as Maura grabbed her by the back of her neck kissing her hard and deep. When Maura thought about all the times Jane had been hurt since the shooting a lot made sense now. She had thought it was just a bad year, but now things clicked into place. She could have lost Jane at any time and would never have known that the detective was not avoiding physical danger. Just then Jane's broke away from the kiss and looked down the beach behind Maura.

"Help, please help." Jane took off running before she even thought of what she was doing. "Help, please yelled the young woman. Jane reached her in minutes.

"What's wrong?" Jane asked the young woman. Jane could tell she was in a heightened state of panic.

"My son, he was in the waves. He…THERE! He can't…" Before the woman could finish Jane had stripped her coat off and dropped her pants. She ran into the surf and began swimming as fast as she could toward the blond headed boy. Maura reached the woman and called 911. Jane was feet from the boy now and could tell he was taking in a lot of sea water. Abruptly, five feet from him the boy went under and didn't come back up. Jane dove under and could just make out his form in the gloomy deep as he sank. Jane never thought twice as she swam downward, clearing her ears once from the pressure and then twice while reaching forward to grab the boys arm. Jane pulled him upward clearing her ears again against the pressure. She could just see the surface even as the oxygen began to dwindle to nothing.

"_Come on Jane." _Maura thought as she watched for any sign of her love or the boy. Maura held the mother close as the dark waters of the Atlantic boiled and bubbled on the surface. Maura could hear the sirens of emergency personnel even as she began to lose hope. Jane wasn't supposed to do anything this strenuous due to her lung. The pressure could cause her to relapse. Suddenly, Jane's head broke the surface as she gulped in a desperate breath of air. She lay back in the water pulling the boy onto her chest. She ignored the pain in ribs as she started rescue breathing. She heard a fast approaching boat, but continued breathing for the boy. The shadow of a rescue dingy covered her even as she continued to force air into the boy's lungs. Unknown hands grabbed the boy pulling him into the boat. Next Jane was pulled into the boat and wrapped into a thick blanket. Jane watched as the emergency personnel performed rescue breathing and then CPR. She prayed like she had never prayed before for one good thing to happen out of all the bad lately.

"We have a heartbeat." The boy began coughing up water. They were at the pier in no time. The boy was loaded onto a gurney and rushed to a nearby ambulance. Jane was being helped out of the boat and arguing with emergency personnel.

"I don't care what protocol calls for just give me the damn AMA forms and let me go home." Jane argued with the second ambulance crew.

"Don't argue with a Homicide cop in her underwear Jerry. If she had her gun she would probably shoot you." Aine McCalister said as he came rushing up with a worried Doctor Isles. Maura engulfed Jane in a bear hug.

"But Aine, she's blue in places a person shouldn't be blue. That's not exactly warm water out there." Jerry, the paramedic stated.

"She bleeds blue Jerry. She is a cop. This is Doctor Isles. She will vouch for the detectives care." Aine said as Maura helped Jane into the pants and coat she left on the beach. Jerry grumbled about how it ain't right to refuse medical help, but he let Jane sign the AMA forms. Aine helped Jane and Maura back to his car.

"Sorry you have to ride in the back Jane. I can tell you I haven't had anyone in it today. I can also tell you old Sadie cleans them daily so they aren't as bad as the Boston ones are I bet." Aine said chuckling. Jane smiled.

"It's fine Aine. I just need to get home and in the hot tub on the porch. Then I'll be fine." Jane said though she had a deep throbbing in her side where she had surgery. It would be better to tell Maura at home. Maura was strangely quiet which worried Jane. Aine helped Maura get Jane in the car and then pulled an extra blanket from the back when he saw her shivering. Jane was now covered in two blankets and Maura was wrapped around her. Aine pulled out heading back to their beach house

"Baby, you okay?" Jane asked.

"Yes Jane, just trying to figure out how to reward and punish you at the same time." Maura said softly. "Oh and don't think your off the hook for your earlier confession! You will still need to do some talking with me and I am going to be very watchful over you for a while!" Jane smiled and felt a gentle slap against her chest. She grimaced a little from a wave of pain. "What's wrong Jane?" Jane was about to deny there was anything wrong, but thought better of it when she caught the look on Maura's face.

"My ribs hurt a little where the surgery was done." Jane said softly. Maura sighed and shook her head.

"Aine, turn the car around and head to the island hospital. Jane needs an x-ray." Maura called to the law officer. Aine turned the car around heading toward the hospital. "What am I going to do with you Jane Rizzoli?

"Just love me Maura. Just love me." Jane whispered closing her eyes as exhaustion pulled on her.

"Oh I do Jane. I do so deeply my hero." Maura whispered as wrapped herself around Jane even more. "Don't you go anywhere without me. You hear me!"

"Always Maura, I always hear you." Jane whispered back as she fell asleep the exhaustion completing its job.


	41. Chapter 41

**Glazed Feelings**

**Deanlu**

**Part 41**

**Rizzoli and Isles are the property of TNT and Tess Gerritson. Thank you for all you continued support, encouragement, and reading. This has not been an easy write and I continue to analyze the characters to decide which direction we should head. I am enjoying the series episodes.**

"That's good Ms. Rizzoli. Let's move you to the left a little now." The X-ray technician, Sadie said as she helped Jane move to the left and placed a foam blocking device to keep her at angle.

"It's Detective Rizzoli please." Jane said softly grimacing as the technician helped her move. She felt nauseous now and her rib was throbbing with deep intensity that was giving her a headache. Jane listened to the hum of the X-ray machine hoping this was the last one. They had already taken three different views.

"Sorry detective. One more and then we are done. We are sending the images via electronic transfer to your doctor. He is waiting on the conference line to speak with you and the attending." Sadie stated in her tired, but bubbly voice. Jane's heart sank. She knew she was in trouble and would be getting yelled at for her actions. On top of it Maura was mad at her still about the revelations. All in all while this had been a great day and gone a long way to fixing holes in their relationship, it over all sucked now. Between Dr. Reynolds, Dr. Fontaine, Maura, and the pain she was feeling it just couldn't get any worse. "There we are detective. Now let me help you up from the table and into the wheel chair." The young woman moved with ease maneuvering Jane's body into the chair with the least amount of stress for the detective. Jane was just so tired and the pain was beginning to grate on her. She felt anxious and knew she would snap at someone soon if she didn't lie down and close her eyes. Jane placed her elbow on the chairs arm and let her head rest on her hand. She closed her eyes letting herself doze as Sadie rolled her back to the emergency room just listening to the noises around her. Before long she felt someone softly shake her awake. "Detective, come on. Let's get you in the bed. Your friend will return soon. She went to get a sandwich and some coffee. Officer McCalister is waiting to speak with you." Jane woke up some, though she was still tired. Sadie helped her into bed with another nurse's assistance. Officer McCalister shuffled into the room after Sadie left.

"Well, you have done it now Rizzoli. The boy you saved happened to be the mayor's grandson. He wants to meet you. He'll probably give you the damn key to the city now." Aine said chuckling. Jane moaned softly closing her eyes. It had gotten worse.

"Dammit, just kill me now. I didn't do anything worth notice." Jane groaned again. Then something occurred to her. "Hey, how is the boy?" Jane asked for the first time forgetting about her pain and problems for a moment.

"Well, he took in a lot of water. They are admitting him overnight and will observe him for a few days. He has had a couple breathing treatments and the normal battery of tests. If all goes well, he should go home in a few days. He should make a full recovery." Aine bent over the bed and looked Jane in the eye. "You took a big risk going after him. Maura told me you had a broken rib and have only been on the mend a couple weeks. You know it takes about two months for a broken rib to heal Jane. What if you had drowned?" Aine asked her seriously eyeing her.

"I never even thought about what could happen. I just saw someone who was in trouble and knew I could do something about it. I forgot about my injuries Aine. How mad is Maura?" Jane asked softly. The headache was beginning to really pound now.

"Not as mad as I should be Jane!" Maura said as she walked into Jane's room. Maura could tell something was wrong, very wrong. "Jane, what is it?" Maura asked as she gazed at her lovers pained face. Aine moved out of the way to let Maura take his place.

"I have a really bad headache and my side is hurting Maur." Jane whispered. She was trying real hard not to yell. Jane closed her eyes again as the nausea over took her. She dry heaved once and then twice. Maura motioned Aine toward the light switch as she grabbed the nearby emesis basin placing it under her chin. Aine turned out the lights, but turned a small light on near the wall. He came over and took Maura's place as she walked to the medical chest. She opened a drawer and pulled out a cloth. She ran cold water from the sink over it and placed it over Jane's eyes. Jane could hear her whispering to Aine. She heard the door open and close. "Maur?" Jane began to rise causing another bout of dry heaves; Maura pushed Jane down on her shoulders.

"I'm here Jane just rest. I'm trying to get something to relieve your pain. Shhh, its okay love." Maura began to massage Jane's neck muscles trying to get the building anxiety to release. Aine returned with the nurse.

"Detective Rizzoli, I am Nurse Phyllis. I need you to tell me on a scale of one to ten how bad the pain is now?"

"A nine I feel like I have been hit by a truck and then backed over again." Jane whispered bracing her hands on the side of her head. Maura moved Jane's hands and massaged her head. The nurse nodded and left. "I'll be right back Jane with something to help." The nurse said softly.

"Hang on Jane. Relief is coming soon." Maura said as she continued to massage Jane's head and shoulders. Maura's touch was helping, but Jane's pain wouldn't relent. The nurse came back into the room with a hypodermic needle and medication. She drew the proper amount.

"Detective Rizzoli I'm going to give you an injection in your arm. You may feel a slight sting." Nurse Phyllis said with a little more volume so Jane heard.

"Okay." Jane said as she felt the swab to her arm and then a slight sting. She really felt nothing because of the pain from her headache. Maura was back massaging Jane's shoulders afterward. Jane soon felt ice packs being placed around the back of her neck. They soothed some of the pain.

"I love you Jane. Just rest please." Maura whispered kissing her forehead softly.

"Okay. Love you too." Jane said as she began to feel a slight detachment from the things going on around her. She soon gave into it and fell soundly asleep. Maura gazed at the detective shaking her head. The doctor rested her forehead against her loves closing her eyes and placed her hand over Jane's heart just listening to the detective breath and her heart beat. She was thankful that at the end of another day she had her fiancée with her.

"She's just so damn…" Aine said softly watching the two women as Jane's face relaxed. Nurse Phyllis monitored her pulse and nodded.

"Frustrating, stubborn, argumentative, and a royal pain in the..." Maura sighed not finishing her statement and sat in a nearby chair as Nurse Phyllis made some notations on Jane's chart. Aine came over and stood next to her.

"Yeah, Jane was all that in school too. I idolized her. She never backed down from anyone or anything. She had more broken bones, bloody noses, cuts, and scratches than I ever saw a girl get. She didn't always win every fight, but she did make her point. I remember this one time a boy in the grade two years ahead of her wanted her lunch. Mama Rizzoli's lunches were school renowned. She told him no and went to walk away. The boy wouldn't take no for an answer. He grabbed hold of her shirt, spun her around, and demanded the lunch." Maura listened to Aine's story with fascination. "The boy reached for the lunch to take it away thinking since he was bigger he could get it with no problem. Jane got this look on her face." Aine looked at Maura now. "You know the one. The one that says you can't make me do anything and I'll be damned if you do." Maura smiled and laughed.

"Yes, I know that look very well. I have seen it many a time. I have even been on the receiving end of it unfortunately." Maura said shivering a little. Aine took his coat off and draped it around Maura.

"Then you're lucky because I have never seen a friend receive it and remain friends with her. Let alone someone whom she loves and trusts." Aine said looking Maura straight in the eye. Maura felt the guilt and shame wrap around her again from their previous estrangement. "You must be someone real special to Jane if she is willing to bend for you." Maura's eyes glistened with unshed tears as she smiled.

"It seems Jane thinks so." Maura said looking toward the detective who now slept peacefully. The doctor looked at Aine as Phyllis left the room. "So what happened?" Aine looked back from where he was pondering something.

"Oh, well Jane kicked the boy in the balls and took off running." Maura gasped in surprise. Aine laughed. "Unfortunately, Jane's kick was a little off. The boy got up fast and chased after her. He caught her on the far side of the playground. He got in five or six good hits before he was pulled off of her. Jane was bruised all over and had a slight concussion. When they got her up she was grinning like a Cheshire cat." Aine said broadly smiling.

"Why would she be grinning?" Maura asked flabbergasted at why Aine was smiling now.

"Because she still had her lunch." Aine said laughing out loud. Maura laughed with him until the detective began to whimper in her sleep. Maura moved back to the bed taking Jane's hand and leaning over whispering in her ear softly sweet nonsense words of love. Jane soon settled back into sleep and Maura took her seat again.

"You are something special Maura Isles. Jane knew what she was doing with you." Aine looked toward his childhood friend. "Glad she could hold on long enough for you to show up. She deserves nothing but the best in life and you are obviously it." Maura looked over at Aine and shook her head.

"No, I am the one who was lucky. Jane has taught me so much about friendship, life, and love. I don't know how I will ever pay her back." Aine smiled again and shook his head.

"Haven't you learned yet Dr. Isles love isn't about who owes who, it's about giving everything and expecting nothing in return. Then being happily surprised when it's returned the same way." Aine looked toward Jane in the bed. "You know the Mayor wants to give her the key to the city, have a parade for her, and hire her for his police force. He is so grateful his grandson is alive. Did Jane tell you she had to clear her ears twice to reach him?"

"No, she didn't. I should have asked them about decompression sickness." Maura said worriedly. Aine shook his head.

"I already had them run the tests. Her blood gases were fine. It's her injuries before and whatever the physical exertion did to her." Aine said as the door to the room opened and Doctor Berkley came into the room.

"Dr. Isles, Officer Aine. Well, I have talked with Dr. Reynolds. We have both looked at the tests and the x-rays. Jane has fractured the repaired rib." Maura hugged herself tightly. "But she should be fine. She needs rest, ice the affected area, and I have some pain meds that we agree she should take. Dr. Reynolds would like to speak with you Dr. Isles." Dr. Berkley handed her his I-pad and touched the Skype button. Dr. Reynolds face appeared and he didn't look too happy.

"Maura, you okay?" Jerry asked making sure Jane was the only one injured.

"Yes, I'm fine. Yes, I know I promised to keep her under control." Maura said as she watched Jerry. Jerry smiled as he saw how miserable Maura looked at this turn of events.

"It seems you can't keep her in bed enough Maura." Maura blushed three shades of red as Aine turned away laughing and Dr. Berkley cleared his throat. "Now that I have sufficiently chastised you in public I'll get down to business. Jane is on strict bed rest the next five days with no activity. None Maura! In five days she is to see Dr. Berkley at his office and be x-rayed again. After that we will proceed forward. I'll send you some more treatment information I want you to follow by email. Dr. Berkley has been brought up to speed on Jane's case. He is whom you will consult if something should go wrong until you return to Boston."

"Yes, Jerry. I'm sorry about this. She had been behaving up until now. Things just happen where Jane is concerned." Maura said miserably. Jerry took pity on her.

"It's not bad Maura, but it could have been. Just keep her in bed even if you have to tie her down." Jerry said smirking a little. Maura blushed again. "Got the message?"

"I have the message Jerry. Thank you." Maura said softly not looking at the other two men in the room.

"Good, when you return I want to see Jane in my office the next day. Oh, by the way. Jane's looks good in wet clothes! Well at least those that she is wearing. She could be pinup of the year you know." Maura's eyes widened.

"What do you mean those that she is wearing?" Maura asked suddenly worried what that meant.

"It seems someone videotaped the rescue and return. They then gave it to the local feed and Boston picked it up. The hero cop has done it again. I bet your phone is ringing off the wall right now for interviews." Jerry chuckled.

"Oh God, she is going to be so pissed. Can you make a DVD copy for me?" Maura asked smiling. Jerry laughed and nodded.

"Yes, I'll make one for you. I'll see you when you get back Maura. Keep her safe please." Jerry said and ended the conference. Dr. Berkley smiled and handed Jane's discharge papers and prescription to Maura.

"She can leave anytime you're ready. She just needs some help home." Dr. Berkley said and then excused himself.

Two hours later, Aine and Maura managed to get a knocked out, limp as a rag doll detective back to the house. Dr. Fontaine had met them at the door. Aine helped Maura get her into the bedroom as Dr. Fontaine set up food for the two friends. Aine got Jane settled in the bed and left for the kitchen. Maura sat next to a sleeping Jane just running her fingers and hand over Jane's features. Maura thought about how close Jane came to dying today without knowing it. Dr. Fontaine watched from the door.

"Is she going to be okay?" The doctor asked the ME. Maura nodded and got up after leaving a kiss on Jane's cheek. She turned out the lights except for a small lamp near the door. Maura opened a window in the room slightly allowing the sound of the ocean waves and the salty breeze to flow inside. She made one last check of Jane before leaving the room. Dr. Fontaine, Aine, and Maura talked for several hours. Aine soon excused himself and headed home. Dr. Fontaine sat and listened to Maura as the doctor spoke. She was happy to hear all that the Jane and Maura had worked out together.

"It would seem things are getting better. I really don't think you need me here anymore Maura. You can set up appointments when you return to Boston on a weekly basis to continue working on several things, but overall I think the danger is passed." Dr. Fontaine stated confidently. Maura pondered this for a while.

"There is one thing. Jane's mother is due here this weekend. Jane's parents divorced when Jane was recouping from her self- inflicted gunshot wound. Jane had some problems accepting the divorce. She hasn't spoken to her father since the divorce. Right before we left her mother had a major argument with Jane. Basically, called all of Jane's major life choices into question I know it hurt Jane deeply. Angela is coming up this weekend with Frankie and Tommy to enjoy a couple of days. I'm worried that with Jane recouping from this latest adventure and being trapped inside in bed something bad is going to happen. I just have this gut feeling she is going to need you." Maura said trying to convey to Dr. Fontaine her concern. Dr. Fontaine quietly thought for a while and watched the woman before her.

"Tell me about the argument." Dr. Fontaine asked. Maura explained what happened and what was said. Dr. Fontaine nodded a half hour later seeing what Maura meant. She walked over to the coffee pot pouring another cup. "Do you know where Jane's father is now?" Maura shook her head and stopped suddenly. She got this inward look on her face as she mulled over something that was said to her.

"But I think Tommy Rizzoli her brother does. In fact, I think he may be seeing him regularly." Maura said thinking about Tommy's conversations with her in the past.

"Alright, I'll stay a little longer. I am actually enjoying the time off technically. I have already finished two journal articles and finished a couple chapters to my case studies book on schizophrenia. I just don't want to get in the way of your continued healing. You were more concerned about Jane being a danger to herself. The time for that has passed. She needs to talk with you now, but you're correct about Angela. I think we might need to persuade mom she needs to see a psychologist for a while. All right, I will bid you good night then. I'll talk to Jane in the morning as it seems the patient is a captive audience for a few days." Maura smiled at this and chuckled.

"Good night Dr. Fontaine. Thank you for all you have done." Maura saw the doctor out. She then locked up the doors, cleaned the kitchen, and turned off the lights as she headed to the bedroom. Maur stood in the doorway for a long time just watching Jane. The moonlight cast a comforting glow across her lover as she lay in the bed. It sent her back to the night Jane ravished her in the surf. Maura smiled tucking away that memory into the space in her heart that she kept those special moments in her life. She thought about those special moments examining each and every one. She was shocked to discover that Jane had provided more than half of them in the short while they knew each other. Maura shook herself from her reverie and changed into her pajama's. The doctor slid under the covers cuddling into Jane. The detective shifted in her sleep a little wrapping an arm around the doctor. Maura gently ran her fingers over Jane's face and kissed her softly on the lips. She then placed her ear over Jane's heart listening to the steady beat letting it sing her to sleep.


	42. Chapter 42

**Glazed Feelings**

**Part 42**

**Rizzoli and Isles is the property of TNT and Tess Gerritson. I am honored that you all are enjoying the story. I wanted to make it a real view in these two women's lives as they walk together. I hope I am providing a good story. I unfortunately, will be gone for a week for training. So, after I post this there will be no update until next weekend. I deeply apologize to my readers for this wait your humble bard, Deanlu.**

"This is Kitty Carlisle reporting from Boston's own Channel 7 news. Tonight we have breaking news on Boston's own Heroic Women police officer, Detective Jane Rizzoli. Late last night channel 7 news was given footage from a sister station in Martha's Vineyard of this desperate and heart wrenching rescue of Mayor Fineheart's son, Henry. Henry had been playing within the surf near his mother when a fast riptide pulled the boy under and out to sea. Officer Jane Rizzoli, who has been recuperating in Martha's Vineyard from injuries sustained in her kidnapping and assault by Eric Leonard, set aside concern for her own life and limb coming to the aid of Henry when she heard his mother yelling for help. Detective Rizzoli ran into the surf swimming to the rescue of young Henry. Here we have the film of this momentous rescue." Maura watched as the film rolled showing young Henry laying on Jane's chest as she performed rescue breathing. She watched as Henry and then Jane was plucked from the ocean. While the camera man focused on Henry momentarily, he then turned his lens on Detective Rizzoli who was watching the onboard EMT's . Jane's lips and face were tinged blue. Blankets were being wrapped around her. The film continued to roll showing the return to shore. "There you have it folks. We have been assured by Martha's Vineyard EMT's that Detective Rizzoli is well and will return to Boston after her recovery."

"Kitty, has there been any comment from the Boston police department about Detective Rizzoli's rescue of this little boy?" Desk anchor Arlen Jacobs asked the reporter.

"Yes, Arlen, Lieutenant Cavanaugh of Boston Homicide stated that Detective Rizzoli has always been a fearless and honorable officer of the law whom places other's needs ahead of her own. Officer Rizzoli is a tireless and persistent fighter for justice. Boston Homicide would expect no less from one of its own and as always is proud to call Detective Rizzoli theirs!" Kitty read. "Arlen, they are pretty proud of Detective Rizzoli. We had a chance to speak briefly with Detective Rizzoli's brother Tommy. The news channel switched to a taped video. Maura could tell they caught Tommy expectantly as he was walking dogs.

"Mr. Rizzoli do you have a comment about your sister Jane's rescue of the young boy in Martha's Vineyard?" Kitty was questioning Tommy. Tommy stopped and turned toward Ms. Carlisle.

"It was no less than what Jane always does for those in need." Tommy said as he tried to escape the reporter. Kitty was persistent though. "She helped you last year didn't she when you were falsely accused by the FBI of bank robbery." Tommy stopped and sighed as his shoulders deflated somewhat.

"Yes, Jane followed the leads. Her work was double checked by the FBI and Boston Homicide so there could be no doubt." Tommy said firmly.

"This is because you have a previous conviction and it could have been seen as a conflict of interest. Is this not correct Mr. Rizzoli?" Kitty badgered Tommy. Maura could tell Tommy was becoming fed up with the reporter. He leaned over petting one of the dogs that was a little antsy. Tommy then stood up and looked Kitty Carlisle right in the eye.

"My sister has always fought for truth and justice. She believes that those responsible for crime pay for the crime. I back her a hundred percent on that. She cares for the hurt and pain the victims have suffered. I'm damn proud of my sister Ms. Carlisle. Can you say the same for yourself?" With that Tommy Rizzoli turned and walked away. Maura smiled and did a fist pump.

"Way to go Tommy. Sock it to her." Maura said knowing Jane would have been proud of her brother.

"As you can see Arlen, Rizzoli's family is staunch defenders of her." Kitty said her face showing she was somewhat unhappy with the last part being there. Arlen was smirking somewhat when the camera panned back to him.

"This is what we have come to expect from Detective Rizzoli's family. Thank you Kitty Carlisle." Arlen turned from Kitty as the camera focused in on him. "Detective Rizzoli know that all of Boston waits for your return to work, thank you for your sacrifices for this citizenry. Now in other news…" Maura shut the channel off and looked toward the bedroom where Jane was sleeping. Only Jane wasn't sleeping, but standing in the doorway to the living room grimacing.

"What are you doing up? You are to be in bed." Maura rose quickly walking over to Jane. Jane looked at Maura.

"I thought I would use my Superhero strength to see what you were up too!" Jane smirked through the grimace. Maura kissed her softly. "I need a different view. Beds are for sleep and loving, not painfully reassessing my career choice while healing." Maura shook her head helping Jane to the couch.

"You stay right here. Do not move." Maura warned after getting Jane as comfortable as possible. Jane smirked again as she watched the sexy doctor walk to the bedroom. Maura grabbed several pillows and a light throw that was Jane's Nana's. Once back in the living room she used the pillows to make Jane more comfortable. She covered Jane up and lay down next to her. The nice thing about the couch in the beach house was it was wide enough to accommodate both ladies and still have room left over.

"I'm proud of Tommy. He did a good job fighting off Kitty's attack. I need to call him later today and make sure he comes up with mom and Frankie. So Kitty Carlisle changed her hairstyle again I see." Jane said casually as she let her hand caress Maura while she held her close. Maura pushed up on her arm.

"Seriously, you noticed her hairstyle?" Maura said looking at her lover. Jane smiled and nodded.

"She also changed her lipstick to a merlot color from that blaze red she usually wears." Maura was flummoxed as to why Jane would notice that. "Did you see the ring on her right hand too? She has a new love interest. It seems to have calmed her down some." Jane smirked as Maura continued to look at her. Jane knew she had thrown the doctor for a loop.

"Why are you sure the color of her lipstick says she has a love interest?" Maura asked curious as to why this was important.

"Kitty wears a bright red when she is out of relationship. I noticed it one time when she was at a scene. She hit on me. Shortly after I noticed she changed the color. When I flirted with her, she rebuffed me. I just added one and one and got two." Jane said gazing at Maura while she ignored the rising pain of her fractures.

"Why is that so important?" Maura asked as watched Jane's face to see if she was being teased. She wasn't and now Maura wanted to know why this was so important. "Jane, did…" Maura didn't know how to phrase this without causing an argument. "Did you have a fling with Kitty Carlisle?" Jane opened her eyes and looked up at Maura.

"You think because I noticed her hairstyle, lipstick, and the ring that I had a fling with her?" Jane was slightly shocked by Maura's question. Then she started chuckling and laughed until the pain hit her. She tried to catch her breath, but the pain engulfed her in its tight grip. She felt cold ice packs being placed next to the ribs.

"Jane, can you hear me? I need you to open your mouth and take these now." Maura said rather loudly. Jane opened her mouth and swallowed the two pills. She then took water behind them. She was quiet for a long time as she waited for the pain to ebb. She felt Maura take a seat next to her. Maura's hands gently soothed and assuaged Jane until finally her eyes opened. She smiled at Maura as the doctor leaned closer.

"No, I did not have a fling with her. I have always noticed these small things Maura. I was trained to notice things." Jane wondered if she should continue with what she was about to say. She decided it was time to let Maura know she knew one of her secrets. "Like when you studied and tried to get your parents attention with good grades, proper behavior, and correct social standings. You chose to go to BCU for pathology, a career chosen to hide yourself so as not to be hurt." Jane felt Maura's breathing hitch as her face attempted to deny the truth Jane was speaking. "When Ian was here you changed your perfume and makeup base to make him happy. You changed it back when he left." Jane said softly.

"Jane stop." Maura stated worried where this was headed.

"Then, when you were dating Dr. Slucky I noticed you acted more demurely and submissive in public when you were with him. I wondered why Maura would act that way when it's not her. Then he made a fatal mistake he called you a mere pathologist." Jane said her voice raising a little to bring home the emphasis.

"Jane you don't know what you're talking about. You need to rest." Maura protested.

"You changed your car after we had an argument on the wealth factor to a Prius from the Jaguar. You also started trying more with me going out to the Dirty Robber, trying cheese fries with chili, burgers." Maura was beginning to feel slightly uncomfortable. She thought the changes had gone unnoticed. Jane looked directly into Maura's eyes not letting her hide. She ran her hand along the doctor's cheek and jaw. "At first I asked myself why? Why would an intelligent, vibrant, and beautiful woman change herself for every man she met? Why would she change for me? Unless… she was hoping she would be accepted by them…" Maura started to pull away from Jane.

"Jane, stop please." Maura said as Jane used the strength of her body and the pain pills she had ingested to hold Maura in place. Maura looked away as Jane continued.

"…Unless she wanted to be loved and cared for by someone." Jane said as she reached up turning Maura's face toward her. "You didn't have to change for me Maura. You don't have to change. I love you just the way you are my love. I love the intelligent woman who is smarter than me, but confused when we are in social settings. I love when you Google mouth, but can't get pop culture sayings." Jane said softly as she watched Maura's tears fall. "I may have a small problem with your wealth Maur, but I would never deny you the pleasure it brings you, the assurance. You don't have to change for me Maur. I love you just as you are. Don't let your quirky, intelligent, and beautiful side disappear. I accept you for who you are love." Jane said softly. "If you change everything you are Maura then the women I am in love with disappears. Then we won't fit. I am going to make sure you understand and know deeply Maura that you don't have to change to be accepted. I love you." Maura buried her head into Jane's chest crying. Jane grimaced quietly, but was not about to make her love move. Jane let her cry hoping this finally excised some things Maura had continued to try and hide.

"How long?" Maura mumbled into Jane's chest. "How long have you known?" Maura asked as she turned her head sideways to look at Jane.

"Some of it came after you talked to Hoyt. I had been noting things in my mind for a while. When you talked about the benign neglect a lot of things clicked into place. You never needed to do those things Maur. People should accept you just the way you are." Maura rose quickly startling Jane as anger flushed her features.

"So easy for you to say Jane you fit right in to almost every social situation. You never had to smile when people bullied you. You never had to thank them when they treated you badly." Maura yelled at Jane. Jane knew she hit a raw spot. She was determined to see Maura through it even though she wasn't quite well. "I just wanted someone to accept me for who I was. Is that too much to ask Jane? When they couldn't I found it was easier to change and hide certain aspects of myself." Maura turned away wrapping her arms around herself. "Children can be so cruel Jane. They know how to hurt you. They don't stand up for their friends unless they're special or secure in who they are. Like you." Jane rose shoving aside the blanket and standing. She took a minute to level her breathing and stepped forward wrapping Maura in her arms.

"Yeah, they can be Maur. We are not children anymore." Jane said as Maura wrenched free.

"You think adults are anymore kind Jane. You wouldn't even tell your friends about our relationship for months because you were afraid of being call 'dyke', 'butch', of tampons and other things done to you. Don't you sit there and lecture me about…" Jane kissed Maura. Not hard, but soft on her hand causing the medical examiner to stumble to a stop. Jane kissed her lips. Jane kissed her softly on each eye lid.

"I am not lecturing you. You're right; I embarrassed and hurt you the first few months of our relationship because I didn't know what I wanted. If I could love you Maura not because you were a woman, but because I wasn't sure if I could sustain a relationship or even if I was capable of loving someone. I was so afraid I would mess it up or something in the job would mess it up that I didn't see the hurt I was causing you. I'm sorry love. I didn't mean to make you feel like those others did. I will try not to ever make that happen again." Maura stopped Jane noticing for the first time they were standing and Jane had to be in pain.

"You never have Jane. Please lay down, please. "Maura said softly hoping Jane would agree. This was a stupid discussion to have while Jane's body mended itself slowly. Jane didn't move.

"People deserve to see you for who you are Maura Isles. They deserve to see why I have fallen for the best woman on this planet. Don't confine yourself to other people's expectations. I would never want to see you caged in like that. You know what I love about the quiet times with you?" Jane asked Maura making the doctor stop trying to get the detective seated.

"No, what?" Maura asked curiously now.

"I love seeing the real you, Maura, the woman, whose passion for pathology and life drives her. I watch as you read the latest journal or article. I love how you describe the processes even when I don't understand it all because I know it's your passion. I love watching you take bubble baths. Did you know it is an extremely sensual experience?" This caused Maura to blush a little as Jane wove her love through the painful revelations. Jane moved closer so their breath mixed as she spoke in a lower tone and Maura listened breathing out. "I don't even have to be in the bathtub with you. Just the thought of you lying in the tub relaxing, drinking your glass of wine brings joy to my heart because you're doing it for yourself. You love it and it's who you are." Jane brought their bodies closer now weaving her magic into Maura's damaged soul. "Remember when we went to see La Boheme?" Jane asked Maura their lips barely a breath apart. Maura nodded never letting her eyes leave the deep brown chocolate pools that were Jane's. "I could see the real women come forth from you. You felt the words so deeply in each song. Do you know I never watched the Opera that night?" Jane asked Maura. Maura shook her head gently. "I didn't. I watched you Maura. I watched you feel each valley and mountain in the music. I watched you rise to heavenly heights that night. I was so mesmerized by your enjoyment of the opera that I fell in love with you all over again." Jane said as their lips met in a passionate exchanged. When they parted for air Maura spoke.

"You always wonder why I fell in love with you or how I could love you. You just proved why again Jane. It's just me and my stupid fears." Maura said as Jane smiled kissing the tip of Maura's nose. "Now please lie down. I can feel you shaking. I don't want another day at the hospital." Jane acquiesced lying down getting comfortable again and closing her eyes as the medication pulled her under. Jane wouldn't let Maura's hand go.

"Your fears are not stupid. We will work on them though." Jane said as Maura watched the medication finally pull Jane completely under.

"You're too wise for your own good sometimes Jane." Maura kissed her forehead and cuddled up next to her. God, she had been stupid thinking Jane had seen nothing. Jane was trained detective, but even more she was more observant than most. It was the reason for her high closure on cases. Maura sighed breathing in Jane's scent. She felt better knowing Jane knew, but a little unbalanced that Jane had kept it a secret for so long. Life was about compromises and acceptance. Jane had taught her that more than anyone. So she would accept for now.


	43. Chapter 43

**Glazed Feelings**

**Part 43**

**Rizzoli and Isles are the property of TNT and Tess Gerritson. I am just borrowing them for a little family chaos at least in this chapter. I hope you all are enjoying this ride. I am thinking there will be a few more chapters with an epilogue. Enjoy the read **

Maura watched through the patio doors as Jane finished speaking with Dr. Fontaine. There were tears in her lover's eyes. Maura knew the discussion centered on Angela and the reaction she had before they left for Martha's Vineyard, but she hoped there had been discussion about how Angela attempted to control Jane's life. Jane's resentment at Angela's overbearing interference in her life caused a great deal of friction in the detective's life. Maura tossed the Salad and set it on the table. She then pulled the garlic and lemon shrimp skewers from the oven. A nice rice pilaf was plated and two skewers placed on the plates. The doctor wiped her hands on a towel. Maura moved to the door to call them when she heard Jane's voice.

"It's just seems I never fit ma's mold. She wanted the girl who wore dresses, had pigtails, played with dolls, and hated getting dirty. We fight more than we talk together. I guess I'm just tired of her having to have a say in everything that I do. I mean I know families do that, but most families mom's don't barge into their apartment to clean it and catch you making out with your date. Ma, has always been like that." Jane said looking over at Dr. Fontaine who was nodding. They had been talking for the better part of two hours as Jane spoke about family. " Í want a normal adult relationship with my mom where I can ask for her help or she inquires if there is something wrong, but doesn't harp."

"I think Jane that what you need to do when your mother comes here this weekend is to establish some basic and simple boundaries with her. The first should be Maura and your house." Dr. Fontaine said casually.

"Maura and I don't have a house together yet. We have our own places." Jane said softly looking back up at the doctor. Maura hid in the fall of the curtain just inside the door area.

"Is that something you want Jane? " Dr. Fontaine asked leaning forward. Jane ran her right hand through her hair.

"Just before the incident in the warehouse I had meant to ask Maura if we could start looking for a place. Some place that mixed both of our tastes. I figured we were strong enough to take that step together especially since I had already asked her to marry me." Jane's voice trembled as memories of the events in the warehouse flooded her mind. "Afterwards, I kept trying to figure out how I had judged her love so wrong? How I could have missed … You know I am a trained detective." Dr. Fontaine nodded letting Jane continue. "I was so lost after…I put so much blame on her shoulders when I forgot that we were both to blame and she was going through the cycles of grief. Her mother had been injured and someone was trying to kill her. Then Patty was shot by her best friend…maybe…" Jane leaned back into the chair as the ache in her ribs became more pronounced as her tension level rose. She closed her eyes shutting out the world for a moment. "Maybe I'm not as good a detective as I thought or maybe I am not relationship material," Jane said softly. Dr. Fontaine was about to speak when she saw Maura stepped out.

"Hey, dinner is ready. Your mom, Tommy, and Frankie will be arriving tomorrow afternoon. Dr. Fontaine I have the plates ready. Can you give me a moment with Jane?" Maura asked Dr. Fontaine. The Doctor smiled thinking this was just what the doctor ordered.

"My pleasure Ms. Isles see you both inside." Fontaine walked inside to her meal while Maura sat next to Jane.

"Jane, open your eyes. I know you're trying to avoid me." Jane sighed and looked up at Maura. Maura's face reflected back love and compassion along with a little concern.

"Dinners ready so let's go eat." Jane said trying to escape from Maura, but it did her no good. The medical examiner wouldn't let her budge. Jane leaned back deflated that she wouldn't escape.

"You need to stop and listen to yourself, especially the things you keep telling me about believing in yourself, trusting yourself, and loving the person you are Jane." Jane nodded sitting forward as Maura took her hands. "You're an amazing woman with unique abilities and needs. I believe we complement each other Jane. I believe I was made for you." Maura knelt on the deck in front of Jane placing Jane's hand over her heart. "I know you were made for me. I know I make you complete Jane. You can try to hide it because you're scared and hurt inside, but you belong to me as I to you. You're a good detective. Sometimes when we are in the middle of the whirlwind of emotion in our lives we can't see what we should. It happens' Jane. We have to accept that and move forward in our relationship one of which I am very proud of even with the bad points. If we didn't have the bad points we would never grow and we would never deepen what we have. It would always be a surface relationship a flight of fancy." Maura said seriously. Jane let out a shaky breath and nodded. "Do you want us to succeed Jane? Are you willing to work for our happiness and love? Do you want me?" Maura asked with some trepidation of what the detective's answer would be in the end.

"Don't you know by now Maura? I would never do the things I have done for anyone else. I fought Hoyt off for you, to make sure you would be safe. I would have died in that prison hospital if you hadn't been with me. I fought death itself to come back to you when Eric and Peter tried to kill me. I didn't shirk my responsibility from you even when you distanced yourself when I shot Doyle. I made sure you were okay, protected, and loved. So yes, I want us to succeed, to be happy and loved. I want and need you Maura more desperately than the air I breathe," Jane said leaning her head forward to touch Maura's smiling face. "Hell, you're the only one who has ever gotten me to go to a shrink and accept these feelings I have inside. You're the only person I have ever wanted to propose to and did propose too. I'm just tired." Jane said softly attempting to deflect her beautiful lover. Maura shook her head pulling Jane closer.

"No deflecting Jane. I think I taught that to you. I wish I had never done that. We have hidden so many things from each other for sake of fear and love that we have arrived here at this one place and time." Maura looked into Jane's eyes to see the confirmation in her lovers eyes. "I know there are times we will have to wait and tell the truth to each other, but no more lying okay? When it's us, alone, we need to be honest with each other even if it hurts the other, otherwise the alternative is this relationship ripping apart on us. Agreed?" Maura asked waiting on Jane's answer. Jane pulled away looking at her girlfriend for a while.

"All right, but you will have to bear with me. I have never trusted someone as much as I do you. For that reason I sometimes hold back what I should say." Jane said softly. Maura nodded hugging her fiancée.

"I accept that. Now come on before Dr. Fontaine eats all our lunch." Maura said helping Jane rise. She stopped the Italian woman for a second looking at her with all her love. "Don't worry about your mother; we will tackle the problem together." Jane hugged Maura a moment and then walked inside to have lunch. The rest of the day preceded in much the same manner. Jane took a two hour nap while Maura read the latest forensic journal articles. Afterwards, Dr. Fontaine talked with Jane for several hours working out several small, but key issues. Jane and Maura bedded down that night with the imminent arrival of the family and the complications that would bring for the couple.

Friday dawned early with storm clouds on the horizon. Thunder rumbled across the sky as lightning crackled creating spidery webs within the clouds. Dr. Fontaine had gone to town to do some shopping. Maura was sleeping in late after talking with Jane late into the morning. Jane was sitting in front of the fireplace drinking coffee contemplating the coming day. Her family was due at the beach house in the next few hours. She knew she would have to talk to her mother about the argument they had before they left. She hoped within her heart that her mother had misspoke and really didn't want her to marry a man, but Jane had her doubts. She knew Frankie and Tommy wouldn't be an issue to the relationship other than the normal in-law drama, no it was her mother she was deeply concerned and worried about. She had already lost one parent, her father, when he divorced her mother. Jane had been willing to give him a chance after that until he had asked for the annulment. Jane drew the line there. If her father could turn his back on her mother that was one thing, but to want to say the whole relationship never existed and he had no children…no, Jane could not forgive that. Not for some two-bit floosy who still had her training diapers.

"Hey, can I join you?" Maura asked softly kissing Jane below the ear. Jane smiled at her lover's voice as she was brought back to the present. Maura sat down on the couch taking a sip of her coffee watching her lovers deep brown eyes. Jane had more color today. The detective wasn't hunched over from the pain either like last night. She also seemed a tad bit fuzzy suggesting she had taken her meds for change without being badgered about it.

"You can always join me my love. Do feel more rested?" Jane asked as she noticed the worry lines and dark circles under Maura's eyes had disappeared completely. Now the doctor's skin had taken on a healthy glow.

"Yeah, the time here is helping a lot of things heal I didn't know were effecting my job and life." Maura said smiling. Jane nodded in agreement with her lover.

"So everything ready for mom and the boys?" Jane asked Maura. The doctor nodded knowing is galled Jane not being able to help with the preparations. The detective was on strict orders of no physical exertion. Maura had already given in to allowing Jane movement from the bedroom to the living room and other places. The doctor was not about to give in on the other fronts though.

"Yes, just a little over an hour and a half left till they arrive." Maura said seeing the tension rise in Jane's body. "It will be okay. We are doing this together love." Maura said as she reached out and took Jane's hand. Jane nodded letting the tension go for a while and focusing on another concern.

"So, did you talk with Doctor Reynolds about my physical therapy?" Jane asked hiding herself behind the coffee cup and dipping her head enough to hide a majority of her face. Maura sighed softly and placed her coffee cup down. She knew that Jane was chomping at the bit to resume her normal physical activities now that she had a huge amount of the emotional baggage she carried dealt with from her session with Dr. Fontaine. Maura reached forward taking Jane's cup and setting it off to the side. She then grabbed her loves chin and pushed her hair out of the way.

"Please, stop being ashamed of wanting to return to work." Maura said when Jane stopped her.

"No, I…I don't want to return to work as much as I want to feel strong again. I mean I feel stronger inside emotionally and mentally, but I need the physical strength to balance it all. I need…" Jane stopped realizing it was one of her fears coming forward. Maura scrutinized Jane closely.

"What do you need?" She asked Jane softly treading carefully as to not scare the detective. Jane looked up plaintively.

"I need…needtofeelIcanprotectyou." Jane said in a rush of words. Maura sighed and leaned forward giving a kiss of absolution to the detective.

"You have always protected me. Stop believing that you can't or haven't. You will regain your strength Jane. Dr. Reynolds will start you on the incentive spirometer tonight. I have it here. We need to get your breathing back to normal. You're breathing shallower and that needs to change to deeper breaths to keep pneumonia away. You will start light exercise tomorrow. These will consist of short walks building into longer ones." Jane rolled her eyes and looked away. Maura grabbed her chin once again. "You are going to follow these instructions Jane. You may think what I have told you is easy, but it is not. You are recovering from a major trauma to your body. I know when you take deep breathes you feel pain, sometimes excruciating pain." Jane's eyes dropped in shame.

"Sorry, I just feel useless." Jane said softly. Maura laughed out loud at Jane's statement. Jane's head pulled back up as Maura fired back.

"Says the woman who dove into the ocean, swam under water, grabbed a young boy, gave him mouth to mouth rescue breathing on top of her body until help could arrive. What is it going to take to get you to understand there is no one else who could have done that Jane in your condition?" Maura went to rise as Jane caught her arm and pulled her down.

"Sorry, I tend to forget everyone thinks what I do is amazing. Maura for me it's just hard work, that's all." Jane said clearly judging the astonishment on Maura's face as shock.

"Jane, no one else would have done what you did for that boy in your condition. No one would have held on like you did after Eric attack you. No one would have returned to work and claimed their rightful place among the detectives like you did after Hoyt attacked you. You're special Jane one in a million. You captured my heart. Not an easy task considering how well I guard it." Jane smiled and shook her head.

"You just keep telling me those things Doctor Isles. I will try and believe them. Now how about some breakfast before ma and the boys arrive," Jane said as she kissed Maura and headed into the kitchen.


	44. Chapter 44

**Glazed Feelings**

**Part 44**

**Rizzoli and Isles is the property of TNT and Tess Gerritson. **

"Come on Jane, it's only your mother. You can do this. There is nothing to be afraid of from her. You can be strong. " Jane said looking at herself in the mirror. "Only Maura gets to see this side. Time to become Jane again, at least the Jane everyone knows." Jane moved out of the bathroom. After breakfast, Jane and Maura had laid down for a nap. Now an hour later, the family had arrived. Maura had gone to answer the door while Jane pulled herself together.

"Where's my daughter?" Angela Rizzoli shouted as she came through the door. Jane smiled knowing only her mom and family could be so loud. She heard the quieter murmurings from Maura, and then a squeal as one of the boys grabbed the medical examiner she assumed.

"Tommy, put me down." Jane heard the medical examiner's raised voice. Jane made her way out to the living room area. Frankie spotted her first as he came to give her a gentle hug.

"Hey Sis, how are you feeling?" He asked with a concerned face. Jane smiled at him squeezing his shoulder.

"Better, a lot better. Maura and Dr. Fontaine have been taking good care of me." Jane said as Frankie watched her looking for something. He smiled and hugged her again.

"Good, we will talk later more," he whispered in her ear. Tommy took his place as Frankie went to hug Maura. Angela was already in the kitchen.

"Hey. Is it okay to hug you?" Tommy asked as he smiled at his sister. Jane nodded and he hugged her gently. "I had a long talk with mom. I think she will be more amendable," he whispered to his sister. Jane smiled into Tommy's shoulder. She actually relaxed there for a while making Tommy smile. He always wanted to look out for Jane. Right at this moment he felt like he was doing that for her. "Come on, you're starting to shake and need to sit down. He helped her over to the couch." Angela watched for a moment from the kitchen as a tear fell down her cheek. She hated seeing Jane injured weak in nature. Her daughter was strong, could kick butt, and take names after. She just didn't understand why she had to fall in love with Maura? Why she had to be a police officer? It wasn't that Angela didn't love Maura, God she adored the women. She had made Jane do things Angela could never get her to do. It was just that she didn't want the problems for Jane they would face. Hell, she didn't even care about the church. It was obvious to her over the last several years the church couldn't get itself together and protect its parishioners any better than the parishioners could protect themselves. So in the end who was the church to say Maura and Jane's love was wrong? Who was Angela to say it was wrong? Angela took a deep breath and walked over to the couch.

"How are you doing? You're listening to Maura, right? Have you taken your meds?" Angela's barrage of questions was a shield for her underlying fears for her daughter. Jane sighed and smiled.

"I'm fine. Yes, I'm listening to Maura. Yes, I have taken my meds today." Jane said as she answered her mother. Angela hugged her daughter gently. Jane did look a little better, but she was definitely not up to par yet. Suddenly, something occurred to Angela. "What do you mean you have taken your meds today?" Angela asked Jane. The detective turned away from her mother only to be caught in the glare of Maura's eyes.

"Jane! You promised me you would take your meds." Maura began as she walked over to the area they kept the medication. Jane sighed; well she had gone an extra three hours without it so she definitely was doing better.

"Jane Clementine Rizzoli! I swear you have to be watched twenty four hours a day. I am going to get lunch going for us. You need an Italian meal to fortify you. Now you do as Maura says while I cook something for you to eat." Angela said getting up to be replaced by Maura. Jane watched her mother's retreat to the kitchen always the safe place where the elder Rizzoli could hide and be in control.

"Tommy, Frankie go ahead and take your bags out to the small cottage next door. You two will stay there this weekend. Frankie your mom's bags can go down the hall to the door on the left. She has the spare room here." Maura said as the boys scrambled to obey the doctors directions. "When are Korsak and Frost to be arriving?" Maura asked Angela.

"They should arrive soon. They were following us most of the way until Korsak saw this interesting bait shop and wanted to stop. Ummm, Maura can I speak with you a second?" Angela asked from the kitchen. She already had several ingredients pulled out and several pots on the stove. Maura kissed Jane after she took her meds. Jane knew she would be asleep in no time now. Something she had been trying to avoid.

"Behave, I will be right back." Maura whispered. Jane kissed Maura back and nodded. The detective made herself comfortable and closed her eyes. She listened to the gentle drone of her mother's and Maura's voices. "What can I do for you?" Maura asked Angela.

"Could you chop the onions and the garlic for me?" Maura nodded as the two women settled into a normal rhythm. Maura could see the boys had finished with the luggage and were now checking out the beach. "Maura, Korsak will be staying in my room." Maura almost chopped the tip of her finger off. She had figured this would happen soon. Korsak had been quietly dating Jane's mother for months now. Jane had ignored all the warning signs because she was wrapped up in her own worries. "I need to tell Janie. I don't want this to come between her and Korsak." Maura finished chopping the onions and garlic placing them in the nearby bowls until they were needed.

"How about you let me tell her?" Maura said softly as she rinsed her hand in the sink and wiped them on a towel. Angela shook her head.

"No, it's my job. I know I have hurt her already with the argument before we left. That wasn't my intention. Somehow things came out wrong and all messed up." Angela turned now wiping her hands on a towel from her waist. "I don't begrudge you and Jane your relationship. I don't. I just…"

"It's not what you envisioned for her." Maura said softly. Angela shook her head no as a few tears came to her eyes.

"I don't understand how she can love a woman and not a man. Janie always seemed to want to be with the boys. I just…it's hard to wrap my mind around. I'm sorry." Angela turned away for a moment.

"Are you mad at me for loving Jane the way I do?" Maura asked hoping the answer was no, needing the answer to be no. She loved Angela deeply. The woman had provided the missing component her mother never could give her until recently.

"No, no…please don't mistake what I am trying to say. I love that you love my Janie. I just wanted something different for her…something very different." Angela said as she focused on the shattering of that dream. Maura stepped forward and hugged her future mother-in-law. "Oh, what's come over me? Let's get dinner ready. Would you watch this while I go talk to Janie?" Maura nodded stirring the Italian sausage in the pan and checking the other dishes Angela had started. Maura glanced out toward the living room as Angela sat down next to Jane on the edge of the couch. She prayed this went well.

"Janie? You awake?" Angela called as she stepped into the living room. Jane smiled and rolled over.

"Just barely ma, the meds they have given me really knock me for a loop." Jane said as her eyes fluttered open. "What do you need?" Jane couldn't even muster the fear for the conversation the meds had her so relaxed.

"I need to tell you…Korsak and I are dating." Angela said as Jane smiled.

"That's nice ma." Jane said as her fuzzy mind didn't add two and two together.

"We will be in the same room while we are here too." Angela said rather surprised at the reaction.

"Okay, saves space." Jane's eyes drifted shut even as her mind shut down. Angela shook her head. She got up and walked into the kitchen with a befuddled look. Maura looked up from where she was stirring the pasta. Maura set the spoon down on the spoon rest.

"So how did she take it? Angela?" Maura asked walking over to the woman and placing a hand on her shoulder. "What did she say?"

"That was nice and it saved space." Maura sighed and shook her head. It had to be the meds.

"Is she asleep now?" Maura asked softly. Angela nodded. "It's the meds. They make her fuzzy. There may be a delayed reaction when she wakes." Angela nodded and went back to work. Maura watched Jane's mom work for a while. She knew there was more she wanted to talk about so she opened herself as the target to save Jane some of the inquisition later.

"You want to say something, what is it?" Maura asked watching the Italian matron cook with assurity recipe's that had been made a hundred times, maybe even a thousand times before. Maura pulled a bottle of wine from below the counter where the wine was stored in a special unit. She uncorked it and poured two glasses waiting for Angela to fire the first salvo.

"How can you stand being known as a Lesbian?" Angela stated softly with just a slight bit of acidity to her voice. Maura took a sip of her wine thinking on how she should answer this statement.

"Technically Jane and I would be described as bisexuals. We have had relationships with both sexes. I hate labels; therefore I feel I am not confined to any one label. I don't look at myself as a Lesbian. I look at myself as a woman in love with a person who loves her back for who she is not what society wants them to be." Angela grimaced at Maura's statement as the doctor handed her the glass of wine. "Why should I restrain myself to who loves me by sex? I have been with many men Angela; none have ever given me what your daughter gives to me. She fulfills those deep painfully empty holes that no one else thought to look at and examine. She has spent many a night just talking with me, holding my hand, holding me as I cried out the pain of my past." Maura took another sip as Angela listened. "Never once have I had to question her love, except when the shooting took place and I became emotionally confused. Even then, Jane never shut herself off to me though I hurt her deeply. I have never had a friend or loved someone like Jane." Maura took another drink of her wine trying to drown the guilt she still felt inside. "What other's think of us is their problem. Jane and I have accepted and moved past the need for approval from others. The only ones that need to approve of us are each other." Maura said feeling stronger for saying it aloud. She poured herself another glass of wine and began slicing the bread. She would make the butter and garlic spread in a second.

"How do you deal with people at work? I know Jane use to hide how much it hurt her when they called her a dyke. What about now?" Angela asked as she stirred the simmering sauce. She moved to drain the fresh pasta. Maura sighed as she smeared the bread with the butter mixture.

"It still bothers her." Maura began as Angela interrupted her.

"See, how can you subject her to that Maura? How can you let her take on that hurt when she could easily avoid it by dating a man?" Angela said a little louder than she had planned. Maura went to answer when she was cut off unceremoniously by Jane's gentle burr.

"She doesn't subject me to anything. I asked her to love me. I asked her to marry me. I asked her to walk with me through this life where no one else wanted me except for a piece of ass. I don't need any man or woman to complete me. I only need Maura. If that comes with people hating me because the person I love is the same sex then so be it." Jane slid into the kitchen and behind Maura gathering her into her arms. She knew Maura could hold her own, but she didn't have too. "I personally think that most of the people we know don't have room to talk since they seem to be so unhappy about their relationships. I constantly hear them complaining about their wives and husbands and I have to ask myself why should it matter if I marry Maura or date her. There isn't a week that goes by that we don't hear about troubled marriages at BPD ma that are headed toward divorce so why should it matter if I love Maura?" Jane said with a bone deep certainty she had never felt until now.

"Jane, I just want you to be happy. I don't want you to have to deal with all the problems being gay means. People are so cruel." Angela said angrily.

"Yes, they are ma family are the cruelest when they won't accept another's happiness in the family." Jane said taking a deep slice into the emotional pie that her mother had set before them. Maura squeezed Jane softly reassuring her. Angela gasped as having been laid bare before her daughter's accusation. "You have a choice ma. You can either accept Maura and I as we are and into your life or you can spend your days bitter and bemoaning the fact you have lost a daughter. It's your choice really, but know this I am marrying Maura, she is becoming my wife, and if you want to see your future grandchildren from us you will need to accept us as a couple. I won't let bitterness and hate hurt my family now or in the future." Jane said adamantly. Maura hugged Jane tighter feeling her shaking from the effort it was taking to stand up to her mother. Angela nodded and sighed.

"You're going to have to give me some time Jane to think about this all." Jane held the tears that threatened to fall from her eyes. "It's not that I don't love you both. It's just a lot to take in for now."

"All right, I can concede that Ma. Just so you know I don't mind you being with Korsak, though it makes things a little strange and weird. I know you need someone so you don't feel alone. I would never begrudge that to you." Jane said seriously. Then to take the tension down a step, "Just don't ever let me catch you two naked or in the throes of passion. There isn't enough brain bleach to fix those images ever." Angela and Maura burst out laughing as Jane smiled. Angela reached over hugging her daughter.

"I love you Janie. I hear you." Jane snickered and softly kissed her ma's head.


	45. Chapter 45

**Glazed Feelings**

**Part 45**

**Rizzoli and Isles are the property of TNT and Tess Gerritson. I am just borrowing them for some mild angst. I appreciate the feedback. I really need it right now. This is probably one of the hardest areas for me to delve into because I have some investment within these words. I believe we all fear being acknowledged and accepted in our lives. Many of us hide or deny who we are because it is safer than to be rejected by those at large. My community this last week was thrust into the national limelight with the double homicide of two women who were in a relationship for over 6 months. They were found shot to death in one of our parks. While evidence leads the investigators to say it had nothing to do with their sexual orientation it has caused the community to rally behind the families to stop hate. It has also caused this author many a sleepless night wondering about life lately. So enjoy the bumpy ride ladies and gentlemen if you are reading it is done with a purpose, your humble bard Deanlu.**

"Ha! Jane always tackles the suspect. Where are we in numbers Jane? I think you're at 16 tackles and I'm at 10 tackles. Jane's like a linebacker. I've seen her in hot pursuit push through a crowd with ease only to have the perp on the ground and cuffed before I can say the word police." Frost said laughing as Maura and the rest laughed and smiled. Dinner was a noisy affair with the Rizzoli's. Just add in Frost, Korsak, Dr. Fontaine, and then Jane's friend Aine McCalister who had been invited and it was uproarious. Aine had told one story after another of Jane in school which had everyone laughing including Jane's mother, though some had made her uncomfortable.

"Well you should have seen her kiss in high school! Man, she had more than one boy jealous." Aine said laughing. "…Including me." Tommy smirked knowing why immediately, it was the reason he had lost Shelby Grace to Jane. He was pretty sure of it. It was also the reason he didn't envy Jane with Maura, though he secretly loved Maura deeply. He would never tell Jane or Maura. His sister's happiness was important to him.

"What do you mean Aine?" Maura asked squeezing Jane's hand even as Angela listened curiously from where Korsak sat next to her holding her hand.

"Why Janie could have anyone and I mean anyone! Boys, girls they all flocked to her even though she was an outcast. Why you should have seen Shelby Grace kissing her behind the bleachers of the football field during her sophomore year you would have thought Jane invented passion!" Aine said chuckling as Angela winced not liking what she heard. She had always thought her daughter was straight. After all she had brought Joey Grant, Casey, and all these other boys home. Why didn't she know about the girls Janie had dated? Angela continued to listen even as Jane blushed from embarrassment.

"I knew it! I knew it Jane!" Tommy stood up throwing a piece of garlic bread at her which his sister deftly caught. "You told me you weren't dating her," her brother said smirking that he had finally found out.

"Hey, no throwing food at the table," Angela yelled at Tommy. Tommy sat down with an indefinable look that told Jane he would be talking with her later. He never resented Jane for who she dated. They had made a subtle pact though that there had to be six months in between of where neither were with the same person before dating them. It had worked well until Shelby Grace.

"I wasn't dating her. I had been cutting through the bleachers to get to the concession stand when Shelby cornered me and backed me into a steel bar. She told me she wanted to know what flavor of lip balm I used and proceeded to kiss me. I just let her know how truly luscious cherry lip balm was in the end." Jane said chuckling as Tommy smiled. He wasn't mad. He knew his sister was very careful with her heart.

"I wish I would have known that line. I might have been a little luckier in high school." Frankie said chuckling as Frost punched him on the shoulder. Maura growled a little under her breath. Jane kissed Maura on the cheek to reassure her and whispered something in her ear that caused the medical examiner to blush deep red. "Anyway, Shelby was just experimenting. She ended up marrying Greg Abbot in the end."

"Yeah, but she has never forgot that kiss Jane." Aine said smiling as he watched Jane squirm in her seat. "She was out here two summers ago and we ran into each other. She has three kids now. She couldn't be happier with Greg. She asked about you. I told her what I knew from the newspapers and such. She told me that she never forgot that kiss. I asked what it was like that made it so memorable." Aine's voice dropped off as he heard the words Shelby said to him. "She said it's like standing in the middle of a hurricane with the world out of control, wild around you, but you're in the center, the eye of the storm being held by someone who wants to consume your entire being and it feels like the safest place in the world with this gentle peace that just envelops you. It was like truly coming home. I will never forget that look in her eyes." Jane ducked her head in embarrassment and rose from the table. Her mother's cold stare was more than Jane could take at the moment. Aine's recalling of the memory was a good one for Jane and she didn't want it sullied by her mother's difficulty with who Jane was inside.

"Ahh, I need some fresh air." Jane walked out the doors of the patio and onto the beach wrapping her arms around her. Memories of the kiss with Shelby floated to the top. It was one of Jane's fondest memories until Maura had come along. She had never experienced a kiss like that before Shelby. It had always been a game to her to see if she could out do the guys in getting kisses. That night with Shelby had blown her out of the water. Jane smiled remembering she hadn't worn Cherry lip balm, it had been bubble gum. Shelby had worn cherry lip balm. Jane could just catch its scent and taste on her lips in memory. She was pulled from the memory by two hands gently wrapping around her, turning her, and pulling her head down into a slow, passionate kiss. Jane fell into Maura's lips as if they were the water for her thirst. Several minutes later she came back to awareness as they separated their warm breath mingling as hands caressed cheeks while foreheads rested together.

"I love you Jane. I know exactly what Shelby meant. You always make me feel that way. I feel so lucky to be loved by you Jane." Maura's sultry whispered words worked their way down into Jane's soul warming it, loving it, and removing the embarrassment of before from her. "Why did you run? Everything Aine said was lovely Jane. It shows the woman I love so amazingly."

"You weren't watching ma. She was not pleased with what she learned." Jane said as Maura kissed her on the cheek and pulled her further down the beach. Jane looked back to see Aine, Frankie, Frost, and Tommy lighting a bonfire, Dr. Fontaine sitting at the table inside saying something to Jane's mother, and Korsak sat right next to the elder Rizzoli nodding his head. "You know she has never said anything bad about our relationship Maura. I always believed she approved of it. I had no inkling she had all this pent up inside of her. What do I do?" Jane asked looking at her lover trying to find a solution. Maura pulled Jane down into the sand fitting the detective between her legs. She pulled Jane back to rest against her.

"There is nothing you can do love, but give it time and be available to talk. She has to work it out for herself." Maura said as she kissed Jane's head hugging her a little tighter. Jane listened to the motion of the waves, the sounds of laughter and popping wood from where her family was on the beach, and felt the strong beat of her fiancées heart. Jane just relaxed into Maura more resting in the reassurance of the beautiful woman. She heard footsteps in the sand and watched as Tommy sat down next to her and Maura. Maura went to get up, but Tommy stopped her.

'No, I didn't come over here to disturb you just to join you. I've missed you both a lot this last week." Tommy said handing Jane a cold beer and Maura a glass of wine he had brought over. Jane eyed the beer and peered back at Maura.

"One is okay, but no more. The medicine you're on is very strong." Maura said seriously as Jane nodded. Maura took a sip of her wine humming a little with satisfaction. Tommy smiled as Jane winked at him. "This is good Tommy. I didn't pull this for dinner. Where did you get it?" Tommy smiled that he had done well.

"I owed you for that rancid bottle I got you before. Jane helped me pick it out before everything fell apart. She said you like special bouquets. I know now which ones thanks to Jane." Tommy said even as Maura looked at Jane surprised.

"What? I listen to you." Jane said looking away and smiling that she had gotten one past Maur for a change.

"You're going to have to get used to it Maura. Jane is like that. She remembers things about those she cares about birthdays, favorite colors, presents they'd like, and stuff like that. I bet she could even tell you when your first date was and what happened still." Tommy said as he fondly remembered every card, letter, and present he had received from Jane while he was locked up.

"It was in the morgue, during the Sanderson case. We were supposed to go out to dinner together, but the mayor wouldn't let you off the hook on the autopsy because it was a friend. You said you had to cancel. You never saw me sneak into your office and close the door quietly. I remember setting out the blanket on the floor, icing the wine, and setting out the food right as you finished. You were heading back to the office with this strange look on your face and when you stepped inside I started the soft, sultry Jazz CD Frost had burned for me. There were candles around your office giving just enough light." Jane bent her head back some and looked at Maura. "I thought you were going to cry, just like you look now." Tommy smiled as Jane wove the images to bring Maura's memories forward. He always knew his sister was a romantic at heart.

"I was so surprised." Maura wiped a tear from her cheek. "I had been looking forward to that date for months. I was so mad at the mayor for making me do the autopsy that night. Then I walked into the office and I thought…" Maura stopped just remembering even as Jane peered up at her curiously.

"You thought what Maura?" Jane asked even as Tommy waited to hear with baited breath.

"I thought I had finally found the right person, someone who wouldn't let things get in the way of them loving me. You don't know how important what you did was Jane." Maura said softly as tears dropped from Maura's face to Jane's. Jane turned kissing her love softly.

"Yeah, I think I do." Jane said softly. Tommy rose to leave and give the women some privacy. Jane broke away from Maura. "Hey, sit yourself back down. I have all the time with Maura in the world. You came to visit. Sit." Jane said grabbing Tommy by the hand and pulling him down.

"Okay, okay. You don't have to play rough." Tommy said, but smiled all the same. Maura giggled a little as Jane resettled herself between the medical examiner's legs. Maura pulled Tommy into a hug.

"Thank you for coming up. It means a lot to Jane and I." Tommy hugged her back just holding the doctor for a while his hand placed on Jane's shoulder where his sis could reach it and tuck it under her chin.

"I'm sorry about ma. I tried to talk some sense into her. I know she loves you both. Heck, she isn't even having trouble with the church part. I think it's how it looks to others especially her best friend Carla Tulucci. Since the divorce ma is more aware of which friends stayed with her and which ones just dropped her for dad. It hurt her a lot." Tommy said trying to give Jane and Maura some incite.

"Carla has never had a problem with gay people Tommy. Hell, her son is gay though he hasn't come out of the closet yet." Jane said her voice and tension rising. Maura squeezed Jane's shoulder making her relax a little. "Sorry."

"Nah, you don't have to apologize to me. Ma and Carla were talking about you two and Carla made a stupid statement. Not to mention mom hears all the rumblings around BPD. Most at your work are okay with you two, but there are some that aren't. They are pretty vocal about it when they have been in the café even going as far to say something must have been wrong with mom. Most especially since dad divorced her." Jane shot up from the ground in anger startling Tommy and Maura.

"That is such bullshit! Who are they Tommy? Tell me there names and I will make sure and straighten this out." Jane grabbed her side, but didn't relent in her tirade. "He wanted to call us bastards Tommy just so he could have some two bit floosy. Then he…he…." Jane stopped and turned away. No she had promised she would never mention what had happened. Everyone would be kept in the dark. Maura started to move toward Jane only to be stopped by Tommy. Tommy walked up behind Jane even as Frankie jogged over after noticing the altercation.

"What did he do Jane?" Tommy asked grabbing hold of his sister's shoulders turning her around. Tommy softly moved the hair behind her ear and lifted her chin. "Look at me, what did pa do?"

"He came to the hospital on one of the days you were all out getting something to eat. We were talking and I told him about Maura and I." Jane said her voice barely a whisper as she looked over Tommy's shoulder to where Frankie stood wrapping Maura with a blanket from the cool night air. Tommy forced her attention back on him.

"What did he say Jane?" Tommy asked seriously now wanting to know what his father had done to his sister.

"He said obviously I couldn't be his daughter and ma must have slept around because no woman loving lesbian could have ever come from his loins. He then said I was dead to him." Jane broke Tommy's grip and began to turn away. "Ma, got the annulment papers shortly after that. So you see if ma can't accept Maura and I, I have lost both of them. I'm alone." Tommy immediately grabbed hold of Jane and turned her around. Frankie had let go of Maura coming to stand beside Tommy.

"You are wrong! You will never be alone. He can say anything he wants, but you are a Rizzoli. You have more value and worth than he will ever have." Tommy said even as he enveloped Jane.

"Tommy's right, if they can't accept it then to hell with them. You are our sister and we aren't letting you go." Frankie snarled grabbing the back of Jane's neck and reassuringly squeezing it. Jane was now sandwiched in between her two brothers who wouldn't let her go, so Jane let go. She let go all the grief and pain she had been carrying since that day in the hospital. Both men stood holding Jane up even as she wavered in strength. Maura came forward finally understanding some things her lover had said along the way. She finally understood why Jane would feel so deeply rejected. Maura's family had been being knitted back together with the help of this amazing woman, even as Jane's had been falling apart.

"I will not leave you." Maura's strong voice carried to Jane's ears as the boys parted enough to let her in to envelop Jane and then they wrapped themselves around the two women shielding them from the outside world. "You are not alone Jane Rizzoli. Don't you ever think for one moment you are, do you hear me?" Maura said firmly Tommy and Frankie's reassuring squeeze of their hands letting Jane know it physically.

"Yeah, I get it." Jane looked up at the three faces in front of her. "What am I going to do with you three?" Frankie smiled deciding it was time to lessen the tension.

"Could you find me a wife? Maybe, someone who looks a lot like Maura?" Jane and Maura broke out in laughter.

"Hey, I was going to ask that?" Tommy said even as Jane's tears lessened. Jane kissed both the boys on the head and wrapped her arm around Maura.

"Let's go back and enjoy this bonfire you all made. You sure you have enough wood." Jane asked even as the boys took over the conversation.

"Man, you always question whether we have enough of this or did we do that?" The boys started in as they walked back. "Remember when she told us you couldn't wash a cat? Man, was she wrong." Laughter rang out as they headed down the beach to the fire. Maura stopped Jane briefly letting the boys get ahead of them.

"I love you Jane Rizzoli. My family will be your family. Where you go, I will go. Where you live, I will live. I will never leave you. I will cling to you as a vine clings to the wall." Maura said softly watching as something deeply inside Jane clicked into place.

"You have been reading the book of Ruth Maura. Why?" Jane asked as they started to walk again.

"I have eclectic tastes. Plus it is a fantastic love story." Maura said as an idea formed in her head.

"I love you Maura. One way or another, we will work through this too." Jane said hoping deep in heart that didn't mean losing her last parent. Jane raised her head as Frost and Aine pulled her into the circle of warmth away from the cold night air.


	46. Chapter 46

**Glazed Feelings**

**Part 46**

**Rizzoli and Isles is the property of TNT and Tess Gerritson. I am just borrowing them for a little angst. I have taken a twist in this chapter that may unsettle some of you. All I ask is that if you're going to let me be lambasted, then let me have it with both barrels. I seem to dance to my own tune. Oh, yes there are repercussions from my own life that are related here. I hope you enjoy your humble bard, Deanlu.**

"Angela, we need to talk." Korsak said as he stepped into the kitchen setting down the dishes from the table. After Jane and Maura had stepped out and the guys had gone to make a bonfire, Korsak and Dr. Fontaine had both decided to take on Angela. Angela wiped her hands on a towel and braced her hands against the sink. She really didn't want to talk with Korsak, Dr. Fontaine or anyone else about Jane and Maura's relationship. She would love to hide in ignorant bliss, but she knew that would not happen.

"There is nothing to talk about Vince. Jane and Maura have made their decision. Now, we move forward." Angela said trying to move the conversation past where it was going.

"You're wrong. Angela I have known Janie for a long time. I have seen her at her worst. The one thing she could always count on was her family being there when everything went wrong. Now when she needs you most she can't count on you. Why? What's so bad about Jane and Maura being together?" Korsak asked as he grabbed Angela's hands.

"What's so bad? Vince it's a sin in the eyes of the church!" Angela barked breaking the hold of his hands and walking toward the dining room. "Think about what everyone says about them Vince. Think about how they talk about the two women lesbians at BPD."

"So what if people talk about them! They love each other Angela. You don't seem an overly religious type either, so I know it is not the line the church takes on homosexuality that is bothering you. Heck, you're the one who told me that the churches stance on homosexuality is antiquated. So what is it? Why suddenly is it okay for everyone else and not Jane?" Vince said as he pursued her into the living room. Dr. Fontaine just watched from the table letting the detective interrogate Angela.

"Oh, you think that's how it is? That I don't care about anyone else and how it affects them? You think it's just Jane and Maura's relationship that bothers me? Well, you're wrong!" Angela yelled at Vince, anger bubbling to the surface. "What if Frankie came to me tomorrow and told me he was gay? What if you caught Frost in a compromising position with another guy? How would you react when all your life you were raised to believe one thing and suddenly confronted with another thing?" Angela seethed with indignation. Vince fired back attempting to get Angela to see reason.

"First of all we are not talking about Frankie or Barry. We are talking about Jane. Secondly, I would be shocked at first, but then happy that they had found someone who loved and cared for them. You may have been raised Angela to think that marriage and love was between a man and a woman, but I know you're not that narrow minded to think it's the only way." Vince hollered back looking toward the open back patio doors to where he could see Maura, Jane, and Tommy down the beach talking hoping they could not hear the argument.

"Don't you hear how they talk about her at BPD Vince? Don't you hear how they call my baby DYKE! How they talk about if they could just get her with a real man they could change her? How no wonder she would never date anyone from work? They have left things in her desk, her locker, and even on her computer to degrade and destroy her." Angela said now working herself into a major tizzy. "They think I don't know Vince. I hear them though. They say it must have been her mother and father. It must have been genetically tainted DNA that caused her to be Lesbian. How do you think that makes me feel Vince? I shouldn't have to defend my daughter's sexual choices!" Vince watched how Angela seethed over this issue. He loved her deeply, but she had to change or they could not be together. Jane's friendship and trust were just too important. He had made his peace with the issue a long time ago understanding exactly as Dr. Isles did that sexuality could be fluid. Maybe not for him, but for others it could be. It wasn't his place to say who others could be with. Hell, he had trouble enough with his own personal choices, how could he dictate to others when his life had been so imperfect? "She was meant to marry a man Korsak! She was meant to bear me grandchildren! She was meant to grow old with someone who loves her and will be strong for her. Do you honestly see her having that with Maura?" Angela yelled back now having caught the attention of Barry and Aine outside near the fire. The two men did not enter, but they did harken to the argument inside the beach house. Angela turned away from Vince toward the fireplace. She wrapped her arms around herself feeling alone at this moment. Why didn't anyone understand?

"Yes, I do! Don't you hear yourself Angela? Hasn't Maura stuck by her through thick and thin when everyone else would have abandoned Jane? When choices were to risk Maura's life too?" Vince said with a surety he had never felt before over anything. Angela turned with an incredulous look on her face. Korsak pushed forward trying to get Angela to see everything clearly. "Would you defend Jane if she married a man?" Korsak asked softly.

"Yes, I would." Angela said gaining a little control. Korsak stepped closer.

"Would you defend her even if this man was crippled? Considered useless and could not bear you grandchildren?" Angela turned a little looking at Korsak.

"Yes, they could always adopt or there are other options." Angela said suddenly realizing the trap she had fallen into with Vince's soft words. "It's not the same."

"It is the same. You have let your dreams and bias causes a break in your bond with Jane." Vince approached Angela taking her by the shoulders. "I have seen Janie at her worst when death surrounded her. I have watched her look for someone, something to grasp onto to hold onto life. Her relationships have never been evaluated on whether they were men or women. They have always been about Jane feeling something for the other person. Whether she could trust them? Whether they wanted something from her? You are not enough for Janie to hold on to life Angela. She needs Maura. Maura won't let her slip away, won't accept excuses from her, won't let her hide her inner self, and won't let her run away. Maura compliments Jane in ways that no one else ever has in this life. Maura is the other half of Jane without her Janie is a shadow of who we know." Angela broke away from Vince moving away from him and yelling even as tears fell down her face.

"You're wrong! She had it with Casey. She had it with Dean. She could have had it with Joey Grant if she would just let herself accept it. We don't get to choose the person we love in life Vince! It happens." Angela shut her mouth suddenly realizing she had said too much. She went to leave the room when her way was blocked by Dr. Fontaine.

"It wasn't that way for you was it Angela. You didn't get to marry the person of your dreams." Dr. Fontaine stated in a no nonsense voice. She knew there was something underlying all of this, but she hadn't been able to quite figure it out. Now the cat was out of the bag. Angela tried to escape now, but Vince blocked her other escape toward the patio door. "What happened? Who were you meant to be with?" Dr. Fontaine questioned moving closer even as Vince took Angela's hand and made her sit down on the couch. Angela seemed to deflate some leaning heavy against Vince. "Was it a woman?"

"No." Angela's voice was small barely detectable. "His name was Amadeo." Angela had forced memories of the man she loved so deeply down there resurrection was like being dragged over broken glass.

"Tell us, what happened?" Dr. Fontaine said softly even as Vince held Angela closely. No one had seen Jane come onto the porch to get a drink from the cooler. Nor did they see her slide closer to the patio doors into the shadow where no one could see.

"I was so in love with him. I had been for a very long time. He was from a good family. His mother never cared for me, but it didn't matter to Amadeo. He was police officer." Angela tears began to run down her face. Angela looked at Vince. "A beat cop, a lot like you Vince in ways." Vince smiled squeezing Angela a little. Angela turned back to Dr. Fontaine taking a deep sigh. "We did everything together. This was two summers before I met Frank. He was my best friend. The other half of my soul at least I thought he was for me. He always told me we were just friends, but I believed we were more. There was something so different about him, something special." Angela said rising and moving away from the two adults. "I didn't know until late one night when I went to visit him at home. We had a habit of meeting in the backyard, sitting outside watching the stars. I never expected…I was shocked…" Angela's voice stuttered to a halt.

"What did you see?" Dr. Fontaine pushed as Jane came closer to the doors to hear. Maura had slid up behind her worried when Jane hadn't returned to the conversation around the bonfire. Jane held her finger to her lips warning Maura to be quiet.

"Amadeo was on the back porch with another man. They were kissing. I don't mean a peck on the cheek. I mean a deep, passionate kiss that would light a fire. I became so angry. I…I didn't think what I was doing." Angela voice rumbled. "I felt betrayed. We had been friends for years, but he never told me. I had planned out our future together. I was so angry, so deceived. Amadeo had kept it so hidden. I now know why years later, but then all I wanted was vengeance for what he had hidden from me." Jane felt a cold sinking feeling. Her body began to shake believing she knew where this was heading. Maura grew tense behind Jane hoping it wasn't what she believed it was, but knowing it deep down. It had been the fears that had kept Jane and her apart for a long time.

"What happened?" Dr. Fontaine asked Angela waiting patiently. Angela wrapped her arms around herself as the sound of an animal in deep pain came from her lips. Vince rose to go to her, but Dr. Fontaine stopped him forcing him to sit until Angela spoke. "What happened, Angela? What did you do?" Angela turned fury and pain echoing off her toward everyone in the room.

"I outed him. I outed him to his family, his friends, and job. I humiliated him, destroyed any chance he had for a life here in Boston!" Angela howled even as Vince's face dropped in unbelievable shock. Jane stumbled back toward Maura from the shadow of the doorway. Dr. Fontaine nodded, though she was shocked. "I was stupid. I destroyed our friendship and his life. God, I wish I had never done it. I was young and stupid. They say hindsight is 20/20. Well they are right. He was everything. I could have spent the rest of my life as his friend and been happy." But it was what Angela said next that pushed a nail through Jane's gut. "Ironic, isn't it. Now I am being punished because my daughter is a lesbian and plans on marrying a woman. I have a son who has been to prison for running over a priest. I have another son who wants to be as brave as his sister and will probably die in the same way she will one day by a bullet in a dirty alley with no one to care." Angela had stopped crying and was laughing now. "I married a man who professed to love me, bore him three children, and then he left me for a hot bimbo. How long Dr. Fontaine will I pay for hurting Amadeo? How long? Why can't I have a normal life?" Angela yelled letting years of pent up self-loathing and immolation to claw to the surface and explode.

"So I am a punishment!" Jane said angrily from the doorway. Maura had been trying to get Jane to hold back, but it had been to no avail. Angela turned with a cry as Vince and Dr. Fontaine rose quickly. "That's how you see us. Tommy, Frankie, and I are a punishment!" Jane accused her voice rising.

"No, Jane. I…" Angela tried to explain, but Jane cut her off.

"I don't want to hear it. I just don't care." Jane turned and walked down to the bonfire. She sat in a chair even as Maura sat down next to her wrapping her arms around her. Tommy and Frankie sat near Jane and Maura while Aine and Barry handed them all beers. Tommy spoke first chuckling even though he didn't feel like it inside.

"Welcome to the Rizzoli clan. Just when you thought you knew everything about them out of the closets come the skeletons." Tommy looked over at Maura with an earnest face. "I know you love Jane. Are you sure you want to be married into it though." Maura sighed thinking about her past family life.

"Yeah, I do at least when your family implodes you know with yelling, hurt, and pain all out in the open. The alternative is worse trust me." Maura said even as her lover sat next to her with tears leaking down her face and darkness clouding her soul. Tommy hugged Jane even as Frankie hugged Maura.


	47. Chapter 47

**Glazed Feelings**

**Part 47**

**Rizzoli and Isles are the property of TNT and Tess Gerritson. I am borrowing them for a little angst. We are coming to the end my friends. Jane and Maura's story will continue in a second part. After all, we have a physical therapy to get through not to mention we need to meet dad's blonde bimbo and the havoc that causes.**

The early dawn light woke Jane. Maura was still asleep wrapped around the detective and settled quiescent in her arms. Jane pondered everything she loved about this woman who she held in her close. She ran a light hand along the edge of Maura's naked body taking in the curves and crevices making the gorgeous woman arch in her sleep into Jane's touch and whimper softly. Jane kissed her lovers cheek and the top of Maura's head grateful for the loving absolution she found in this woman. Jane gently slid from her lovers grasp tucking the sheet softly around the doctor before laying a silent kiss on her brow to pad softly on bare feet out of the bedroom. Last night had been a bomb shell of family history and emotional angst. Jane knew there were things her parents argued about in the dark of the night that she knew nothing about, but her mother's bomb shell almost killed Jane's heart and belief in where she fit in the family. Now in the light of the coming day Jane tried to put everything into perspective. She hobbled to the kitchen pulling the Swiss mocha flavored coffee beans down from the cabinet. She had ground them the morning before not wanting to wake Maura or family today. She went through the motions of making coffee while thinking about how everything really fit into her life now. She then filled a carafe, grabbed a cup, and heading to the back patio table. She had grown use to watching the ocean and light of the day advance. It seemed to be a solace in all the upheaval she felt recently. Jane poured a cup, sat back and drew a knee up to think. She knew her mother loved her, but why had she acted out now about Jane and Maura's relationship. Jane sat drinking her coffee until she heard the creak of wood.

"Do you mind if I join you?" Angela's soft words asked her daughter. Jane shook her head no. Her ma had brought a cup so coffee was poured. They sat in tense silence for a long time. "Go ahead, ask?" Angela said defeat sounding in her voice. Jane sat for a while longer as the horizon burnished reds and purples against the midnight blue of the water.

"Why now? Why didn't you tell me this was how you felt months ago when Maura and I were beginning together?" Jane asked painfully curious of her mother's hidden reticence to the women's relationship. "I mean you never even indicated that you were concerned or angry about the relationship." Angela sighed desperately wanting to take back words she had said last night.

"I don't want you to have another relationship. I like Maura. No, I love Maura. She is a beautiful woman both inside and out. I just don't want you to have to face people like me Jane. I don't want you to face the hurt this world will bring with a same sex relationship. I have been selfish in my viewpoints and my treatment of you." Her mother's countenance reflected the deep shamed of the words and pain she had caused her eldest child. Angela turned to face Jane the shame showing blatantly across her features. "I never knew your father came to you while you were in the hospital. I wish I had, maybe things would have been different."

"What? Different for you because then you both could have ganged up on me? That would have made you happy dooming me to a life of unhappiness, just going through the motions." Jane said as the ire began to rise in her again.

"No, Jane. No." Angela took a deep drink of her coffee attempting to center herself. "It might have made me realize how stupid I was being. How much of my anger at myself I was taking out on you, Maura, and the boys." Jane set her cup down and leaned forward now listening to her mother. "I love you Jane. I love you and the boys with a depth you will never understand. I have held so much pain in for so long that it had begun to cloud my judgment and focus. I have a lot of issues to deal with and I can say that I have unfairly taken them out of you." Angela said sighing and running her hands over her face. She had never talked to any of her children like this and she had never wanted too, but the abyss that separated them needed to be closed. "I talked with Dr. Fontaine into the wee hours of the morning. I have done a great deal I am ashamed of Jane, but not you and not the boys."

"It's hard to believe after last night ma. I feel like the ground, the foundation I have stood on has been ripped out from under me by a lie." Jane said softly feeling the hurt like a vice on her chest. Angela nodded leaning back feeling old and tired.

"Jane, you know I love Maura. I kept telling you she was like the daughter I never had not to hurt you, but to let you know that in some way I approved plus she was finally someone who wanted me in their life who I could do all the things you hated...Shopping, discussing men, decorating, and talking about my family. I had hoped inside you two were just friends. I saw it, the love you felt for each other. At first I tried to fool myself that it was a sisterly type of love for two lonely souls, but after a while I knew for sure. It was the same kind of love I felt for Amadeo. I was so sure Maura would reject you that I forgot that she could feel that way for you too. Then when you had asked her to marry you the first time and she accepted I became jealous and angry. Angry that I was denied the love of my life, but my daughter was granted the love of her life, it was all so unfair in my eyes. But I was determined to make it work. I was determined to be the best mother-in-law Maura could ever know and the best mother you could handle" Angela said with a tiny smile which Jane snorted and smiled back too.

"So what changed?" Jane asked softly needing to understand. Angela took a deep breath reaching out and taking her daughters hands into her own.

"Your father asked for a divorce and I came to work in the cafeteria at BPD." Angela said raising her head to look at her daughter. "I knew you had it rough as a female, but I didn't know how badly till I came there. I kept getting the snide comments too about your masculine traits, how close you and Dr. Isles seemed, and the speculation of whether you two were or weren't. Then you and Maura had the falling out at the warehouse incident. I never knew all the details, but I was sure it was a sign you shouldn't be together. I thought it just reinforced everything from what I thought with Amadeo. I was wrong. I know that after talking with Dr. Fontaine and Vince. I am not all the way there yet Jane, but I want to be. I want to earn your trust and faith in me back." Angela said softly and reached to pour another cup of coffee hiding her pain. Jane's hand stopped her, forced her to look at her daughter.

"I don't know if I can do that." Angela's face fell as her hands dropped into her lap. Jane tried to vocalize everything she felt was feeling at that moment. "You have hurt Tommy and Frankie. You've hurt Maura. You have hurt me deeply. I love you ma, don't get me wrong, but as much as you need time, I will need time now. You can't repair this overnight. You can't fix how broken I am feeling. I have always counted on you being there when everything else blew apart in my life. Now…" Jane's voice dropped off and she shook her head. "For now let's just try and salvage this weekend. No arguments, just let's be a family as best as we can. Okay?" Jane looked up hopefully though she didn't feel that way. Angela nodded understanding they had a long way to go. They weren't getting there today.

"All right, peace for now. Let me get breakfast started. How are your ribs?" Angela asked as she rose the worry of a mother for her offspring coming through. "I know that Dr. Fontaine says you're settling a lot of the demons that have tortured you for a long time and I can tell that you're physically recovering with Maura's help, but I do worry. Does Maura know how much pain you're really hiding inside?" Angela said hating the distant look in Jane's eyes especially knowing she had put it there.

"Painful, but I will be fine when I eat and take my medication. Yes, she knows. She doesn't push too hard, but I am listening to her. Stop worrying." Jane said distantly looking toward the sea as something occurred to her. Angela nodded and began to walk away, but Jane's voice stopped her. "Ma, what happened to Amadeo?" The gentle ocean breeze stirred Angela's hair briefly giving Jane a glimpse of the girl that once loved the handsome man of her dreams.

"He moved to California with the man he was kissing that night. They married and live in San Francisco now. He…he wrote me a few years ago to apologize for not saying anything to me. He told me he forgave me. He has four kids and is a Captain in one of the police precincts." Angela said softly as she moved away toward the kitchen.

"Did you ever write him? Apologize to him?" Jane asked her mother. Angela stopped trembling some and turned gauging the look she now received from her daughter. There was a need to know if Angela was truly sorry for what she did then. Angela recognized it for what it was in her daughter a desire to know if her mother's moral or ethical codes were completely destroyed.

"I wrote the letter four years ago when you and Maura met. I have never sent it, but I think it's time." Angela then went to the kitchen to make breakfast. Jane sat stunned on the patio trying to add together everything she had been told the last few days. God, she felt overwhelmed.

"Oh, what tangled webs we weave when first we practice to deceive." Jane said softly. Maura's voice echoed back softly from behind.

"The wind breadth soft as lover's sigh, And, oft renewed, seemed oft to die, With breathless pause between, Oh who with speech of war and woes, Would wish to break the soft repose Of such enchanting scene!" Maura voice echoed as she came around to kiss Jane deeply, passionately pouring all the love she could into that one kiss. They pulled away from each other softly resting foreheads and noses together. "It is awfully early in the morning to be quoting the Marmion by Sir Walter Scott. What has transpired that leads your thoughts to such a deep subject, besides your mother?" Jane pulled Maura into her lap flinching at the sudden pressure to her ribs. Maura wanted to protest, but Jane held fast. She gazed at the woman she loved shaking her head.

"I have been gone too long." Jane said softly. Maura cocked her head with a confused look at her lover inquisitively trying to figure out what Jane meant. "That ends today." When Jane looked up Maura no longer saw the confused and disarrayed woman from the last few weeks. She now saw the hardened hero she loved, burnished by fire, chilled by brushes with evil, and polished with her desire for justice shining through. Jane pulled Maura down into a hard, crushing kiss pouring her desire into every nip and touch from hands that roamed the woman's body. Jane hadn't possessed her like this since the night in the surf when Maura surrendered to the detective. Jane grabbed Maura and threw her over her shoulder powering through the living room startling her mother and Vince who was standing by the kitchen stove whispering. Jane flinched a couple of times from the pain in her ribs, but headed toward the bedroom with the woman she loved. She needed to feel in control once again.

"Jane, put me down. You're going to hurt yourself. Jane!" Maura yelled and struggled to get Jane to release her worried the detective would harm all the healing she had done up to now. The only sound she heard was Vince laughing in the background. Jane pushed the door to her bedroom open and dumped Maura on the bed. The bedroom door was closed with a slam and the click of a lock being engaged was heard. Smoldering deep brown eyes captured the doctor's and sent shivers down her spine. In the kitchen, Vince turned the stove off where breakfast was cooking. He grabbed Angela's arm guiding her toward the front door.

"Jane, we are going out for breakfast. We will see you later." Vince hollered as Jane stalked forward toward the bed causing Maura to scramble back toward the headboard.

"Jane! Jane what has gotten into you?" Jane began to crawl forward toward Maura like a black panther hunting its prey passion and heat igniting the air around her. "Jane, you need to stop. You are recovering from a serious injury." Maura gasped as ruby red lips smothered the doctor's words while hands began a tantalizing duet over her body. "Oh God…Jane…you have to stop…you are not…" Maura moaned to her lover even as her voice was silenced again in a soul searing kiss. "Jane" Slowly the words became more breathless turning from attempting to stop Jane to complete and utter surrender. "Oh Jane."

Hours later, a sated, limp Maura Isles lay in her bed with a happily humming detective next to her. The sun was now high in the sky and the sounds of food being prepared in the kitchen could be heard once again. Outside, the sounds of a rather boisterous game of volleyball involving Frost, Tommy, Frankie, and Aine was taking place interspersed with the cry of seagulls and children who had arrived with their parents to enjoy the weekend.

"Not that I am complaining Jane, but could you tell me where all that came from dear?" Maura felt like jelly, maybe even protoplasmic ooze would be a better definition. Never had she had such a physical occasion in her life. It was like Jane had been possessed demanding everything Maura could give her and beyond. The doctor felt unbelievably loved not that she hadn't given as good as she had received. She had tried more positions in the last several hours than in all her life. The Kama Sutra had nothing on her partner whom was possessed with an incredible mind and body, even if the latter was recuperating. Maura looked at the clock. Oh God, they had made love for four hours straight. Jane had barely given her time to recover before she was leading her body into the next orgasm…the next possession. Then something occurred to her…"No physical activity at all Doctor Isles. None. This is important Maura." Dr. Reynolds words came floating back to Maura. Tension returned to her body suddenly and she was up moving over Jane.

"Are you okay?" Jane's eyes opened to reveal a deep, caramel color reflecting back at Maura. "Jane, your eyes they have lightened." Jane pulled the doctor down kissing her deeply again igniting the burning sensation that had consumed them for the last several hours. Maura pulled away resisting the feeling with all her might. "Are…you…okay?" Jane smiled and shook her head no. Maura's heart dropped in fear she had injured Jane.

"Nope, I feel fantastic." Jane said with a soft chuckle. Maura smiled in relief and dropped down for a slow sultry kiss from her amorous lover.

"Tell me what is going on inside." Maura said as Jane relented.

"I've just decided the old Jane needs to get off her self-sanctimonious, whiney butt, and get to work." Jane said smiling up at Maura. "I can't change the past. What's done is done. I can, however, change the future. I love you Maura. I plan on showing you when and how every moment. I love my partner's I work with so I am going to be the best, strongest, and smartest partner they can ever have. I love my family, even if they are a little messed up and confused. We will deal with it and love them through it. Yeah, it hurts Maura. I'm not denying that in anyway. I just can't stay sitting here feeling miserable. I have too much of life to live with you. Ma has agreed to work on her problems and I hope that means with Dr. Fontaine. It really is her problem though. My soul concern now is moving forward with us." Jane said softly kissing Maura's bare shoulder smelling the musky, sweet scent of their earlier love making.

"You amaze me detective. You have an inner strength that just blows me away. Just when I think there is no way you will recover from something you do. You begin to heal and knit yourself back together. You step forward even when not a hundred percent healthy knitting others back together. How Jane? How can you be so strong when there are so many storms?" Maura asked trying to find how this one woman could change so many people.

"You. You, Maura Isles!" Jane kissed Maura softly. "You make me want to go on and be a better person. Come on, let's get some food and join the others." Jane released a stunned medical examiner and rolled out of bed. She caught herself from stumbling when a surge of pain hit her. This broke the spell Maura had been under causing her to catch Jane and help her sit. "It's just pain. I'm a little late for the pain medication." Jane said glancing toward the clock. Well, over twelve hours late. She had pocketed the one she was to take before bed last night.

"All right, let's get you dressed, put some food into you and then how about we enjoy the weekend with our crazy family." Maura said cheerfully, though she felt she should be harping on Jane and how she avoided the medication.

"Sounds great Maura. You know I feel like I have been living this surreal life for so long. All these feelings I have had glazed over and smothering me inside. I feel different today. I feel energetic, rejuvenated, and…" Jane said suddenly looking into Maura's eyes as she helped her stand.

"And…?" Maura asked looking back searching Jane's expression. Jane leaned forward kissing her.

"And loved, completely, utterly, loved." Jane said softly. Maura melted into Jane totally understanding what she meant.

"Say that tomorrow when we start your physical therapy." Maura said as Jane groaned a little. Maura laughed and helped Jane dress to begin her day anew.

**I am intending to end this in the next chapter, unless I hear different. Then I will carry it on into the physical therapy that Jane has to work through. My intention was to end it and start a shorter second part dealing with the complications of Patty Doyle, Constance and her husband, Angela's continuing struggle with her feelings about Jane and Maura's relationship. You all let me know what you think. **

**Your humble bard, Deanlu.**


	48. Chapter 48

**Glazed Feelings**

**Part 48**

**Rizzoli and Isles are the property of TNT and Tess Gerritson. I am only borrowing the nature of the character for some fun, pain, hurt, laughter; fear…okay so I am out right taking advantage of the characters. There ya have it. I watched last night's Rizzoli and Isles with great anticipation. They did a good job, but its next weeks I am looking forward too. Murdered couples and an unexpected kidnapping bwahahahaha…sound like another HOYT!~. I love it.**

'So you didn't listen to the restrictions?" The doctor asked looking at Jane. Jane for her part looked everywhere, but at the doctor. When no answer was coming the doctor sighed. "Ms. Rizzoli…"

"Detective Rizzoli!" Jane responded finally. The Doctor smiled and continued.

"Ms. Rizzoli since you seem not to want to respect the wishes of your doctor…" Doctor Berkley said, "Then I will just have to force my hand in the situation. You have some minor internal bleeding around this area. He pointed to the ribs. It means detective you strained more than you should doing something you were not supposed to do. I am admitting you for one to two days." Dr. Berkley said as Jane began to protest. "NO! It is out of your hands now detective I need to do more tests and I need to make sure the bleeding does not continue. If you continue to protest I will contact BPD and Dr. Reynolds reporting to them that you seem intent on harming yourself. Do…I…Make…Myself…Clear?" Dr. Berkley said with emphasis. Jane sighed and nodded. She couldn't have work finding out she had not done what she was supposed to do. She was already skating on thin ice with her health insurance and the department's health coverage. Seems after the shooting to take down the bad cop the departments insurance had qualified Jane as high risk. Jane had to sign a special paper stating that all incidents were to go through a review board due to the frequency of her injuries.

"I'm sorry. I will follow your advice and stay in the hospital for one night." Jane said emphasizing one night. The doctor gauged her words and mood for a moment. He nodded and wrote something down.

"Good, one moment please." The doctor said as Jane lay back on the examining table. The doctor walked out leaving Jane to ponder what Maura was going to say. Maura had forced her here after the family had left for home when Jane complained about shortness of breath. Now she was stuck again.

"Hello detective, your girlfriend is out in the other room with the doctor. I have been sent to transfer you to your room. We will get you settled. Please place these on." The male nurse said handing Jane a gown and then leaving the room. Jane swore as she worked to remove her clothes and place the gown on her body. She knew she had over done it. It probably hadn't been smart carrying Maura, making love to the beautiful doctor though she had taken the less physically stressful positions, and avoiding the medication was probably not smart. She just wanted things back to normal. Finally dressed Jane climbed back onto the exam table. The male nurse peeked in and the entered carrying a bag for Jane's things. He also had a wheelchair with him. "My name is Jacob by the way. I have this lovely chariot for you if you would step down my lady." Jacob helped Jane into the wheelchair. Once secure they left the room. Maura was waiting with an annoyed look on her face, but she didn't say a word. She just followed alongside Jacob and Jane. "My, has the temperature fallen inside today. I am going to have to get them to check how cool they are making it." Jacob said as they entered the elevator to go to the third floor noticing the icy reception between the two women.

"Maur?" Jane subtlety reached out for Maura's hand. Maura looked down, let out an exasperated sigh, and gently grabbed the hand next to her. "Sorry" Jane said softly. Maura shook her head pinching the bridge of her nose with her other hand. Suddenly, she turned and kissed the detective. When they broke from the kiss Maura gave Jane what for immediately.

"No more detective. You will follow the doctor's orders to the letter or I will cut you off for a month. Do you understand?" Maura growled low as Jane's eyes grew wide. The detective nodded vigorously knowing Maura meant it. Jacob chuckled to himself.

"It seems the temperature is rising again. Hmmm, they really need to fix those thermostats in the hospital." The doors to the elevator opened as Doctor Isles chuckled and followed the nurse to Jane's room.

"When Jane's involved things are always hot Jacob." Maura said as they entered room 315. Jacob laughed as Jane blushed. Jacob helped her get settled into the bed. He then stepped aside when the phlebotomist came in to draw blood three tubes later and an IV line established Jane was settled quietly in bed with Maura in a comfy recliner next to the bed.

"I'll be back in a few minutes Jane. I have you down for the roast beef for dinner tonight. Sound okay?" Jacob said as he made a notation into the chart.

"Yeah, that's fine." Jane waited for him to leave before she broached any topic for with Maura. Once Jacob had left an unsettling silence fell over the room. Jane sighed and began. "I'm sorry. I know what I promised. I know what you promised. I should have never carried you to the bedroom, made love for four hours, or got into the accidental wrestling match with Frankie." Maura leaned back in the chair letting her fingers brush against Jane's, but never completely joining them together.

"Jane, did Dr. Berkley explain the complete reason you are here?" Maura asked concerned that Jane did not understand the extent that she had aggravated the injury.

"He said I had a small amount of internal bleeding. I needed to stay the night." Jane said watching as Maura's eyes said there was more to it. Maura leaned toward the bed gently taking Jane's hand. Jane could tell she was trying to figure out what to say to her.

"Jane, you did have internal bleeding, however, that is not why you are being made to stay. The bleeding has stopped because it clotted, but not properly." Maura said, but Jane cut her off before she could continue.

"What are you saying? Maura? I'm fine, there is nothing wrong." Jane said trying to refute what was starting to be made in clear in her mind.

"Jane, listen to me. You are not fine. You have a blood clot. They need to treat it with some medications to dissolve it carefully. This was one of the reasons you were supposed to rest and not be physical in any way." Maura said as Jane became pale suddenly. Jane started recalling the last time she had heard someone, probably Maura while they were in the morgue, talking about blot clots. If a part of the clot broke off and got lodged or made it to the heart a person could suffer a heart attack or stroke. It could kill them. Jane's respiration picked up as she broke out in a sweat…"it's my fault. I should have stopped you from acting…Jane? Jane, hey listen to me. It's going to be okay. They have caught it. It will be treated with medication and you will be fine." Maura knew it was a little more complicated than that, but she had to get Jane calmed down. "Hey…" Maura kissed Jane getting her attention as brown pensive eyes looked back at her. "It will be okay. A couple of days in the hospital and we will be back on the beach again. Okay?" Jane nodded. The door to the room opened as Jacob entered. He pulled three syringes with medication out. He then inserted them one by one into the IV receptacle.

"Jane I have given you the first medicine for the bleeding and clot. The second one is pain medication mixed with a sedative. The third is an antibiotic because you have contracted sepsis in the last month. Doctor Berkley wants to make sure there is no repeat of the infection." Jane's nostrils flared even as her eyes narrowed.

"There was no talk about putting me to sleep. I have a right to know when you all are going to do that." Jane said even as she could feel the medication starting to make her drowsy. Maura's glare told her to stop arguing. "But Maura I am fine. You know that…did you forget this morning already?" Jane said softly raising an eye brow. Maura shook her head even as a shiver ran down her spine.

"That is why you are in here detective! So be quiet and take your medicine." Maura said looking away from Jane even as Jacob finished smiling all the time. Jane pulled on Maura's hand making the doctor look back at her.

"Okay, but I am not holding back in physical therapy. Agreed?" Jane said to Maura. Maura looked at Jane's determined look even as she fought off the sedative.

"We shall see what you can give the physical therapist. I am more worried about your breathing going back to normal as you seem short of breath a lot more." Maura said as the surprise on Jane's face had marked her as being caught. "Yes, I knew you were trying to hide it. That will be sorted out in no time I am sure."

"Maura, I really hate hospitals." Jane said as she settled against the pillow and her eyes fluttered shut. The detective's breathing leveled out indicating she was sleeping.

"Me too, Jane. It seems like you have taken stock in them." Maura sighed and extended the recliner. The doctor was asleep in no time. She never heard Jacob return to the room and cover her with a blanket. The nurse checked Jane's vitals, made a small note on the respiration, and then left the room again. Jacob monitored Jane's breathing, heart and pulse from the nurses station. He quickly made his rounds to several rooms. When he returned Violet and Felicia the two other nurses on this wing were checking monitors. An alarm began screeching in one of the rooms. Jacob looked up as did Violet and Felicia. It was Jane Rizzoli's. Jacob quickly moved into Jane's room. Maura was sitting up in a daze. She had been asleep for about forty-five minutes when Jane's respiration became too shallow and the monitor alerted the nursing staff. Jacob gentle woke Jane.

"What? What is it?" Jane's voice groggy with sleep asked. Maura watched now as Jacob did his job to ascertain if Jane was in any danger.

"I need you to take a deep breath detective." Jane complied as much as she could. The alarm stopped ringing. "Good, keep it up." Jacob watched as Jane's oxygen saturation levels rose appropriately. He took her pulse and listened to her chest once the levels were normal. "You're fine Jane. When your breathing becomes too shallow the machine sounds to warn you could stop breathing. It's a precaution to make sure you do not. You may unfortunately for the next day or so not get much sleep here while we monitor you." The detective nodded leaning back against the pillow. Why did the little things have to be so difficult? "Dr. Isles, I noticed that Jane's physical therapy for breathing and the restricted movement will begin tomorrow morning by the way. I saw Dr. Berkley ordered it to begin here and then they will come to the beach house for the rest of the week. Once you return to Boston Dr. Reynolds has set up the PT for there. The doctors do not want any more lag time between the injury and recovery." Maura nodded finally relaxing after being reassured Jane was okay.

"Good, at least Jane will have something to preoccupy her time." Maura said softly. Jane glared at Maura.

"I was nicely preoccupied with you before this visit!" Jane said grumbling back. Maura laughed. She stood up from the recliner and kissed Jane on the head.

"I remember very vividly Jane. Every kiss…touch…and moan." Maura growled out softly against Jane's ear causing the detective's heart rate to increase as well as her breathing. "Get some rest. I am going down to the cafeteria to get some dinner. I will be back in a bit." Maura said kissing her girlfriend once again. Jane nodded, the sedative pulling her back into sleep. Maura walked to the door looking back to see her love finally resting. Maura wondered how long this would hold Jane back. She knew Cavanaugh had told Jane she would not be back until she was a hundred percent. Maura knew Jane though, she would be back long before that. The medical examiner shook her head and headed down to the cafeteria lost in thought. She never saw Aine McCalister approach Jane's door with a folder. She never saw him take a cleansing breath and hesitantly reach for the handle.


	49. Chapter 49

**Glazed Feelings**

**Part 49**

**Rizzoli and Isles are the property of TNT and Tess Gerritson. I am just borrowing them for some minor angst. Well ya can't recover without something to do with your time, right?**

"Jane" Aine said quietly causing the eyes of the detective to flutter open. Jane smiled as sleep clouded her features. It took her a moment to wake and then she saw the pensive look on Aine's face.

"What?" Jane asked curious. She noticed Maura wasn't around. "It's not Maura? Tell me nothing is wrong with Maura." Jane said becoming agitated suddenly.

"No Jane, Maura is fine just gone to get something to eat." Aine said reassuring his friend. Jane's heart rate returned slowly to normal when she noticed Aine holding a folder looking like he lost his best friend.

"I need a favor a really big one." Aine's voice strengthened. Jane nodded and Aine came over to her laying a folder in front of her. Jane scanned the case number. She then opened the file. Pictures of a couple brutally beaten, the wife raped, and then both stabbed to death slid across her lap.

"Aine? What is this?" Jane asked as she examined the pictures her brain feeling the teasing temptation of working a case after such a long period dormant. Aine stepped closer rolling the table for the bed over. He placed the file on it and spread the information out.

"We had a double homicide here before you came. We have been investigating the case, but we have hit a dead end. The two women were brutally beaten; both raped, and then stabbed." Aine said as Jane studied the information.

"These are two women? But this one looks like a man." Jane said startled as she continued to read. Aine sighed.

"He…she…was preparing for sex reassignment surgery. We have interviewed the family, both were very supportive. We interviewed friends, they all seem supportive too. The wife worked as a stock broker. The husband…partner was a renowned artist. None of their friends seem to fit the view. We check previous boyfriends and girlfriends, no luck. Nothing seems out of place with them. The house is three beach houses south of the one you and Maura are staying at currently. The suspect or suspects broke in through the front door by banging out the glass, reached in, and unlocked the door. They headed into the bedroom where they restrained the partners, and proceeded with the beatings."

"Anything stolen?" Jane asked Aine as she continued to read and glance at the photos. Aine shook his head.

"No, nothing was taken. Credit cards, cash, even the car was still there." Aine said softly. Jane looked up with a questioning look.

"Who found them?" Jane asked.

"The maid who cleans the house. She cleans most of those along your row of beach houses as they are owned by the same property company who manages them. The partner attempted to protect the wife. He…she fought off the attacker. We removed DNA from under the fingernails and another substance. We thought maybe Maura would look it over with you." Aine said clearing his throat softly when Jane went back to studying the information.

"The bodies still available?" Jane asked curiously. Aine nodded.

"I told the parents they would be released soon." Aine said though the pressure to release them now was greater than before. He wanted Maura to look over their pathologists findings. Reddig their pathologist was good, but he was in his late fifties looking toward retirement. He had agreed that Dr. Isles could probably find something he didn't. He was rather excited about it too. "I could use your feedback. I don't need you to go anywhere or do anything. I just need you to look over the information, the forensics, etc… and see if we missed something. I know you Jane. You have a mind like a steel trap. Nothing escapes it and it can puzzle out information most can't. So I am asking you, will you help me?" Jane was about to answer when the door to her room slammed.

"No Jane! You are recuperating from serious injuries and trauma." Maura sternly replied her voice like ice. Jane let out a slow breath. The two officers had never heard the quiet entry of Dr. Isles or seen her paling face as Aine asked for what he wanted from Jane.

"Aine, can you step outside for a moment while I talk to Maura." Jane asked the officer as Aine rose to comply.

"There is nothing to talk about. You just promised me Jane you would do what was necessary. Either you meant it or you didn't." Maura's voice was final. Jane dropped her head remembering all the hell she had put Maura through and what she had promised. Jane Rizzoli was good for her promises, but she hadn't been to Maura recently. The only one she had kept was to fight to survive. Aine felt caught between a rock and a hard place. He had expected this might happen, but he was desperate. He wanted to bring closure to the family and friends of the couple. He was sorely afraid that would not happen now. Jane's head rose with a disheartened look. Carefully the detective placed all the information back in the folder and handed it back to Aine.

"I'm sorry Aine. I am required to follow doctor's orders at this time. I cannot help you." Jane's wooden voice responded. She hated handing back the folder especially when she had seen some things that seemed out of place, just not quite right. Aine nodded looking over at the fuming doctor whom Jane loved. He should have brought it to both of them, not sought Jane out alone.

"I'm sorry too. I shouldn't have presumed you would be ready to take on this small task yet. Maybe, when you're more recovered you would take a look." Aine said walking toward the door where he received a glare from Doctor Isles. He stopped looking at Maura momentarily. "I would never have endangered Jane. I just wanted her to examine the case. You know how good she is doctor. I am sorry I have caused you two hardship in your relationship." Aine looked briefly toward Jane. "Sorry Jane." He then walked out of the room. It was quiet for about five minutes while both Jane and Maura waited for the other. It was Maura who blew first.

"How could you be so callous toward your health?" Maura yelled the sharp click of her high heels resounding louder than normal as she walked toward the bed. "What is it going to take to get you to slow down and recover?"

"Maura he was only asking for a consult. I wouldn't be going anywhere nor doing anything just studying the information." Jane said interrupting Maura.

"Jane Clementine Rizzoli don't you lie to me. It starts out that way. Then you want to interview a suspect. Then you want to see the scene. Before you know it you're running down some alleyway being shot at or hit over the back or tackling a suspect." Maura's measured and cold voice resounded, but there was a detectable quiver that helped Jane understand where all this displaced anger in Maura was coming from.

"I promise there…." Jane began firmly only to be cut off by Maura. Maura was wringing her hands now as she approached Jane's bed.

"You promise? You promise? A fat lot of good that will do when you don't even keep those promises." Maura said throwing Jane's words back at her. Maura continued her tirade. Jane sighed taking a minute to think while Maura was yelling at her. She knew it came from fear and worry. So Jane needed to reassure her somehow. It was time to take the lead again. When Maura came near Jane the detective reached over grabbed her by the arms and pulled her into the bed. It so startled Maura she stopped talking and looked at Jane. Jane kissed her not releasing the doctor until she relaxed under Jane ministrations. Jane continued the heated kiss waiting for Maura to totally acquiesce. Finally, ten minutes later Jane pulled Maura further into the bed and tucked her into her right side.

"I love you Maura Isles. I know I am stubborn, obstinate, and frustrating. I will not do this if you do not want me to, however, I ask you to hear me out." Jane watched Maura's fearful eyes close for a moment. A small shiver passed through the doctor's body and when she opened her eyes again they were clear.

"All right, I will hear you out. When you finish though, if I am still not convinced you will abide by what I say. Agreed?" Maura said calmly the raging anger and fear now gone from her voice as she was sheltered in Jane's arms. Jane nodded in agreement.

"Aine has asked me to consult nothing more. These people were a same sex couple. They had loving, supportive friends and family who are in distress over what happened to them. Aine and his people have done all they could, but are no closer to solving their murder. I looked at the folder for thirty minutes while you were gone and have already found five or six things that don't seem right two straight from the statements of a family member and a friend. I can also tell something is not right with one of the toxicology reports and some notations Dr. Reddig wrote into the autopsy. I may not be physically able to do my job, but my mind is sound. If I can give these friends and family some peace by just sitting and thinking, then tell me love where is the harm in it?" Jane asked softly. She patiently waited for Maura's response knowing the pathologist was trying to come up with every excuse she could that was a logical NO response. Finally, after about fifteen minutes of silence Jane felt Maura grab her and pull her closer.

"Damn you Jane Rizzoli for being so logical." Maura pushed back a little to look into Jane's eyes. "I don't want to agree to this because I have seen you when a case grabs hold of you. You can do so much damage with just the thinking Jane because you stop eating, sleeping, caring for yourself." Maura said as she groaned and let her head fall against Jane's chest. Still the detective waited on the doctor only wrapping the doctor in her arms and kissing the top of her head. Patience was Jane's key. Once a murder had been committed she really had all the time in the world. Yes, the first forty-eight hours were the key and normally solved eighty-five percent of the homicides, but the other fifteen percent took dogged persistence and patience. Jane used the same tactics with Maura and ya know what, sometimes it actually worked. Jane chuckled softly to herself hugging Maura tighter. "All right, you can work the case. No physical exertion though beyond your mental capacity. You will not, I repeat NOT do more than you are allowed by a doctor's advice. Understood!" Maura said as she stared Jane down. Jane for herself gave Maura a pouty look, but inside she was grinning like a Cheshire cat.

"All right, I agree to those terms. I do have one more thing to ask of you." Jane said softly trying to give the impression of a dog with its tale tucked between its legs. Maura eyed her knowing she wasn't going to like it.

"What Jane?" Maura asked as Jane smiled.

"Could you go over the autopsy reports and if needed, do the autopsy again?" Jane asked with a small childish whine. Maura lay back against the detective shaking her head.

"Yes, Jane. Now will you rest? I will let Aine know we will look it over when you arrive home in two days. All right?" Maura said grumpily. Jane smiled to herself, but acted sufficiently intimidated by the medical examiner.

"Okay. I love you Maura." Jane closed her eyes and started to drift off to sleep.

"Oh, Jane? You are not fooling me for one minute so do not think I don't know your acting like you have been persuaded for a reason. Che il dolore reale nell'obiettivo che amo." Maura ended in Italian. Jane opened her eyes and stared down at the doctor who had relaxed into her shoulder.

"Ma son oil suo dolore nell'obiettivo." Jane whispered softly into Maura's ear. Maura smiled as sleep washed over her.

"Si ama il mio." as her voice whispered out and washed into sleep. Jane followed seconds behind her arms wrapped around her love and a smile on her face.

**The Italian translation of what Maura and Jane whispered to each other. Maura: what a royal pain in the butt I love. Jane: But I am your pain in the butt. Maura: Yes love mine.**


	50. Chapter 50

**Glazed Feelings**

**Part 50**

**Rizzoli and Isles are the property of TNT and Tess Gerritson. I am just borrowing them for your entertainment. Enjoy and please review your humble bard, Deanlu!**

"Terry and Tony Jordan." Jane whispered as she studied the interviews Aine's department had done. They had been married just recently. Both were hardworking, well off, and passionate women. Jane shook her head letting stray thoughts grab her for a moment thinking of Maura and her. She quickly banished the thoughts flipping the page on the interview. Three of the interviews bothered her greatly. One was the statement taken from the father. It was clear to Jane in the statement he wasn't happy with his daughter's choice for gender reassignment, though he was attempting to have a balanced view. But two statements in particular that he made had Jane gritting her teeth. The first had been when Aine asked the father if he knew of anyone who would have something against his daughter. The father had stated "other than me and the argument we had about her gender reassignment, no one I can think of off-hand." Aine had followed up with good questions to try and see if there was more to it, but continued questioning had produced no more. Jane wasn't so sure and wrote down some questions to have Aine follow up with. The second had been further in the interview when the father had stated that he "could not call Antonia, Tony no matter what." He would rather rip out her heart than call her Tony because it was a mockery of everything her mother and he believed to be right. Jane worried that the father had taken the step to rip out his daughter's heart as she glanced up at the pictures of her wife.

"Damn." Jane groaned shifting trying to find a different position that would allow her more comfort while she read the interviews. Her morning physical therapy combined with pulmonary therapy had worn her out badly. Jane wanted to sleep, but had promised Aine some answers in a day or two. Maura was out getting lunch with Dr. Fontaine. Jane had been left to her own devices, in other words she was supposed to be resting. Jane closed the interview and opened the other that was bothering her. A former girlfriend with a list of previous charges for physical abuse against Terry Jordan before she was married. The former girlfriend had crashed the wedding where a major fight had occurred resulting in the woman being arrested and removed from the property. Strangely, Aine had gotten pictures of the fight from the sister to Terry. She had offered them in the hopes it would help the investigation. Jane shoved the file onto the table closing her eyes as a headache that had been threatening her started to throb harder. Jane stood and walked out onto the back patio. She looked down the beach toward the house that Aine had pointed out from the patio earlier when he had helped Maura and Jane home. She leaned on the railing looking into the distance. None of the doors or windows had been forced, but something seemed off when Jane looked at the front door. On top of it, it seemed to Jane the bodies had been positioned after they had been killed or posed for the benefit of those who found them. Jane saw one of the nearby neighbors who lived here year round on the beach so she decided to take a walk in the late morning sun. She moved down the beach taking her time as her body adjusted to the slower stride and strain of walking. The sand felt warm even as the breeze cooled her.

"Hello? Nice day for a walk." Jane called as she neared the older woman. The woman looked up cautiously and then reached out a hand in greeting.

"Yes, it is. I think we may have rain tonight or tomorrow." She said pointing toward the horizon where clouds were building. Jane looked and then nodded noticing the angry clouds on the horizon. "I'm Imogene Ford nice to meet you…?" Imogene question with her voice and eyes.

"Jane, Jane Rizzoli. My fiancée and I are vacationing over in 1543." Jane said as Imogene nodded. Imogene took a few moments to gauge Jane and then called toward her Irish setter down the beach.

"Harlow, leave the sea gull alone." Imogene yelled toward the setter. Jane watched as Harlow seemed to follow his mistress's words and saunter off in another direction. "You're the Boston Detective who is recuperating here for a few weeks, the one who saved the mayors grandson?" Imogene asked eyeing Jane steadily. Jane wrapped her arms around herself and nodded even as she blushed slightly.

"Yeah, that's me." Jane said not realizing how fast rumors spread in small towns.

"Come on, I have a cup of coffee on the lower patio and Harlow will follow us." Imogene said as Jane glanced back toward her vacation house. "You fiancé should be able to see us from there. She's keeping you on a short leash I noticed?" Imogene stated as Jane walked with her back to the lower beach patio.

"I seem to find myself in troubled situations to warrant it a lot of the time." Jane said as she took a seat in a comfortable Delta patio chair. Imogene poured coffee for them both and offered Jane a biscuit. Imogene snickered.

"I bet. You're job doesn't promote an easy life. She must be someone special to be able to love a detective." Imogene said as she took a sip of her coffee. Jane looked at the older women. She was in her late sixties, blonde grey hair that was kissed by the sun, Nordic features combined with a strong body for her age which suggested she kept herself in shape and actively involved in the community. Imogene's blue eyes though were like a hawk studying her, scrutinizing her movements and expressions much like Maura did when she was working with the facial recognition program. Jane felt somewhat cornered for a moment until Imogene turned toward Harlow's barking.

"She's very special. I…I would do anything for her." Jane said softly looking toward Harlow now as she saw a two figures walking down the beach. It was two young children picking seashells from the surf.

"That kind of love is unique, protect it aggressively Jane. It comes along for very few people in this life." Imogene articulated strongly to Jane, then she smiled. "Now I believe you came here for another reason." Jane nodded.

"The couple that were murdered down the beach here what can you tell me about it?" Jane asked as she watched a slight quiver take Imogene's hand and her face pale. "I didn't mean to upset you Imogene." Jane said as Harlow returned to Imogene's side noting her distress. Imogene took a deep breath and began petting Harlow. It was several minutes before Imogene spoke.

"They were a nice couple. I met them several times out here walking along the beach. They were very much in love Jane. I just couldn't believe someone would do this in our community. We just don't have these type of things happen here. Break in's, small thefts, and even some shoplifting, but this type of crime has never touched us like this before. It is pure evil." Imogene said as she took another sip of her coffee.

"Imogene, is there any way into the house without a key?" Jane asked now. Imogene shook her head.

"No, all the houses require them along here." Imogene said softly. Jane looked off into the distance thinking.

"Are there spare keys to the house the couple were killed in Imogene?" Jane asked again focusing on the older woman. Something about Imogene put her at ease, reminded her in ways of Maura. Maybe it was the intellect behind the eyes or maybe it was the way her eyes studied and digested everything it saw.

"Yes, there are spare keys. One is always left in a secret place near the front door of the beach house. The realtor would have one, the maid that cleans, and one for a conservator." Imogene said as she watched Jane focus on the Atlantic tide.

"Did the police know this when they were investigating?" Jane asked making a mental note that it hadn't been mentioned anywhere in the case notes. Imogene looked over at Jane pouring her another cup of coffee. Jane added some sugar this time with some cream. Her stomach wasn't tolerating the coffee quite as well as it normally would.

"Most of the officers know there are spare keys for each of the vacation rentals." Imogene said as she noticed a very beautiful woman moving toward the patio from the beach. "I believe your fiancée has come looking for you." Imogene said nodding toward the beach. Jane noticed Maura approaching with a worried, but leisurely pace.

"Imogene, could I talk with you tomorrow again?" Jane asked setting her coffee cup down. Imogene smiled warmly reaching across to take Jane's hand.

"I would love the company. I do not have enough visits to my home these days." Imogene said softly. Jane squeezed her hand and stood up scared she had angered Maura. She was pleasantly surprised when Maura wrapped her arms around Jane and kissed her softly on the cheek.

"I missed you. I was a little worried when I didn't find you home." Maura said softly in Jane's ear. Jane smiled as her heart warmed to Maura's words. Jane hugged Maura. They both turned to face Imogene.

"Imogene, this is my fiancée Maura Isles. Maura, this is Imogene Ford." Jane said introducing the two women to each other. The woman shook hands and Imogene was smiling widely.

"Your mother wouldn't be the famous artist and art history professor Constance Isles?" Imogene asked excitedly. Maura was momentarily stunned, but then smiled.

"Yes, she is Imogene. How do you know my mother?" Maura asked watching as Jane rolled her eyes a little. Imogene chuckled catching Jane's eye roll.

"I once caught a lecture on Baroque painting she offered to the public at University of Massachusetts Boston. She showed a series of paintings by Peter Paul Rubens at the Luxemburg Palace. I will never forget how she described the exaggerate lighting, intense emotions, and release from restraint the painters used to bring forth the counter-reformation to reaffirm that emotional and spiritual bond within the monarchy and church." Imogene said with a passion Jane had rarely seen in others. "She is truly an amazing woman. It must be the same with you as Jane has spoke of you the same." Imogene said with a twinkle of mischief in her eye. Maura again was caught off guard as she turned to find Jane blushing slightly. Jane looked around not meeting Maura's eyes. Suddenly, she knelt to pet Harlow.

"I believe Imogene you would find the same within Jane. I hate to end this interesting conversation, but Jane needs her lunch." Maura said smiling and shaking Imogene's hand. "I look forward to talking with you some more. Perhaps we could have lunch together in the coming days as we will be staying for another week and a half." Maura said as she released Imogene's hand and Jane rose from where she was petting Harlow.

"I look forward to it. Good Afternoon." Imogene said as she watched the couple walk away arm in arm. Imogene waited for a while watching them enter into their home. She called Harlow and carried in the dishes. She then went to a nearby phone and dialed a number. "Hello, I just wanted you to know the Boston detective is snooping around in the case." Imogene listened for a while to the response from the person on the other line. "I do not think you are taking this as seriously as you should. The detective may be recouperating, but she can still be an impediment." Imogene listened to the speaker on the line. She sighed and shook her head. "I don't agree with you, but I will keep an eye on her. I will let you know if you need to interfere as it were." Imogene nodded and then hung up. She looked down at Harlow. "Well Harlow, seems our good detective needs to be watched. I really hate when we need to do these things." Imogene rubbed Harlow's head and went down the hall to the study. She stepped behind the desk and pulled open a drawer. She pulled out the Glock hidden within the drawer. Carefully, but with a practiced hand she checked the magazine making sure it was fully loaded. "Jane, Jane. I hope you don't stick your nose in too deep. I would hate to see Maura lose her partner."


	51. Chapter 51

**Glazed Feelings **

**Part 51**

**Rizzoli and Isles are the property of TNT and Tess Gerritson. I am just borrowing them for a little entertainment. I am writing after two days of wondering what the writers of Rizzoli and Isles were thinking with the last episode. It obviously was done on short time basis. It should have been a two parter. Oh well, we will deal with it.**

"So, what were you chatting about with Imogene besides me?" Maura asked as she hugged Jane and leaned into her walking back to the beach house. Jane smiled turning her head to the side to give her a better view of Maura. She kissed the top of the doctor's head.

"Did you know there are at least five possible keys for the beach house where the two women were murdered?" Jane asked as Maura listened. Maura's head rose as she looked at Jane.

"That's a lot of keys running around. Did Imogene tell you that?" Maura asked looking at Jane quizzically. Jane nodded.

"Did you know also the body was moved and posed?" Maura looked at Jane stopping her.

"Why would someone pose the body? Why move it? They were killed in the house." Maura said wondering what Jane was getting too.

"No, only one was killed in the house. Terry was killed in the house. Tony wasn't. I am pretty sure about it after studying the crime scene pictures." Jane said sternly. She reached forward at Maura's questioning gaze cupping her chin softly. "I think there is more to this then Aine can figure out. I think they should have called in the state police to check this out. I am not sure why it has been kept quiet Maura. I think there may be something more though." Jane pulled Maura closer caressing the side of her face with her other hand. "I need to see this through. I won't do anything to endanger me, but I need to sift through the evidence. I need your help. I can't do this alone." Jane looked deeply into Maura's eyes finding fear, but also a deep understanding. "I don't want to do it alone. I need you." Jane said softly kissing Maura's lips. Maura broke the kiss and leaned her forehead against Jane's.

"I worry. I won't say I don't Jane. You tend to act before you think, but you have made a lot of changes over the last few months. I trust you. I will work with you on this on one condition. You keep Aine as your backup. You have to be there for me Jane. I don't want to live this life without you." Maura said lifting her head. Jane nodded in understanding. "So what first, oh mighty Investigator?" Maura asked as Jane pulled Maura to her just absorbing her warmth and smell.

"First, lunch. Then a short nap and maybe I can talk you into a massage since I am a little sore from PT this morning. Then I wonder if tomorrow you could go back over the body?" Jane asked Maura. Maura nodded, thinking about what she would need to do.

"All right, I can do that. Do you want me to go over the crime scene photos with you too?" Maura asked noticing Jane was tired from her pinched brow and shaking hands which she was trying to hide wrapped around Maura's waist. Maura grasped Jane more firmly without letting the detective know she sensed her weakness and began walking them back down the beach. "I brought back some clam chowder, and fish and chips for us. Let's have lunch and take a nap Jane. We can think about the case more later." Jane nodded feeling very weary suddenly. She hated how her energy came and went, but Maura had assured her it was her body healing from the entire trauma. Jane was actually doing better than most patients who normally regressed at this point some from the emotional trauma. The detective had been forced to deal with a great amount of hidden strain she had been under. It could only get better from this point on Maura knew.

"Where's Dr. Reynolds?" Jane asked as they entered the beach house. She noticed the table set for two with a salad, and fruit. The fish and chips, and chowder were probably in the kitchen she assumed. Maura pulled Jane back to her and kissed her deeply.

"Dr. Reynolds has left for Boston. It seems she has several patients who are more important right now one being your mother who has set up session with her." Maura said softly watching Jane's eyes shadow and something run across them in thought before the detective tucked it away. "Don't." Maura whispered to Jane causing her to look up into the green clear eyes that reminded her of a meadow in summer. Jane held those eyes until finally a soft breath expelled as her eyes fluttered shut. The medical examiner placed her hands gently on both sides of Jane's face. "Don't hide it away. Don't worry on it. She will come around eventually. She loves you Jane." Maura said softly kissing each of the detective's eyelids. Jane nodded taking a deep breath and resetting her feelings. When she opened her eyes they were clear the chocolate brown shown through with no shadows.

"I love you Maura. Thank you." Jane said as she kissed Maura and they went about eating lunch. Hours later after a filling lunch, followed by the massage Jane has asked for which led to a round of gentle lovemaking Maura stared down as her lover. Jane was spread across the bed in all her glory the sheet dipping perfectly across the detective's body showing off her finer attributes in Maura's mind. She ran her fingers over Jane's strong shoulders and down her spine. God, how she loved this woman. Maura thought as she softly kissed the dip along Jane's waist before extricating herself carefully from the good detective. Maura walked out of the bedroom, silently closing the door to allow Jane the rest her body needed. She walked over to the criminal folders and began her perusal. Just looking over the scene, she could see what Jane had found. Terry had died in the house, but it was obvious that while there was blood from Tony in the house the amount was too little for him to have been killed there. Jane was right. The question was why had Aine not caught it? Maura pulled her cell phone out and made a call to the pathologist who had done the exam.

"Dr. Reddig, this is Dr. Isles. I was wondering if we could go over the bodies of Terry and Tony Jordan." Maura asked.

"I would love it Dr. Isles. It would be nice to have a second opinion. I am stymied as to what else there is on the bodies to find. I really could use your expertise." Dr. Reddig replied thanking God someone cared about these two women more than the present investigators. He had gotten the opinion from Aine that someone was trying to mess the investigation up.

"Good, I will be by at eight in the morning. May I bring breakfast and coffee?" Maura asked.

'"That would be lovely Dr. Isles. I will see you in the morning." Dr. Reddig said with joy. Maura smiled as the pathologist's response.

"See you then, goodbye." Maura said as she hung up. The sun had advanced across the horizon and now night was falling. Maura began to put away the files until she noticed something in one of the pictures. She grabbed the picture bringing it closer attempting to make out what it was exactly on the right side of the bed, just almost out of view was a small piece of something. It looked metallic. Maura pulled the evidence list and began reading through the list. She did not find the object listed. She walked into the kitchen and opened a drawer off to one side of the sink. The medical examiner pulled a magnifying glass out from the drawer. It was a child's and must have been left by the previous tenants. Maura went back to the table, picked up the picture and began to examine it. A slight shiver went down her spine as Maura stared at the object that appeared to be a scalpel or at least a piece of one. Suddenly images of Hoyt overwhelmed her and the prison hospital the smell of his breath, Jane's screaming, the feel of the tazer and then the dreaded numbness. Maura fought it though, pushed down the memories. "He's dead. He can't harm us anymore." Maura whispered placing the picture back into the folder. She purposely turned and walked down the hallway. Carefully she opened the door to the bedroom, removed her robe, and then slid under the sheet where Jane lay craving the connection with her lover. Chilled flesh came into contact with warm flesh as Maura wrapped herself around Jane. Jane rolled into Maura her face coming to rest in the nook below her chin.

"You're chilled Maura." Jane said in her sleepy voice as she listened to Maura's heartbeat, a rapid staccato. Jane's eyes opened when there was no response. "Hey, what's wrong?" Jane asked as she raised her head to see Maura's anxious eyes. Jane's heart rate kicked up as she pulled Maura closer. "Maura, what's wrong?" She asked firmly now all traces of sleep were gone. Maura took a shuddering breath.

"Bad memories combined with something I found in one of the pictures." Maura said getting her panicky heart under control. Jane caressed the side of her good doctor's face.

"Tell me?" She whispered. Maura hugged Jane tight and then let go.

"In one of pictures next to the right side of the bed back far underneath the camera's flash caught a glint of steel." Maura said as Jane wrapped the ME in her arms a little tighter attempting to banish the demons. "It looks like a scalpel." Maura said with little more courage than she felt. Jane's stunned wide eyes stared back at her.

"Show me." Jane said and rose quickly out of the bed, grabbing a Boston PD t-shirt and workout shorts. Maura followed. Jane had pulled the pictures out looking through them. Maura grabbed the one she had been looking at and pointed out what she saw in the picture.

"I could be wrong Jane. It's not listed on the evidence list." Jane grabbed the evidence list next looking through it. She then grabbed the autopsy report skimming through until she came to what she was looking for at the bottom of page two. Dr. Reddig's type written report what Maura had seen "wounds consistent with a scalpel like object." Jane sat down hard in the nearby chair.

"You're not." Jane said as she handed the autopsy report to Maura. Jane leaned forward even as her body screamed in protest from her healing ribs. Practiced hands ran through her hair as she stared into space trying to think. She was silent as Maura read the autopsy report. Several things occurred to her. One, this was not Hoyt so she needed to get herself under control. The whole setup was not even like Hoyt. Second, Hoyt was dead. She had killed him sending him to the depths of Hell where she prayed he burned for eternity. Third, this wasn't the first crime since Hoyt that she had been on where the suspect had used scalpels. So why was this effecting her so when Maura had said something? Jane looked up at Maura as she sat down instantly recognizing where all the fear had come from. "I didn't realize when I asked for your help that it could endanger you. I think maybe, we need to rethink this Maura. I don't want you endangered. I don't think…" Maura cut Jane off quickly seeing where this was heading.

"Jane, we have talked about this before. I work in the BPD. It wouldn't be the first time my life was endangered. How many near misses has there been Jane? A lot, I won't change my job because it becomes dangerous. I love what I do. I love what you do, though it scares me at times. We are just consulting. There are no bullets flying, cars heading toward us, or buildings on fire. We just tell Aine what we think and then step back from it. Aine has to choose what to do." Maura said reaching out and holding the detective's hand. Jane slid forward kneeling in front of Maura pulling her down into a slow kiss.

"All right, however, any sign of danger and we head back to Boston with protection. I won't risk you." Jane said quietly. Gentle rumbling from thunder outside reached the two women's ears almost as if foreshadowing what was to come.

"Now, if you could just take those same instructions on yourself I would worry so much less Jane." Maura said softly smiling at her love. Jane cracked a smile.

"Wishes can come true Dr. Isles." Jane said chuckling. Maura kissed the top of Jane's head and hugged her close, the earlier fear now forgotten. "Okay, let me write up my report for Aine so he can start working on some things. I am going to ask Aine to take me to the beach house to see the scene myself. I want to have you with and see if we can find something more. Will Tomorrow be okay?" Jane asked Maura. The doctor shook her head no.

"I will be going over the bodies with Dr. Reddig tomorrow. Not to mention you have two sessions of PT tomorrow, and an appointment with the pulmonologist." Maura responded even as Jane grimaced. Maura chuckled at the pout that showed up on Jane's lips. The doctor quickly grabbed the bottom lip with her teeth pulling it into her mouth ending off with a searing kiss. When they separated Jane's face looked blissfully happy. "Come on, let's get dressed and make dinner. Then let's see about a walk on the beach. I kind of like the slow evenings with you." Jane smiled thinking the same thing. Outside Imogene walked Harlow watching Jane and Maura's beach house.


	52. Chapter 52

**Glazed Feelings **

**Part 52**

**Rizzoli and Isles are the property of TNT and Tess Gerritson. I am just borrowing them for some major fun! Hope you are enjoying. I have one last week off from school and then I start teaching again. Let's see what chaos I can instill in ya all! Detente's is an actual restaurant in Martha's Vineyard. I had taken liberty with its location and some items on the menu. Your humble bard, Deanlu.**

"So, it's like this…" Aine listened to Jane's covering of the new details that she had found. When she was done he just sat there shaking his head along with the two other officers' from the precinct. "I think your best plan of action would be to reinterview these two people and maybe the sister."

"Why the sister?" Albert asked, one of the investigators. Jane turned toward him studying the older gentlemen. Jane liked him as he reminded her of Korsak. Time though had etched deeply into his face the scenes of crimes and violence as it did with all officers. There were things she would love to ask him if they ever had time to just sit and talk.

"It's awful fishy she had all those pictures of the fight for you ready to hand over. Strangely, she didn't offer the video of the wedding. I would see if you could get the uncut version from the photographer. They always keep all the footage just in case. Also I noted here in several interviews with other family members and friends that they reiterate over and over that she hated the fact her sister was gay. In fact, three months prior there had been a major argument between the two. Suddenly afterwards the sister is all sweet and ingratiating. I also noted the father had joined in that argument too. No one would talk about what the argument was about though. I would also reinterview the father and ask these questions." Jane slid a list of questions over for each of the suspects. "Maura is going over the body and should have some more details for you this afternoon. Aine, I would like to see the house too. Is it possible to go over the scene of the crime?" Jane asked as she looked at Aine. Aine looked toward Albert and nodded. This was more than they had since the crime was committed.

"Yeah, we can get you in there. The house is set for cleaning next week Jane. So if we need to find anything it has to be this week. It's still sealed for the investigation, but that comes down on Monday. I went back over the evidence and the statements. I am worried about a couple of things there too. Especially with the sister and the father something is not right with some of their statements. The nutter girlfriend though was locked up after the wedding and not released. She couldn't have done it. So I think we need to start looking at the sister or the father, Jane. I will double check everything with the ex-girlfriend though." Aine said noticing Jane glance toward the doors and back at him. Aine knew she was looking for Maura. He had picked her up from the hospital this morning after her physical therapy and pulmonologist appointment. She had been a little surly, but overall seemed fine.

"Okay, why don't we go later this afternoon I really want Maura with me as she is good with noticing things. Anywhere I can get something to eat?" Jane asked Aine and Albert. The investigators were more than willing to go over the house another time. The items Jane had pointed out were definitely going to help in the investigation now if they could get the mayor off their back. He had taken an inordinate interest in the case and even suggested having Rizzoli use her talents to help the department out.

" Yeah there is a little restaurant down the street. It serves seafood and is casual for lunch.. That be okay?" Jane nodded as she pulled her phone out. She texted Maura quickly letting her know they would be going to lunch. Maura didn't answer so Jane assumed she was busy with the autopsy.

"Yeah, can you give me a minute?" Jane asked as Aine nodded. Jane carefully rose from her chair she had been sitting in. Her ribs were aching from the hard backed chair and stretching wasn't an option with them fractured. Jane walked out into the hallway from the offices where Aine and his fellow officers were investigating the crime. She followed the hall for a while and then turned left until she arrived at the doors of the morgue. She entered the outer office area placed booties, gloves, and a gown on. She tied back her hair and then entered into the autopsy bay. Maura was just finishing on Terry and had Tony brought from refrigeration. She was making some final notes while Dr. Reddig nodded and answered a few questions. Jane just stood for a while inside the doors observing. Maura and Dr. Reddig were so intent that they had not heard her entry. Jane would never tell Maura, but she adored this side of her love. She found it extremely sexy and arousing. Maura was in her all her glory as medical examiner. Jane couldn't count the number of times she had stood just out of Maura's line of site and watched her work. Jane loved Maura physically, but Jane loved her partner intellectually too. Maura's knowledge and skill had been invaluable to Jane over the years. They had allowed her to understand and make theories that she would never have the courage to bounce off Frost and Korsak due to the political ramifications. Maura never cared about those ramifications. No, that wasn't quite right. Maura allowed her to run with her theories, but gave her the gentle nudge of caution and the ability to walk through the political mind fields. Maura's intellectual discussions kept Jane on her toes. The detective constantly found herself googling the medical examiner's latest fact to read more in depth of it not to mention Jane loved knowing that her girlfriend could intellectually match wits with her and the best the world had to offer. Perhaps too, there was a little ego involved knowing that when they both walked into a room all heads turned, but Maura only had eyes for her. A little grin broke Jane's face as she realized that she had become a better person because of Maura.

"Jane?" Maura was standing in front of the detective with a concerned look on her face. Jane realized she had been so lost in thought that Maura must have called to her several times before walking over. "Are you okay?" Maura asked as gentle hands framed Jane's face gauging her attempting to find any weakness or illness. Jane nodded.

"Sorry, deep in thought. Did you find anything?" Jane asked even as Maura continued to stare for a few moments. Her look told Jane she was not letting this go and they would be talking about this later. Jane gently squeezed the medical examiners hand reassuring her.

"Yes, a couple of things. First, it was a scalpel that made the cuts to the body. A small piece broke off in one of Terry's wounds. We have sent it to be identified. Next, Terry was drugged. Most likely before she was stabbed and beaten. We are running tests now for the drugs. Hopefully, we will find out what type of drug." Maura said as Jane looked up.

"How did this get missed in the first autopsy?" Jane asked looking at Dr. Reddig.

"I was thorough as I could be, but Dr. Isles here is a little more studious than I. She was looking for it." Dr. Reddig stated looking ashamed. Maura interrupted.

"No. You did fine Dr. Reddig." She said looking at the man and assuaging his embarrassment. Maura then showed Jane Terry's neck. "It's very hard to see due to the small gauge of the needle." Jane peered down as Maura held a magnifying glass to the spot.

"Dr. Reddig said you were looking for it. What did he mean?" Jane asked now watching as Maura paled a little and turned away toward the sinks to the side of the autopsy bay. Jane motioned to Dr. Reddig to give them a moment. The doctor made himself scarce. Jane moved up behind Maura wrapping her arms around her. The doctor was quiet for a while as she calmed and situated her thoughts.

"When Hoyt and Peter grabbed you they both injected you in the neck. When I was looking at the photo's the other night and reading the autopsy reports I knew Tony would had fought hard to stop whoever attacked them. My question came as to why Terry didn't have any defensive wounds? The attacks by Hoyt and Peter came to mind. So I looked for the needle marks." Maura said as shivers began to pass through her body at the thought of Jane helpless. Jane kissed her softly on the neck pulling her back into her arms more deeply and hugging her tightly.

"I love you for being so strong. You are one of the strongest people I know Maura. You so amaze me." Jane whispered into Maura's ear. The medical examiner turned in Jane's arms and hugged her tightly. "Come on, time for a break. Let's have lunch before you start on Tony. Okay?" Maura nodded into Jane's shoulder. Jane hugged her again laying a kiss on her forehead. "Come on." Maura moved out of Jane's arms removing the scrubs and depositing them in the nearby receptacle. Meanwhile, Jane texted Aine for directions and to tell him she needed time alone with Maura. Maura then let Dr. Reddig know they were going to lunch. Jane walked with Maura arm in arm to the nearby restaurant. Détente' had been a new place that opened up two summers ago. It was doing well. Jane watched as the warmth of the sun brought the color back into Maura's cheeks. Hoyt and Peter were as much a nightmare for her as they were for Jane, but aspects of this case were making their presence felt more than usual. The waiter came to their table and for once Jane did the ordering.

"Bring us a bottle of NV Duval-Leroy, Brut, Champagne, France, the Belgian Endive and Treviso, the blue lump crab stuffed squid, and the Ornamental and traditional sliced tomatoes with mozzarella." Jane said as the waiter rushed away to place their appetizers and drinks. Maura had avoided Jane's eyes looking out at the nearby water. Kids were playing in the nearby surf with their parents sunning themselves or reading on the beach. The sound of seagulls and an errant bark from a dog running with its mistress along the shore echoed back toward the restaurant even as sailboats and yacht's cruised the waters out farther. Jane had meant lunch to be a quick affair to get Maura back to work, but seeing how the latest information had stirred the medical examiner up inside made the detective change tactics. Maura took a deep breath and turned to Jane.

"Sorry, I didn't think it would bother me so much. Just…I wanted this time to be for you to recuperate and not deal with any cases. Life doesn't seem to let us alone enough so we can spend it together." Jane reached across the table as Maura spoke taking her fiancée's hand. "I'm with you Jane. Don't worry. It's just Hoyt haunts me too. He knew we were a couple before we knew it. I want what Terry and Tony were going to have. I want it with you, but sometimes cases like this scare me. They remind me how much hate is out there for same sex marriages." Maura said looking at Jane. Jane smiled one of those brilliant smiles that Maura loved attempting to reassure her lover and fiancée.

"We're almost done with the case. All you have to do is finish up with Tony. Then we look at the house and it's done. Aine and his officers take it from there. I can't remove your fears about how others see us Maura. You know it is why it took me so long to have courage to commit to you. I never wanted you to be questioned because your partner was a female. I know it can close doors, but you and I both know our parents, friends, even work have been very supportive of us when things could have gone the other way. I will always protect you the best I can and we will face those who don't agree with our life together. We will not die because of some maniac Maura. We will die one day because old age won't let me make love to you anymore, we can't walk, our children have driven us crazy, and our hearts finally just give out. Okay?" Jane said softly as Maura looked into her eyes for confirmation that her words were the truth. Tears of joy ran down Maura's face as she smiled finding what she needed within the one person she loved.

"Alright." Maura said in a gentle sob. The waiter was back with their champagne popping the cork carefully and pouring two glasses. Jane sipped it and nodded her approval. The waiter moved off as Jane raised her glass.

"To us and our future may it be long, full of passion, filled with family and friends, and love." Jane said softly as Maura clinked her glass with Jane.

"I like that…us and our future." Maura said as her eyes twinkled at Jane. Jane smiled feeling the warmth come back into Maura's hand she was covering with her own again. The waiter returned with their appetizers as Jane broached a subject she had been waiting on for a while.

"I have a question to ask you, but I need you to not answer right away. I need you to really think about what I am asking." Jane said with confidence. Maura looked curiously at Jane. "I know I have asked you to marry me again and you have said yes. I have one more small request." Jane said softly as Maura looked on pensively. "I think it's time we not only moved in together, but…Maura I want to get a place of our own something that combines your tastes with mine. I don't think I can handle living alone in my apartment anymore…without you. I can't deal with ma being so close at your house either. I need space with you where I don't have to worry who is coming through the door or how many times I have been attacked there or…." Jane never got to finish as Maura was around the table and hugging the air straight out of her lungs. Suddenly, Maura let go a little remembering Jane's injury, however, she never let go of her lovers lips. It wasn't until there was a clearing of a throat nearby that they finally broke apart. Maura looked up to find Imogene standing behind Jane with a shit eating grin on her face.

"Well, if I had known those type kisses were included in lunch I would have come over right away." Imogene said chuckling softly. Maura blushed as Jane smiled.

"We will talk about this tonight." Maura whispered giving Jane a quick peck and returned to her seat.

"Have a seat Imogene, but kisses are not included." Jane chortled a little. "Those are special order for special people." Jane said winking. Imogene broke out laughing and soon the two ladies joined her. Once the laughing died down Imogene asked Jane a question.

"How is your case going?" Imogene asked as Jane and Maura dug into their food. Jane passed a small plate to Imogene and encouraged her to sample their appetizers.

"Very well actually I think we may have found some significant information for Aine." Jane said not seeing the perplexed look on Imogene's face. "I think they will solve it soon enough now. So how is Harlow?" Jane asked Imogene.

"Harlow is well, though he was a little agitated this morning on his walk when we passed the house where the two girls were killed. Not sure what it was about, but you know how pets are more sensitive to things than we are." Imogene said as she tasted her appetizers. "Do you have plans for this afternoon Jane?" Imogene asked curiously. Maura interrupted Jane before she could answer.

"Jane is being transported home by Aine so she can rest Imogene. I will be at the morgue with Dr. Reddig until this evening." Maura said. Jane was about to argue the point when she saw the hard look from Maura.

"Yeah, I need to take my afternoon healing nap. Why did you have something in mind?" Jane asked looking over at the older women noticing a hint of mischief in her eyes. They were interrupted by the waiter once again. "Another glass for my friend, Imogene and we will have the pan seared Sea Scallops, the pan seared Fluke, and the roasted Casco Bay Cod. Oh, Could you bring me a glass of water with lemon too." The waiter smiled and nodded bustling away.

"Jane, I could have ordered my own lunch." Imogene said softly giving her a tender look. Maura touched Imogene's hand drawing her attention.

"If Jane orders for you enjoy it she doesn't do it often." Maura responded. Imogene nodded looking back at Jane a little troubled. "So Imogene what do you do for a living, if I may ask?" Maura questioned as she enjoyed a sip from her champagne and a bite of her food. Jane had really out done herself this time Maura thought. Earlier thoughts of doom and gloom had been whisked away with the detective's gentle romance and love.

"Well, for the most part I travel and enjoy life now. I do a little writing, little painting, and basically cause havoc on the city council here. I'm sure there are some who wish I would be a loving old grandmother and mind my own business. I, however, have never seen a grandmother mind their own business. Have you Maura?" Imogene asked. Maura blushed remembering Constance's mother coming into her room one day to explain the birds and the bees. It was the most horrendous and embarrassing moment of Maura's life. Constance hadn't been around as she was in Italy doing an installation and an innocent comment about where babies came from had caused her grandmother to come in and explain life. Maura's grandmother had been a nurse.

"Ummm, no I haven't." Maura said choking a little on the champagne. Jane smiled seeing the unsettled doctor and making a note to ask what had caused her to become unsettled.

"What about you Jane? Did you grandmother ever mind her own business?" Imogene asked as the waiter arrived with their entrée's and drinks. A few minutes later Jane finally answered as the women ate their meal.

My Nana never minded her own business, but she never got in your business unless it was very important. She was special." Jane said taking a sample of her Fluke as she thought for a minute. "My ma was always trying to make me into a girly girl. Only when I was at Nana's did I feel free from that pressure. Nana didn't care if I climbed a tree, played baseball, or just sat and read. She said it was only important that I be true to who I was." Jane was silent for a moment as she stared at the woman she loved. "I think I finally got it right." Maura blushed as Jane turned to Imogene. "What about your grandmother Imogene." Imogene looked up astounded at how much emotion Jane could evoke in a few words. The older woman took a drink of her champagne for a moment.

"She was very much like yours Jane, with a little bit of a funny bone." Imogene smiled. "Now as for what I have in mind, if Dr. Isles doesn't mind, is a walk through the farmers market okay? Afterwards I will take you home for your nap." Imogene stated looking toward Maura. Maura thought about it for a moment looking at the two women.

"If I have your promise you won't let her strain herself. She is very much recovering and at a critical stage right now." Maura asked Imogene assessing whether she should trust the two together. Imogene looked at Jane who shrugged innocently.

"I believe I can guarantee that Dr. Isles, though it may be a challenging job


	53. Chapter 53

**Glazed Feelings**

**Part 53**

**Rizzoli and Isles are the property of TNT and Tess Gerritson. I am just borrowing them for a little fun. Believe it or not we are coming to an end with this soon. I have decided to create a new story that follows this one. I hope you all will continue to follow. No I haven't forgotten about FOG. It is still being worked on. So hang in there.**

Imogene and Jane walked among the many different farmers and fisherman's booths offering fresh delights. Lunch had been an interesting affair, but Jane had noticed that Imogene kept checking her phone every once in a while. Jane was curious and wanted to ask what was going on, but wasn't quite ready. Jane had also decided that she was going to make dinner for Maura. It had been a while since she had cooked and she wanted her love to know she was on the road to recovery.

"Why did you want me to come with you to the Farmer's Market Imogene?" Jane asked as she purchased two peppers and two large tomatoes. The woman handed over the produce in a reusable cloth bag with Jane's change. Imogene moved a little off not answering Jane trying to form a response.

"Maybe I just wanted some company. I have many friends Jane, but I wanted to get to know you better." Imogene said coyly looking at Jane with an expression only Maura had given her before. Suddenly, it was gone and the normal friend look had returned. Imogene purchased some Zucchini and yellow squash as Jane purchased a couple bottles of Westport Rivers Chardonnay, a local winery sold at the market.

"I think it is more than that Imogene. You want to tell me why you are so interested in me and in this case?" Jane asked softly moving over to another booth picking up several herbs and half a pound of rice. The sun was warm and the breeze cool allowing the two women to take their time strolling in the market with no problems. Jane had pretty much gather most of the ingredients for the stuffed peppers and tomatoes she would make at the beach house. She would serve them alongside a salad with strawberry shortcake for dessert. She had most of the ingredients at the house. She was growing tired, but the market and the company were preferable to going home alone.

"What makes you think I have any interest in this case?" Imogene said as she motioned to a nearby table where they could get a nice latte from a coffee shop that had set up a tent for customers. Jane ordered a latte with two raw sugars while Imogene asked for the same without the raw sugars. They sat at a nearby table under the shade of tree.

"You know I like you Imogene. I would hate to think I couldn't trust you. We can continue to spar and dance around this or you can tell me why you suddenly want to know so much about what I am doing." Jane said quietly as Imogene looked away for a minute trying to figure out how to keep the detective off the scent of what she was really doing.

"Let's say I care about how the community is seen with these murders. You should know Aine was forced to call you into the investigation. We all knew you were here recuperating Jane. Several of us on the council believe you could solve this case. Aine told us to leave you alone and let you recover. Aine hasn't told you everything at least he doesn't believe what we believe." Imogene said softly looking around to make sure no one had heard them.

"What does he not believe?" Jane asked curiously looking at how Imogene watched to make sure no one heard what they were talking about.

"That the sister is the killer. He doesn't want to believe it because of his connection to the family." Imogene said softly making sure her voice was high enough to be heard by Jane, but not high enough to carry farther. Jane looked at her incredulously not wanting to acknowledge what Imogene had just said.

"Imogene, you have to be kidding me. What makes you think that?" Jane asked carefully as Imogene now focused on her.

"Jane, things are not always as they seem. Aine knew the sister. He was at the wedding. Did he tell you that? The argument was witnessed by him." Imogene said softly watching the detective as the ramifications of what Imogene had revealed started to dawn on her.

"Why hasn't he been removed from the investigation? Why haven't the state police been called in to deal with the murders?" Jane asked suddenly very nervous about where Maura was at that moment. She pulled her phone out texting the doctor quickly as nasty thoughts and connections she hoped weren't true were being made in her mind.

**Jane: Maura where are you?**

"Because the council felt he could do his job without bias. We don't know what his relationship is with the sister. Albert has always been able to keep Aine on the up and up and notify us if there is anything to be worried about. Marston, the other investigator you didn't meet keeps track of them all. He was out of office while you were there today. He knows you're working the case though. However, the state police have been briefly consulted and there are things in place for them to enter the investigation if need be." Imogene said taking a sip of her coffee. Jane's phones beeped with the return text. Jane picked it up and read

**Maura: I am working on Tony. What's wrong?**

**Jane: Is Doctor Reddig there with you?**

**Maura: Yes, why?**

**Jane: Promise me you will have Dr. Reddig stay with you and bring you home. Promise me Maura.**

**Maura: Okay, but Aine offered to drive me to the beach house.**

**Jane: No, just make sure Dr. Reddig brings you home. Please Maura do this for me. I'll explain when you get home.**

**Maura: All right. Promise.**

**Jane: I love u**

**Maura: I love you. See you in a couple of hours.**

"Jane? What's wrong?" Imogene asked. Jane looked up at Imogene as she keyed in Albert's number to her phone.

"Nothing, I want to make sure of some things." Jane said as Albert picked up on the other end. "Albert, this is detective Rizzoli. I need you to check on some things, but not tell Aine you are doing it. One, the sister we need to find out what she does for a living. Second, I need you to get the video from the photographer. Not Aine. I also need you to check into Aine's whereabouts the night of the murders. Third, you cannot say anything to Aine. Is that understood?" She listened as Albert said yes, and then gave her a piece of information she hadn't known about the sister.

"Why?" Jane asked listening to the response Albert gave her. "Okay, find out who she was visiting. All right, report to me what you find and then get back in touch."

"Jane? What's going on?" Imogene asked seeing the frightened look on Jane's face. Jane sat for a while thinking, not saying anything. If Aine was involved, though she hoped he wasn't, it would explain why the investigation had ground to a halt. He could cause minor mistakes which could be hidden and lead the investigation down a blind alley. It wasn't hard to do Jane knew this as she had done it with hiding Maura's identity in relation to Patty Doyle. The overriding questions that needed to be answered were; Is Aine involved with the murder, covering the murderer's trail, or an innocent relation? If Aine was involved then both Maura and she were in danger. Jane had to take the side of caution. She couldn't risk Maura. She looked up at Imogene seeing the older woman patiently waiting for her to answer.

"Terry's sister was staying with someone in town the night of the murders. She was on her own. Aine signed off that she had an alibi for the night of the murders." Jane said nervously now wanting Maura with her where she knew she would be safe.

"Aine would never do something like that Jane. He is a good man. He could never kill someone." Imogene said softly glancing around again while Jane's mind began to turn inside. The more she thought on it the more she wasn't totally sure about her old friend. She wanted to believe he wasn't capable of it, but she had learned in the past that anyone was capable of anything it just depended on the circumstances that pushed them into it.

"Maybe not, but you should never have allowed him to be involved in the investigation. He is too close to it even if he has nothing to do with it. It makes it look like he is covering something up." Jane finished her coffee feeling exhaustion start to push on her body even as her mind ran a mile a minute. "Come on; let's head off to the houses I need to make some phone calls." The ride back to the beach houses was short. Imogene offered to help Jane in with her purchases, but Jane waved her off. Jane waved goodbye to Imogene and then walked up to the front door. It was then she noticed the door was cracked open. Jane's blood began pumping and her heart rate picked up. She knew they had locked the door before they left. Jane set her bags down and reached for her gun which was not there. Jane swore under her breath remembering her gun was safely locked in her gun safe in her apartment where Frankie had put it while she was recovering. She looked around the porch area for anything she could use to defend herself when she noticed a heavy duty broom. She quickly grabbed the broom and texted Albert that the beach house had been broken into. She shut the sound off on the phone, took a deep breath, and entered the beach house.

Slowly she moved through the front entrance holding the broom like a fighting staff prepared for whatever she found. The entire house had been tossed as if someone was looking for something. Jane carefully picked her way through the kitchen and living room quickly finding no one. She moved down the hallway and stopped. She heard the sound of someone going through drawers from the bedroom. Jane took a slow deep breath, shoved the door open to the bedroom, and yelled, "Police, freeze" as she entered. Two steps into the bedroom she realized too late the door hadn't swung all the way open. She turned seeing a shadow out of the corner of her eye when the door swung back hard slamming her into wall. She recovered quickly grabbing the fleeing suspect and struggling with them as they fell to the floor. Jane noticed briefly the suspect had a face mask as she attempted to pin them to the floor. The suspect brought their knee up hard into Jane's gut causing the detective to lose her grip. The masked person then backhanded her hard and got up to run. Jane recovered grabbing a nearby leg once again causing the attacker to fall even as Jane's nails raked over exposed skin. Jane went to pounce on them receiving a full kick to her face causing her to fall to the floor. The perp rose and took off running. Jane could hear the sound of sirens in the background as things went fuzzy and darkness pulled her under. Her last thought was Maura was going to kill her.

Albert and Aine came charging to the front door. Maura was back at the car being held by Dr. Reddig. Both officers entered into the house slowly moving through the chaos of furniture and fixtures. "Police, come out with your hands up." Aine yelled. There was no answer back as his heart began to pump hard. "Jane? Jane, answer!" Still no sound as the two men moved through the house.

"Clear!" Albert called as they moved down the hallway toward the bedrooms. They cleared the guestroom, bathroom, and arrived at the Master bedroom to find Jane unconscious on the floor. Albert moved into the room checking behind the door as Aine kept his gun drawn, but placed a finger on Jane's pulse point at the neck. Blood streamed from the detective's nose and covered her face.

"Clear!" Albert called out again after checking the closet.

"She's alive. Call an ambulance. Get Maura in here." Albert holstered his gun calling for an ambulance. Maura came running inside in a panic falling to her knees in front of Jane.

"Aine, get me a cold wash cloth from the bathroom. Hurry!" Aine moved toward the bathroom to comply with the doctors directions as Jane began to come around. "Jane, don't move please. Hold still."

"Maura?" Jane uttered in confusion. Aine returned and handed the cloth to Maura. The medical examiner wiped the blood away carefully trying to ascertain if Jane was hurt worse than it appeared.

"Aww shit! He got away didn't he?" Jane said closing her eyes as the pain in her face announced another broken nose and an oncoming headache. Jane was embarrassed to say the least. Also in the back of her mind was the concern that if Maura had beat her home her love could have been hurt or worse killed. How could a consult case cause this much trouble?

"Easy, tell me how many fingers you see Jane?" Maura asked holding up two. Jane opened her eyes looking at the doctors fingers.

"Two, I'm fine Maura just not as fast as I use to be. Can I please get up? I feel kind of stupid laying here." Jane declared softly seeing the worry in Maura's face. Jane had caused her so much of it lately. Even on vacation there was no relief it seemed. Jane knew this was her fault totally. She had involved them in the case. She had put them in danger. She was at fault for causing Maura the worry and pain she now saw in the woman's face. She should have waited until backup arrived.

"Yeah, but I am going to need to put your nose back into place." Maura spoke softly.

"Wait, I need you to take samples from my under my fingers. I scratched my attacker. Hopefully we will get lucky." Jane whispered. Albert halted Maura as she moved to retrieve a crime scene kit, whispering he would get the kit. Maura held Jane's face examining her eyes noticing the slight glazed look.

"Jane, you with me still?" Maura asked concerned, but keeping a tight rein on her emotions right then.

"Yeah, just really tired it's been a long day." The detective responded even as she attempted to figure out what the perp was looking for in the beach house. Albert returned with an evidence kit.

"You know Jane until you started looking at the case we were going to resign it to a cold case. Everything we looked into on it didn't pan out. Now you have been on the case less than two days and suddenly we have new questions, more physical evidence, and an attack on you. Do you attract trouble?" Albert asked as Maura began taking evidence from her under her fingers. She then took samples of several fibers on Jane's clothes. She let Jane rise even as the paramedics entered the room.

"Some would say I do." Jane declared as she regarded Maura's even look. Albert nodded even as Maura stepped aside while the paramedics checked over the detective and then helped her out to the ambulance. While at the ambulance Maura popped Jane's nose into place watching as the woman squinted and closed her eyes from the pain. Several tears rolled down Jane's cheeks from the pain as she listened to the paramedics.

"We recommend you be seen at the hospital to make sure everything is okay Ms. Rizzoli." The dark brown haired medic said.

"It's Detective Rizzoli. No, I am going to stay home. I am fine. It's just a bump and a broken nose. Ice, rest, and Maura will make it better." Jane said firmly. Maura was about to argue, but Jane's glare told her not too. Jane signed the AMA forms and then marched off toward the house. Maura turned away from the house for a moment and took a deep breath. She squared her shoulders as she felt Aine come up behind her.

"They were looking for something. We need you to come inside and see if anything is missing. We have taken pictures. We are going to get Jane's statement and then help you all get the house together again, unless you want to be somewhere else tonight. We told the rental company about the break-in and a locksmith is on the way out to change all the locks. An officer will be here to monitor the house twenty four hours." Aine said as Maura turned to listen. "I will make sure you all are safe Maura. I promise I will not let anything happen to Jane" Maura looked over at the muscular man that Jane called friend and shook her head.

"Aine, if there is anything I have learned since being with Jane it's that no matter how much protection you put out there the bad guys always find a way to get her." Maura stepped closer to Aine and pointed at him her finger striking his chest repeatedly in emphases. "NOT…THIS…TIME! We look at the other house Aine and we are done. I will not let her get hurt like this again. Not right now. Do you understand me Aine? Do you? I blame you for this and I will hold you accountable if anything happens to her. Do you understand?" Maura said in no uncertain terms the anger and fear flaring in her eyes.

"Yes, Dr. Isles. I understand." Aine said as he watched her push past him toward the house. Aine hung his head knowing he was to blame for bringing Jane into this investigation. Marston came walking up as the ambulance pulled away.

"Everything okay Aine?" Marston asked carefully. Aine shook his head.

"Detective Rizzoli interrupted a home invasion. She was injured though it is minor. The house has been tossed as if they were looking for something. The case notes for the investigation we gave Jane have been gone through though nothing is missing." Aine responded as he looked toward the house where Maura disappeared.

"Why would they come into their house? We just asked them to look over the case files. No one knows about this. There is no way they should have even had anything like this happen unless one of the council or the mayor is involved. Maybe we are missing something we should have seen." Marston contemplated suddenly. Aine scrutinized the detective for a minute. "Maybe we haven't thought this all out completely. The sister and father both own homes here. You know the sister Aine, is she capable of something like this?" Marston asked the officer.

"I would have told you no, but now I am not so sure. I tried to visit with her the other day. No one was home and she hasn't returned my calls. Something weird is going on here. Marston, we need to have Jane and Maura look at the house and then make it known they are no longer involved with the investigation." Aine pronounced emphatically. "I do not want my friend hurt anymore. She is suppose to be recovering from a kidnapping and physical abuse suffered due to it. The council was wrong to force me to approach her with this at all." Marston nodded in agreement, but it had caused things to start moving on the case.

"I know. However, we found out today the father was gone for two days and no one knows where he was at the time. Those two days just happen to coincide with the murders. Also the sister's whereabouts during the murders are shady." Marston said as Aine looked up sharply at him.

"I told you she wasn't involved. I can vouch for her." Aine said harshly. Marston's face hardened now.

"That's not good enough now officer. You will bring in the father and the sister immediately. They will give a full accounting of their whereabouts or they will be locked up. You as well Aine will give a full accounting of your whereabouts during the time of the murders and a list of witnesses who can vouch for you. Do you understand me Aine?" Marston declared angrily. Aine tried to attempt the anger to avoid the situation, but he knew he could not. Aine suddenly deflated and nodded. Marston signaled two officers off to the side. Aine followed the two men back to a patrol car. Marston now watched as the headed back to the station where Aine's statement would be taken. He hoped to God Aine wasn't involved as he turned and walked into the house. Albert sat at the breakfast counter where Jane sipped juice and was giving her statement.

"Any impressions you got from your attacker?" Albert asked as Marston noticed the statement had been written out concisely in Jane's hand. Jane closed her eyes for a minute as she replayed her entry into the house and the fight with the attacker.

"Yeah, I don't think it was a man. At least that's the impression I have after fighting with them. Don't get me wrong the person was strong and agile, but there was something about the feel…"Jane closed her eyes again as Maura entered the kitchen area behind her. She gently wrapped her arms around Jane's waist and held her. Jane's eyes snapped open. "It was a woman. When I grabbed her legs and was struggling with her I felt it was a woman." Jane turned to look at Maura even while the doctor kept a hold on her. "It was like when we wrestle together. I can always tell the difference between wrestling with the guys at work and with you. There's a difference in body language." Jane said suddenly turning back to Detective's Albert and Marston. "It was definitely a woman." Albert nodded writing down Jane's information.

"Anything taken?" Marston asked Dr. Isles. Maura nodded and held tighter to Jane.

"Two scalpels from the doctor's bag I always carry with me. Also a needle and syringe and a sedative that was sent along for Jane if there should be need." Maura stated as she felt Jane jerk below her hold. Albert made some notes quickly and took the name of the sedative. "I want to look at the house tonight and then Jane and I are done with this case. We will leave not tomorrow, but the day after. I will not have her harmed." Maura felt Jane's muscles tense, but the detective said nothing.

"All right. Jane? Do you feel up to looking at the beach house now? We have a few hours of daylight left. I don't think there is much to see, we went over it thoroughly. Oh, the scalpel piece next to the night stand was noted and gathered as evidence. It was found in some notes that hadn't been copied for you." Marston stated as he moved to sit down. Jane looked over at Maura seeing the determined look in her eyes. She knew they had a lot to talk about.

Outside, in a spot where no would notice a parked car due to the obstructed view from the road a young woman rushed to remove her clothing. Elizabeth Jordan removed the mask, gloves, and dark top she wore placing them in a duffle bag. She removed her black pants and the shoes replacing them with a swimsuit, beach wrap skirt, and light top. She donned a wide brim beach hat and pair of sun glasses. She looked down at the three scratches that wrapped from her shin to her calf.

"Damn, I am going to have to take care of that detective. She is getting too close." The young woman said angrily after Aine had told her they would be calling her in to answer more questions soon. Then a thought occurred to her. Elizabeth grabbed her phone and made a call.

"Hello?" the voice answered.

"Imogene, it's Elizabeth Jordan, Tony's sister, I was wondering if you had time for me tomorrow to talk." Elizabeth said happily attempting to deceive Imogene while attaining some information.

"Elizabeth, you know I have nothing planned tomorrow, except my evening mahjongg games with the ladies club. I would love to talk with you. Is it okay if I serve tea during your visit?" Imogene said masking her concern for the sister's call. She knew that Elizabeth was who they all suspected. There was never anything outward they could say that lent to these suspicions, but it was a feeling you got off the woman.

"Yes, around ten if it's okay. I have something to take care of right before that. I'll call if I get delayed." Elizabeth stated as the corner of her lips turned into an evil smirk. "By the way, I heard over the police scanner there was a break in one of the beach houses near you. Is everything okay down there? I hope this hasn't anything to do with my sister and her fiancée's murder. I just don't know what this town is coming too these days."

"I hadn't heard that, but I will check it out. Thank you for letting me know. I'm sure this is just one of the normal break in's we have in the beginning of the season. I know how you worry they will never find your sister and her fiancées murderer. They will get them Elizabeth. I'll see you tomorrow." Imogene declared while watching Jane, Maura, and the detectives from the local police department head down the road toward the house where the Terry and Tony Jordan had been killed.

"Okay, be safe and keep your doors locked Imogene. Goodnight." Elizabeth said and then rang off. "Bitch, she knows more than she is saying. Elizabeth watched from where she was as the car with the detectives pulled up to the beach house where her sister and her slut had been killed. "I need to remove those two once and for all. They're no better than my sister and her little slut." She looked back in the duffle. "Hmmm, well I'll just have to remove this little problem from my daddy's life too." Elizabeth pulled the syringe and sedative from the pocket of her black pants. Then she removed the two scalpels with their protective covers in place. "Yes, I can do this just like I did Terry." Elizabeth watched the two detectives and the two women enter the home. "I just need one of them to take a walk on the beach or leave the beach house. Yes, then daddy and I will be safe no one to bother us or embarrass us anymore." Elizabeth quickly placed the items in the duffle and then closed the back of the car. She got inside and drove away.


	54. Chapter 54

**Glazed Feelings **

**Part 54**

**Rizzoli and Isles are the property of TNT and Tess Gerritson. I am just borrowing them for a little angst. Okay, gotta tell ya I have been cheating on ya all. I spent the last two weeks reading J/7 fanfic and it threw me off writing for Maura and Jane. I am going to give that a rest while I finish out the last of Glazed Feelings. Sorry I haven't written faster your humble bard, Deanlu.**

"God, I hate this job sometimes." Jane looked around the room and sighed. The blood stains, tipped over furniture, and chaos remained from the murder still as it should in a protected crime scene. But Jane saw more. After studying the pictures, listening to Maura talk about the autopsy of Terry, and seen all the evidence she had a good idea of what happened. She closed her eyes as she watched the film run forward from the beginning in her mind. The suspect had entered the house while Tony had been out. They surprised Terry and sedated her so there wouldn't be a struggle. It has been someone Terry had known so she hadn't expected it. The suspect had been kind and stabbed her to death while she was unconscious. The young woman had bled to death in the living room and been moved to the bedroom. Obviously, the suspect was worried that someone would hear something or else why sedate them? Was Tony dead before or after Terry? That was the question. The suspect had met Tony somewhere close by; maybe on the beach…suddenly something occurred to Jane. There had been mention of rain that night. Aine had said it was raining like cats and dogs. So the rain had washed the blood away from where Tony was killed Jane bet. Did it wash away all of it though? The rain hadn't gotten rid of the signs of a struggle on Tony's body.

"Maura, did you say the defensive wounds on Tony's body were strange?" Jane asked the doctor as she moved around the house examining the crime scene. Albert and Marston held back behind Jane.

"Yes, they were like she was trying to defend herself, but she couldn't in a way." Maura said as she examined Jane's face while she thought. Maura loved this part of her girlfriend. Jane had an insight into human nature Maura never would. The detective could play with these types of puzzles and over time put pieces together.

"She had to have been drugged somewhat then. Did you find any needle marks on her?" Jane asked turning to look at the back door to the beach.

"No, but her neck was tore up pretty bad with scratches and cuts from a scalpel. Her death wasn't an easy one. It could have been under one of those marks and I didn't find it Jane. I can look again." Maura said softly. Jane thought about the report she had read.

"No, she got the sedative another way then." Jane walked toward the back doors of the beach house and out onto the patio. "Marston, you said there were two cups out on the porch area. What happened to them?" Jane asked when she heard a dog barking from down the beach and saw Harlow retrieving a something from the surf. Harlow brought the item to Imogene and then she watched as the woman threw it back out into the surf causing the dog to chase it.

"They were bagged and the residue tested. We won't have the results for another week due to the backlog at the state labs, but I don't think we will get much Jane. The rain was coming down so hard that the cups had been filled to over flowing. Most likely the rain washed anything inside them away. Why?" Marston asked as Jane took the steps to the beach and walked under the beach house. She began examining the wood braces and the ground below the supports.

"Maura did you find any wood splinters in Tony's clothing?" Jane called as the doctor came up behind her. Maura saw what she was looking at in one of the braces under the house there was a dark stain.

"Yes, I did find wood splinters. I had samples taken and sent them off to be tested." Maura said as Jane pointed to the brace. Albert came over. He photographed the stain. He then made note of where it was found and the photo number from the camera. He took out a moist tip swab and ran it over the stain. He pulled another bottle from the kit and poured a set amount over the tip of the swab. The swab turned pinkish red.

"Definitely blood, I bet if we test it we will find its Tony Jordan's. Then he pulled out another swab and wiped it over the stain again. He placed this in an evidence bag, as well as the other swab in a separate evidence bag. He then removed a special knife from the crime kit and cut away the section of the wood. He again placed this in another evidence bag. Once done he dated and notated on the bag the information needed. Jane looked at the ground.

"Marston, how many people were in the houses here the week the couple was killed?" Jane asked continuing to look at the ground.

"Terry and Tony had one of the beach rentals plus another couple three houses down from here with two children. Imogene lives in her house year around, but she was out of town that week rock climbing in Arizona." Marston said as Jane's head jerked up. "Don't ask me. I just know she goes often on these little trips. You should have seen her the year she came back from climbing Mt. Kilimanjaro. She really puts our police force to shame sometimes with all the physical stuff she does at her age." Jane nodded as she examined the ground.

"Tony was killed first, down here. Her body was probably covered with a tarp to hide it until Terry was eliminated. It was someone they both knew and trusted. The cups on the porch indicate whoever was on a first name basis with them. The report said Terry had gone out shopping that afternoon and come home near as you could figure to around four. Whoever killed Tony either waited until Terry came home or was here with Tony when Terry left. Maybe they came after Terry left. The person must have surprised Terry in the house and killed her there. Tony had been drugged from something in the cups. Whoever had been with Tony was known and trusted by her. When she started to feel something was wrong she attempted to escape and fight back most likely. That's why they were posed. Whoever did it knew their stuff. They didn't want people to know where Tony was killed. Why leave the cups out though?" Jane said as images flooded her mind now and the film was complete. Jane was sure now it had to be the sister. Everything depended on the argument…the argument was the key she believed now.

"Maybe they were interrupted? Maybe the couple from down the other houses was out on the beach with the children and they couldn't risk being seen?" Maura speculated as she watched Jane. She could see the weariness in her lovers face. Maura knew this had become important to Jane, almost personal in a way. "What are you thinking Jane?" Maura knew that look. She'd seen it a hundred times before. "You know who did it don't you?" Maura asked. Jane nodded as Marston and Albert came closer.

"Yes, but I need the physical evidence to prove it. The fight is the key. The evidence from the bodies that is being tested will turn the key and unlock everything." Jane said as she looked at Maura grimacing. Jane turned to address Marston. "It is imperative you find the video from the wedding. I bet the argument is on there. I also think you need to call the guests that were present and re-question them over the fight. You also need to find out what Tony's sister does for a living and find out how close she was to her father. All the statements point to the family not being happy about the gender reassignment for Tony. Then suddenly they are fine with it. Something is wrong with that? Something happened to cause them to lie about it."

"So it's the sister?" Marston asked softly. Jane nodded

"I am almost sure. It could be the father, but this is almost…I am missing something. I know it. But I bet this is the sister." Jane said softly still trying to figure out what piece was eluding her so well. She put it down to her being tired. Marston turned to Albert. "Radio headquarters and have them detain Aine until I get there. I have some questions of my own for him." Albert nodded and headed off to the car. "I can drive you back now detective. My guys radioed while you were inside that the house had been put back in order." Marston declared softly as he shook his head. Jane looked at Maura who shook her head and looked toward the beach.

"I think we will head back by way of the beach. We need the walk to clear our minds. I appreciate the offer." Jane said shaking Marston hand.

"I appreciate your help Jane. Thank you Dr. Isles. You two have been invaluable and I will make sure your boss knows. You ever need a job, come see me." Marston replied shaking Dr. Isle's hand. The two women started off toward their beach house when Albert yelled at Marston. The two turned around, but not before Jane noticed Harlow running toward her. She knelt in the sand as the dog came up to her.

"Hey Harlow, how are you tonight?" The dog began licking Jane and pushing her down in the sand. Imogene came strolling up watching as Harlow treated Jane to a major tongue washing. "Harlow calm down. Harlow enough. Harlow!" Jane said trying to get him off of her while Maura smiled for the first time in a while.

"Harlow, return!" Imogene said firmly. Harlow stopped Jane's impromptu bath and returned to Imogene's side. "Sorry about that it seems he has taken to you." Jane sighed and nodded. "I heard that your place got tossed. I wanted to offer you a respite for tonight. How would you like to be my guests for dinner and the night? I have the spare room made up already."

"Imogene, I appreciate that. I don't know…" Jane began swaying as Maura cut her off and grabbed her arm to steady her. Maura gave Jane a hard look and spoke to Imogene.

"We would love it. Let me get a change of clothes and Jane medications. Then we will come over." Maura said as Marston walked over a concerned look covered his face. The three ladies turned their attention to the detective.

"We have a problem. Aine was released after his statement and sent home until this is resolved. No one can get in touch with him. Jane, we don't know if he is involved or how deeply. I don't think it's a good idea to stay in your beach house." Marston said watching as Imogene's face lit up. The older woman clapped her hands and turned to the two young women.

"Well, there ya go. Albert and Marston can go help you and Maura get your stuff while I get things ready at my place. You can stay with me then until you leave." When Jane and Maura began to protest Imogene shook her finger at them. "Nope, won't hear any protests. You can hide your car in my garage. It's got room for two since I got rid of my Harley Davidson." Jane did a double take as Maura snickered a little.

"Albert, Marston and I will get the stuff. I want Jane to go back to your place Imogene to rest. She can fool everyone else, but I know she's running on empty." Maura said firmly. She leaned over to Jane and whispered, "Don't fight me on this. We both know you're about to drop. I will be safe with Albert and Marston. Please do this for me." Jane looked like she was going to argue for a moment, but then nodded.

"Sure, Imogene and I will head on back with Harlow. Just be careful okay? By the way, bring the groceries back too." Jane said softly as she kissed Maura. "Don't be gone long. I really need you right now." Jane whispered softly as Maura nodded. She noticed Imogene and Marston talking with Albert. "Maura, I'm really stressed about this, don't take any chances. I don't know what I would do if you were hurt. Okay?" Maura nodded pulling Jane into her arms and ran her finger along her cheek and down her jaw.

"…Says the woman who won't stop injuring her body." Maura said softly and kissed Jane. The detective fell into the kiss deepening it. When Maura and Jane broke apart they were both more than a little out of breath. Maura softly rubbed her nose against Jane's and whispered, "I'll be back soon." Jane hugged Maura quickly and let her go feeling a small little thread of fear enter her. Imogene took hold of the detective's arm tucking it into her side and began walking her back to the house. Jane glanced back once to see Maura and the detectives disappear into the house. Jane sighed realizing she couldn't always protect Maura, but knowing she had a deep need to do that all the time. She would have to figure out how to balance that fear, if they were to marry and work together on a regular basis. Harlow circled around the two ladies as they walked down the beach. The middle age dog began barking and then ran down the beach chasing seagulls in the dying light of day.

"She'll be fine Jane. Marston and Albert are good men. They will keep her protected." Imogene spoke softly as Jane nodded. The older woman glanced over at Jane seeing she had really come to the end of her rope for the day. So she decided to insert a little humor. "You know it's been a long time since I've had a sweet young thing on my arm." Imogene snickered as Jane chuckled a little her smile showing up again. "I've kind of missed having a partner in my life. There hasn't been anyone since…" Imogene words trailed off as her thoughts strayed to another time. "Ahh, but that was another adventure for another time."

"I believe you'd have a major fight for me on your hands Imogene. Maura can be quite possessive when she becomes jealous." Jane said smiling softly. Imogene laughed as they started up the beach from the water line toward her home.

"Oh, I can tell Jane. I can tell. I imagine there were quite a few fights over you growing up Jane. You're a beautiful woman, quite accomplished, brave, and many a man or woman would be lucky to be with you." Imogene replied as Jane shook her head no. Imogene noticed a little sadness slip into the detective's face signaling a well hidden story within her depths.

"You'd be surprised at how hard it was to get dates. Everyone wanted one thing, a piece of ass. I was never one of those girls who just wanted a roll in the hay. I wanted something with meaning. I never found that until Maura." Jane stumbled in the sand a little. Imogene caught her pulling her up right. Jane closed her eyes for a minute letting the weariness and strain wash over her. The detective asserted her iron will and opened her eyes. "Sorry, I'm just wiped. Between the physical therapy this morning, the police station, walking through the farmers market, and taking on our home invader I am exhausted." Jane looked toward the surf seeing a haze settling over the water. "Imogene, what is that on the water?"

"Fog, we are supposed to have heavy fog for the next few nights. Weather inversions are here. We may actually have thunderstorms tomorrow late in the afternoon. Come on let's get you settled while I finish dinner." Imogene walked Jane up the beach steps and into the living room area. The older woman settled Jane on the old leather couch. She noticed the detective had started to shiver a little so she retrieved a blanket and a pillow. She helped Jane cover up and get comfortable. Imogene brought her water, a glass of juice, and a couple ibuprofen.

"I know you have pain medication, but I think these will help until we have dinner. I was in the process of cooking when I walked down the beach. Why don't you rest while I finish up preparing our repase. I am sure Maura will be here soon." Jane took the medicine and settled into the old leather couch. Imogene started a fire in the fireplace. When she turned around Jane was sound asleep. Imogene walked over pulled the cover up over the detective's shoulders and settled a kiss on the top of her head. "Oh to be younger Jane, you wouldn't know what hit you." Imogene shook her head. The older woman headed into the kitchen checking the hearty fish stew she had made, along with fresh baked bread that had now cooled. She pulled together the ingredients for a cobbler and set to fixing it. She had just laid the dough out in the pan when the doorbell rang. She quickly checked Jane and then checked who was at the door. Imogene smiled and admitted Dr. Isles through the front door.

"Can I help you with anything?" Imogene asked reaching for a bag. Maura handed her a bag of groceries as Marston brought a couple bags into the beach house. Imogene pointed them to the guest room and settled the groceries in the kitchen. Marston then excused himself as Maura came back out to check where Jane was located. Imogene showed her over to the detective, who was deeply asleep now. Imogene then excused herself and went into the kitchen watching over the serving bar as Maura gently raised the blanket checking her girlfriend's damaged body, taking her pulse, and checking Jane's temperature to assure the doctor the detective was fine.

"You scared me today Jane." Maura whispered making sure she did not wake her partner. There was a tremor in the doctor's voice that belied the sense of fragility for her partner. "Please, no more heroics before you're healed and strong. Let me take on the bad guys and the difficulties for a while. Just a few more weeks Jane, just give it a few more weeks." Maura plead to the sleeping detective desperate for her subconscious to hear and make her mind obey. Jane's hand unconsciously slipped out coming near the doctors brushing ever so lightly against it almost as in affirmation. Maura leaned forward kissing her lover softly and mumbling a few words of comfort. Then the doctor rose heading into the kitchen. She was greeted with a glass of red wine. Imogene could tell how troubled the doctor was now that the day had given way to evening.

"How about you go take a bath and relax before dinner? I have everything under control here." Imogene asked as Maura took a sip of the wine and sat in the chair. Maura shook her head looking back into the living room.

"No, I think I just need to change and spend some time with Jane." Imogene nodded understanding all too well the need to relax and allow the stress to seep away in loving comfort. The older woman handed the doctor a peach slice. Maura accepted the slice taking a bite of the succulent fruit as the sweetness flooded her mouth and dripped from her lips. She grabbed a napkin to wipe away the excess. Imogene finished prepping the peach cobbler and stuffed it into the oven. She set the timer and returned to the counter.

"Well, the Brodetto di Remini will keep for a while. I would like it to simmer to allow the flavors to meld better. Go on and take a nap with your girlfriend." Imogene said looking away as a tear fell down her cheek. Maura reached across the counter and grabbed the older woman's arm before she could escape.

"Why are you doing this Imogene? We have only known you a few days and you've opened you home to us." Maura felt tension gather under the arm she was holding and readied herself for a verbal or physical attack if it came. "I want to be able to trust you. I know Jane is fond of you for some reason. I have never seen her have such a sense of comfort with someone from her first meeting. I need to know Imogene what your intentions are with Jane. I am not blind to the looks you give her." Maura felt the arm relax and released it. Imogene sighed and turned back to look at Maura.

"How about you change and join me in the living room? Maybe I can explain some things to you. Then you won't be so worried." Imogene gave a hesitant smile as Maura examined the older woman for a moment attempting to discern the deeper meeting.

"All right, just give me a few minutes. Bring the wine and the glasses." Maura said as Imogene set the stew to simmer. Imogene watched the doctor head to the bedroom. She wondered why she was getting ready to confide in this woman. She didn't know her. She hadn't confided in anyone in the last twenty years so why now? Imogene growled a little as Harlow came around the corner to check the source of the noise.

"Everything is fine Harlow. Come on, you can keep Jane's feet warm while she sleeps." Imogene said as she grabbed the bottle and glasses heading into the living room. She turned out the majority of lamps leaving a small one on near Jane, but allowing the firelight to light the room. She threw several pillows down on the floor. Harlow jumped up on the couch settling him around Jane's feet like a protective fence. He lowered his head until it rested on her leg above the ankle area and let out a deep sigh. Maura chuckled as she entered noticing Harlow.

"Jane would love that if she could see him." Maura leaned over patting the dog and then checked Jane. She was warm, but not enough to be concerned right now. She kissed her softly whispering, "I love you" to the detective. She sat down on several pillows in front of the couch acting as a sentinel against the surrounding room and Imogene for Jane. Imogene refilled the wine glasses and passed Maura's to the her.

"Harlow has been my constant companion for the last seven years. Before that his mother watched over me as I aged. They have kept me sane and happy all these years. Their love has protected me." Imogene said as Maura sipped her wine. The doctor placed her glass on the nearby stand as she took Jane's hand in hers.

"It's important to be loved to feel protected and wanted." Maura said as she turned watching the light as it reflected off Imogene's eyes and face. In the low light it seemed like Imogene was a coiled snake waiting to strike. Maura shivered at the thought and shoved it aside. "Now, I would like an answer to my question." Maura picked up her wine taking a healthy sip and waited on Imogene.

"You have nothing to fear from me Dr. Isles. I am an old woman who has lost the heart to pursue any relationship." Imogene said then her mouth quirked into a wicked smile. "Now if I were twenty years younger you might have a run for Jane's love from me, but that was long ago. My heart has been claimed for a long time and there will be no others. Jane reminds me of my love in appearance and demeanor only. It has been nice being reminded of what I once had, if for only a short time." Imogene said as a sad look passed over her features. The shadows seem to settle their within the older woman causing her to age before Maura's eyes. Imogene took a healthy swig of the wine as Maura leaned forward placing a hand on her arm.

"Tell me." Maura whispered now not wanting to disturb the woman, but needing to know what caused the devastation before her. Imogene looked into Maura's eye's revealing the naked raw pain of the past causing Maura's breath to be stolen away and a chill to run through her. The scientist in Maura screamed to know where this look came from and how someone who had felt this level of pain could still walk this world.

"I had what you once had Dr. Isles. It was precious to me, but it was taken from me in one of the most savage ways ever." Imogene looked away to the fire. Maura leaned back gently pulling Jane's arm enough not to disturb the sleeping detective, but sufficient enough to kill the icy chill that threatened to destroy the warm love within her. "I bet you didn't know I was an FBI agent?" Imogene glanced to the doctor seeing the shocked look and back to the fire. "I served the bureau for twenty years. They recruited me out of college because I was linguistically gifted. I loved the life. I felt strong, empowered as a woman, and I believed in the patriotic ideals of the department." Imogene emptied her wine glass and refilled it. She leaned over filling Dr. Isle's glass as the fire popped and crackled. The smell of the rich fish stew now began to permeate the house reminding Maura she hadn't eaten in a while. "I was a good agent and rose quickly in the bureau. Five years into my career I fell in love with a beautiful Italian woman who looked a great deal like Jane. We had a torrid love affair very much like you and Jane's." Imogene said as Maura blushed. Imogene laughed softly for the first time since she began telling the tale. It was a warm, deep, husky laugh that sent shivers through you. "I've seen you two together Dr. Isles. Your relationship is passionate, fiery, but it had something my lover and I didn't have at first. It has a foundation built on respect and love. Those two things came over a year later when I saved her from a sniper's bullet on a mission."

"She worked for the bureau?" Maura's voice burred from the cold and fog settling outside seeing it leech in through the window's that were cracked open. Imogene nodded as she took a drink of her wine. Abruptly, Imogene rose and went to the kitchen to retrieve another bottle of wine. While there Imogene stirred the fish soup and tasted it before returning to the living room. She needed a moment to compose the next part of the story so she didn't break completely down. She entered the room to see Maura softly whispering words of comfort to a still sleeping detective and kissing her tenderly. The look Maura was giving Jane flooded Imogene with memories of her lover; relaxing in the early morning sunlight whispering words of love, nights spent in languid, passionate love making, and days in joyful bliss arm in arm walking down the beach or parks just together. So many memories the older woman had tried to bottle up and now the cork had popped open.

"Yes, she worked for the bureau. She was a field agent with damn good instincts. We were able to hide our relationship for the better of two years and continue to work side by side. Eventually, it became too much to hide. We wanted to marry, but at the time no state would allow that. So we formed a civil union and then went to our boss to inform him as bureau policy dictated. Amazingly, our boss understood. We could no longer work with each other, but we both retained our jobs. It wasn't easy being in the bureau as a couple. It was very conservative during that time and the work environment could be very harsh at times. Over time we formed good friendships which went a long way to protecting us from the outward hatred. Our life, while not easy, became enjoyable and semi-peaceful." Imogene stopped as she sipped her wine for a while lost in those sweet memories.

"So what happened?" Maura asked not feeling the tension that had returned to the detective's body signaling she was awake and listening. Jane stayed still being very careful to keep her breathing steady while tuning her hearing to the conversation.

"Her team was dispatched to help a city track down a serial killer in the south. I believe it was Savannah. Several little girls of African American descent whom were all born on a certain date in consecutive years had been targeted. It took over two months trying to figure out everything, but he made a mistake finally. They figured out who it was and went in to arrest him. He lived in this shack in the middle of nowhere out in the woods." Imogene's face took on this little smile and softened creating an effect that seemed to erase the year's right before Maura's eyes. "I remember hearing her voice that morning on the phone. She was so excited. Months of pain staking work had finally paid off. We had planned to celebrate with a two week vacation when she returned. I had been wrapped up in a banking scandal with some Russian financiers who were trying to cheat the treasury so we had no time to get together during the two months. We missed each other so much. Believe me when I say phone calls only go so far." Imogene laughed a little. The older woman's face hardened as her voice took on a bitter edge. "They didn't know he enjoyed booby traps. They had only ever found his victims and he wanted them found. They had stormed the cabin from the front and back. The two agents coming through the back were immediately hit with rigged arrows, luckily, in the arm and leg." Imogene rose now and walked to the window watching the fog darken the night even more on the beach dissolving even the faint glare of the street lights. "My love wasn't so lucky. He rigged a sawed off shot gun with a five second delay as they entered the front door. It missed the agent in front of her and caught her on the left side of her neck and head from less than three feet away. She bled to death slowly before they could get her to the hospital. The serial killer was sentenced to life multiple times over. Yet, his life sentence is more enjoyable than mine." Imogene walked into the kitchen not even looking toward the couch where Jane was holding a weeping Dr. Isles. The detective's tears mixing with the doctors.


	55. Chapter 55

**Glazed Feelings**

**Part 55**

**Rizzoli and Isles are the property of TNT and Tess Gerritson! Sorry for the delay. It has been a hectic return to school. I was surprised when asked to teach three different subjects this year and be the PTA president because no parents would volunteer. So my days are long. I have not forgotten you all. I am hoping to have the next part up tomorrow. Please enjoy as always your humble bard, Deanlu.**

"It's okay Maura. Shhh, it's not us. Shhh. Come on, our story has a different ending." Maura's pain had tumbled out with Imogene's words because she could feel every word. She had felt them over and over as she sat next to Jane's hospital bed. Especially the day Jane had shot herself. Deep inside where no one looked she relived that day. It caused shivers and sometimes paralyzing fear within the doctor as she would remember how close to losing her detective she had come in this life. Jane's warm, vibrant arms comforted Maura allowing her to reign in her emotions.

"Sorry, oh God I am sorry Jane. I didn't mean to…" Maura's tear choked whispers were cut off in a reassuring, deeply loving kiss. Maura allowed Jane to pull her away from the here and now through the kiss banishing the despair that had over taken her. She could feel Jane's warm breath, the pounding of her heart, and the melting of the cold icy grasp of memory that taunted her. When Maura opened her eyes she discovered she was fully seated in Jane's lap with those strong, agile arms of her lover wrapped around her their foreheads resting against the others. The doctor's left hand rested over Jane's heart counting the slow, steady beats while her right hand was wrapped behind her lover's neck holding Jane to her. Jane had this quirky grin on her face that made Maura smile.

"What are you smiling about?" Maura asked feeling Jane's right hand rub gentle circles over her back releasing the tension that had built up as the detective studied the doctor. Jane's warm breath wafted across Maura's cheek drawing the doctor closer.

"You. I absolutely love you. I'm not sure you really understand that. I am completely, utterly, and forever in love with you." Jane whispered as she watched the shocked, but answering smiled spread across the medical examiner's face. Suddenly, Jane was bowled over and fell to the floor as Maura's surged forward peppering her with kisses knocking her completely off the couch. It was so sudden and so wild that Jane didn't even feel the hard slam of the floor which robbed her of breath. There was only Maura, her smell, her touch, her taste…her everything surrounding Jane. It was like drowning in passion. Something Jane had never felt with anyone else before and it swept her up completely. Several minutes, hours, Jane wasn't quite sure when, there came a clearing of a throat. Imogene stood in the doorway of the kitchen having placed her emotions back under control and now had a mild smirk on her face.

"Dinner is ready, though, it looks like Maura has already started her feast." Imogene stated with a soft chuckle. Maura looked at Jane and then broke her contact looking toward Imogene unapologetically for her behavior. Jane was still trying to catch her breath and calm the raging desire that had taken her over. It was almost impossible with Maura now straddling her on the floor Maura's wet, hot center pressed against her most intimate area. Even through the jeans they both wore there was no protection against the raging fire Maura had lit in her.

"We will be right there. Thank you Imogene." Maura said with a glint of mischief in her eyes. She glanced back down at Jane trapped beneath her. "We just need a minute."

"It seems like you need all night to me." Imogene said with a bark of laughter and retreated to the kitchen. The whole conversation had gone over Jane's head though. She was looking up into Maura's face even as her breath was swept away again. Maura had a wild look in her eye that caused Jane's blood to race. Maura leaned over in the next minute pressing down against Jane causing the detective to gasp as she felt a warm flood in her nether regions.

"You are going to wait. I promise it will be worth it." Maura left a soft kiss on Jane's lips even as she rose quickly leaving only an invasion of cold air between her and Jane. Maura reached down offering her hand to help Jane up. The detective shook her head pushing down a groan. She was going to die a slow death from desire and passion through dinner tonight and from looks on Maura's face it was going to be slow torture.

Have they found Aine yet?" Jane asked even as she squirmed a little. They had been at the dinner table for about thirty minutes. Maura had taken complete advantage of sitting opposite of Jane. Between the hot sultry looks and Maura's wandering foot Jane was anything, but comfortable. The day had reminded Maura that life was unpredictable. You needed to take advantage of every moment, because you never knew when it would come to an end. As she stared across the table gazing on Jane and listening to the conversation between her lover and Imogene she made a decision. She would no longer run and hide inside from Jane. She would embrace everything and enjoy this life with an exuberance that had been lacking in the past. While dangers, pain, and hurt would come and go in their lives she would no longer let it prevent her from loving Jane completely.

"No and I am worried Jane. I have known Aine for a long time. This is not like him. I just can't believe he is involved in this situation. We are all missing something." Imogene said firmly. It was then something occurred to Imogene. "Oh my! Oh my goodness. I think I may have made a major mistake." Imogene said looking up at Jane suddenly.

"What? What's wrong?" Jane said setting her spoon down. Imogene had gone decidedly pale. Maura became alerted to the conversation now.

"Elizabeth, she's coming here tomorrow to talk to me. I hadn't realized it after the phone call, but she is a wanted person right now. I think I may have invited a murderer to the house." Imogene said rising. "I am going to notify Marston. Go ahead and finish you dinner." Imogene left the room. Maura had stopped eating and looked to be in deep thought now.

"Why would Elizabeth risk coming to talk with Imogene? She would have to know by now she was a prime suspect. Why take the risk?" Maura asked just as the doorbell rang. Jane rose motioning Maura to stay put.

"I'm not sure." Jane said as she walked down the hallway and toward the front door. She looked through the security viewer and saw a police badge. She opened the door just as Imogene called from the study.

"Jane? Maura? Who's at the door?" Imogene called. Jane barely had time to think when the door opened as a body stumbled and fell through. Jane saw a splash of blonde hair as she reached out and caught the person. She lowered the body to the floor even as she tried to assess who it was she was holding.

"Maura! I need you now. Imogene, call an ambulance and the police." Jane yelled even as she recognized Aine's face as she rolled the body over. He was beaten badly. "Aine, can you hear me. Aine, stay with me. You're safe Aine." His eyes were desperately trying to focus on Jane. Maura arrived and opened Aine's coat to discover his shirt soaked in blood. She ripped open the button up shirt, and then ripped the undershirt. There were two stab wounds to Aine's chest.

"Jane, we need the paramedic's now." Jane could hear the ambulance in the distance. Maura took Aine's pulse and looked at Jane. Jane had seen that look before the day the she was shot as Frankie laid on one of the morgue tables. Jane tried to get Maura to deny it, but the look never changed.

"Oh God, no. Aine, fight hard. Come on, you can do it." Jane said desperately not wanting to see her childhood friend die. Maura staunched the flow of bleeding as best as she could. One glanced toward the door and the porch told her Aine had been bleeding for a while and the loss was great.

"Jane…she's crazy…" Aine struggled with the words. Maura could hear the gurgling of liquid as Aine attempted to speak. She heard the screech of tires as the ambulance pulled up and now other sirens in the distance. "She killed them…" Aine never had a chance to say more as he lost conscientiousness. Outside, the screeching of more tires echoed into the house. The paramedics worked quickly to stabilize Aine for transport even as Marston and Albert came running up. They watched as IV's and breathing tubes were started. Aine was then loaded into the ambulance even as Marston began question Jane and Maura.

"What happened?" Marston asked. Jane relayed the events of the last half hour. Marston shook his head. "So it is her. Did Aine say where he had been? Where she was located?" Jane shook her head. "Alright, I'm leaving a patrol officer stationed across the street to keep an eye on the house and everyone here. I don't need any more dead or injured people."

"Now wait a minute. I need to get to the hospital to check on Aine." Jane said as she began to argue. Marston stepped into her personal space and shook his head.

"No Jane. You are under the protection of the police department here. Therefore, you will stay put. I will go to the hospital and let you know what is going on with Aine. You have already been injured from a previous incident connected to our case when you are only consulting. I have strict orders from my captain and your captain to keep you out of the case now. You have consulted. We know who did it. The last of the evidence will be back in another twenty-four hours. You are to sit still and rest. You are out of it. That is a direct order from your captain!" Jane glared at him for another minute and then dropped her head. God she hated this she hated being side lined. She had no jurisdiction here to interfere. She was on medical leave and it could cost her badge if she didn't follow orders. She pushed the rage down.

"All right, but I want to be kept apprised of Aine's condition. I also want updates on what you know out of courtesy. I don't like this, but I understand." A patrol officer approached the house catching Albert's attention. The detective walked over and a short discussion ensued as Marston looked at Imogene.

"I think you should let them know." Marston said and then walked over to where his partner was located. Jane and Maura looked at Imogene.

"What does he mean?" Jane asked turning her glare on Imogene. Imogene sighed and motioned them toward the study. Officers were still lingering outside taking evidence from the porch area. One officer was stationed in the entrance way as protection until all was done. Imogene had Maura and Jane take a seat on the sofa in the study.

"I've not been really forth coming and truthful with you. The Bureau engaged me to keep an eye on you through your recovery. It seems that Detective Korsak called in a favor owed by either Agent Tipton or Agent James. He asked that someone watch over both of you until your return to Boston since and I quote, "The Bureau has fucked up enough of your life," unquote. He seemed to think we could be a help for a change. So I have been unobtrusively watching over you both." Imogene said as she watched the anger rise in Jane's face and a sense of amusement in Maura's.

"What! So you befriended us, invited us into your life just to watch over us!" Jane began to rise. "Let's go Maura!" Maura grabbed Jane's hand and pulled her down causing the detective to falter.

"No! Sit Jane." Maura said as Jane's mouth operated like a fish underwater for a moment. "I believe there is more." Maura said as she placed a hand on Jane's face begging her silently to wait and calm down. Jane groused quietly, but capitulated to her lover. Maura now looked at Imogene for further explanation.

"Thank you. Yes, there is a little more. You're father, Maura, asked me to watch over you two also. He and Korsak came to the bureau shortly before Jane was being readied to be release from the hospital. I must say Dr. Isles your father can be quite persuasive when he wants to be. It must be all that Isles money from the foundation he has that he waves around." Imogene said even as Maura's breath stilled. Her father had not been present for Jane's recovery only her mother and Paddy. How had her father gotten back from Austria so fast? Maura recovered some her voice and calmed the inside tension.

"Yes, he can be very persuasive when he wants to be Imogene." Maura said still trying to put pieces together.

"He is a very handsome man for an Irishman." Maura's eye's rose and she looked at Jane. Jane's eyes told Maura to say nothing. "After Korsak and he told us about the situation I could not refuse. So I agreed to keep an eye on you both. Let me tell you Jane that the night you ran out onto the rocks if Maura hadn't grabbed you I would have had you. I don't think she even saw me off to her right due to the darkness. Dr. Reynolds saw me though so I was forced to bring her into my confidence. She had been helping me check your house out and keep an eye on you two until she left." Imogene informed the two ladies even as the door to the study opened admitting Detective Marston. Jane and Maura looked up.

"Aine has stabilized. It has been confirmed that the Elizabeth Jordan attacked and stabbed Aine. Two officers have been sent to bring in Terry Jordan's father for further questioning. There seems to be some sort of strange relationship between Elizabeth and him." Marston stated evenly. "Aine did not drive here and was not transported. We can only conclude he was attacked and trapped nearby. We have several officers who are going to be searching tonight. Tomorrow, we will continue if we find nothing. We are leaving two units on the house to assure your safety. I will let you know when I have something more." Marston looked toward Imogene. "No one, but Albert or I are to be admitted to the house. The patrol officer's know to only come in if there a disturbance. Imogene, protect these two at all costs. Aine's last words before he was taken away for surgery were, "protect Jane." Aine never says something lightly." Imogene nodded as she reached into the drawer and removed her gun. She then opened another drawer and pulled out standard issue police gun and several magazines.

"You're going to need this Jane. Dr. Isles?" Imogene questioned the doctor whom shook her head no. Imogene walked over to a nearby cabinet. She pulled out two bullet proof vests. She handed them off to Jane and Maura. "I suggest you make these a part of your wardrobe the next few days until you leave."

"I will see you all in the morning." Marston nodded to the ladies. Imogene followed him to the door locking it after she gave a few parting words to the detective. She then returned to the study. The two women were huddled on the couch, heads touching, soft words being spoken. Imogene was loath to break in to the conversation.

"I'm sorry about all this. If all had worked out you would have never known I was watching over you. I would have preferred it that way." Imogene said as she saw how Jane held Maura close on the couch. She knew the two women had been whispering their conversation before she returned.

"So all the joking around, the story about your partner, was it just a lie?" Jane's angry words slapped at Imogene's carefully erected barriers. So like her former lover. Imogene knew the next few days were going to be tough now. Something she had tried to avoid.

"No, everything I have told you is true. I know your mad Jane, but understand I didn't want to interfere any more than I had to with your life. I wanted you and Maura to be able to relax and heal like the doctor ordered without worry. Hate me if you want, but I have been truthful in everything except the part on letting you know I was protecting you." Imogene stated. She called for Harlow and then left the study. Jane let out a shaky breath and rose. She walked to the window looking out over the inky, black fog. Her thoughts soon became lost in the last few days. How could everyone have made so many decisions without her? Just because she had been injured and hurt. Jane knew it was true. She didn't want her friends and family to have to carry her burdens. Maura moved up behind the detective wrapping her arms around her waist softly nuzzling her neck.

"I don't like being lied too. I don't like people putting themselves on the line for me." Jane whispered as her hands reached down to cover Maura's and she leaned back into her lover. "I don't like losing control of a situation." Maura kissed the back of her neck softly and hummed.

"You have to learn to start Jane. You are not super woman. If anything this last month has taught us it should be that we need our friends and family. Accept this Jane so we can stop Elizabeth. Imogene has been a good friend to us even if she was not forth coming in why at first. You had good feelings about her right off the bat so that should count for something. As much as I tease you about your gut feelings you know more about human beings than anyone I know." Maura spoke softly continuing to nuzzle the detective's neck. Maura's statement made Jane remember another time in the morgue at BPD when they had discussed Jane's understanding of human behavior. Jane had told her yes, bad people. Maybe she was wrong. Maybe it was people over all. She heard footsteps and placed herself between Maura and the door. Imogene appeared allowing Jane to relax.

"I've checked all the doors and windows to make sure they are locked. The fire is going in the living room and a bottle of wine has been set out chilling with two glasses. Please, take some time with each other. Harlow will be in the hallway. I am off to bed with Carmen." Jane's eyebrow rose inquiringly. "The opera Jane there is a special broadcast of it from the Metropolitan Opera tonight. Wake me if you need anything. Goodnight." Imogene disappeared down the hallway. The subtle sounds of a door clicking shut echoed back.

"Come Jane." Maura growled softly causing shiver bumps to rise along Jane's skin. "Nothing will happen tonight. There has been too much commotion. Let's have some wine and enjoy the fire that has been provided." Maura's words wormed their way down into Jane's heart even as the doctor pulled Jane toward the living room. Fire light reflected through the room as Maura released Jane's hand. She grabbed a nearby blanket tossing it across the floor along with some pillows. She then poured Jane and herself a glass of wine. Jane set her gun nearby as she knelt down next to the doctor.

"I'm not comfortable with all of this Maura." Jane said softly to the kneeling woman in front of her. "I'm scared to let my guard down." Maura leaned forward kissing the side of Jane's mouth.

"We do not have to do anything you do not want to Jane. All we need to do is be together. I won't let anyone spoil our last few days here. Life gives us a lot of difficulties Jane. Let our time together be a safety net." Maura's desire laced response mesmerized Jane willing her to let her guard down. Jane thought about it. Harlow was in the hallway. He was sensitive to noise and would alert them if anyone was near. The house was locked up and two patrol officers stationed outside nearby. Jane looked into the eyes of her lover seeing the smoldering embers that waited to be set ablaze. In that moment she was lost to Maura's siren call. Jane leaned forward kissing Maura deeply allowing the fire in both of them to rise up and consume them.

"Yes." Jane responded when the two women broke apart. Clothes were quickly shed as desperation for touching each other's skin became over riding. Inside the house as the lovers joined together in that most ancient of dances nothing stirred. Harlow kept watch as Imogene listened to Carmen. Outside two patrolmen watched the road and the house. While on the beach through one of the beach house window's a young woman watched the two lovers and seethed in anger. They were just like Terry and they needed to be punished. She would punish them if it was the last thing she did.


	56. Chapter 56

**Glazed Feelings**

**Part 56**

**Rizzoli and Isles are the property of TNT and Tess Gerritson. I'm sorry for the delay. Just a word of warning there is some explicit stuff in here. Well, I don't consider it that, but it is so a word of warning.**

"_They were ungodly. They were filth. They needed to die. Her sister had infected others. She would need to make it her life mission to stamp out this disease. It was bigger than her father even realized. Didn't he understand Terry couldn't be allowed to live and spread her disease to others. The little whore she had married had wanted children. How could she have let that happen? No it was wrong. She couldn't trust the police to understand. Aine had tried to convince her to turn herself in at the station. She had showed him. Now she would deal with these two. Very soon." _Elizabeth Jordan watched through the window as the two lovers bestowed their gifts of love upon each other. Elizabeth was drawn to the caramel headed woman. She watched as Dr. Isle's climaxed again and again for her lover. "_Yes, she would be first. She would force the brunette to watch as her lover's life bled out across the ground. This doctor was to blame. She knew how infections worked. She must have helped infect a certain part of the population." _She watched as Jane cried out even as Maura demanded more from her. "_Yes, it was definitely the doctor's fault. It was plot by a group in society to change people. She would stop it. She would be seen as a hero."_ Elizabeth's sick and diseased mind continued on with these thoughts even as she watched the lovers. She would have to get rid of the dog first, then Imogene would be next so she had a clear shot at the other two. The officers on patrol were no problem. It was just a matter of deceit to keep them from interfering. Elizabeth slowly moved into the shadows near the base of the beach house. She just needed to wait now for her opportunity. Dawn would be there soon and then she could take care of the above problem. Her father would be so proud of her.

Meanwhile at the police station Marston was totally flummoxed by what he had learned. Albert kept shaking his head as he read the transcripts.

"Why weren't we told by Terry Jordan's father the first time? He deliberately withheld information crucial to this investigation. All this time we could have had her in custody!" Detective Marston yelled angrily. Albert kept shaking his head as he read the medical files that had arrived at the precinct while they had been at Jane and Maura's beach house. There was no doubt now.

"_Patient has been diagnosed with borderline personality disorder and delusional disorder. It is the recommendation of the Dr. Legowitz and Dr. Ambrose that Elizabeth Jordan be committed to a Mental Health hospital for psychiatric treatment for no less than a year. The disorders that said patient is exhibiting border on Severe to Critically unstable and could cause harm to the public and family." _Albert read down the page and shook his head at the bottom of the page where a notation. _"Mr. Jordan refuses treatment of his daughter believing she is just tired and needs rest. He refuses to believe she has mental disorders that are dangerous in nature. Since patient has not exhibited any behavior dangerous to the public at this time Dr. Legowitz and Dr. Ambrose cannot recommend or apply for a medical court order to retain said patient." _The notation was dated 3 weeks before Terry Jordan's wedding and subsequent death.

"So the father's continued dislike and anger over the incident pushed Elizabeth to form whatever theory her mind has inside and to take actions to fix the problem." Albert stated after reading. Marston nodded as he read Aine's statement.

"Aine was just a pawn. He really never knew if he had been with Elizabeth that night or not as she drugged him earlier in the day. Once he passed out, it was just a matter of removing his clothes in the bed. Then she left, killing Terry and her partner. She returned to her house, cleaned up, and disposed of the murder weapon. Then she showered slid into bed with Aine. She made sure to make love to him as the drug wore off to make sure he thought he had spent all day with her. In his confused state he would never have known she had not been there. It wasn't until he was suspected of the killing that he had gone back to her house to search it. He found the drugs and evidence from the murder she hadn't gotten rid of yet. She caught him though unexpectedly and attacked him. He barely made it out alive." Marston said as he grabbed the now cold coffee he had been sipping on for the last hour.

"Then where is she? Aine seemed to think she was still here in town. He said he thought he heard her say something." Albert said he set the papers down on his desk and leaned back in the chair thinking. "He lost consciousness before we could ask him what."

"I have a bad feeling, Albert, a very bad feeling." Marston said as he walked over to the window and watched the first rays of morning pierce the cold sky. "Something is going to happen. We need to find her. Radio the patrol to do a sweep around Imogene's beach house. Tell them we are heading over there." Marston said as he moved toward the doors. Albert pulled his cell phone out of his pocket even as the first rumbles of distant thunder seemed to hail impending doom.

Imogene moved down the hallway toward the living room. She stopped near the guest bedroom opening the door softly to find Maura and Jane had moved into the room from their night of lovemaking. She closed the door to let the exhausted women rest. She moved to the sliding glass door that faced the beach and called Harlow. She would let him run outside quickly while she made coffee. She would then join him to watch the first rays of dawn greet another day. She called for Harlow and let him out. Entering the kitchen she set to work with the coffee. She heard Harlow's barking nearby, but paid no mind. Harlow often barked at birds or shadows in the morning. She poured a cup of coffee and headed down to the beach. She saw Harlow lying down near the surf. He seemed to be asleep.

"Harlow?" The dog did not move. "Harlow! Come Harlow!" A slight movement accompanied with a whine reached her. Imogene dropped her cup and ran toward Harlow. Dropping into the sand next to her companion's body she grabbed him and rolled him over. Her hands came away bloody as the dog whined. "Oh, Harlow." Imogene said as she worried over the dog. "Who did this to you?"

"Strange you should ask Imogene!" Elizabeth Jordan said as Imogene rose only to fall to the sand in shock as the impact of two bullets caught her in her hip and shoulder. Imogene didn't move. "That was way too easy." Elizabeth chuckled as she moved toward the beach house. "Now for the other two ladies." Elizabeth returned to the beach house. Entering by the sliding glass door and locking it. She then pulled the curtain so no one would see her. She glanced around the living room and moved toward the kitchen. No one was there. She then moved down the hallway very quietly listening for even the slightest sound. None were to be heard. She checked the bathroom and Imogene's office. She then checked the next guest room and found what she had been looking for as she cracked open the door. The two lovers were wrapped in each other's arms their limbs sprawled across the other. Elizabeth watched as Jane rolled over and away from Maura. Maura followed spooning into the detective. Elizabeth froze as Dr. Isles called to her lover.

"Jane, I love you." Maura said as she kissed her lover allowing soft hands to gently caress and massage.

"Mmmmm, love you Maura." Jane said as she rolled over delivering a very amorous wake up kiss to her lover. It was quickly turning into more than just a morning kiss when Maura placed two fingers on Jane's lips as the detective attempted to deepen the kiss.

"Hold that thought while I run to the restroom. Be right back, don't go anywhere." Maura whispered kissing Jane quickly and then hopping out of bed. She donned her robe and put her hand on the door handle.

"Don't be long!" Jane said with a feral growl causing Maura to turn her head as she opened the door. Maura never had a chance to respond. Jane's eyes grew large suddenly as Elizabeth Jordan appeared and grabbed Maura's hair twisting it around her hand. She forced the doctor back against her with the gun under her Maura's chin. Jane was on her feet with the gun in her hand, but could not use it.

"Don't or the pretty doctor's brains will be splattered all over the bedroom." Elizabeth yanked hard on Maura's hair causing the good doctor to scream. "Now, slowly place the gun on the floor."

"Jane, don't listen to her. Shoot her." Maura cried out. Elizabeth shoved the gun harder against Dr. Isle's neck causing a cut. Jane watched as blood welled to the surface of Maura's neck.

"Shut up Dr. Isle's or you'll die now." Elizabeth yelled angrily. She needed these women to capitulate. Why wasn't this going like before Elizabeth questioned herself.

"You're going to kill us anyway, so what does it matter?" Maura replied feeling the hold on her hair tighten.

"Maura stop." Jane called from across the bedroom trying to get her lover not to goad Elizabeth. "Elizabeth, let Maura go and I'll put the gun down. You have us both. Just let Maura come to me." Jane called softly and firmly.

"Ooooh no, Jane. You're just like Aine. He thought he could get me to do what he wanted if he spoke a certain way. Now put the gun down or Dr. Isles here is going to bleeding really well." Jane hesitated. It was a Mexican standoff of sorts. Jane hated that saying, but it was appropo.

"Why us Elizabeth? Why are trying to hurt us." Jane asked attempting to find any weakness in Elizabeth's defense.

"You're just like Terry and her whore. I saw you last night detective." Jane's eyes flashed to Maura's. "I saw her defiling your body with her own. Did you know she is infecting you detective? She and her kind are out to spread their disease. Just like that whore Terry married. They wanted children detective. It would have spread the disease even further. I couldn't risk that. I couldn't let their kind spread further. My father wouldn't listen to me. He said in the end we had to accept Terry for who she was. Ha! What a laugh. He couldn't even stand being in the same room with them. So I took care of daddy's problem like a good little girl. But I was too late!" Elizabeth screamed yanking hard on Maura's hair and fingering the trigger.

"No, no you aren't too late. Calm down Elizabeth. Why do you think you're too late?" Jane said softly as she slowly moved to get a better shot. Jane's heart was hammering hard. She knew she would only get one chance.

"She took you in the living room. You gave yourself to her detective. You gave yourself to this whore. That won't happen again. I won't let her kind infect anymore people. I promise I will kill them all. Now, you have to the count of three to drop that gun. One…" Jane desperately tried to find a way to take out Elizabeth without hitting Maura.

"Maura…I love you" Jane said as she glanced to floor and back up hoping Maura got the message. It had worked several other times.

"Two…" Elizabeth said shifting with Maura a little. Maura readied her body.

"Now!" Jane yelled as Elizabeth said "three" Immediately, several things happened. Maura dropped like dead weight causing Elizabeth to loose grasp on the gun. Jane fired two shots dead on and then another two shots sounded. Jane watched her heart in her throat as Maura and Elizabeth landed in a crumpled heap not moving. Behind them lying on the floor was Imogene her gun still warm from being fired. She watched as Jane ran across the room. She slowly lowered her gun falling forward to lay in the hallway.

"Maura!" Jane screamed out crossing the floor and kicking the gun away from Elizabeth. Quickly she checked for a pulse on Elizabeth. There was no heartbeat. The bitch would never hurt anyone again. She then bent over Maura as shouts of "Police!" echoed through house. "Maura, come on baby. Please be okay. Maura?" Marston and Albert came down the hallway. Marston bent over Imogene checking for a pulse. "We need an ambulance here." Imogene gurgled out a response to Marston.

"Harlow, on the beach. Emergency vet." Imogene said as she lost consciousness.

"Officer, call Ted with the Emergency veterinary service. Tell him to get here ASAP, then go to the beach and check Harlow." The officer turned making the call as he ran toward the beach.

"Maura…"Jane's voice was low. "Come on…" She rolled Maura over checking her body over. There was a slight graze on Maura's temple and a cut from the gun on her neck, but other than that Jane could not find anything else. Albert looked up from Elizabeth's body and shook his head toward Marston. Another patrol officer had come through the door.

"Call for the coroner." Marston said as Albert moved over to the bed and grabbed Jane's robe. She had been naked the whole time. Jane never felt as Albert helped her with the robe. She only had eyes for Maura.

"Jane?" Maura whispered softly as she opened her eyes. Jane fell forward enveloping her fiancée in a full body hug. Jane was shaking so hard Maura thought she would shake apart. "My hero." Maura whispered. "Come on, help me up." Jane pulled herself up even as she brought Maura with her. The doctor stumbled a little as she reached for her head. "I'm okay." Maura said as she looked around. Paramedics had arrived and were tending Imogene. Marston and Albert were speaking in low tones just off to the side. Jane led Maura to the bed and sat with her on the end.

"Maura? I think I have had all the vacation I can take. I think it's time we went home." Jane said as she watched worriedly as the paramedics tended to Imogene. Jane was still shaking from what happened. She was definitely going to need to see Dr. Fontaine when all was said and done.

**Epilogue coming….It will be the last chapter. It will tie up all the loose ends. **


	57. Chapter 57

**Glazed Feeling**

**Epilogue**

**Rizzoli and Isles are the property of TNT and Tess Gerritson. One last aria until the end. Enjoy.**

"Deep breath in detective…good. Please turn slowly to your left…good Jane." The directions continued for another thirty minutes as Jane followed Dr. Reynolds orders. "Good Jane. Alright, let me check the labs we ran and I will be right back. You can put your shirt back on and your pants." Dr. Reynolds nodded to Dr. Isles who sat patiently in a chair across the room. Dr. Reynolds left as Maura helped Jane dress and left a slow, soft kiss on those lips of her soon to be wife. They had been back for six long weeks now. Jane had returned to light desk duty three weeks ago. She had cleared up four cold cases, resigned two back to the pile unsolved, and was currently working on one.

"What if he says no Maura? I don't know if I can take another three weeks on desk duty." Jane said softly her arms now resting around the doctor's waist.

"We will cross that bridge when we come to it. Dr. Fontaine said you were ready to go back up here." Maura said gently tapping Jane's brow. "Jerry just wants to make sure your physically ready. Trust him Jane." Maura whispered kissing along her fiancée's jaw. Jane sighed deeply just wanting this whole nightmare over. Then something occurred to her as she opened her eyes and took in her loves face.

"How are you? How are the headaches?" Jane asked softly looking into her loves eyes making sure she didn't hide her response. The graze from the bullet had caused headaches that had blown Maura's concentration at first. Dr. Fontaine had believed it was more and so had spent several weeks forcing Maura to confront whatever her mind was struggling with afterwards. Jane worried it had been her actions, but Dr. Fontaine and Maura had assured her it wasn't. Still, inside Jane worried about it.

"I am fine. Headaches are off and on, but those are stress now. They are not from the bullet or my hair being pulled." Maura said watching as the anger once again flared in the back of Jane's eyes for her. "Shhh, love. She is dead and cannot hurt us anymore. Terry and her wife have justice. Let it go." Jane rested her head forward. She just couldn't get that night out of her head. Dr. Fontaine said it would take a while, but she had talked through it with the doctor and still it woke her from sleep.

"I had a phone call from Imogene last night. It seems Harlow is back to his old self almost." Jane said as she continued to gently caress Maura's face. Since the morning in the beach house she couldn't touch Maura enough. She constantly worried if she was safe through the day. Maura had jumped on her about the over bearing protection stuff one day at home. It had been an ugly argument until Jane had whispered in a broken voice, "I just can't get the image of Elizabeth holding you by the hair with the gun under your chin out of my head." Jane had said as she deflated somewhat and slouched into the couch. Maura had felt the air literally whoosh out of her. Maura hadn't realized how deeply the incident had affected Jane. Sure, she knew the detective was shaken, but Jane handled things like this all the time. She had run over to Jane grabbing her up into a warm, tight hug whispering words of reassurance to her until the detective had taken a shaky breath and kissed her back. They had talked after that. Really talked like there was no tomorrow. Maura had agreed to certain restrictions so Jane could trust she was safe. Jane had promised to try and limit the stupid stuff. They both had enough dark stuff buried inside each other. They didn't need to be adding to it. The sessions with Dr. Fontaine were going well. Both felt more stable in who they were now as individuals and their relationship. It was a matter of normalcy that needed to be returned. Jane returning to active duty was the final step.

"I heard she had started dating that little nurse which had come in to see her during her convalescence in the hospital?" Maura said slyly. Jane chuckled remembering visiting Imogene after she had surgery. Imogene had been real lucky. The bullet had passed high on the shoulder getting lodged in the shoulder blade, but away from the heart. The one in her hip went through a fleshy area. It was more painful than harmful. The first thing out of Imogene's mouth after she woke was how was Harlow? Jane had been able to tell the older woman he was fine and recovering. She didn't have the heart to tell her it had been touch and go through Harlow's surgery. Ted had been good though. Harlow would live to chase more bitches across the white sands of Martha's Vineyard. Imogene's recovery had been a battle of stubbornness between Imogene and a nurse called Sherry. Sherry had taken a liking to Imogene. Cute part, Sherry wasn't Imogene's nurse. She had sat in for another nurse's shift one night. After that she seemed to just show up all the time when Jane stopped by or called. Imogene had been giving the nursing staff a lot of grief one day. Sherry had basically stepped in and totaled bowled over Imogene with a few correctly placed remarks. Sherry had bullied Imogene into behaving. It had been odd and in a way relieving to Jane and Maura. Imogene needed someone near.

"Yeah, Imogene was complaining she had to wait another week before they could have some private time." Jane chuckled.

"Does it bother you Sherry is twenty years younger than Imogene?" Maura asked watching Jane's face. Jane sighed and shook her head.

"No, she deserves to be happy. Sherry seems very devoted and loves her. We will just keep track of them. If she breaks Imogene's heart though, I will personally fix it so she never gets out of another traffic ticket ever." Jane said as Maura chuckled as her lovers joke. The door opened and in walked Dr. Reynolds.

"Good news. I am releasing you to active duty. I still want to see you here in 6 months for another checkup. However, I can pronounce you fit for duty Jane. Here's a list of exercises I want you to continue with for that little hitch you're experiencing. It should go away in another week or so. I also want to see you in here for your flu and pneumonia shot come fall. No exceptions!" Dr. Reynolds said as he reached out to shake Jane's hand. Jane smiled as she shook the doctor's hand.

"Thank you doctor see you in six months." Jane said as she pulled her light jacket on and wrapped an arm around Maura. Jane and Maura moved through Dr. Reynolds clinic and out into the sunshine. It was close to summer now and the heat was coming on throughout Boston.

"How about lunch with your favorite medical examiner?" Maura asked as Jane opened the door of the doctor's Lexus and gave her a helping hand in the passenger side. She carefully closed the door. The detective rounded to the driver's side and once seated buckled her seatbelt. Jane nodded giving Maura and impish grin

"Where too?" Jane asked before heading out of the parking lot and into traffic.

"How about Uburgers on Tremont? You can have your burger built your own way, while I have a Spiro Salad." Maura stated as Jane put the car into drive and pulled out into traffic from the clinic's parking lot.

"Sounds good you sure?" Jane asked as she signaled to move to the next lane.

"Yes, I am sure Jane. So how is Aine?" Maura asked as she watched Jane maneuver through afternoon traffic effortlessly. The city was alive today with a warm weather. Maybe she could temp Jane with some shopping.

"He will recover. He has been reinstated, but he is seeing the department's psychologist. This threw him for a loop. Marston and Albert said not to worry. They will have him back on track in no time. Elizabeth's family has gone into seclusion to avoid the press Marston stated. They are protecting them. I can't imagine having one of your children kill another one of your children. I hope they take the help that's been offered." Jane said softly as she turned down a side street and then drove into the lot down from Uburger's. Jane helped Maura out of her side and paid the lot attendant. She opened the glass doors and gave their order at the counter. Jane and Maura took a seat in front of the window. Jane fidgeted a little as she struggled to ask a question of Maura.

"Are you ready to move forward Maura?" Jane asked taking her love's hands into hers. Maura's eyes reflected back all the love she had for Jane. After all they had been through it was a little surreal that they had made it through. Maura knew they were stronger for it, but she made sure in the next second that Jane knew too.

"As long as I am with you Jane, as long as I am with you." Maura said softly. The attendant brought their burger and salad to them. They ate lunch while talking over small talk. Jane stretched for the first time in weeks without pain or fear.

"I feel like I have been in this dull, numb place for so long. Sort of like my feelings had been glazed over with ice. It wasn't until you returned to me that the ice cracked and began melting." Jane reached across the table taking Maura's hands again. "Your love and warmth Maura have restored me. Now all I feel is the fiery passionate joy of your love. Thank you for coming after me." Jane said rising out of her chair and kissing the medical examiner.

"Jane Rizzoli, you take my breath away. I love you so much. Don't you know you have done the same for me? How about we head home and explore that fiery passionate joy?" Maura smiled wolfishly as her eyes promised to grant Jane's every wish.

"As you wish!"

THE END


End file.
